In The Shadow of the Day
by A Cullen Wannabe
Summary: Taking place 17 yrs after Breaking Dawn. Angelina, Bella's orphaned sister raised by the Cullens, strives to find her place in the world. Lina develops a special friendship with a much favored pack member, but is it just friendship or much more? Complete
1. Chapter 1

**1. Ever the Ugly Duckling**

Slowly opening my bleary eyes, I found myself squinting at the morning sunlight streaming through the eastern wall of my bedroom that consisted entirely of plate glass. I leaned up on my elbow looking around my messy bedroom trying to remember where I tossed the book I was reading last night when my exhaustion finally took priority over my fascination with the story I had found so difficult to put down. I desperately wanted to finish the last few chapters before I actually went downstairs to face the family meeting that was sure to be waiting for me. It's not like I was trying to escape from boredom in my life….far from it considering my family…but perhaps escape into the world of fantasy is even more important when your life plays out like a science fiction novel on a daily basis.

I finally found my book tucked between the mattress and the wall just under my headboard and opened it to where I had left off the night before. The plain jane girl next door was just about to find out that she had a kindred spirit in the handsome football player that had sat next to her all year. He had never even noticed her until a few days ago when she found the strength to defend a girl being teased and I couldn't wait to put myself in her shoes hoping that once again the handsome boy would fall hopelessly in love with my novella counterpart. Of course I would love books like this, even as light and totally generic as they were, it was so me. I was the unassuming lackluster member of my family. A family of angels, all perfect in form and grace, forever youthful and statuesque. Someday I might be more like them, but not anytime soon. I flipped through the book devouring the lightweight pages full of formula romantic banter until my alarm rang out 30 minutes later telling me that it was time to pull myself out of my room and face the day. Besides…they all knew I was awake the second I gained consciousness…they would have heard my subtle movements and the telltale change in my breathing and heart rate immediately.

I stood up and stretched my arms and legs in an attempt to pull the tight muscles into some form of shape adequate to navigate my way to the bathroom. I never had to worry about a line for the showers in the mornings…I was the only one living in this house who really needed to use the shower…for the rest of my family it was just a prop to keep up the façade of normality. The only two other family members who ever used this space had a home of their own that they usually took care of such needs in about a mile up the road from our home. I stumbled into the bathroom and turned on the water of the shower allowing the temp to rise to the steamy temperature I loved. My sister told me once that I acquired my taste for super hot showers from our mother just like she had.

For some reason this morning my mind wondered to my mother as I stepped into the hot shower and began to let the water run down my face and hair. I didn't really remember much about my mother or my father…my sister and her extended family have taken care of me since I was very young.

I was only four years old when my parents were killed in a horrible plane crash on the way back from an away game. We lived in Florida then and my Dad played for a minor league team and coached a local high school baseball team in the off season. Ironically, it was the first time that my mother had gone with my father on the road since I had come along. I was uneasy when she left me to stay with close friends, my mother had never left me behind before. Neither of my parents had any family besides my sister. As she left me behind with her best friend Celeste and her family, somewhere deep down I had a feeling that things were going to change.

I was sort of a surprise for my parents. My mother had never expected to have a second child. My sister Bella had been the result of an early marriage that resulted in Bella and a subsequent early divorce. She remained single for much of Bella's childhood finally marrying my father when Bella was 17. Bella went to live with her father in Washington after that so that my mother could travel with my father. It was there that Bella met and fell in love with my brother in law Edward and joined his extended family just a year and a half later. What nobody knew until quite a while later was that I attended that wedding right along with everyone else…just nobody knew I was there. Little did my sister's unsuspecting family know that in a few short years they would end up having yet another charge to care for in me…and that would be a huge change for them for sure! That was when my name officially changed to Angelina Cecelia Cullen and my life was forever altered.

My walk down memory lane had taken hold of me so fiercely that I had lost all track of time and completed my shower without even realizing what I was doing. I turned one more time to let the water hit the muscles of my neck and shoulders when suddenly I was ripped from my reverie by a sudden icy shift in water temperature. I jumped out screaming and snapped off the taps almost certain I could hear the gregarious laughter of my sort-of-brother, Emmett, downstairs.

Emmett was always messing with me. He was far more like a teasing and relentless older brother which was actually very much the role he's supposed to be playing these days now that I only look a few years younger than him, as opposed to the uncle figure he played when I was younger. That was just one of the many benefits of living with a family that never ages…I keep growing older appearing to be closer and closer to their ages while they all stay perpetually between the ages of 17 and 26. One of the many perks of being a vampire…that and perfect indestructible bodies and unbearably angelic beauty.

Yeah, my life was definitely the inspiration for many a sci fi novel…or maybe a sad tv comedy show. I often drew parallels between myself and Marilyn, the niece from the show The Munsters…except my unique family were the gorgeous ones and I was the hideous monstrosity. I began to contemplate this thought process as I began to run the comb through my hair and finish grooming myself in anticipation of the day. Even for a mere mortal I was far worse than ordinary to spite the perpetual argument to the contrary by my sweet but misguided family.

Bella has admitted often to me how plain she had felt in the shadow of the rest of the Cullen clan before her transformation into a vampire herself shortly after her wedding…but I had seen plenty of pictures of Bella in human form and I knew for a fact that she had to be embellishing for my benefit. Bella was always beautiful, petite and slender with an always perfect peaches and cream complexion; albeit more than a little clumsy…but her beauty more than made up for that.

I on the other hand was the polar opposite of slight and gorgeous Bella. I'm guessing my father's genes must have been predominant in my genetics because I was so different in nearly every way. I was stockier, taller, and while not necessarily obese I was never slender. Where Bella had heart shaped face with a porcelain peaches and cream complexion, I was not so lucky needing plenty of makeup to smooth out the many freckles that invaded the crest of my slightly too large nose and cheeks on my plain and slightly rounded face. We did manage to have the same dark chestnut hair and I had inherited my fathers wide green eyes as opposed to her warm chocolate ones.

I sighed in the mirror staring at those green eyes, the one attribute of my face that I actually liked. Of course if I ever did become like them I WOULD have to loose the one thing I liked about myself….for my eyes would start off red and then slowly revert to the light topaz color of the rest of my family. The only exception to the uniform color of my family's eyes was my half vampire half human goddess of a niece Renesmee, who was officially billed as my sister ever since I was brought into the family, and her husband Jacob, my gentle giant werewolf like shape shifter…nephew in law…both of whom aged to about the physical maturity of 25 year olds and then stopped there perfectly preserved. I really wasn't kidding about the science fiction.

I quickly dusted my face with a layer of expensive mineral makeup that Edward's sisters Alice and Rosalie insisted on buying for me. They both tried so desperately over the years to turn me into a fashion plate as they had failed to do with Bella, but a lot of their efforts were only partially rewarded since I found it hard to try so hard when no matter what I did I would always pale (no pun intended) in comparison with their unfailing beauty. I know they will never give up completely though.

"Okay, enough avoiding Lina, time to go face your fate" I whispered to myself in the mirror, as much of a warning to my family that I was about to come down and join them as it was an affirmation to myself of what was to come.


	2. Chapter 2

**2. IF YOU NEVER ASK...**

I opened the door to the hallway and began to make my way to the staircase that leads down to the family room. When I finally got far enough down to see into the big family room, I was met with the smiling face of Esme, the lady who had pretty much taken over the majority of my care since I moved in with the Cullens. I was so young when my parents died that I really don't have more than a few faint memories and fuzzy feelings about them….in every real way Esme was the only mother I will ever truly know.

"Good Morning Angelina" she said to me and I took the final step and had finally reached the ground floor. "Sorry about the cold blast up there….I had asked Rosalie to let you know that I had some breakfast ready for you, but Emmett took it upon himself to force you down early instead."

"It's okay Mom…" I replied warmly and then added with a little more vehemence "I'll deal with _him_ later." I heard Emmett snicker in the next room.

"Well everyone's in the dining room waiting for you….you can eat while you discuss with us whatever it was that you said you wanted to talk to everyone about last night."

My stomach drew into a knot. First of all, I hate eating alone in front of my family. I was the only one besides Jake, and on occasion Nessie, that ate human food, and they were off on another honeymoon trip until tomorrow. Secondly, I had worked up my nerve last night to hold a family meeting to discuss my request only to find out too late that half the family had gone on a hunting trip. My family is a group of benevolent vampires, never partaking of human blood, but instead traveling into the wilderness every couple of weeks to hunt for wild animal game. Of course I would pick the one time during a two-week stretch that they would be gone.

"Thanks Mom" I said with a huge gulp trying to force down the large lump that had settled just below my voice box. I tried to remember the perfect speech that I had in my mind ready to go the night before, but it was suddenly lost in the chasm of my head. Oh well, It didn't matter, Edward would already know what I was thinking as soon as I walked down the stairs with his freaky mind reading skill….boy I'd love to have Bella's shielding ability sometimes…and Alice probably saw this all fold out in a vision as soon as I decided to ask them to do this for me. Okay…fine…two down who know exactly what I'm about to say…now just to make everyone else understand my plea.

I stepped into the dining room with a place already set for me at the head of the table with two other plates on either side and my whole family looking up at me expectantly. An instant smile flooded my face….there sat Renesmee and Jacob.

"Nessie, Jake! I didn't think you were coming home until tomorrow!"  
"Oh how long can you really sit on a beach in Hawaii anyway? We were homesick…but we did stop back in Washington on our way home to see the old pack in La Push," Nessie replied

"First of all, how is it that you could ever get tired of Hawaii?! Are you crazy?! It IS good you guys stopped in through Washington though….I bet the pack really misses you." I commented to Jake. "Anyway, I'm glad you guys are here…now I won't have to re-cap later."

"Hey Leeny" Jacob beamed up at me from his seat at the table…."come grab some grub first…I can hear your stomach churning like a washing machine from here kid!" Jacob called over his fork motioning for me to take my seat.

It was then that the smell of the food hit me and it smelled like heaven. I'd been working so hard to keep from rushing this conversation that I had not realized how ravenous I was. I sat down, cut off a chunk of my pancake that was smothered in strawberries and whipped cream and ate it with a satisfied moan. My mom smiled at me, always happy when she receives praise for her cooking by means of spontaneous reactions. I hated making my family wait while I ate to hear what I had to say, but the food was just too good and I hadn't eaten since lunchtime the day before thanks to my nerves.

The intimate couple-centric conversations started as we ate. This was a very regular occurrence, which I'm sure they did far more than any of them ever realized. There were times when this house could get pretty lonely for those of us not eternally linked to a soul mate…to spite the 10 other bodies milling around you. Nessie caught my look and then turned her gaze to Jacob and touching his hand lovingly relaying something to him in her own special form of communication. Nessie's gift is that she can plant her thoughts and feelings straight into someone's mind…something she finds far more convenient than speaking since it conveys her full emotional as well as intellectual response far better than words ever could.

Finally, receiving Nessie's commentary, Jake remembered I was there (he often forgets that anyone else in the world exists while in the presence of Nessie) and started telling me a bit more about their stop in Washington. I listened with partial interest trying to remember the exact speech I had worked up for the meeting last night. He finally began to wind down the conversation seeing that I was about ready to get going "Oh and you've gotta check out the pics we took while we were there after we're done here today…help you put a few faces with the names."

"Thanks Jake…remind me later would ya?" I interjected and then took a deep breath, cleared my throat as I pushed my plate away from me, and straightened my back and shoulders as I began.

"Sorry I made you wait so long guys," I finally managed to get out after I had adequately calmed my beating heart. "I hadn't realized how hungry I was until I smelled it!" They all nodded in understanding…this was pretty much how their whole existence was…just instead of pancakes, it was the smell of blood that would unexpectedly whet their growing appetites.

"Okay, this week is the start of yet another school year in yet another new town….and I was sort of hoping, and give this idea a real chance before you shoot it down…. that I might be able to maybe go alone this year." I finally blurted.

The silence was deafening….I paused waiting for some reactions from my suddenly frozen family of statues lost each in their own thoughts. Only Edward, Alice, and Jacob were still moving more freely while the rest thought out my request rapidly in their minds.

My entire life I have never gone to school all alone. From my first day at kindergarten, most if not all of my perpetually teenage family members had attended with me in school systems where all of the buildings were located very closely on a small parcel of land keeping watch over me and keeping me safe. It wasn't until I finally hit high school two years ago that we were able to go to a larger school system where all the grades weren't located on one campus. I never did understand the huge need for them to be there…but at every new school district they would all enter as either freshman or sophomores depending on their apparent physical ages and attend until the last of them graduated and then we would move to a new district where they would start the process all over again.

At first it was neat knowing I was being taken care of, my very own loving guardian angels keeping watch from a few rooms away. Then as I got older, things began to get more and more complicated. When I hit the age where I started noticing boys, I was wishing desperately that Edward didn't insist on being one of my guardians every year. Junior High was pretty rough because that is the time when you are the most gangly and awkward and it's when you really start to learn to deal with the petty vehemence of preteen girls. It was a chore to keep myself in a positive mindset for fear that my siblings would feel the need to step in and protect me as they always felt compelled to do. High school was the worst though because all of a sudden they were mixed with my peers and they were so overprotective that I really wasn't able to do anything. Most normal humans shy away from my beautiful family members as an instinctual form of self-preservation, and since they were always hovering around me, I was sort of treated the same way…even while alone.

Finally I broke the silence again, "…or maybe just me and Nessie if you're not comfortable with me being completely on my own." still no movement….CRAP!

"I understand why you would want to go alone I guess, Lina, I just don't like it," my sister Bella finally mumbled from her place on Edward's lap. Bella and Edward were still disgustingly lovey dovey even after 17 years of marriage. "What if something happens? We wouldn't be there to protect you if someone comes looking for us and happens upon you first. You know you are covered in our scent, their fascination with a human holding such a strong combination of vampire scents would be overpowering. I think it's too dangerous!"

Bella was always the most overprotective of all. I'm not sure how much of it was because I was her sister, how much of it was because I was as much like a daughter to her as a sister, and one that grew at a slower human rate with human frailties unlike her biological daughter with Edward, or if it was simply that I, by some chance of fate, had green eyes just like Edward had when he had been human over a century ago.

"Bella, please, I'm not exactly helpless you know" I replied smiling widely at Emmett and Jasper.

Thankfully, I was lucky enough to be slightly more graceful than Bella, and due to the influences of Emmett and Edward's other brother Jasper, I had been encouraged from a young age to be involved in the martial arts as a means of protecting myself as much as possible. I was quite good a Judo and with the ability to use my opponents own momentum and strength against them, I was actually capable of doing a fairly decent job of holding my own for very short periods of time even amongst the very strong and fast ranks of my family…much less a human.

"If I can hold off Emmett or Jasper for nearly 10 seconds, I'm pretty sure I could handle any human who might mean me harm and manage to evade most vampires long enough for Alice to send backup."

I had more that I wanted to say, but then Bella interrupted again, "Yes, but you can't really count your abilities to really be that effective great against a real threat Lina. Emmett and Jasper love you and never have really gone at you with any true malicious instinct. Not to mention that it's always with the other close enough to grab the attacker if they get too close to actually winning. It's different when the threat is real and you are actually scared."

I immediately recognized that this wasn't going to happen without some majorly convincing coercion on my part and a lot of backup from the majority of the rest of the family. Bella tended to cling onto me much more tightly than maybe she should simply because I was part of Renee and a link to her own human past. She remembers her frailty and always mentally put me on that same footing. But honestly, as far as physical strength and prowess went, I was like night to her day.

"Okay, I will give you that I guess." I added with chagrin. "But you really can't deny that I could handle any human threat at least, and we can still rely on Alice's ability more or less, not to mention that I know that you would be unable to keep Edward from passing my the school at least once an hour to check on me….I'll be fine and I might actually have a chance to truly experience high school for real."

I could tell that most of the room were hearing me and leaning toward my side…but I still had to convince Bella to get a solid yet.

"Listen, I only have two years left and then I'll be graduating. After all, I have no intention of being frozen at an age young enough to have to be repeating high school perpetually for the rest of eternity unless I have no other recourse…so, God willing, this is my one shot….I'd really like to get the full experience without any overshadowing by my idealistically beautiful yet somewhat unnerving family…..please forgive me for that but you all know it's true."

I could see the pain in their eyes. They loved me and never meant me any harm in the things that they had done in an attempt to shield me. Truthfully all eight of my completely vampiric family members looked at me and treated me as their own child throughout my time with them. They couldn't help but be overprotective and hover….I was more like a delicate priceless treasure fashioned out of crystal to them than the mere mortal I was….but I desperately needed my own space to be human and school was pretty much the only place that I could safely do that. I was willing to compromise on Nessie, even though she really did look too old to be in high school now, she could pass for an extremely mature Junior and she had so many human like qualities that the others at school did not typically react negatively to her. Sure she'd steal a lot of the attention with her ethereal beauty, but she wouldn't be scaring anyone away and I was hoping that offering up the idea of her attending with me to watch my back might help them be more willing to stay home if they weren't willing to let me go alone.

Finally the patriarch of our family, my father Carlisle, spoke up, "Lina, do you mind if we take little time to mull it over and discuss it? I promise we will try to be as judicious as we can."

"That's all I can ask and you know that I will not complain whatever you decide, but I just had to ask."

I locked eyes with various members of my family who looked particularly abashed by my request. "Please, please don't be hurt….the last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's not like I get many safe opportunities to be free to really be me. I know my boundaries and I'll respect them. I just need a chance to be….well, normal…ya know?"

I saw from their eyes that they did know. There were very few at that table that wouldn't trade their immortality in a second to be human again for just one day. I picked up my plate and glass of orange juice, smiled at Edward, who I could already tell was going to be pulling for me…after all, he had fought tooth and nail to get my sister to hold out as long as he possibly could to experience all the human experiences possible before she underwent her transformation and he had the same ambitions for me and to his great relief I was in no way resistant to that. He had dreams of the ivy league for me….but I certainly couldn't tread the hallowed halls of Dartmouth as he dreamed if I couldn't even manage to survive a day in the small high school I was about to attend.

I paused before I left the room. "Oh, it's supposed to be gorgeous out today. Ness, Jake, do you guys think you'd be up for a trip to the beach today with me? I know, I know, you just escaped the oh-so-less-than-enough to keep you entertained beaches of Hawaii just recently, but I could REALLY use a day out!"

"Sure, sure" Jake replied. "How soon you wanting to leave?"

"I thought I'd finish my breakfast in my room so that everyone can discuss. How 'bout you guys come get me after you're done….and if it looks like deliberations will take all day then come rescue me in about an hour or so? I'm going to go read and finish this stuff in the meantime"

"Sounds good, kid. See you in a few."

I returned to my room hoping they would let me know sooner rather than later…the suspense was killing me!


	3. Chapter 3

**3. Eavesdropper Sometimes Prosper**

Every once in a while bits and pieces of the conversation would make it up to my ears in my room. While my hearing was not nearly as acute as my family's it was more sensitive than most other humans.

I didn't catch everything, but I did hear Bella and Edward actually arguing about me. Ugh…that made me feel extremely guilty. Edward usually tried extremely hard to make and keep Bella happy. He really hated it when she was not happy in general, but especially when she was unhappy with him. But at the same time it made me hopeful because if Edward felt strongly enough to actually argue with her then it meant he really did back me one hundred percent.

"Bella, love, she is very capable and mature and we can't keep her trapped in this house forever! Do you realize that she's the only person in this family that never gets to really have any true privacy? Remember how you felt when you were human we were all so overprotective of you? You at least had your mind to retreat to, where nobody could tread and you could come and go from school and work and live your life. If Lina leaves this house we always make sure that one of us is with her and even while she is alone in her room she knows that we hear every move she makes and I can still hear her thoughts. It's maddening for her as it would be for anybody! Honestly it's an absolute miracle that she's as well adjusted as she is!"

"I recognize all of that Edward! Truly I do! But the truth is that she needs protection. It's not that she draws danger, she's not like me in that way, but WE do and she's a part of us, so she's always in danger and yet has no way to protect herself really."

"Bella, she's stronger than you think." Emmett finally chimed in. "I don't want you kill me right now, but Jasper and I really don't hold off very much at all these days. She's actually amazing…she moves faster and reacts faster than any human I've ever known."

"You WHAT?" I could picture Bella's face distorting in anger, her lips pulling back over her teeth.

I had to stifle a giggle. He'd catch hell for admitting that to her later, but I had to admit that it did give me a major boost in confidence. I really did think that they were still holding way back on me. It felt good to know I was doing better than I had believed.

"Calm down Bella" Jasper interjected and I was sure he was issuing waves of peace throughout the room to help her relax. "We may hold back less in our attack, but we're far more diligent than ever in our supervision too. You know we'd never let her be hurt and we want her to be as strong as can be. The day might come when she won't be with us anymore…she might choose to have a human life and a human family and to be on her own in which case we wouldn't be able to watch over her. It's more important that she be able to take care of herself."

I didn't hear any more than that because things had calmed down and they had lowered their voices again to a level that was not loud enough to reach my ears. I guessed that Edward had read my thoughts and knew I was hearing the discussion. A few minutes later I heard the light sound of stealthy footsteps on the stairs and realized that Edward must have suggested that Jake and Nessie take me out as I had requested so they could debate longer.

There was a gentle knock at the door and I gave permission for them to enter.

"So squirt, you ready to go?" Jake asked.

"Sure, just a sec." I said as I sat back on my bed to place the towel, book, and swimsuit I had gotten out for our trip after I got upstairs into my duffel bag.

As I did Nessie sat down next to me on the bed and placed her delicate hand on my arm. I looked up into her chocolate brown eyes that seemed so deep and unending as she showed me her thoughts and feelings about my wishes.

In my mind I saw myself sitting alone looking sad and lonely in the dining room while all of the members of my family were discussing their own topics at breakfast. Concern filled her mind and guilt at leaving me out. The faces of each couple cuddling flashed through my mind and then my face alone and then the two of us. There was a question there….did I really want her to go with me to school…was she the companionship that I was really needing…was I fearful to go alone? Then there was pride that I was brave enough to bring up my true feelings and an acknowledgement that she encouraged the family to let me go alone, but a willingness to go with me if it was a necessity and her belief that her mother would fold in the end. I could feel the love for me emanating off my precious niece who felt more like a sister and I felt the same love for her.

I smiled widely and thanked her and then we all got up and headed for the door. "No Ness, I'm not afraid to go alone. I think it would be good for me….and thanks for being willing to go with me if that's their condition. I know you'd probably rather not have to do the whole high school thing again, especially since you don't look so young that it will ever be a necessity."

She shrugged and smiled. She knew that two years weren't going to be more than a molecule of water in the bucket of the long life that lay ahead of her.

I could hear the murmur of voices as we reached the top of the stairs, too fast and low for most humans to hear, but then I wasn't most humans. I never admitted to them that I could understand them even when in frantic super fast speech mode. It helped me to glean things they didn't necessarily want me to know about…particularly during stressful situations. I'm sure Edward knew, but he never gave me away. For such a sneaky little mind reader, he really was as respectful as he could possibly be of everyone's privacy and if I didn't already love him…I would have loved him for that.

I smiled to myself in satisfaction as we closed the front door behind us and headed out to Nessie and Jake's brand new red Corvette convertible, a wedding gift from Edward of course. During our trek to the front door I had heard far more than they ever suspected and the tide of the discussion was turning in my favor!


	4. Chapter 4

**4. Am I Dreaming?**

Jake, Nessie, and I had a great time at the beach and thankfully they only made my stomach turn with sickeningly sweet reenactments of epic romance movies set on the beach three times during our day there. I'm sure it would have been worse if Nessie hadn't noticed my loneliness this morning at breakfast and was making a concerted effort not to be too engrossed in one another for my sake.

They also made a concerted effort to give me some privacy as much as they could and even went for a nice 30 minute walk up and down the shore, always within view of me just in case. I took full advantage of this nice break by stretching out on a lounge chair to soak in some nice relaxing rays and re-immersing myself in my novel. I let my imagination run free as the handsome football player offered to take my storyline counterpart home after school when her car broke down in the parking lot on a rainy day. Just as the boy was starting to ask the girl a little bit about herself to keep up conversation during their drive my story was abruptly interrupted by a Frisbee glancing quite forcefully off the back of my head.

"Ouch!" I yelled reflexively rubbing the line of pain that was stretching across the back of my skull where the Frisbee made contact.

"Oh my Gosh! I'm so sorry" the most beautiful boy I had seen in my life, well human boy at least, said as he ran up to me looking terribly embarrassed. "Are you okay?"

I sat there staring up at him completely dumbfounded. He was nicely tanned with short blonde hair that was just long enough to blow slightly in the breeze without getting in his face. His eyes were the most amazing color of blue…almost like a sapphire…out of which he looked at me with a concerned expression.

My mind started reeling…did I finally totally lose my mind? Was I finally actually hallucinating the storyline of my novel? But no…my novel didn't take place on a beach and the guy in the novel was brunette with brown eyes…so this wasn't my book I was experiencing.

Just then in my peripheral vision I saw Jacob tense like he was going to dart over to my side and protect me. The realization that this was all real finally set in and I motioned with my hand that I was okay as I continued to stare at the beautiful boy unable to form the words in my mind to respond.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity I managed to mumble "Um…I'm okay I think."

"Jeez, I'm so sorry. My friend totally misjudged his aim and overshot my head by about three feet. Are you sure you're okay?"

I finally pulled myself out of my mute stupor and smiled at the boy trying my best to be cool and casual.

"I think I'll survive." I managed to say with a slight smile while still rubbing my head unconsciously. "I have four older brothers, I've had worse."

"Wow! Four older brothers…I'm sure you have then. I guess now that we've nearly left you brain damaged I should introduce myself. I'm Lucas, and that dork over there is Travis." He said smiling and nodding toward the other boy who was equally tanned with his dark brown buzzed hair and Rayban sunglasses. He seemed to be growing impatient with his friends lingering at my side.

"Hi Lucas, my name is Lina."

"Lina? That's one you don't hear very often."

"Well my name is actually Angelina, but my Mother had a thing for picking names that were pithy if you drop the first part. I have a sister named Bella, short for Isabella."

"Well since I haven't seen you around before you are either on vacation or just moved here and since this isn't a real big vacation spot….I'm guessing you must be part of the new doctor's family that moved to town."

"Yep….I'm the youngest. And those two lovebirds walking the shore over there that look like they belong on the cover of a Harlequin romance novel are my sister Nessie and Jake."

"Nessie…I'm guessing that's another nickname?"

"Yep…short for Renesmee."

"Okay well hers was definitely more original before the shortened version! Man…could they be any more in need of a room right now?" Lucas commented blushing slightly in the direction of my sister and brother-in-law.

I looked over and found to my embarrassment that the happy couple chose that very moment to be rolling around in the surf doing an ever so slightly less risqué imitation of Chris Isaac's Wicked Game music video. "Ah yes….welcome to my world! You should see our house on Valentine's Day!"

"They're that bad huh?"

"Take them and add four more happy couples to the mix and you have an idea of my Valentine's Day hell!"

"Wait….five couples?"

"My family is really tight knit…nobody really leaves the nest…they just get married and bring the newcomer into the flock. Our parents are really young and have legally adopted five of us…but I call them all my brothers and sisters…there's no use in messing with the whole in-law thing because it just gets too confusing."

"So how many of you guys will be starting school with us next week?"

"Oh, probably just me."

"Probably?"

Oops…I still didn't know my fate, so I didn't know what to answer…time to cover.

"Oh, Nessie might be going into a special program this year. It's an early placement college thing." I lied. Thankfully he seemed to buy it….good thing I was an experienced liar by now.

"Cool….what grade are you going into?"

"Junior."

"Hey, me too…maybe we'll have some classes together. Well, I'll let you get back to your book. Sorry again about the head…let me make up for it by introducing you to a few people next week?"

My heart started beating wildly again. This was real right? Because right now it really was playing out like one of my novels.

"Yeah," I said nearly breathless, "that would be really great!"

The beautiful boy turned to go back to his friend and I picked my book back up not really reading the pages, and kept running the occurrences of the last few minutes through my head. They really did happen, right?

Then the realization hit me….I was going to go to my first day of school having already met someone from the school…and he was really hot…and he seemed really nice. All of a sudden my excitement for going to school alone multiplied threefold. If my family really did give in I had a feeling this was going to be a really good year!


	5. Chapter 5

**5. Oh Sweet Success**

On the ride home Jacob and Renesmee were relentless. They kept asking about the boy that I seemed to have quite a lot to talk to about on the beach today. I could tell that they thought it would make a good reinforcement to my whole point about me being able to make friends and actually have a life of my own at school, but I was more afraid it would make Bella react in the opposite way.

We debated what to tell once we got home…although I already knew that if Alice saw what happened today that she might have already shared and if not then Edward would be reading the thoughts that were certain to be screaming out of my head as soon as I walked in the door. Either way, some, if not all of them would know anyway.

The sun was almost down when we finally made it back to the Cullen homestead and were walking through the front door. The rest of my family was sitting in the living room waiting for us. I had a feeling that they had reached a decision and I was a little nervous to hear what they had to say. I sat my bag down by the front door and went to take the open seat left for me on the far side of the room. My adoptive father finally spoke up when I was finally settled.

"How was your day today? Did you have fun at the beach?"

I smiled brightly thinking of the wonderful taste of what school life might end up being for me this year if they decided to say yes.

"Oh yes" I replied excitedly.

Edward snickered from his spot on the couch obviously getting a glimpse of the many events of the day reeling through my mind, most likely including the short time that I was questioning my sanity.

"I really did. I even got to talk to a kid that's going to be in my class this year." I might as well get it out in the open now….besides, from the looks I saw passed about the room, Alice must have seen it happening and tried using it as leverage during the debate.

"Yes…we did hear a little about that from Alice. I am sorry that we once again invaded your privacy, but when you hear what was finally decided thanks to that revelation I think you will be pleased. We have decided that you have every right to have a life of your own and you can attend school this year on your own."

"REALLY?" I squealed a bit too loudly and excitedly. "Really and truly?!"

They all smiled at me, Jasper and Edward actually laughing out loud at their reception of my pure joy and elation. I was so excited I could barely contain myself giving in to my more juvenile instincts and bouncing up and down in the middle of the living room floor. Then everybody joined in on the laughter. I ran over and hugged Bella and then Edward and Alice, and then my parents continuing around the room chanting "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

After giving me a few minutes to enjoy my reverie and to calm down, my father said that there were a few things to discuss though. Okay…here it comes…my conditions. All I could think was that I hoped that they were as fair as my father had promised that they would be.

"You won't have total privacy because Alice will be watching and Edward will make several routine drive bys throughout the school day to make sure that all is well. Hopefully this will all work out fine, but as a contingency plan we will have things ready to transfer Renesmee in from her _alternative early college admission_ program." He said raising his eyebrows at the last part.

I winced, "Sorry, I sort of slipped and I panicked not knowing what you guys had decided…if I had said I was going to attend alone then it would have been odd for her to be coming to school with me. It was a stupid mistake…I promise I'll be more careful."

"Well, it wasn't really your fault…it was a natural question for him to ask and you really didn't know…so it was actually good thinking. I know you'll be fine. You're definitely not new to keeping the balance of being yourself and yet keeping necessary things secret. We all have faith in you."

I looked around the room with tears in my eyes. "Thank you all so much. You won't be disappointed and I have to say after today I'm really excited to start school. I'm really going to get out there and try to be an active part of things. Get the whole high school experience."

For the first time in my presence today Rosalie spoke up. "Speaking of the whole high school experience, I think it's time we girls go on a shopping trip. I think some new upperclassmen outfits are in order…don't you agree Alice?"

"ABSOLUTELY!" Alice chimed. "If you're going to do this thing right then you need the right accessories!"

"Okay, that sounds like a good idea as long as you guys remember that I won't be attending high school in Beverly Hills. We need to keep it casual and reasonable. No satin cocktail dresses or organza and no overly ostentatious designers!"

"You take all the fun out of it!" Rosalie groaned.

"Take it or leave it ladies."

Rosalie and Alice looked at each other and said "Take it" in unison. I knew this was going to be interesting.


	6. Chapter 6

**6. The Best Gifts Are Big and Metallic**

The days leading up to my first day flying solo in high school seemed to drag on forever. Between Alice and Rosalie dragging me to every upscale boutique on the east coast and Bella constantly reminding me of things I should keep in mind at school I was starting to get really nervous about my first day.

It was an uphill battle reigning in Alice and Rosalie. They finally chilled out a bit when I compromised allowing them to buy me a pair of high end designer boots to go along with my several pair of designer jeans and shirts. I figured it was a reasonable compromise since they would have had me looking like a teenybopper Carrie Bradshaw wannabe otherwise. By the time we were finally done shopping I was glad to have quite a few outfits that I was actually quite happy with and would feel halfway comfortable in.

I woke up for my first day of school to a very early alarm. I had given myself a ton of extra time to get my nerves calmed and get groomed and ready for my first day. I wanted to look as good as possible which meant a lot of steps that I didn't really bother with on a daily basis.

This was definitely one of those mornings that I was glad that I didn't have to worry about waking the rest of the house by blasting music early in the morning. I turned up my stereo full blast choosing a song with a strong bass beat and an upbeat tone to keep me positive and motivated. I had warned my Fashionista Nazi sisters that they were to under no circumstances bother me this morning with make up tips or anything of the sort. I was going to do the things I deemed necessary and not a bit more and they were to keep their mouths shut if it wasn't enough. Thankfully they obeyed me and let me get ready in peace.

An hour later I was finally dressed and took a moment to observe the results in the mirror. It was strange to see myself all made up; in addition to my usual mineral base I had utilized my extensive options of colors to give my cheeks a light rosy appearance to bring out my cheekbones and narrow my face a little more. I also combined brown, pewter, and a touch of green eye shadow to create a smoky eye that also brought a bit of my eye color out. I wore my hair down and soft around my face, a new one for the girl who pretty much lived in a ponytail for most of her life. For my first day outfit I chose a pair of artfully faded designer boot cut blue jeans and a green and purple short sleeve chiffon shirt by a designer I had never heard of but Alice and Rosalie couldn't stop drooling about. It was a bit dressy for the first day, but not too terribly bad and I did like how it hung on me and what it did for my eyes. The one lesson I learned early from Rose and Alice was to always play up your best feature and my eyes were all I had to work with so I ran with it. I also wore my new designer flat heeled biker boots…I'm sure they weren't what the girls had in mind when I agreed to our compromise, but in the end a highly recognized designer's footware are still designer so they couldn't say too much. I really couldn't see myself tottering precariously on the skinny little heels on the higher heeled boots all day. I might have been more graceful than my sister, but I was also a lot harder on my shoes and I could see those things snapping in five minutes.

Finally after a few minutes evaluation I decided it was as good as it was going to get and if I waited too much longer I was going to be late. I left the bathroom, stopped by my room to grab my book bag and new black patent leather jacket that the girls had insisted on and made my way to the front room wondering who my chauffer for the day was going to be.

I had my license and was actually an extremely good driver, although I did have a bit of a lead foot, (Not that anybody could fault me…my teachers were the ultimate speed demons) but I wasn't allowed to drive anywhere because my siblings still considered me a slow driver. I didn't have a car of my own yet because there was no need and I never went anywhere alone anyway.

I reached the end of the hall and started down the stairs. I wasn't even halfway down the staircase when I heard a gasp of inhaled air, all taken in unison by everyone in the room. I froze wondering what I did wrong, fighting the instinct to run right back to my room and hide, but when I turned to look at the expressions of my family, I didn't find the looks of dismay and/or confusion that I had expected…instead they looked sort of in awe. Even Alice and Rosalie, who helped me pick out my outfits and pick my make up colors, seemed to be taken aback by my new look. I flushed in embarrassment and then finished descending the staircase.

I felt really uncomfortable standing there in front of my family of angels and having them all regard me like a priceless work of art. I had seen my reflection in the mirror and I was far from equal to this level of appreciation. Finally my Mom came forward and hugged me. If she were capable of crying there would have been tears brimming her eyelids.

"You look absolutely breathtaking Lina! You are going to have a wonderful first day of school…I just know it!"

"Okay, first of all, thanks Mom…and secondly, would you guys please stop working so hard to make me feel better? I know exactly what I look like today and I definitely don't deserve the looks you guys are giving me now. So please stop before you guys freak me out even more!"

Edward shook his head with a half smile on his face. "Bella, she inherited your inability to see herself clearly. What's up with you girls? Is this something you inherited from Renee?"

"Don't ask me, I'm not sure where she gets her ideas!"

I stood there rolling my eyes at them all making a mental note to myself that they have all become far too masterful in their skills of deception and made my way into the kitchen to grab something to eat really quickly before school. I was so anxious that I wasn't that hungry, but knew I'd be starving by lunch if I didn't eat something so I grabbed an apple and a soda.

"Fruit and Caffeine, the breakfast of champions" I said to myself as I sliced the apple and tossed it in a plastic sandwich bag to take with me. I had already decided as soon as they all let out that ridiculous gasp that I was going to get to school early and maybe see if I could meet a few people before the first class of the day.

I went to spin on my newly purchased designer heels and suddenly realized that my whole family had been standing in the doorway watching me get my breakfast together, all smiling like the cat that ate the canary.

"Okay, so who's taking me to school today? I want to get an early start." Then they all started to chuckle a little.

"What are you guys looking so very suspiciously sneaky for? What's up?"

Edward stepped forward with his trademark half grin and handed me a small box with a bow. I looked at him questioningly and then at the rest of the family all watching in anticipation.

I slowly opened the box to find a set of keys with a very distinctive keychain. My mouth fell open not fully absorbing what the small keychain really meant. Surely they didn't. They wouldn't…Would they? For a few minutes all I could do was stare at the keychain unable to formulate even the smallest of sounds from my throat. I looked up at Edward my mind full of a dozen questions I couldn't make my lips form.

Taking my elbow he laughed a little and said, "How about we just show you." as he led me to the front door. He opened it for me and I looked out and there it was…in real life…truly sitting right there in front of me on the lawn all shiny and metallic in a gorgeous sapphire blue hue and in completely mint condition. It was an original 1968 Shelby Mustang GT500, my most dreamed about car in the whole world…just like Eleanor in the movie Gone in 60 Seconds. Of course Edward would know full well what my dream car was…I had only dreamed about that car every time a family member would get a new car since the movie came out. He was very pleased when I did eventually show am interest in cars, but disappointed that my tastes led more toward American muscle cars than his foreign jobs.

I stood in the doorway staring in disbelief…that is until I started to sway and get dizzy, and that's when I realized that I had forgotten to breathe. Edward and Emmett each caught one of my elbows as I began to fall backwards while laughing so hard that their grip vibrated me in their arms. Suddenly my utter and total joy broke through my shock and amazement and I squealed at the top of my lungs and turned throwing my hands around Edward's neck and jumping up and down.

"You got me Eleanor? I can't believe you guys got me Eleanor!" I was so excited that if it weren't for the designer clothes, shoes, and the hour I had just spent making myself as presentable as possible for the day I would have taken off doing cartwheels across the lawn.

When I finally recovered my senses I froze. "Wait, is this really mine?"

"Yes!" everyone said in unison.

Then my face fell, "But wait, won't it draw too much attention?"

"That's the beauty of it," Edward said, "Nobody but you will know it's original. If anybody asks, tell them that your brothers found in disrepair somewhere and fixed it up as a present for you. They'll buy it because no normal parents would ever give their 17 year old an original Shelby!" He threw in winking at our mom and dad. "And it's not all a lie. We did add a few extras for you…a new stereo and of course a governor so you don't go too _Mustang Sally_ on us."

"Wow," I whispered and then turned to face the whole family. "Thank you all so much. I can never tell you how much this means to me! You guys are the greatest!"

"Well, you deserve it. You're the best kid we've ever known and we've lived quite a long time kid!" Emmett shouted. "By the way, didn't you say you wanted to get to school early or something?"

"Oh…yeah….um, I guess I should go then." I hesitated at the door, not sure now that I was actually leaving how I really felt about really going out there all by myself to face the world. I was suddenly very nervous…feeling rooted in my spot and wanting to run back up to the safety of my room where I was nice and safe. I felt that way for a few seconds until I realized that nobody was sending me out alone…I knew as sure as I knew that the sky is blue that one of my brothers will most definitely be following me to school covertly. I was going to have an escort even if there was no chauffer.

"I love you guys….wish me luck!" I yelled over my shoulder as I bounced off the porch toward my beautiful new car.

They all yelled their own wishes of luck as I made my way to the beautiful classic, grazing my hand lovingly over the trunk lid as I pranced past it and slid into the driver's seat. It even smelled like heaven!

I put the key in the ignition and fired it up. The whole car rumbled to life under me and I giggled at the pure exhilaration. I gunned the engine a few times to feel the power under my fingertips and then put the car in gear and gunned the engine again fishtailing slightly before the traction took hold propelling me forward like a shot.

I let out a loud "WAHOOOO!" as I sped away from the house and waved out the window to my family watching from the porch behind me. Bella looked so tense that for a second I thought she might run after me and tell me to be more careful. Emmett was nowhere to be seen…probably took off as soon as my back was turned and had already beat me to the end of the drive that big punk! Oh well, I was on my way, hello big world…or at least big high school!!!


	7. Chapter 7

**7. School Daze**

I had far too much fun on my drive to school than I really should have. I was a good girl once I got close to city limits, but on the open back roads leading to town I felt the need to experiment with the limitations of my new baby…that and to see just how much limitation the governor my brothers added really enforced. I had a sneaking suspicion that they were more generous than they led the ladies of the house to believe. Rosalie was the only female with the mechanical knowledge to know any different and she knew that I always stayed within my personal control limits and wouldn't push the issue. I topped out at 110 before I ran out of open road and started reaching town and since I never normally drove above 90 or so, I knew whatever they did to limit my car wasn't going to get in the way of what I considered fun.

Once I reached town I dropped down to the speed limit and eased my way toward the school. The high school was in a large red brick building that had hardly any windows. I had been very confused by this strange school during my tour when we registered me for classes. It had been built in the late 70's with a very strange layout designed for an open learning system. The idea had been to have a few large lecture halls and meeting rooms for a few lectures a day and then the campus would be open for students to come and go and touch base with teachers during office hours for any help or clarification.

It was actually quite college like except that they learned very early on that teens between the ages of 14 and 18 were not really responsible enough to really learn well in such a setting. It was at this point that they erected temporary walls to separate classrooms and create a more traditional space that were never replaced with anything more permenant. It was not very soundproof though and led to a strange labyrinth of classrooms that required passing through the back of one classroom to reach the door to another classroom. This made things very interesting since the lunchroom was not large enough to house the entire student body at one time leading to the creation of a strange lunch schedule that broke classes down into different sections ultimately leading to times when an entire class of students would be passing in and out of the back of a classroom already in progress on order to get to their next class. It seemed like quite a chaotic and strange setup.

I pulled into the large gravel parking lot for students trying to find a safe parking spot for my new prized possession while blasting my favorite CD on my newly installed stereo. The sound quality was really awesome…I suspected that they added extra speakers too and by the feel of the bass beat, I was guessing it included a massive subwoofer. Nearly every eye in the lot focused on my car as I pulled into a fairly safe looking spot that bordered a ditch so that there was only one side of my car in peril of being dinged. I could see some of the other students sharing conspiratory whispers and glances in my direction as I got out of the driver's side door and grabbed my book bag. Suddenly I was wishing that I were driving a slightly less showy car as I felt my cheeks heat. I wasn't really used to getting attention. I had thought I wanted it, but now I wasn't so sure.

Just as I was about ready to hop back in the car and speed off I heard a familiar voice yell my name from across the lot. I turned to see Lucas waving and walking toward me whistling in awe as he came.

"Now that's what I call a sweet ride!" he exclaimed as he got close enough that I could hear. "Who'd you kill for that sucker?" He asked while eyeing the paint job.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" I joked trying to hide my nerves. "Actually it was a present from my family this morning."

"This isn't original is it?"

"All that I know is what my brother told me this morning. I guess they found it somewhere in bad shape and decided to fix it up as a surprise for me. I've been in love with this car since the movie Gone in 60 Seconds came out."

"Wow…nice brothers."

"I think so. They spoil me being the baby and all." I added shrugging.

"So how fast did you get her on the way in to town? Please don't tell me you're a granny driver."

"Only if grannies drive 110." He raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I think I could have gone faster if I hadn't run out of road before I hit city limits."

He looked impressed. "Nice…you'll have to take me for a spin sometime"

My heart instantly shifted into turbo. I was almost sure he could hear it from where he was standing if he had been trying.

"Sure…anytime." I again tried to sound casual. "So, you going to hold up your end of the promise and introduce me to some other students today or are you going to drool over my car all day?"

He cast me a "do I have to" look and then smiled and said "Sure…lets go."

We walked slowly up the long sidewalk to the doors that opened into the sophomore hallway. The halls of the building basically formed a huge capital H shape.  
The crossbar of the "H" was the commons area where all of the tables were set up for lunch periods bisected the long halls into class halls. The freshmen and sophomores had the southern spurs while the juniors and seniors occupied the northern halls. All of the students who parked in the student lot had to come in the door into the sophomore hall. I felt sort of bad for the sophomores because every morning and afternoon not only did they have to fight their own classmates to get to their lockers, but the all of the rest of the students who drove to and from school every day as well.

I observed that Lucas was a bit of a gentleman as we made our way toward the door. He offered to carry my book bag, which I insisted wasn't too heavy, but thanked him for the offer, and made sure to hold open the door for me when we arrived. My brothers were always doing chivalrous things for me…but I wasn't accustomed to letting anybody else do such things for me. Of course, I wasn't used to human people doing anything for me at all…this was my first taste of what it felt like to not be invisible at school and I was beginning to like it, even if it did embarrass me a bit.

Lucas led me directly to junior hall saying hi to a couple of people along the way, introducing me casually as we went. I realized right away that it would take me a while before I would really remember any of these names and hoped they would forgive me if I forgot later. He led me right to my locker and waited patiently while I unloaded the notebooks from my backpack and started trying to organize my locker. I had brought some pictures and things to decorate it, but I wouldn't mess with doing that while he was waiting and thought I might stay a little after school to decorate.

When I was done getting settled he led me to a table of kids in the common area and began to introduce me. As the discussions continued I realized that this must be his core group of friends. I immediately recognized Travis from the beach and learned his last name was Gordon. His face was one that I wasn't likely to forget anytime soon. Travis's girlfriend Amy Sawyer sat next to him. Amy looked like she would get along very well with Rose and Alice. She dressed head to toe in designer clothes, her hair done perfectly, but unlike my sisters she had a superior attitude to go along with the look. She eyed me taking in my clothes with a look in her eye that seemed like she was summing me up trying to decide if I would be a rival or not. Either way, I suspected that we weren't going to be fast friends anytime soon.

I was introduced to several other similarly dressed teens all meeting my gaze with similar expressions. Marc (with a "c" as he so curtly added) Weller, Danya Kosovich, Eliza Williams, Jordan Conners, Connor Cusak, Tristan Donovan, they all ran together as an indistinct blur of like-minded and dressed sheep.

There were only two unique members of the group other than Lucas. Malia St. John was a small brunette girl with auburn streaks, kind hazel eyes, and a sweet demure smile, and her boyfriend Riley Davies, a tall slender boy with sandy blonde hair and powder blue eyes. They were both dressed less stylish than the rest and also seemed the most genuine. I found myself confused as to why they were seated with the group until I realized after listening to the conversations for a while that Riley was actually Lucas's twin brother. I guess I would have figured that out sooner if I had known Lucas's last name.

They weren't identical, but after I put the pieces together I could see where they were definitely related. While Lucas was more muscular and had sharper features in his face, there was a general resemblance there, but more than that, their true likeness was found in their facial expressions and mannerisms. Lucas, however, seemed to be a rather big deal in this school and was extremely popular. I wondered if he was some kind of jock or something in order to warrant his own flock of groupies, which the band of sheep appeared to be. As I watched the twins interact I realized that they were actually very close and Lucas preferred Riley's company to most others. Suddenly it was clear, it wasn't Malia and Riley who were encroaching on this table of snobby elitists, but rather the elitists crowding them in order to be near Lucas.

I'm sure the way I looked this morning, the outside observer would have determined that I was a part of the snot squad…my apparel definitely would have made it appear as such, but I really found myself enjoying talking with Malia while Lucas excitedly told his twin about my car. Malia and I had a lot in common. We were both the youngest in a fairly large family and were a bit overprotected by our siblings. We had similar tastes in music and books, and were both really looking forward to the release of our favorite book adaptation to the big screen.

I was enjoying myself so much that I was caught quite off guard by the first warning bell reminding us that we had four minutes to get to class. I didn't have any of my new friends in my first class so I made my way to my AP American Lit class on my own following the directions Lucas gave me before I left the commons. I didn't really mind having lit first thing in the morning. It was way better than having something more science or math based first thing. Besides the fact that I really struggled a lot more with math related subjects, it was even harder to focus on them early in the morning.

I made my way to the English department, which was one of those departments with the less than accommodating classroom setups. In order to reach my classroom full of new faces from the junior class, I had to walk through another classroom full of new senior class faces. I once again felt the heat flood my face as I felt the whole class stare in my direction as I walked down the side of the room to the door of my own class. I entered to a new room full of inquisitive faces and quickly made my way to an empty seat near the back of the room along the temporary wall that separated this classroom from the one I just passed through.

The girl sitting in front of me turned around immediately smiling and introduced herself. "Hi new girl, I'm Leighton, Leighton Donnelly."

Leighton had a very laid back persona. She was a beautiful girl with chestnut hair similar to the color of my own and soft blue eyes. She seemed really comfortable in her own skin and not really worried about what others thought of her. She lounged back sideways in her chair leaning her head against the wall and stretching her legs across the aisle and that's when I noticed her clothes. She was wearing a t-shirt for the same movie that Malia and I had been discussing under a blue men's flannel shirt that was about three times too large for her average sized frame and a pair of old faded blue jeans with quotes from the book that the movie was adapted from written all over them in black permanent marker. It was that moment that I realized that I was probably going to really like Leighton Donnelly.

"Hi," I smiled back, "Nice jeans! I'm Angelina Cullen, but everyone calls me Lina."

"Oh, you're the new doc's kid right? Luke was telling me about beaning you with a Frisbee last week at the beach."

"Yep…that'd be me" I said rubbing the back of my head absentmindedly when reminded of the uncomfortable mishap.

"Yeah, he felt pretty bad about that."

It was then that the class started, but before I got wrapped up with getting a feel for my new teacher Mrs. Marshall, I made a mental note that Leighton seemed pretty cool and I definitely needed to get to know her better. Mrs. Marshall was a short, very skinny woman in her mid forties I would guess with fairly fluffy shoulder length raven hair. She wore a large barrette that is typically used to hold up large portions of hair, except she wore it holding up a small portion of her hair on one side right behind her ear. The strange little sprite of a woman bounced as she walked and seemed to bound endlessly around the room the entire hour like a Chihuahua on espresso. It was definitely going to be a chore to actually focus on her lectures this year.

Class seemed to last an eternity as I struggled to focus on what the little caffeinated Mexican jumping bean was telling us and the bell marking the end of the hour was a desperately welcomed sound. As I got up to gather my things Leighton asked what my next class was and offered to walk me there since it was near hers. Normally I would have been disappointed to have Trigonometry so early in the morning, but after the chaos of my first hour class, I was actually looking forward to the structure that a boring math class would provide.

The rest of my morning consisted of fairly normal teachers in both Trig and Sociology. I did have a couple of members of the snot squad in these other classes, but they seemed a little more at ease with me on their own than they were in the commons. Connor sat next to me in Trig, and turned out to be a basically decent guy. He wasn't as tall as Lucas and the rest of the guys I had met this morning, but was still a few inches taller than myself. He had thick black hair that had just enough of a wave to it to be interesting without the use of a ton of product. He had piercing blue eyes and the cutest dimple in his left cheek when he smiled. Away from the crowd of sheep, he seemed a little more original that he had during our initial meeting and I was left feeling kind of bad for dismissing him so quickly. I made a mental note that it might be prudent for me to reevaluate the whole group.

In Sociology I walked in to see four faces that I already knew. Seated side by side in the back of the room were Eliza, Tristan, Lucas, and Leighton. I smiled and headed toward the seat right in front of Leighton. Eliza and Tristan nodded at me in polite recognition as Lucas started up the conversation.

I don't know why it surprised me when Lucas put his arm around Leighton at first. I guess it's because she looked so different from the rest of the people that he seemed to spend his time with, but it didn't take long for everything to click. He liked unique people…and Leighton definitely fit that description, as did I.

"Hey Lina! I heard you met my girl here this morning." He beamed placing an affectionate kiss on her right cheek.

Ah, so that's why she heard about me and the Frisbee incident…Lucas and Leighton were a couple. I knew that he probably wasn't single…he was way too hot for that. I was just really glad to see that he wasn't the typical jock type to date the prissy girl. They made a really great looking couple. Great…another epic couple in my life…just what I needed. OH well, at least they were nice and were including me. That was more than I'd ever had before; this was the start to a good year!


	8. Chapter 8

**8. Let the 20 Questions begin….**

The first lunch period of the day included our entire Sociology class, so Lucas, Leighton, Eliza, Tristan, and I all made our way to the commons. We didn't bother stopping by our lockers, so we were one of the first ones there to claim a table with our belongings and get in line. They had a fairly nice selection of foods to choose from. I took pizza, salad, an apple, a brownie, and lemonade, paid for my purchases, and followed Leighton back to our table. A little later we were joined by Riley and Malia, who to my great pleasure were also part of this lunch period.

It appeared that Malia and Leighton liked me as much as I liked them since I ended up seated between the two of them with the twins on either side of them. I was pleased that I was making friends, but also nervous about the game of 20 questions I was about to endure.

"So, Lina, what's the story with your family?" Leighton asked with genuine interest. "Luke tried to explain but it seemed really confusing."

"Yeah, it is I guess for someone who hasn't lived it themselves. My parents died in a plane crash when I was young, so my sister's new mother and father in law adopted me since I didn't have any other family. They have very soft hearts and can't seem to turn away kids in need. Besides me, they have also adopted my oldest brother Emmett, my sister Alice, my brother Edward (who is the one my biological sister married making things sound a lot weirder than they really are), and my sister Nessie."

Oh if they only knew exactly how confusing the Nessie part was it really would leave their heads spinning…but I wasn't even going to hint at that one! "They're all a bit older than I am and are in college now, and they're all paired off and/or married. Emmett is with Rosalie, Alice is with Jasper, Edward is with my sis Bella, and Nessie is with Jacob and instead of going into all of the in-law or boyfriend stuff I just call them all my brothers and sisters because really I feel that way anyway."

"Wow!" Malia exclaimed. "And I thought it was difficult being the youngest of 5!"

"It's nice most days to have them all around, but it gets crowded and yet occasionally really lonely with them being all coupled off…especially on Valentine's Day."

"So you don't have a boyfriend or anything then?" Leighton asked with a scheming tone in her voice.

"Nope, never have."

"Never?" Both girls squeaked in genuine surprise. "How is that even possible?" Leighton continued completely flabbergasted.

"Just never been asked…or even noticed before for that matter…" I mumbled letting my thought trail off.

"Well, I don't believe that for a minute. Sure your brothers weren't running off any guys interested in your last school or something?" Leighton continued

I cringed a little trying to figure out what to say. That wasn't totally untrue, but not really the case either…at least not intentionally. "Maybe, they're pretty big guys and I guess they can seem a bit intimidating, but I don't think they did it on purpose. Also we moved around a lot. My father is part of doctors without borders" this was our official story to explain our frequent moves "…but we're planning on staying here until I get out of high school."

"Well sweetie," Malia added with a flick of her wrist and eyeing the guys around the room who seemed to glance away as I looked up, "I don't think you'll have a problem this year. You have no big brothers to barricade for you and there's already plenty of interest in this room."

I could feel my face turn crimson as she finished her sentence. I found it hard to believe that she could be right. I had gotten a lot of stares today, but it was just new kid curiosity right? I was getting uncomfortable with the course of the conversation and decided to change the subject.

"Okay, well, enough discussing my lack of social past. I want to know more about this school. Are there any fun extra curricular things I should look into? I'd really like to get involved. I've never really gotten to take a real active part in high school before with all of the moving around."

"Cheerleading" Eliza piped up from across the table. I was shocked. I didn't even think she had been listening at all.

"Hmm…" I contemplated. "I've never really seen myself as a cheerleader type before. I'm not sure I'm really peppy enough, but I appreciate the suggestion."

She gave me a weak smile in response and returned to eating her salad. I'd hoped I didn't sound snotty in my response, but I really couldn't see myself running around the basketball court with a huge plastered on smile trying to get a room of people to cheer louder. I tended to be a "wear the corresponding face with the corresponding emotion" type of girl and wasn't sure I could bear to be smiley all the time even when I didn't feel like it. I did more than enough of that at home trying to spare my family's feelings.

"How do you feel about plays?" Riley asked from the left side of Malia.

"Ooohh…now that sounds like fun. Maybe I could work as a stagehand or something at the very least. Do you know what show they're doing next?"

"It's musical time and this year Mrs. Johnson has chosen Grease."

My mouth dropped open in surprise. Grease was one of my favorite musicals. "Awesome! I love Grease! What will I need to do to join up?"

"Auditions start tomorrow after school and Mrs. J insists that everyone try out if they want to have any part of the show at all."

"I'll have to make sure my parents don't mind, but if they're cool then I'm in!"

"Sweet!" Malia exclaimed. "Maybe we'll all get in. Leighton, Lucas, and I typically work on the school plays too."

I smiled contentedly. It was my first day and I'd already found a group of friends that I not only liked, but I shared my interests with. Alice could probably tell me right now if I get to be part of the play if I called her, but I decided I wasn't going to cheat. I was going to do this the human way, and most other students wouldn't know their chances and neither would I.


	9. Chapter 9

**9. Of All The Luck…**

The rest of my school day was fairly uneventful. After lunch I had Anatomy, which I had a feeling I was going to enjoy with a former EMT teaching the class. It was going to be a lot more hands on learning than I had originally anticipated which left me excited. My father was of course a doctor and a couple of my siblings had studied medicine over the years and I thought I might consider going that direction after school myself. My only stumbling block would be my dislike for mathematics, which are a very important part of medicine.

Anatomy was followed by American History, Study Hall, and finally Phys Ed. I was grateful that PE fell at the end of the day so I wouldn't have to spend any more time at school after PE…I could just go home and shower and not worry about being sweaty or smelly. I know I was strange for liking PE, but it was nice to compete with individuals with whom I had any chance of actually keeping up with or possibly even beating.

As I walked into the locker room I was pleased to see that my new gal pals were in this hour also. I met the female teachers and found that I had to place an order for a uniform since she didn't have any in my size on hand. She allowed me to wear my own gym clothes I had brought for class until my uniform arrived.

I walked out to the gym with the girls to find that Lucas, Riley, and the rest of the snot squad boys were in our class as well. Connor looked up at me and smiled shyly flashing that left dimple at me when he caught me looking in his direction. My breath caught in my chest for a second as my heart sped up a couple of paces and I smiled back at him with a small wave in his direction. He was even cuter than I had realized in Trig. How is it that every time I see this boy he seems cuter and cuter? I found myself wondering if he would be trying out for the play too.

Class went by relatively slowly. It was really ridiculous that we had to dress in gym clothes for the day since we didn't do anything physical at all…we just sat the whole hour listening to rules and being arranged into rows to facilitate quick attendance taking. Initially I was glad that these spots would be our permanent spots for the rest of the year because they placed us in alphabetical order so I was in front of Conner, and in the next row Riley was right next to me with Lucas in front of him and Leighton behind him. The only bummer was Malia stuck on the far side of the class since her last name began with an "S" near where Marc was seated.

Of course my pleasure was short lived when the realization hit me while the teacher was talking that these weren't only our places for attendance, but we stood in these spots for calisthenics. Wonderful, the cute boy will have a daily view of my large unattractive butt all year while I was forced to bend and stretch in awkward positions! Just what I needed!

_Okay, well maybe I could turn so that my back end faces towards a wall or something during cals. Maybe then I won't have to die of embarrassment every day!_ I thought to myself as the teacher continued to drone on. _Okay, this might just work._ I attempted to convince myself in order to stave off a panic attack.

After 40 minutes of lectures on how to properly care for the facility and equipment we were finally free to go back to the locker room and change. I hadn't even made it to the locker room doors before Leighton and Malia caught up with me.

"So….Connor Cusak huh?" Leighton casually teased.

"What?" I innocently responded

"Yeah, yeah, don't play all coy with me new girl. I saw the look you two exchanged. So when did you two get all chummy?"

"Oh, we had Trig together this morning, but we didn't really talk much or anything. He just said hi and told me that Mr. Morgan was one of the easiest math teachers in the school so I shouldn't worry or anything."

"Wow Lina, he must have thought you were cute. Connor is pretty shy around new people, so that was like a major step for him!" Malia exclaimed.

I blushed a little and continued in to the locker room. I never would have guessed that such an innocent conversation would ever mean anything as big as he LIKED me. At the best I had thought he was just trying to be a little nicer after the slightly chilly reception I had received from his group of friends that morning.

"Yeah, most people take his lack of talking as him being snobby, but he's just actually pretty shy. The only reason why the rest of the kids you saw him sitting with this morning hang out with him is because his family is pretty well off." Leighton said matter of factly.

I felt really bad now for the way I had lumped him in with the rest of the sheep this morning. Thinking back, his expression had been different than the others. He seemed less like he was summing me up negatively than more simply interested. I would have to make an effort to start a conversation with him the next time I saw him. He might be shy, but I really wasn't.

When the final bell rang for the day I slowly made my way to my locker. I was in no rush to leave since I planned to take a bit of time to decorate my locker before heading home. The halls emptied quickly leaving just a few other students who appeared to have the same idea and a few teachers left meandering the halls. From the expressions on their faces, the first day was as exhausting for them as it was for their students.

I took my time putting up a magnetic mirror, various pictures of my parents and siblings, and installed a little plastic shelf to give me a little more storage space since the big locker only had one small shelf at the very top. The only thing missing was a picture of my new car to add to the mix and I would be all set. I organized by books and notebooks on the shelves separating my morning and afternoon books to make it easier to grab and run and left my book bag in my locker since I had no need for it tonight since there was no homework yet and headed down toward sophomore hall.

I was halfway down the hall headed toward the door the led to the parking lot when I was met by Lucas and Riley.

"There you are!" Lucas said pointing in my direction. "We've been waiting 20 minutes to get a better look at your car. What kept ya?"

"Oh, sorry, I totally forgot I promised you guys that. I stuck around to decorate my locker and get it organized."  
"Ugh…girls. Why do you guys always have to fancy everything up?" Riley commented making a sour face.

"I wouldn't say I "fancied" anything up…I just installed another shelf and threw a magnetic mirror in and taped up a few pics of my family just make it a little more me."

"That's cool I guess." Lucas admitted. "So now are _you_ going to hold up your end of the bargain now or what?"

"Sure, sure…but we can't take too long. My family's going to be wondering where I'm at."

We walked out to the car and I stood by as they investigated the engine discussing torque and horsepower with great enthusiasm. They kept commenting on what an awesome job my brothers had done restoring the car and that some of the parts must have been custom ordered to make it look so authentic. Edward was right, nobody would ever believe that I could possibly be driving an original Shelby. I caught sight of a shiny silver Volvo in the corner of my eye and knew that I didn't have to worry about my family worrying about me anymore because Edward would call and update them for me. I threw out a thought explaining that the guys wanted to check out the car and I'd be home soon for him to intercept and returned my attention to listening to my new friends.

Finally after 15 minutes of oohing and aahing I told Riley and Lucas that I really had to be getting home and didn't have time to give them their promised ride, but they would definitely get to ride sometime soon. They stood around long enough to listen to the engine as I cranked the starter and it roared to life. They whooped and hollered as I threw it in reverse and backed quickly out of my spot and then tossed it into first gear and gunned the engine doing a repeat performance of my departure from the front lawn this morning and made my way toward home. I had the sneaking suspicion that the whole family would be nearby to hear a blow by blow of my first day of school. I was glad to have good things to share and I hoped that they would be encouraged that they made the right decision.


	10. Chapter 10

**10. Without a Net…Well, Almost**

I decided to push my car again just to see if I could get any more speed out of it on my way home. I was a little more accustomed to the way it handled, so I was a little less cautious. I had just hit 122 miles per hour when my cell phone rang. I hit the button to answer with speakerphone just in time to hear Alice say, "Break now! There's a cop around the next curve!"

I slammed on my breaks spinning the car a full 180 degrees and straightened out my wheel to travel in the opposite direction that I had been headed. By the time I had realigned my wheels I was going to a very respectable 50 miles per hour. I was sure that the officer had heard the squeal of my tires and would be heading in my direction to investigate so I took the first road I could turn on and kept my speed nice and steady until I found a private drive the led into the woods and turned in driving up past the bend so that I would be out of sight of the road and stopped the car.

"Holy crap! Thanks Alice! Whew…that was close. I'm going to have to be more careful."

"Yes you do Lina. That would be pretty sucky to get such a nice car and then lose your license in the same day."

"I know, I know. I was just getting a feel for her though. Who would have ever thought a cop would be way out here. We never see them out this way!"

"You okay now? I could hear your heart pounding through the phone like a bass drum. You should be able to get back on the road and head this way in a couple more minutes by the way."

"Thanks" I sighed, still shaking from the close call. "I wonder how much tire I lost back there…" I could still smell the sickening smell of extremely hot rubber.

"Well while we wait…I see you're going to be in a play?"

"Stop right there, don't tell me any more. I don't want to know…I'll wait just like any other human." I said and then after a short pause quickly added, "So I'm in the play? NO! Wait! Never mind…just forget about it until after the casting list comes out okay? Then you can tell me all about it."

She giggled on the other line and then added, "So I guess that Connor is off the discussion menu as well?"

"Ugh…yeah…I think he should be. If I want to get a taste for human life then I need to go into it without a safety net, right?"

"Does that mean no more cop warnings too?"

"No Way! The second I'm off school property I'm back to vampire rules, okay?"

"Gotcha…no school related visions only…but how do you feel about dates? They don't take place on school grounds."

"Cheater!" I was really struggling to resist the urge to find out though. "You know you're making this hard on me right?"

She giggled her little tinkling chuckle again. "You're safe to head back home now. I'll see you in a few."

"Okay Alice, and thanks again…." Then I threw on a mumbled "cheater!" before pressing end and throwing the car into reverse and cautiously backing my way out of the driveway.

I pulled back out onto the main road and slowly made my way back to the house. Driving so much slower than usual made me appreciate the annoyance my siblings felt while riding with me, even while traveling at over 90 miles per hour. I was traveling 55, but it felt like I was practically crawling. Just as I was driving past my black skid marks on the road left from my hasty reversal, I saw Emmett pop out of the woods running next to the car mocking me. I stuck my tongue out at him and yelled out the window that Alice said cops were out so I had to be good or else I'd be smoking his sorry butt. He laughed again and jumped back into the underbrush.

Two minutes later I was pulling onto the long lane that led back to our home in the woods. As soon as I was on our own property I mashed the gas again getting up to 75 before having to let off and slow down for my approach to the garage. I had seen when I got in the car after school that someone had left me my very own garage door opener with a note in handwriting I recognized immediately as Edward's that said "Use me when you get home, and be careful getting there!" I depressed the button on the door opener and watched as the doors to the far left stall slowly opened to reveal a parking space reserved especially for me. I slowly guided my precious baby into her protective space and got out carefully closing the door behind me. I stood there a second admiring the object of my adoration before finally giving in knowing my family was waiting for me and left the garage depressing the button on the remote and closing the large door before I left.

By the time I walked into the back door, my family had already assembled at the large dining room table waiting for a report. They all smiled at me as I stepped into the dining room. I saw that in the middle of the table was a large tray of cookies and a tall glass of milk waiting for me. This had been the first day of school tradition with my family since kindergarten. Granted Jacob and I were the only ones to partake of the buffet, but it was still a very comforting tradition. I sat down in the empty seat and grabbed a couple of cookies and the glass of cool milk taking a long satisfying drink before starting.

"Okay, so what are you guys wanting to hear?"

"Just about your day in general dear. How did it go?" My mom asked lovingly.

"Like you haven't already gotten a play by play from Alice and Edward?" I teased throwing a sarcastic half smile in their direction.

"Seriously though," I continued, "it was a really good day. I made some friends, learned my way around school, got to show off my car…all in all it was pretty fun. My classes don't seem like they'll be too terribly rough. The math might be tricky and I might have a hard time paying attention in my lit class thanks to my teacher being a bit…um…energetic I guess would be the right word." Edward and Alice giggled, having seen first hand exactly what I was trying to avoid saying. After all I had been raised that if I didn't have something nice to say then I shouldn't say anything at all.

"Oh, and I think I'm really going to enjoy Anatomy, Dad. The teacher is a former EMT and it sounds like he's going to have a lot of hands on projects and opportunities in there. I'm really looking forward to that one for sure!"

My Dad looked at me smiling widely. I could tell it made him very happy to see me so interested in the medical field.

"Um what else?" I continued. "I'm guessing Alice mentioned that as long as you guys don't mind I have decided I want to try out for the school play. She's not allowed to tell me anything about it though. I don't want to have a safety net. Anyway, they're doing Grease and auditions start tomorrow after school. Would you guys mind at all if I tried out?"

My family all smiled knowingly. Alice might not be able to tell me, but she had definitely blabbed to all of them. "Of course dear." My mom said confidently. "We want you to be involved in as many high school events as you would like."

"So what exactly is wrong with Cheerleading anyway?" Rosalie piped up from the end of the table. I guess either Edward or Alice had experienced that conversation at some point and shared that I had turned down the offer.

"Nothing's wrong with it Rose, I just don't think it's me. Honestly, can you see ME running around in those little skirts and tank tops with pom poms yelling 'Rah, Rah'? I have no doubt that you enjoyed it when you were in school, but can you honestly say that it fits my personality?"

"Yeah, I guess not, but you would look so cute in the uniform and we could paint the a maroon and gold "P" on your face for games in honor of the Pirates mascot and put your hair in a cute curly ponytail."

"Rosalie, I can't be a cheerleader just so you can dress me up! I'm not a Barbie to play with you know!" I said laughing at her overzealous enthusiasm.

"I know," she said pouting, "but you'd still look cute!"

I patted her on the arm as I got up and walked to the kitchen to get a refill of milk. I guess my sibling knew that they probably weren't getting much more out of me because by the time I got back the only one left sitting there was Edward. He was reading another classic quietly at the head of the table when I came up to sit next to him with my elbows on the table resting my head on my fists.

"I thought you were going to work without a safety net," he stated quietly still staring at the pages of the book in front of him.

_I just want to cheat a little, _I said to him in my mind. _I just want to know if my instincts about the people I met today were correct._

"You have very good instincts, Lina. Listen to them." He answered looking me in the eyes.

_So the ones I think are decent are okay? And I should be wary of Amy right?_

He nodded with a look of tension on his face. I could tell that the things he heard in Amy's head today were probably pretty vicious for him to be feeling this protective of me. He was resisting the urge to step in with all of his self-control.

_What about Connor?_

"Your friends are right, he's very shy…but his thoughts seem pretty considerate and kind and he does have an interest in you."

_Okay…we should probably stop there. I don't want to spoil anything with too much info. Thanks Edward._

I got up to leave, but he caught my hand before I was out of reach and looked up at me with a softer expression on his face. "Do me a favor? Give the caffeinated Mexican jumping bean a break okay? She's got a lot going on in her life. Her marriage is in a rough spot and her son has been diagnosed with ADHD and has been giving her a ton of trouble. The to top it all off they are having some money trouble. She deserves some compassion."

_Oh wow…okay. I will._ I responded taken aback by his request. It had never occurred to me that the little strange sprite like teacher might have something like that going on in her life. I went up to my room and lay down on my bed absorbing the events of the day. The faces of all of my new friends flashed in my head as I sighed contentedly. I was making friends; I was making my own way without my siblings hovering over me. It felt good. Then suddenly the adorable dimpled face of Connor Cusak flashed in my mind and I remembered what Alice said about dates and a tingle ran up my spine. I giggled out loud and then quickly stifled it remembering that any family inside the house would be hearing everything I was doing right now and no longer caring if they heard me or not, I rolled over burying my face in my pillow as I squealed and kicked my legs in excitement like the teenager I really was.


	11. Chapter 11

**11. I Am A Tree…**

My second day of school went just as well as my first. I spent lunchtime getting to know my new friends better and the better part of the day looking forward to the first night of auditions after school. I was more excited than ever when I found out during Trig that Connor was also planning on auditioning for the musical as well.

When the last bell of the day rang I practically ran to my locker and then to the auditorium where the auditions were being held. To my surprise, I wasn't the first one there. A dozen students had already taken seats in the front rows and began looking through the copies of the script pages that we would be working with. I picked up a packet thumbing through the pages of scenes and putting the necklace with a large cardboard square with the number 13 written on it to wear during auditions around my neck. There were three different scenes that would be used for auditions. The first was the closing scene at the carnival when Sandy's sexy side is revealed. The second is during the Pink Ladies slumber party. The third was the Grease lightening scene in the shop for the boys. From looking at the choices I was guessing that we would be auditioning in small groups using the girls only and boys only scenes and then have call backs testing out different couplings of the ones chosen to find the right people for each part.

The room filled to capacity quickly and I barely had enough time to flip through the pages when the teacher called the meeting to order. I was impressed at how many students were so eager to be part of the production. With this kind of competition I figured I'd be lucky to even be allowed to work backstage. "Mrs. J" as she immediately informed us she preferred to be called was a woman of average height with leathery looking skin who appeared to be in her mid fifties with fake blonde hair and a very harsh voice which she tried to mask by the use of sweetie, honey, and sugar at the beginning of every third sentence. Connor and Riley later told me that this is something she picked up from her time in New York. She had once been a halfway decent performer on Broadway, but when she started getting too old to play the roles that she was type cast into she went into teaching.

Mrs. J made it quite clear that the second we walked through the doors we were being critiqued and she expected us to give 110% in everything we did this week. The first round of cuts would begin tonight and I was suddenly very nervous about being there. Then she made us all rise and take part in warm ups. I tried hard not to laugh as I glanced around the room at the sight of over 200 sets of arms waving the air as my fellow students and I all attempted to be trees in the wind.

After we had a few more strange vocal warm ups and stretching exercises, the teacher split us up into small groups and sent us into the commons area to participate in some basic dramatic warm up games involving pantomime and gesturing, all the while wandering around with a group of five other past students making marks on a clip board as she evaluated us. I was in a group with Riley, Connor, Lucas, Malia, and Leighton, and we were having a little bit too much fun with our exercises. I happed to look up toward the far end of the room to see Mrs. J frowning in our direction and then looking down abruptly taking rapid notes on her clip board. I was hoping that we weren't in trouble for enjoying the activity…but if this wasn't going to be fun for us then what was the point?

The next part of the evening's activities involved some improv work in our small groups using topics that were provided on a sheet of paper. Some of the items on the list were related to the story line while others were not. The process of this game consisted of the teacher telling us how many were needed for a scene and then giving us 30 seconds to choose who would be up. After we had chosen the participants of the scene she would announce the topic number that we were supposed to perform. This ended up being a riot too because there were times that we would have two girls up and the scene called out would be for two boys, or even worse a loving couple or vice versa.

I was having so much fun that I was really surprised when she blew the whistle that indicated the auditions were over for the day before we had ever even done a single thing from the play itself. She made a quick announcement reminding us not to lose our number since it would be ours for the duration of the auditions and to pick up a copy of the songs that we would have to sing the next day if we were chosen to come back. There was to be a list of numbers of the individuals that had survived the first night's cuts posted when we arrived at school first thing in the morning. This time there were four songs in the pile that we were given. They were the songs that corresponded to the scenes that were in the packets we had picked up when we arrived, plus one of Danny's balads. I was feeling nervous already as I took the papers wondering if Edward would help me practice tonight…and hoping desperately that we wouldn't have to sing in front of all the rest of our competitors.

Connor was behind me in line and walked with me out to my car. He whistled as we approached the driver's side door.

"I'd heard rumors about this car, but I hadn't seen it myself yet. She's a beaut!"

"Thanks." I said blushing. "My big brothers are car buffs and they tend to spoil me being the youngest. I was really excited when they gave it to me yesterday. It's the only car I've ever really lusted over!"

"Well, you have good taste; it's a fully lust-worthy car for sure."

I smiled and nodded in agreement. Connor bid me goodnight and turned to walk toward his car as I slid behind the driver's seat. I pulled carefully out of the parking lot and made my way back toward home. This was my first time driving my new car in the dark and while I did tend to speed in the daytime, my night vision was just as weak as any regular human, so I took my time and drove very cautiously.

As I walked in the back door I could hear the piano music floating in from the front room. Either Edward had been listening to my thoughts when I got the music or Alice had seen me auditioning in a vision because Edward was already playing one of the two pieces that I was going to ask him to go over with me. I thanked him in my thoughts as I made my way to the front room that housed the piano and started singing the words to the song. My voice was a little shaky and unsure the first time through. While I loved the musical, I had never tried to sing any of them solo for anything more than fun…but this time I was not only focused on having fun with the words, but also what actions or motions I would need to be making during the singing. By the third time through I asked Edward if he thought my ideas would work well and he said that he thought that they would be just right and that I had improved a great deal after so little practice. We also practiced the duet song with Edward filling in the male lead vocals. That went well too and I actually felt more comfortable with that song than I had the first.

By the time we had finished practicing and I ate a little dinner it was really late. I was really grateful that I had study hall toward the end of the day after all of my classes because it had allowed me to get almost all of my homework assigned that morning done so I didn't have to worry about it. I only had one assignment left, which was to read a few chapters from _The Scarlet Letter _which I had read so many times that I already knew the story; I just needed to refresh the details of the particular chapters in order to accurately discuss them in class the next day. It was five minutes past one when I was finally able to drift off the sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

**12. Free To Be Somebody Else**

I awoke the next morning with a start. _It is unusually bright out for so early in the morning._ I thought to myself and then my eyes drifted to my alarm clock and I realized I had slept in. I jumped out of bed cursing at myself for not making sure my alarm was set right. I wasn't late yet, but it was going to be really close.

I jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom. I cleaned up quickly as I brushed my teeth and hair simultaneously. I threw my hair in a quick ponytail and grabbed my makeup bag to throw in my book bag and ran back to my room. I grabbed the first halfway matching outfit I could find and threw on my closest pair of tennis shoes. I picked up my jacket and my bag that I had luckily packed the night before and sprinted downstairs to the kitchen to grab a pop tart and soda to eat on my way to school.

I said "Hi…I'm running late….bye!" to my family as I ran past them out the back door and to the garage smashing the button furiously hoping to not lose a second waiting for the garage door to open. I hopped in the car and hurriedly threw the car in reverse to leave the garage and then slammed it into first while pushing the button to close the garage door and gunned the engine, speed shifting my way up the long lane to the main road. I was hoping against hope that the road was cop free as I raced toward school as fast as my new ride would take me.

I ran into the building and to my locker just in time to hear the first warning bell ring. I walked into my American lit class with 10 seconds to spare and melted into my seat behind Leighton.

"That was close" she commented raising her eyebrows at me.

"Slept in…" I panted. "…was up too late between practicing for the songs, dinner, and reading the book for class today."

"Ah…so you didn't have time to check out the audition list this morning then?"

Oh, crud…I had forgotten all about it…but then again I knew Edward wouldn't have wasted his time last night practicing with me if I hadn't made the cut. Geesh…there were even more safety nets floating around that I had never even considered.

"Awe man…No I didn't, I was too worried about getting here to look. Do you know if I made it?"

"Yeah, I checked for all of our numbers first thing. We all made it." she said smiling and then turned to face the teacher who had already begun her first bounding trek to the chalk board.

"Thanks" I whispered back as I watched the teacher write several of characters names on the board while she explained that she wanted us to write a character study on each one while reading the book this coming week. While I had a hard time focusing on this small bouncy teacher, I had to admit that she really was a good teacher. She was excellent at creating new and different ways to look at the same old books that made you learn more from them than simply answering the same bland questions. I was grateful at the end of the hour that we were only left with reading one more chapter and beginning our character evaluations projects for the next class period. I was well enough acquainted with the characters that this was going to be easy to accomplish and I wouldn't need too terribly much time to get it done.

I coasted my way through the rest of the day, my nervousness steadily building as each hour passed by. When PE was over I took a few extra minutes to do my make up a little and attempt to look more presentable for auditions. I left my hair up in the ponytail though because it seemed more of an era appropriate style than my normal hairstyle would portray. I was glad that I had thought ahead the night before after practicing and had already packed a white pleated calf length skirt, plain shirt, white cardigan sweater, bobby socks, and a pair of keds to change into after PE in order to help myself embrace the characters better. No matter what part I was chosen for, if any, it would be a teenage girl from the 50's, so no matter who I ended up being cast for, it would be appropriate. The only exception would be one of the pink ladies, but I wasn't really ever going to get any of those roles anyway.

I got a lot of funny looks as I walked into the room. I could tell some of the others were making fun of me, but I didn't mind because I saw the reaction that Mrs. J had given when she saw me and the slight smile that played at the corner of her lips. I had made an impression, so that was good.

As I had feared, they made us all sing in front of the entire group of students that were gathered for this evening's auditions. Our numbers had been reduced by one third, but there were still a lot of faces out there! The teacher had us all come up in numerical order, so after cuts I was going to be the ninth person to perform. The butterflies that had invaded my stomach earlier in the day had grown immensely and were now beating furiously against my diaphragm as I got closer and closer to being up next. I took a deep breath trying to calm them, but it wasn't much help.

When the teacher called my number I thought my chest was going to explode with the pressure of the now super sized butterflies fighting to escape the chasm of my chest. I swallowed hard and then slowly walked to the center of the stage where we had been instructed to stand. Before we were to sing we were supposed to say a few short sentences about ourselves.

I cleared my throat as I began, trying my best to project and minimize the vibration in my voice that my sizzling nerves were creating. "My name is Angelina Cullen. I just moved here from Maine. I've never done any drama before, but I'm really hoping that you will allow me to be a part of this play in some shape or form. Thank you for letting me audition for you."

"Sweetie, I like your ambition. Nice showing of dedication." Mrs. J said aloud sweeping her hands in front of her in the direction of my clothes. They were the first words she had uttered since explaining the auditioning process. Her former students had done all the talking up to that point.

I stood in shock for a moment, surprised at her praise. "Thank you Mrs. J" I responded meekly and then stood dumbfounded for a moment.

"Well dear, what are you waiting for…an engraved invitation."

I shook my head a moment. "Sorry Ma'am." I bowed my head to center myself and then began. After a few notes I let go of the room full of people watching and embraced the song and for a moment I wasn't Lina Cullen, I was Sandy. It was freeing to be someone else. Someone so innocent whose problems seemed so easy and minor compared to the complications in my life. I swirled and glided back and forth across the stage enjoying the light weight on the shoulders of the young character I was playing. Then suddenly I was done. I stood blinking into the audience as a growing applause slowly worked its way through the crowd. Everyone else had gotten a soft polite showing of support…but this was different. I locked eyes with my friends who were all staring at me, eyes wide; obviously they hadn't expected the performance that they had just seen, as they clapped enthusiastically. I blushed brightly, thanked Mrs. J once again for the opportunity and rushed off stage. The applause followed me a few seconds and then faded as the next student took their place on stage.

I stood at the sink in the restroom a few minutes looking at myself in the mirror shaking. All of a sudden I was scared…scared of being a part of something so big and public…scared of being the center of attention even for that short moment in the auditorium. My whole life our family had struggled to be a part of the background; to not bring attention to ourselves in any way more than the mere presence of my siblings instigated. Yet here I was, on a stage in front of loads of people. _What if this is a mistake?_ I thought frantically. _What if I somehow bring unwelcome attention to my family?_ But at the same time…it felt good too.

Just then Leighton walked into the bathroom and found me looking extremely conflicted.

"Lina? Are you okay? What's wrong?"

I didn't know what to say. I couldn't tell her the whole truth. "I'm…I'm just not used to getting that kind of attention or anything. It feels weird."

"Well, you better get used to it Hon, after what I saw today…you're going to end up in this play sure as the world!"

I didn't know how to respond. I just stared at her with in surprise.

"Was I really that good? I was just enjoying myself. I never really thought I'd be _good."_

"Yes, you were, and if we don't get you back in there soon, Mrs. J is going to send a search party. She's looked back to see if you have come back in several times already."

"Okay, just give me one more sec?"

"Sure, I'll wait outside."

I stood looking in the mirror a bit longer. If this was wrong, then it was already too late. Everyone had seen me and if the teacher offered me a part and I turned it down, it would look even more suspicious. I had to go back in there and see what would happen next. I forced my feet to propel me forward, slowly emerging from the restroom to join Leighton in the hall. Leighton linked her arm in mine as we made our way back to the auditorium. Just before she opened the door she whispered to me, "Just Breathe," and shot me a smile of encouragement. I took a deep breath, squared my shoulders and stepped into the cavernous auditorium.


	13. Chapter 13

**13. So Much For Shy..**

I sat watching the rest of the auditions, but not really _seeing_ any other than those of my friends. They all did a wonderful job. Riley and Lucas were both very talented and well spoken on stage. They had great comedic timing. Connor had an amazing singing voice. His tone was so perfect it gave me chills. Leighton and Malia were hilarious. It was obvious from the way that they portrayed themselves on stage that they were seeking roles as members of the Pink Ladies. The most talented of all the ones I had seen that day weren't really my friends, but still acquaintances. Amy Sawyer and Danya Kosovich were the most beautiful and most gifted singers out of anyone that I had observed throughout that long night of auditions. I was certain that one of them would end up playing Sandy.

The night seemed to drag on forever before the last of the students had completed their audition. Mrs. J returned to the stage and complimented all of us on a job well done. She announced that we would find our fate once again the next morning. Thursday night we would just have a practice with final auditions Friday evening. The final cast list would be posted later that evening.

On my way to my car, I was stopped by several people I had never met before who told me that I had an excellent voice. I blushed deeper and gave a shy thank you every time someone new would come along. Just before I walked out the door I was stopped by Connor, who surprised me by putting his arm around my shoulders with a big smile.

"So, you've been holding out on us Ms. Lina! Why didn't you tell us you were destined for the big stage?"

I must have turned purple I was so embarrassed and also slightly excited by the physical contact. "Um…that would be because I'm not and I really didn't know anybody who would ever think I was…"

"Haven't you noticed yet Connor?" Lucas piped up from behind me. I jumped reflexively at the sound of his voice not realizing he was there. "Lina is compulsively modest and I'm guessing doesn't really believe in herself so very much." He said with a wink in my direction.

I dunked my head in embarrassment. I didn't know how to respond to things like this so I just walked along quietly. We must have been walking slower than I had realized because suddenly Amy and Travis passed us as Amy shot me the look of a thousand deaths. I guess she was feeling a bit threatened by what she had seen tonight as well. I wasn't sure why, but it seemed her nature to ignore everything except things she deemed a threat and when she found a threat, I guessed that she would strike out with all the force she could muster.

Amy's shriveling look bothered me for a few seconds, but then I realized that Connor was still walking with me and his arm was still draped over my shoulder. I looked up at him and smiled shyly.

"So, how much homework do you have tonight? Are you going to have to be up really late again?"

"Actually I got it all done in Study Hall…so no homework for me today….and that reminds me…before I go to sleep I really need to check my alarm clock. It almost made me late today. I felt really silly running around all day with no makeup and a barely matching outfit!"

"Oh, well, I didn't think you looked bad at all. You really don't need all that stuff you know. You look pretty enough without it." He added with a slight blush.

I looked up at him again through my lashes. For a purported shy guy, he sure was saying a lot of things that I never suspected would come out of his mouth. "Thank you" I finally managed to squeak out. My feelings were teetering somewhere between an embarrassed shyness and a thrill of excitement. The only time I had ever been this close to a guy before was with my brothers…this was different and it felt nice.

A couple of steps later we were almost to my car and he dropped his arm from around my shoulder and turned to look at me.

"Hey, I was wondering. Well, the twins and the girls are planning on doing a double date movie night thing Saturday night and said that if I could find someone to go with me we could make it a triple…so…um…would you be interested in going with me?"

I was so surprised by the invitation that I dropped my keys right out of my hands. I felt them hit my foot and bounce off into the grass, but I couldn't take my eyes away from Connor's. "You mean like a _real_ date?"

He shoved his hands in his pockets and shrugged his shoulders up around his neck. "Well, yeah. I mean, if you want to. If you're really not interested then don't feel like you have to say yes or anything."

"Oh No…I want to go. I'd _love_ to go. Um…I'll just have to ask my family for permission. To be honest I've never really dated before, so I'm sure they'll want to set up some sort of protocol." I added rolling my eyes.

He smiled and said that would be great and then broke his gaze from mine to spy my keys a foot away on the grass and bent down to pick them up. He put them in my hands and smiled at me again causing that adorable dimple to wink at me from his left cheek.

"Cool…then as long as you're parents are cool with it, then we'll call it a date."

"Okay, see you tomorrow…and thanks for asking."

"Thanks for saying yes." he said with a wink and then turned to go to his car.

I climbed into the driver's seat, turned on the radio, and pulled out of the parking lot. As soon as I was a little ways away from school I started to squeal. I had a date…my very first date. I couldn't believe it! Chills ran up and down my spine as I kept repeating over and over to myself. _Oh my gosh…I have a real date!_


	14. Chapter 14

**14. My Worst Nightmare **

I was practically floating as I made my way from the garage to the house that night. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get the dorky smile that stretched across my face to stay away for more than a couple of seconds. I walked in the back door expecting to face yet another family meeting, but to my surprise the dining room was empty. I was a little disappointed. I had thought for sure that Edward and/or Alice would have noticed the night's events and have everyone ready to discuss new policies regarding my love life…such as it was. I continued on through the kitchen and living room which were also completely empty, pulling my hair out of the ponytail and taking off the cardigan sweater as I walked.

Of course, the one night that I had news I wanted to share and actually wanted to figure things out so I could tell Connor the next day at school and there was nobody home to talk to. The house was eerily quiet as I made my way upstairs to my room. I shuddered unnerved at how quiet it was. My entire life with the Cullens I had NEVER been alone in the house. I began to worry that something was terribly wrong.

I opened my cell phone to take a peek to be sure I hadn't somehow missed a call or text message, but I hadn't. I slowly opened the door to my room, my intuition telling me that there could be danger and I needed to be cautious.

My room was empty too. I scanned the room looking for a note or anything that might hint as to what was going on, but there was nothing. Finally, no longer able to stand not knowing, I opened my cell phone and dialed Edward's cell number. The phone rang once, twice, three times…with every ring I became more and more tense. Vampires, with their lightening fast reflexes, always answered their phones by the second ring at the very latest. Finally on the fourth ring Edward's voice came on the line. I started to talk and then realized that it was his voicemail.

Panic grabbed hold of me as I listened to the message that I had never actually heard before because I had never been unable to get through when I tried to call. My heart pounded as I hung up and tried Alice's number. Voicemail. Bella…another voicemail. How many times in your life does your worst nightmare actually become reality? Mine was unfolding right before my very eyes! Tears were brimming in my eyes as I struggled to see the display in order to punch in my father's number. I was shaking uncontrollably as I lifted the receiver to my ear and listened unable to breathe. The ringing began…once, twice, three times…the tears began to flow down my face in rivers of salty moisture as I fell to my knees in the middle of my bedroom floor. Suddenly I felt completely alone and totally lost as to what to do. Just as my sobs became audible the ringing stopped and I could hear the voice of my father.

"Angelina?"

"Oh my God, Dad!" I practically screamed into the phone in my panic and also simultaneous relief of hearing his voice. "What is going on?!"

"Angelina, are you okay? What's wrong?"

"That's what I want to know? Where is everybody? Why are the rest of the family not answering their phones?"

"We've got a situation Lina, but we're taking care of it. Don't worry honey, everything is fine. We'll be home soon."

"Is everyone safe?"

"Yes, just stay inside and we will be home soon."

"Okay Dad…I love you," I said as my state of panic began to fade slightly into obsessive worry and dread.

"I love you too."

I crawled onto my bed and sat in the middle with my knees pulled up to my chest and rocked back and forth as I waited. Although it seemed like forever, it was actually only four minutes before the first of my family members started arriving back home. Edward was the first one in the door and ran straight up to my room. In one rapid second he had swung open the door and crossed the room and was next to me on the bed with his arms around my shoulders placing a kiss on my forehead and then laying his cheek on top of my head. Bella followed right behind him and stood on the other side of the bed with her hand softly stroking my hair.

"It's okay Lina…its okay. We're here now." He crooned to me as he rocked slowly back and forth with me.

"I was…I thought..." my voice cracked as we rocked rhythmically sobs pouring out of my throat choking me as I tried to catch my breath.

"I know, I know. I'm sorry honey." He could hear every thought running through my mind as I remembered the paralyzing fear I felt thinking that something had gone wrong and they were all gone, possibly forever.

"We would never leave you sweetie. I promise you." He continued looking into my eyes as the tears continued to flow down my face.

"Never!" Bella added with a determined look in her eye.

My terror was starting to fade as I sat there in Edward's arms listening to him hum the lullaby he had written for me right after I had joined the family. One of the many ways that Edward expresses his love for others is through music. Bella, Esme, Nessie, and I all have our own special tunes that he wrote for each one of us. He composed mine the first night after I had come to live with the Cullens. I cried the first full day and night I was in their care missing my mother desperately. Edward had been one of the few family members that I would allow to come near me or take care of me and I was only able to finally fall asleep that first night while in his arms as he hummed my song while rocking me in Esme's favorite antique rocking chair.

For some reason Edward, Jacob, and Nessie were the only family members who could soothe me in those first few days. Jacob was warm and cuddly and reminded me of the warm safe feeling of being in my father's arms. He felt familiar and normal and safe, while the rest of the family members were cold and hard and felt foreign to my soft skin. Nessie was still fairly young herself, appearing to be about 13 or 14 and was also warmer and slightly softer than the rest. Although I knew she wasn't like me either, she would use her communication skills to show me that I was safe with her and her family and would be loved which helped to put me at ease. I have never understood why Edward was the other family member I looked to for comfort, but most nights it was only he who could get me to sleep.

One would think I would have gravitated to Bella when I had come to stay with the family since I had heard so much about her from our mother and seen pictures, not that she looked quite the same by the time I came to live with them though. Her looks had changed quite a bit with her transformation from human to vampire, but she was still my sister. In looking back I think that I sensed reluctance on Bella's part at first as well. She was grieving over the death of our mother too, and it seemed as though it hurt her to look at me so I gave her space finding solace in the arms of the ones I felt most comfortable with.

I took a deep breath finally settling my vibrating body and turned to look up at Bella and then back to Edward. "Okay, I think I'm okay now." I said with a weak smile in an attempt to reassure them as I continued.

"What on earth is going on? I was scared to death when I couldn't reach any of you."

"Things got a bit tense today Lina," Edward began. "A nomad stumbled upon our scent this morning and followed it back to the house. He saw you leave for school this morning and followed you, curious about the human who lived so freely with vampires."

Numbness swept my body as the shock hit me. He had been so close as to see me go to my car and I never even knew he was there. If he'd wanted to kill me, I'd be dead right now having never even realized I was in danger. Why hadn't Alice seen this coming?

Edward read my thoughts and pulled his hand through my hair. "It's okay, he was just curious. He didn't mean you any harm…well at least not initially. Alice did see him coming, but didn't think he would arrive until around noon. He must have had a last minute change of plans that she somehow missed. But the second he saw you she saw what was happening and we all took chase to keep you safe."

"Okay…that was this morning then why were you guys still all gone 13 hours later? And why weren't you answering your phones?"

"Well, things got tricky. We found him and brought him back to the house to talk to him. He spent all day with us learning about our lifestyle and exploring the woods. It wasn't until the early evening that his plans changed after wandering in your room and began to lust for your scent. He wasn't aware of my or Alice's ability and while we continued to show him hospitality he was plotting to hunt you when you were alone…so we had to…take care of him."

I froze taking in the full implications of what he was trying to tell me. A nomad came to town, decided to hunt me, and had to be destroyed all for the sake of keeping me safe and all while I had no idea. Here I was up on stage pretending to be sweet little Sandy from the 50's who's biggest problem was whether or not a boy liked her, all the while my family was fighting for my life. What kind of selfish ridiculous creature was I anyway? Why did I have this inane desire to be part of a world that I would never really be able to be a part of? Why did I have to risk the safety of my family in order to feel normal? I wasn't normal, I was never going to be normal and no amount of human friends and school plays was going to change that…I might as well just go through the transformation now and get it over with. At least then we won't have to worry anymore about transients wanting to kill me for pleasure.

Edward stood up with pain and concern streaking across his face, pulling me up with him to stand in front of him. He held the tops of my arms gingerly in his hands, his eyes boring into mine, and slightly shaking me back and forth as he spoke. "You just stop that right now! You are NOT selfish. You deserve to be a regular teenager; you deserve to have a life! You are not hurting us by being part of a school play or anything else that you choose to do. I do not want to EVER hear you thinking that you want us to change you just to keep everyone safe. I refuse to let someone else I love be forced to live this life just to stay safe! WE will keep YOU safe, not the other way around and I don't want you worrying about it!"

As he finished he pulled me into a hug and held me there for a long time. I could feel the tension in his body and I could tell that if he were capable of producing tears, he would have been crying as he held me. Finally he pulled me back again gently looking at me softly and tucked my hair behind my right ear.

"I love you Lina…I love you like you were my own daughter. You don't have to worry. Trust us…we have it all under control." Then he flashed a half smile at me as he remembered something that made him happy.

"I just remembered a conversation I had with Alice before today's drama. If I'm not mistaken, we need to have a family discussion regarding you and dating."

I frowned for a second and looked up with sadness filling my face. "Well, do you really think it's such a good idea? I mean with all that just happened I'm not sure I want to go out with a group of defenseless human teens right now. What if I put them all in danger right along with me?"

"What did Edward just say about trusting us?" Bella added with a smirk.

"Yes, but putting your lives on the line for me to go to a movie with a boy is not really sensible."

"Eh,eh!" he chastened shaking a finger at me as though I were a toddler about to touch a forbidden object, "What did I say about you not worrying about us? Besides, it takes a lot more than one curious nomad to get the better of us! It's been a long night and I'm guessing you need some rest…but we'll discuss it tonight and let you know how everyone thinks we should handle everything in the morning before school. Okay?"

"Okay…if you insist."

"We do," Bella said with a smile and a wink. She hugged me as she walked past on her way out of the room. Edward followed her smiling his crooked smile at me as he left the room.

The rest of the family filtered in throughout the rest of the evening, taking turns to come up to remind me not to worry and give me hugs. Emmett teased me about going out with Connor and me not knowing what to do if a he tried to kiss me. After his third underhanded jab he finally managed to get the rise out of me he hoped for.

"That's it! Emmett, get your annoying butt out of here, and all I can say is you better hope I never became a newborn vampire because my first action as a newborn will be to kick your butt all the way to Canada!" I yelled as I ineffectively attempted to shove him out the door.

He laughed heartily and finally turned to leave the room mumbling a sarcastic, "Oooh, I'm scared; I'm shaking in my boots over here!" over his shoulder as he left.

I grabbed one of my new designer boots off the end of my bed and threw it at him nailing him right between the shoulder blades as I shouted "You would be if you knew what's good for you!" It was as useless gesture since he wouldn't even hardly feel it but it made me feel better. The boy drove me nuts, but he did know how to distract me, even if it was by annoying the heck out of me.

Alice and Rose came up next and Alice apologized repeatedly for not noticing the change in events sooner. She swore she would be more vigilant next time. I told her that it wasn't her fault and she shouldn't blame herself. It was true, as long as I lived with them; these things were bound to happen. I just hated that my interference in their lives always led to so much drama that they shouldn't have to deal with. They would never admit it, but I knew as much as they might love me that it was hard having me live with them. My mere presence caused them pain thanks to the smell of the blood coursing through my veins. The thirst that they always had to fight constantly tortured them any time I was near them. They loved me enough to endure it and do their best to ignore it, but I had overheard discussions various times throughout my life that they never intended for me to hear and I knew it had to be so hard on them. It broke my heart to know that I caused them pain, but I couldn't really change things and the only thing I could do they didn't want me to do…which was to transform into one of them as well.

My Mom, Dad, and Jasper were the last to come up to comfort me. My parents told me how proud they were that I was doing so well at school and that they hoped that the events of the day wouldn't be too distracting for me. They really wanted me to not worry and enjoy school as much as possible. They tucked me into bed and left the room leaving me alone with Jasper. He tiptoed over and kissed my forehead telling me to sleep tight as he filled the room with an essence of peace and tranquility. I whispered a thank you to him just before my eyes fell shut dropping me into unconsciousness as I fell into a deep dreamless sleep.


	15. Chapter 15

**15. The Curse**

My eyes popped open suddenly, memories from the night before flooding my consciousness. I turned to look at my alarm clock across the room glowing red in the darkness. Four forty-five am. Technically I still had another hour before I had to wake up, but my mind was already reeling and there was no way I was going to get back to sleep now.

A shiver ran through my body when I thought about how close the nomadic vampire had been just 22 hours ago without me ever even knowing it. I had never considered the fact that my attacker might sneak up and surprise me. I always assumed for some stupid reason that it would be a face-to-face confrontation…that I would know my attacker and see him coming and be prepared. I realized now what a naïve idea it really was. Bella was right, I had no idea what it would really be like to be faced with a true threat and when it came right down to it, I was not physically capable of being more than an easy mark for any serious hunter. My thoughts were streaming in more and more rapid succession as I lay in my bed when I was abruptly interrupted by a knock at the door.

"Come in Edward," I guessed figuring he was hearing my thoughts and wanting to try to ease my worries again.

"I'm not Edward, but can I still come in?" my Mom said from outside my door.

"Oh, yeah, sorry, come on in. I just figured you were Edward coming in because he was going to argue my current mindset." I continued as she crossed the room and sat gently on the end of my bed.

"And what mindset is that?"

"My sudden realization that I really am naïve to ever think I would stand a chance against a real vampire threat." Tears started to well up in my eyes again as I my thoughts began to escape my mouth…

"Oh Mom! I am such a strain on you all! Why on earth did you ever take me in? You should have let me go into the system and then you all could live in relative peace. Having me here just hurts you all every single day! My blood hurts you, my presence draws unneeded attention, and you always have to focus so much on my safety and protection…your lives would be so much easier if I weren't here!"

My adoptive mother's face was contorted and sad as she reached her hand out for mine and held it firmly in her own looking lovingly into my eyes. "Oh darling, don't you realize that you are a blessing instead of a curse? You are the light that brightens our never-ending night. To each and every one of us you are like a child that we never had and never will be able to have. We all love you dearly and wouldn't trade you for anything!"

"How can you mean that? How can that possibly be true?" I responded looking down at my fingers…my disgusting human fingers.

"Well, I don't know how to answer that. Why does the Earth spin on axis or the sun provide just the right amount of energy to sustain life? It just is. And I have to ask you something else too. Are you really so worried about your blood?" she asked cupping my chin in her hand as she lifted my eyes back to hers. I nodded slightly shame filling my expression.

"Don't you realize that the pain of not having you in our life would be one thousand times greater than the little bit of pain that we sometimes feel in your presence? Not only that, but after all of these years that you have lived with us, most of us don't even feel pain anymore. I won't lie to you, when you first came it was very hard for many of us, but it didn't take very long at all for that to change. Finally we understand how Carlisle is capable of working around blood all day as a doctor. If you are passionate enough about caring for something, eventually you become desensitized to the scent and don't even experience the pain anymore."

I looked up a bit surprised. "Really? My scent really doesn't hurt you anymore?"

She smiled sweetly at me pushing a loose lock of hair behind my ear. "Really and truly."

I smiled back, more than a little bit relieved. My entire life with the Cullens I had carried around the guilt that I made their throats burn by just being in the room with them. I was glad that I didn't cause them pain anymore.

"So, do you want to hear what was decided last night about your date with young Mr. Cusak?"

"Oh, yeah, I had almost forgotten about that. So what's the game plan?"

"Well first of all you're going to go with your friends and have fun. Number one rule is that you can't let this mess ruin this night for you…that was unanimous. Secondly, Alice and Rose insist on taking you shopping in preparation." I rolled my eyes at that part, any excuse for Rose and Alice to shop! "Finally, you're going to find out where you are going and the general time frame and your brothers and sisters will make their own plans within reasonable vicinity in case of trouble, but not interfering in any way with your plans unless it is absolutely mandatory."

"That sounds fair. Anything else?" She looked confused so I continued…

"Well, like curfews? Nights that I am or am not allowed to go out? I mean like for future reference if one date turns into more." I said studying my fingers again with pink flooding my cheeks.

She smiled slightly, "You know, we didn't discuss future dates. We were just concentrating on this one. As far as a curfew goes, I'm guessing that your friends' parents will be more stringent on that than we will since we don't actually sleep and will be staying in close proximity all night anyway. As far as nights when dates are or are not allowed…lets just keep them on the weekends unless it includes a school related activity like ball games."

"That sounds more than fair to me. Thanks Mom…and thanks anybody else in the house who can hear this conversation right now…" I added ever so slightly louder for the benefit of eavesdroppers.

My mother giggled a little and then told me she would leave me to get ready for the day and left the room. I had plenty of time to get ready and knew if I sat in my room without a purpose that I would drive myself crazy with thoughts of deadly nomadic vampires, so I went ahead and got dressed and went downstairs to have a real breakfast in the presence of my family.

I came down with my book bag and jacket so I wouldn't have to head back up before leaving for school and walked into the kitchen where most of my family had congregated. Edward had sensed my thoughts and told Mom who was already busy making me a delicious smelling omelet. I smiled at her whispering a grateful thanks as I went to the fridge to pour myself a glass of orange juice and then went into the dining room.

I entered the dining room to find the remainder of my family, including Nessie and Jake, sitting around reading various pieces of literature and chatting casually. They all smiled up at me when I came in and pointed to the empty seat next to Jacob. I took my seat looking at the little brown leather photo album that Jake slid in front of me on the table.

"You never did get around to checking out our La Push pics…so I brought them over for you to check out today."

"Thanks," I said smiling as I opened the book to the first page. The first picture was of he and Nessie on a Hawaiian beach. They looked so interesting together; her pale perfect skin snuggled up to his deep russet toned chest. They were such a unique and striking couple that it was no wonder that they drew the gazes of everyone around them wherever they went. I slowly flipped through the pages of different people from Jacob's past as he provided names for the faces on each page: His father, Billy; Bella's father and wife Sue; Embry, Quil, and Sam from the pack; Sam, his wife Emily and their three gorgeous children. Most of the guys from the pack had imprinted finally finding peace and had let go of their wolf form resuming the aging process. They were still strong looking and handsome though. Jacob got up from his seat to go get a refill of juice as I flipped one more page to see the face of a sweet looking teen boy who looked only a year or two older than me. He had very attractive brown eyes with undertones of green and a big wide cheerful smile. He looked like just the type of guy that I would enjoy hanging out with.

I had just gotten ready to ask who the young cute boy was when Edward chuckled from across the table and said, "That's Seth…he should be in his thirties now, but he always had way too much fun being a wolf and he's never let it go…so he's stayed the same happy-go-lucky teenager all of these years that he was back when we lived in Forks. And yes he is as nice and sweet as he looks."

I blushed slightly at the last comment. That was the part I always hated about Edward's abilities, he always knew when I found someone attractive before I even realized it myself most times. I lingered over the picture of Seth before moving on. I had heard a lot about Seth, who just so happened to be Bella's step brother, and had talked to him a few times when he called the house looking for Edward or Jake, but I had never had a face to go with the name. It was a good face.

I turned the page quickly as Jake slid back into his seat, but I could see from the twinkle in his eyes that he had been paying attention to the conversation while he was out of the room, but he was nice enough not to push the issue. He continued to narrate for me as I turned the pages. The last page held the photo of an exotic beauty with a deep sadness in her eyes. My heart went out to the tortured princess.

"That's Leah, Seth's older sister," Jake commented. "To spite the fact that she really wishes she could, she's never been able to calm her temper enough to let go of the wolf. It really gets her down."

"She looks so sad…poor girl. That would be hard." I said agreeing with his evaluation. I sat staring into her beautiful sad eyes lost in thought as I finished my omelet. I recognized someone in those eyes, not so much the color, but the feeling behind them…and then the realization hit me. I had seen that look coming from my own eyes when I was alone in my room. There were very rare times that I allowed myself to really wallow in my own thoughts and feel sorry for myself, and that was when both Edward and Jasper would go hunting together. In those rare and dark afternoons I would allow myself to embrace the loneliness and emptiness I sometimes felt being so different from all those around me that I loved, as well as all the guilt I harbored for the strains I placed on those I loved the most, and when I allowed all the feelings and thoughts to flood my mind my eyes looked exactly like Leah's.

My mind had only drifted in this direction for a fraction of a second, for an instant I let down my guard not remembering that this was NOT one of those days that Edward and Jasper were away together…well not remembering until Edward's and Jasper's heads snapped up simultaneously from the newspapers that they were reading. I closed my eyes wishing with all my heart that I hadn't slipped up, that I hadn't dropped my mask for that moment and let Edward see. Jasper's look was just one of confusion as to why I had the sudden rush of sadness followed by guilt, but Edward's was more of total misery.

"How did you keep that from me all of these years? I can't believe I never knew!" He finally said when his face finally softened.

_I'm so sorry Edward, I never wanted you to see that. I've always worked so hard for you to never see that._ I responded in my thoughts not wanting everyone else to know exactly what we were discussing, to spite the fact that they were all looking at us in frustration.

"Don't apologize. You don't have to hide how you're feeling from me, ever. You're entitled to every feeling you ever have. Please, don't hide any part of who you are, you should never have to bury parts of yourself so deeply just to save others feelings. It's not healthy Lina. Besides, remember what Esme said to you earlier, it was all true."

_Actually I think it's very healthy…it forces me not to linger on it more than I should. I have days when I let it all out and deal with it and then I move on. Plus, I think it's all part of being a teenager anyway…I just know that you're going to take it on so much more personally than you should, so I do my best to keep that one part that might hurt you private. And PLEASE don't tell the others. Nobody really needs to know. _

He frowned deep in thought. "I understand that, but please don't feel like you have to do that in the future. And don't worry, it's nobody's business but yours," he added flashing a look around the room warning Emmett in particular to just let it be.

"Thank you." I said quietly as I picked up my plate and turned to the kitchen to wash it quickly before leaving for school. As I went to stand I saw Jacob's gaze go from the picture of Leah and then to my face and a flash of realization crossed his face as he put the conversation he had just heard together with what had claimed my attention just before it had began. He looked at Edward who I saw nod in my peripheral vision. Even if Edward promised not to share our conversation, they were eventually going to put the pieces together on their own just as Jacob had.

_Oh just let them figure it out on their own and get to school Lina._ I said to myself as I crossed the threshold into the kitchen. I fought to focus on things like the color of the grass outside of the window over the sink and the pinkish orange hue of the sunrise cresting over the horizon in the distance, anything to keep my thoughts away from how bad I felt over what Edward had just seen and what my family would feel when the finished piecing together the puzzle of this morning. I mumbled my goodbyes to my family as I walked out the back door and to my car. How is it that the fragile insignificant human always ended up hurting the indestructible vampires one way or another? No matter what my Mother said, I knew I was a curse.


	16. Chapter 16

**16. Unexpected Wisdom**

I walked through the morning at school in a daze of depression. I went through the motions of class, but I wasn't really seeing or hearing anything around me, I just kept hearing my own voice in my head taunting me, admonishing me in a steady cadence for being the worst thing that ever happened to my family. I could faintly hear the voices of my mother and brother trying to convince me otherwise, but they were ineffective in penetrating the power of my screaming conscience. I knew that Edward and Alice were probably seeing the whole thing, but after my slip this morning, there was no longer any use in trying to hide my depression.

My friends kept casting concerned looks in my direction, and I knew what they were seeing. They were seeing the misery that I had seen in Leah's eyes reflected in my own and they felt at a loss as to what to do about it. They spent all morning attempting to bring me out of my stupor of depression, but nothing they attempted did any good. When lunchtime arrived I walked wordlessly to our regular table and sat down folding my arms on top of the table and resting my forehead on them hiding my face in the space created by my arms. I had no desire to eat.

"Aren't you hungry?" Leighton finally asked upon returning to the table with a tray full of food.

I didn't even look up or summon the energy to respond out loud. I just shook my head back and forth across my arms.

"Come on Lina, what's wrong?" she continued. "Are you sick or something?"

Finally I had to lift my head to answer because I knew that I would be hurting even more feelings if I kept this up.

"Bad night." I answered darkly.

"What could have happened to put you in this bad of a mood? Did you fight with your family or something?"

"No…it's hard to explain," was all the answer I could muster.

Leighton looked at me expecting me to continue, but thankfully Lucas stepped in.

"You going to be okay for rehearsal tonight? Mrs. J won't be very forgiving if you miss auditions, sick or not. You might as well kiss the play goodbye if you go home."

"Humm…." I grunted in acknowledgement. The mood I was in, I wasn't really in any shape to play any of the roles in the play…well except maybe for Rizzo when she thought she was pregnant. At this point I didn't really care about the play anymore anyway. The wake up call to my reality the night before had put a damper on any normal life fantasies I had been holding onto. I sat there falling slightly deeper into my despair.

I laid my head back down on my arms and closed my eyes. I hadn't seen my ill-fated stalker, but my mind began to conjure images of the creature that would have destroyed me if my family wasn't talented enough to see it coming. He would have looked a great deal like my family, pale skin, inhuman strength and speed masked behind a beautiful exterior. The only noticeable physical difference would be that his eyes would be crimson thanks to his diet of human blood verses the golden honey hue of my loved ones. A shiver ran down my spine as the mental image of my would-be attacker began to congeal in my mind.

Suddenly the picture in my mind disappeared as a sharp pain penetrated my left shoulder. I jumped up suddenly, taking my dining companions by surprise, and scanned the room behind me for the culprit. Standing on the far side of the commons area by the pay phones in front of the main office was Emmett. I frowned at him rubbing my shoulder reflexively, peeling a hard round spitball from my shoulder.

"Was that really necessary?" I mumbled under my breath. Nobody else could hear what I had said, but I knew Emmett did. He motioned for me to come over to where he was standing.

By now my friends were all staring with curiosity in the direction of my gaze.

"My brother Emmett," I commented dryly. "I'll be back in a few."

I walked over to where Emmett stood staring down at me in annoyance as I stood right in front of him.

"What are you doing here Em?"

"Going against everybody else and coming in here to talk some sense into you, bonehead."

I grabbed his arm attempting to drag him through the doorway to the auditorium. It was dark and empty and would provide us a little more privacy to talk. Of course I couldn't "drag" him anywhere, but he came along willingly with my lead.

"Bonehead?" I questioned with a smirk. Usually his insults were better.

"Yes, Bonehead! You're being a stubborn little bonehead. You worked so hard to get to come here all by yourself and at the first little sign of trouble you're going all hard headed and chicken on us. Snap out of it! Don't you dare go and blow this whole play thing over that stupid nomad."

"I take it Alice had another vision?"

"Of course Alice had another vision. She saw you being a knot on a log all day as soon as you left the house and about three minutes ago she saw you totally blow your final audition. Carlisle and Esme say it's not any of our business and that you are the one choosing to live your own life and if you decide you don't want the play then we shouldn't interfere. But I don't buy it. You WANT this. I've seen what you can do, how good you were up there." He said motioning toward the stage.

"You SAW me?"

"Yeah, I was on Lina duty yesterday and so I was up in the rafters watching all night just in case the guy got any funny ideas and then I left to go help them take care of things once they texted me that they had caught him. I guess we were right to be careful. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that I saw the look you had up there. Maybe that's why I couldn't just sit back and watch you blow it because it saw it for myself…You looked happier than you ever look at home. Don't blow it over something that has happened before and will most certainly happen again!"

"Emmett…I" I started to argue.

He grabbed me into a bear hug being careful not to break any bones, but still strong enough to keep my chest from expanding fully to breathe. After the initial shock that Emmett was actually _hugging _me wore off, I finally managed to gasp "Can't Breathe!"

He let me go and looked me directly in the eyes. "We love you kid. Being a teenager is hard enough, being a regular teenager in our family is even harder…and vampire or not, people always seem to hurt the ones they love the most. It comes along with the whole caring about someone else territory. We forgive you just like we hope you forgive us when the things we do hurt your feelings…and don't try to tell me that it never happens because I know it happens. Anyway, I just thought you should know just how much everyone has enjoyed seeing you happy these past few days. All you have to do is make yourself happy and you make us happy, capiche?"

"Capiche" I responded with a crooked, sarcastic smile, still in total shock that such sensible and mature things were coming out of the mouth of practical joke boy. How is it that my mother and Edward can talk all day and all I hear is them saying things just to make me feel better, but when Emmett says something like this I believe it's true? Maybe it's due to the fact that his role in my life is to irritate me and annoy me, never saying anything _nice_ or even complimentary. I guess when a person gives praise and shows real affection so rarely, when you finally get some from them it comes across as more genuine…or at least that's my theory.

Emmett rubbed the top of my head leaving my hair a tangled mess and disappeared into the dark chasm of the auditorium, leaving me alone by the door. I emerged from the dark room into the bright light of the commons, combing the tangles out with my fingers. My mood felt lighter. For the first time in 16 hours, I truly felt that my world wasn't crashing down around me.

_Maybe I was being just a bit melodramatic with the whole curse thing. Maybe Emmett was right, if you live with and care about people then you're bound to hurt them from time to time. It's just part of the human condition, and I guess the vampire condition too._ I thought to myself.

Suddenly ravenous I walked over to the lunch line and grabbed an slice of pizza to eat in the last few minutes left before the lunch period was over and went back to sit down with my friends.

They looked at me a bit baffled by my massive mood swing and smiled, glad to see that I was somewhat back to my normal self. I didn't know what they thought about my conversation with my brother and I didn't care. I scarfed my pizza down in record time thinking over the atypical conversation I had just shared with my brother. A large grin brightened my face as I chuckled aloud softly and shook my head.

_Ha…Bonehead…that boy is in desperate need of some new material._ I thought to myself. _Okay, this is it Lina...you are going to suck it up and stop feeling sorry for yourself and do your best with the auditions for this play, not only for yourself, but for your family. _ If what Emmett said was true and my happiness resulted in their happiness, then I was going to do my best to be just that…happy.

Just then the bell rang and as we picked up our things and went to leave Riley leaned over and whispered, "What's so funny?"

"My brother…he's a doofus, but he does have a knack for pulling me out of a funk."

"I should say so…you walked in here looking like you were ready to off yourself and after 5 minutes talking to him you're all giggly."

I smiled with a slight giggle that emphasized his point with a little shrug and then I waved bye as I spun around and headed off to my next class.


	17. Chapter 17

**17. Angelina Barbie**

The rest of the day I felt light as a cloud in comparison to how I had felt all morning. I'm not entirely sure how having Emmett say the things to me that he did had set me free like this…I guess it was just the honesty of it that finally set in…but I truly did feel like a massive weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I remembered what Edward had said to me the night before, "_WE will keep YOU safe, not the other way around …" _His words kept echoing in my head. So my goal would be this, to just be a normal teenager and let my family take care of the big worries…food, shelter, safety…most teens never spent a single second thinking about these things…particularly the last. They took it for granted that their parents would protect them from danger. Granted the dangers I faced were more intense than everyone else's, but there was nothing I could do about them and worrying did no good. I would just let it go and let them do what they do best and take care of the big stuff.

P.E. marked the first day of physical fitness testing. Every year the students endure tests the first week to see what their capabilities are and then are tested two times later in the school year to see how they were improving. This basically meant that we had to go in front of the class one at a time to do various tasks as the teacher wrote down how you did and the rest of the students were free to sit and talk. Normally this would be a nice break, but today this left me open for the third degree about my strange mood swings that nobody could help but notice.

Connor came and sat down next to me first with the rest of the gang following suit. They let him do all of the talking, but it was quite clear that they were listening in to get the scoop.

"So what's the story with the manic depression today? This morning you looked like death walking and now you seem really up."

"LONG story."

"We've got nothing but time" he smiled back letting his cute little dimple wink at me.

"It was a long night. I got some bad news and then I ended up hurting my family's feelings this morning and I felt really bad about the whole thing. I didn't even want to be here. I would have given my left arm to be able to spend the whole day locked in my room under the covers."

"Whew…" he said with a slight smile while pretending to wipe sweat off his brow. "I was a little worried this morning that you were rethinking the date night or something."

"Oh, no way! That reminds me…We got the green light this morning. The only thing is I have to give them a general itinerary, but besides that we're all set."

"Cool!" he looked excited and a bit relieved for a second and then he frowned slightly returning to our original topic. "So what brought you back to life today anyway?"

"My dork of a brother Emmett came up during lunch and talked to me and he sort of straightened me out."

"Wow…as down as you were and all you needed was your brother to talk to you and you went from that to this?" he said waving his hands in front of me like a magician revealing a really cool illusion.

"Well, he's not the serious type, so when he gave me a serious talk I realized that he was right and I adjusted my thinking."

"That's cool I guess."

"So guys…" I said turning the topic to the whole group, "What is the general game plan for Saturday anyway? My parents are sort of protective and want a breakdown of general time and place info."

Thankfully this took the focus off me and my mood swings. The whole group started debating restaurants and movies and driving arrangements. I listened attentively occasionally throwing my opinion out when needed or asked. By the end of class our weekend plans were pretty well decided and we were off to auditions. Tonight wouldn't hold as much stress for us since the next and final set of cuts weren't until tomorrow night.

Rehearsal went smoothly and quickly that evening. I was relieved to be chosen to audition with Connor, but the scene chosen for the final audition did not give me confidence. We portray the last scene at the fair with Sandy's big sexy reveal and sing "You're the One that I Want" together. The song itself I was confident with, but me playing sexy was the biggest joke ever. Any confidence I had ever held in my acting abilities disappeared when I thought about trying to pull this off.

I tried to calm myself by remembering that it was never my goal to play Sandy, and that all I had to do was either prove my rudimentary acting skills in order to be rewarded a lesser part or just reveal the basic dedication needed to be allowed to be part of the stage crew. It didn't matter of I was on stage, the whole idea was just to be a part of something outside of my family life…but at the same time I always had a drive to do my best at everything, so I wanted to do well. Connor was constantly encouraging me and telling me that I was doing an awesome job, but I wasn't sure how true it was or if he was just being nice. A part of me was hoping that Emmett was somewhere in the rafters again tonight watching over me during rehearsals. I knew he would give me a brutally honest critique of my performance.

All too soon, practice was over. The next time I would take the stage it would be our final audition. I had plans to once again attempt to dress the part. Hoping Alice was paying attention I mumbled a little request for help from her and Rose when I got home putting together an appropriate outfit and maybe a few lessons in sensuality. Perhaps with the right coaching I would have a chance of not making a complete and total fool of myself.

I walked into the back door of the house and straight through to the dining room. There at the table sat Emmett and Rosalie playing cards. My parents, Edward, Bella, and Alice were all in the nearby kitchen. Rose looked up and smiled at me knowingly as I stepped behind Emmett. Without any warning I put my arms around his neck giving him a quick squeeze and a kiss on the top of the head. I giggled lightly as I saw the wide eyes and open mouths of my family seeing this strange share of sweet affection that Emmett normally avoided from everyone but Rose.

"Thank you for what you said, it was exactly what I needed to hear." I said laying my cheek on his head tightening my squeeze for emphasis. He reached up and patted my arm and I could see from his refection in the window across from us that he was smiling triumphantly.

I looked back up at Rose, "Did Alice or Edward receive my plea for help?"

"That Alice and I get you as a willing Barbie for the night? You bet!" she replied with a twinkle in her eye and in an instant she was at my side dragging me out of the room.

"Hey! What about me?" Emmett asked attempting to sound hurt.

She winked in his direction, "We have eternity babe…but this is a once in a lifetime opportunity." She joked over her shoulder as she drug me toward the stairs to her second floor bedroom.

As we got to the staircase I heard Edward ask "So what _exactly_ did you say to her to pull her out of that slump so fast anyway?"

"That's between me and the kid bro…between me and the kid." I heard Emmett say just before we reached a distance too far away for me to be able to hear low volume conversations.

Rosalie pulled me into her room as Alice began pulling clothes from her closet. I wasn't sure what they thought they were doing because I was way too big for Rose's or Alice's clothes. It was only after seeing the tags on the clothes while trying them on that I realized that these were things that they had bought specially for me and hid them in Rose's closet in anticipation of this night. Alice must have seen or at least guessed it was coming.

I tried to explain as they painstakingly did my hair and makeup that I wouldn't have time to do all of this before the audition tomorrow. There was no way in Hades I would go through a whole day of school looking like this either, but they just kept going explaining it would help me step into character more.

Two hours later I stood in front of Rose's gigantic gilded mirror in shock. I definitely looked the part. They had three different outfits to choose from, one was the basic movie adaptation outfit that everyone thought of first when they thought of the big reveal, but they decided that they liked the idea of making me stand out in case others had similar plans. I definitely had experts in getting the right look for the era…after all they had both lived through the 50's so they had first hand knowledge. The second alternative was a really nice red form fitting dress, which I vetoed because the tight little skirt would have made dancing nearly impossible. In the end they finally settled on a red satin Marilyn Monroe halter style dress with a neckline that plunged far below the limits that I usually chose for my attire. This was coupled with red heels with a closed toe and satin ribbons that laced up my ankle and a beautiful heart shaped necklace encrusted with diamonds around my neck that was a loaner from Alice. I was worried about the heels, but upon further inspection I had noticed that they had intentionally gotten me a thicker heel for more balance and the ankle lacing actually gave me a little more support. My hair was the wrong color, but beyond that the effect was exquisite.

I was still standing there looking in the mirror when Emmett walked in to grab something from his side of the bed. He was in the middle of a sentence as he walked in but when he took his second step into the room he looked up and froze. Suddenly there was silence, which was a true rarity in the presence of Emmett. He sputtered for a few seconds apparently unable to speak or even toss out one of his usual insults and then turned and walked out of the door without even grabbing what he had come in to get. Rose and Alice laughed as I stood there blushing. I wasn't quite sure what all of that was about, and I had already felt incredibly exposed in this dress, so having a reaction like that from the one person I could always count on for a bad joke to break my nerves was not helping.

"I don't know about this guys, I feel really, really uncomfortable!"

"Of course you do, beauty is pain." Rose said putting her arm around my shoulder.

"Okay, but that still doesn't change the fact that I practically feel naked and that's not going to help me stay calm and do well on stage."

"Sure it will," Alice chimed in, "Sandy was uncomfortable at first, but then she got past it quickly, as will you. Especially once we're done teaching you a thing or two." She added with a wink.

I spent the next hour being instructed on how to walk and toss my hair. After mastering walking, I had to make sure I was able to dance in the heels, which I actually managed to do far better than I had anticipated. They even went as far as to have me practice different ways of looking out of my eyes, and instructing me on which look to use at which point. I felt like a complete and total moron, but they claimed it all looked good. It was nearing midnight when my lessons with the glamour twins finally ended and I was able to get to sleep. I felt slightly more confident as far as how to display the right attitude on stage when I was trying to be more alluring. I just hoped that nerves wouldn't erase all that I had learned tonight. I fell asleep quickly and thankfully my dreams were peaceful. I had made my peace with the idea that even if I fail, at least I was doing my best to prepare as much as possible.


	18. Chapter 18

**18. The Diabolical Duo**

I woke up Friday morning to find that the butterflies in my abdomen had already begun to flutter. I went over and over the routine for my audition in my mind as I dressed and packed the things I needed for the day. I was particularly nervous about Alice's necklace and decided that I was going to have to wear it all day or else my day would be full of fears of the priceless keepsake being stolen or lost.

I had been extremely surprised when Alice offered the beautiful treasure to me the night before. My whole life with the Cullens I had always admired this necklace above all of the other beautiful jewels and trinkets in their massive accessory collections. It had been Jasper's present to Alice at their very first wedding, so it was even more priceless than the actual dollar value it held, which was a very large sum. I kept asking Alice over an over after she gave it to me if she was sure and she kept insisting that she and Jasper wanted me to wear it. She said that it would bring me luck including a knowing wink for emphasis. I knew then that it had to do with one of her visions, but I was determined not to ask any further questions.

I took one last look in the mirror before loading up all of my bags for the day and heading down to greet my family. My hair had fallen overnight, but still held a bit of the body it had the night before. It wasn't as good, but if it would hold out through the day at school then it would be enough to help give me a more appealing look than usual during auditions.

I loaded up my arms with the two duffel bags, my garment bag that held my dress for the audition and an oyster colored trench coat to wear over the dress until I was on stage, and my leather jacket and began making my way toward the front room, nearly falling down the stairs on the way. I was grateful that Jasper happened to be watching TV in the living room and reacted quickly enough to keep me from tumbling down the stairs. He caught me just as my center of gravity shifted slightly too far forward for me to compensate. He steadied me and took all of the bags from my arms in one smooth motion while laughing slightly at my atypical lack of coordination.

"Nervous are we?" he asked lightly, as if _he_ had to ask.

"Just a tad," I responded smiling. "Thanks for the rescue and for letting me borrow the necklace."

"Anytime" He said as he followed me to the bottom of the stairs and offered to take my bags out to my car for me. I gratefully surrendered my car keys, relieved that I wouldn't have to heave the extremely awkward bags all the way out to the garage.

I walked into the kitchen to find that breakfast was ready and waiting for me, along with the glamour twins.

"Big day, you need a big breakfast to get a good start. Hard to be sexy on a whacked out metabolism." Rose called cheerfully as I entered the room.

"Thanks" I said as I picked up the plate that held a very tasty looking omelet and a variety of cubed fruits and made my way into the dining room.

"Do you remember everything from last night?" Alice asked ready to begin quizzing me.

"I'm pretty sure, I'm trying to keep myself calm though. If I over think it then I'll blow it for sure!"

"You'll be fine, don't stress." Alice replied in a far too knowing tone of voice.

I pointed at her with my fork glaring at her through squinty eyes, "No safety net missy. You're still bound to secrecy until after my audition is over."

She held her hands up as though being held at gunpoint with an innocent look on her face. "Yes, Ma'am!"

I took another big bite of my omelet just as the main house phone rang. I expected one of my sisters to answer the phone since they weren't the ones who had to eat, but neither one made a move for the phone. When it rang for the third time I looked up sarcastically cocking my head.

"Fine, I'll answer it then." They smiled at each other as I got up and crossed the kitchen to answer the phone mounted on the far wall by the wall oven. Plotting…they were always plotting.

"Hello? Cullen Residence."

"Hello, this is Seth Clearwater, is this Bella?"

"Oh, no this is Lina."

"Oh hi Lina. How are you?"

"Pretty good, how are you Seth?"

"Things are good. How's school going? Nessie was telling me that you're going on your own this year without the security service."

I laughed lightly, "It's been pretty good so far. I'm still only in my first week, but it's good. I'm trying out for the school play tonight actually."

"Oh really? Well good luck."

"Thanks. Did you have a nice visit with Jake and Nessie? I just saw their pictures from the trip yesterday. Actually, they had a picture of you in their album from their trip. It's kind of nice to have a face to associate with the name."

Alice's voice floated in from the dining room, "And she liked what she saw!"

I shot her the most menacing look I could manage as she giggled away from her seat at the dining room table. I was hoping against hope that he didn't hear that, but I was very familiar with wolf hearing, and Seth's was legendarily known to be more acute than some.

If he had heard her, he didn't let on though, "Yeah…I know what you mean. They were showing pictures of you guys off all over the Res too. It was really nice to have them home. Speaking of…is Jake around by chance? I've been trying their house and Nessie's cell all morning and I haven't been able to reach them."

"Huh…well, no they're not here. I'm not sure why you couldn't reach them though…that's kind of odd. Oh wait…what date is it today?"

"September 9th."

"Oh crap! It's Nessie's birthday…it totally slipped my mind. Well that answers your question at least, I'm sure they'll be _celebrating_ all day and won't be answering their phones. I can leave a note for him to call you the next time he comes over though."

"Oooohhh, okay, well yeah…uh, thanks."

"Any special message you want me to add or just that you called?"  
"Just let him know I called please."

"Will do," the line fell silent, neither of us really knowing what to say next, "…well, I need to get going. I've got to get to school pretty soon and then final auditions are tonight."

"Okay, thanks for taking the message and break a leg!"

I laughed nervously, picturing literally breaking my leg on stage. "Thanks…bye Seth."

"Bye Lina."

I turned back to the table with homicidal thoughts. "What in the heck was that?! That was a setup if I've ever seen one!"

Alice smiled slyly, "Hey, you said school related things only were off limits. You never mentioned cute werewolves from La Push."

"You are absolutely diabolical woman!

"I try!"

"Wait a minute though, you can't see the werewolves so what on earth could you possibly be up to."

"I can't see what they're up to, but I've learned to judge when they're entering the equation due to the future disappearing. Mine disappeared about an hour ago, so I decided to let you answer the phone just in case and then your disappeared and then I saw THIS conversation and knew it was the right thing to do."

"Like I said…diabolical," I mumbled shaking my head.

"Hey Rose, I do have a question for you though. What in the world was up with Emmett's reaction last night? Did you ever find out?"

Both girls laughed heartily for a few seconds. I was beginning to think that I wasn't going to get an answer and then Rose finally managed to gather herself enough to speak again. "Well, to be honest you kind of shocked him. He has never accepted that you really are growing up. In his mind you're still the 11 year old tomboy that used to climb trees with him. He walked in there and saw you looking all grown up and womanly and it totally freaked him out. It took half the night before he finally started acting normal again."

"I don't get it."

"Sweetie, he realized that you really are growing up. It was like any father figure who walks around oblivious to how his daughter is growing and developing until he's slapped in the face by it when she finally gets around to wearing something that actually displays just how _womanly _she is."

I looked down blushing and feeling just a bit bad for Emmett. I never really thought about him reacting like that. I always thought of him as an annoying pest and I never dreamed it would bother him that I was growing up.

"Thanks for explaining." I finally responded and then looked at my watch realizing the time.

"Okay, well, no time left to eat, not that I have that much of an appetite anyway. I'm off ladies. Wish me luck!"

"You don't need it," Rosalie chimed in, "You had the best tutors ever. You'll do great!"

I rolled my eyes and waved goodbye as I ran out the back door to my car.

The school day drug on at an agonizingly slow cadence. I was nervous about the audition, but at the same time, I was tired of worrying about it. I just wanted it to be over. I wasn't alone. The conversations at lunch and between classes seemed to reflect the same feelings in everyone trying out that night. We couldn't even gather the energy to discuss Saturday's plans. We were too distracted by dance moves and key changes.

Finally P.E. rolled around. We dressed and all walked out into our attendance lines, every one of us that were about to audition in a short while looked like a defendant on trial for murder. We all fidgeted and shared nervous looks around the gym. We knew we had an hour to sit in class today watching everyone take a turn trying to do the bent arm hang from a pull up bar, all the while totally freaking out over how well we would do on stage.

We had a nice surprise though, after attendance and warm ups the teacher announced that we would go in a slightly different order today and that all the students auditioning for the play would go first and then be allowed to go get ready for auditions. We all sat there in shock, surprised that the teacher would be so kind…that is until I saw Alice and Rose wave at me from the other side of the gym. The teacher continued telling us that we would be chaperoned by my sisters, who graciously offered to help us all get dressed and ready for our auditions.

_So THAT was why they took so much time working on my hair and make up last night, they knew all along that they would have some time to do it again today. They're not just diabolical, they are like masters of the Jedi mind trick or something!_

Malia and Leighton turn to look at me in unison. "THOSE are your sisters?" then Leighton continued, "Wow…do your parents like only adopt super models or what?"

"Obviously not or else I wouldn't be here." I retorted sarcastically.

They giggled and then Leighton continued. "It's just wow, your brother who came yesterday was a total babe and then you look at them and it's like holy mackerel!"

"Yeah, I know, try living with them. It's not exactly a self esteem booster…but they're mostly all down to earth about it. Well besides Rosalie, she's a bit full of herself."

I heard a low hiss from across the room, so I added so low nobody else but my sister could hear, "no offense Rose, but you know it's sort of true…I know you're here to help me though…sorry."

"What? I couldn't hear you." Leighton responded.

"Oh nothing, just going over a line to myself that I can't seem to get quite right." I lied badly.

"Oh. Well, anyway, it's cool that they're doing that for us. If I don't get a chance tell them thanks for me okay?" I could see from her body language that her self preservation instincts were kicking in a bit and she wasn't sure she wanted to tell them herself. I understood…most people reacted to them like that.

"Sure, no prob." I added with a smile knowing that they had heard it all themselves so my job was already done.

"Angelina Cullen" the teacher called making me jump. I hadn't realized it was my turn already. I went up and jumped up to hang there for the test. I could have hung on quite a bit longer, but I wanted to get to work so I stayed up just the bare minimum to received a satisfactory mark and to leave room to show improvement during the next round of testing later in the year and then went to join my sisters waiting for me and the few girls that had already gone ahead of me standing in a small group a few feet away from my sisters. It was that self preservation instinct again…safety in numbers and maintaining a safe distance from the possible threat.

My sisters offered to help the other girls out of general politeness and were turned down by all but Malia. Malia either lacked the self preservation instinct or just had a very trusting soul because she seemed just as comfortable with my sisters and I did. They kept up the conversation with us as they worked feverishly helping Malia and I get our hair and makeup just right. Amazingly what had taken a couple of hours the night before only took 40 minutes to complete today after which time I stood in front of the single full length mirror in the locker room looking exactly as I had the night before. My fingers began to tremble as I reached up checking to make sure that Alice's priceless treasure was still secure around my neck.

I slowly turned around to see that all of the other girls in the room were looking at me with bug eyes. As my sisters had anticipated, every one of them had chosen to wear outfits that were various incarnations of the outfit that had been on Sandy in the final scene of the movie. I was the only one in the room that stood out in my satin halter dress. I felt my cheeks begin to flood with crimson as I stuttered to explain… "Uh, uh, it was my sister's idea to wear something to make me stand out a bit. Is it too much?"

My response was not audible, but rather a room full of girls shaking their heads suddenly looking a bit more nervous than they had a few minutes ago. I think they were beginning to wish they had allowed Rose and Alice to help them as well. Then Malia stepped out from behind the door of the bathroom stall that she had gone into to change into her outfit, suddenly taking the attention off me to my relief. Suddenly the other girls were doing more than beginning to wish, they were kicking themselves. She looked absolutely stunning. She wore a much more modest emerald colored gown that had a black rose design embedded in the black trim that covered the dress. It had black spaghetti straps and a black satin bow at the waist line with some sort of black toile underskirt that gave the dress a cute little puff effect. Her auburn streaked hair was up in a very era appropriate twist style with soft tendrils framing her small sweet face. She looked like a sweet little angelic girl who stepped out of the pages of a 1950's Life magazine. Suddenly I felt like I looked extremely trashy!

After she recovered from the surprise at the looks she received coming out of the bathroom she finally said shyly, "My mom had the same thought about the dressing differently thing."

I walked over to her and put my arm around her shoulder bringing her to stand in front of the full length mirror. Her eyes widened as she took in the full effect of her hair and the dress. "You look AMAZING Malia! You're going to knock 'em dead." I said giving her a supportive squeeze. Looking at the two of us standing side by side in the mirror, I suddenly had the urge to put my trench coat on immediately and not take it off ever again.

Alice was suddenly behind me sensing my urge with the coat in hand. "Okay sweetie, it's time to go and show them what you're made of."

I slipped on the coat and turned around to face her and bent down even further than was typically needed thanks to the heels to give her a big hug. "Thank you so much." I whispered into her ear.

Then I sashayed my way as instructed the night before over to Rosalie who was gathering my things on the other side of the room. She stood to look at me, with the heels we were pretty much the same height. "Rose, thank you so much. You two are the best sisters anyone could ever have." I said as I gave her a big hug.

She smiled and winked at me and then turned me to face the door. "Go knock their socks off baby!"

The next couple of hours were a bit of a blur. It was like I was walking in a hazy dream as the rest of the girls and I made our way to the auditorium, crossing through the commons as we went. Malia and I led the way with most of the interested gazes landing on Malia. I was pleased that for the first time since I had arrived a few days ago that somebody else was getting all of the looks. I was sick to death of the new girl intrigue and I loved seeing someone who was so amazing getting the attention that she deserved.

Our partners were waiting for us outside the auditorium. The first person that caught the attention of every guy there was Malia. I had a huge grin on my face as I saw her blush at the attention. Now I understood why Emmett enjoyed embarrassing me so much…it was kind of fun to watch someone else react to attention for a change. Most of the boys were looking at her with a sort of bewilderment, all except for Riley. He looked at her so sweetly, like he always saw her looking like this, even when others couldn't see it. I felt a twinge in my gut…I realized after a second that it was jealousy. I desperately wanted someone to look at me like that.

I was grateful for the trench coat because I thankfully didn't get as much of a response from anyone else. Connor smiled at me sweetly and told me I looked nice. I kept noticing his gaze lock on something behind me and then back to my face again. He seemed distracted, but I decided that it might just be nerves. We were all jittery.

We entered the auditorium and got a few short instructions from Mrs. J and then each couple were given a number and directed to sit in the commons area until our number was called. Connor and I were couple number 10. We went over our cues and marks together as we sat in the commons trying to keep our minds focused. It seemed like an eternity before our number was called.

The audition itself was a blur in my mind. When it was over I was only able to remember a few scant details. The main thing I remember is the look on Connor's face when I stepped out on stage and took off my trench coat. It couldn't have been more perfect if we had tried. He didn't have to act, just like Danny, he was totally flabbergasted. I didn't have to act either, I felt extremely exposed.

I blushed and looked at my feet instinctively and then remembered my role and looked back pretending it was Rose and Alice standing behind me instructing me on what to do next and then I was suddenly in character. I know I remembered to sashay, toss my hair, and look out of my eyes the way my sisters had suggested. I remembered all of the words to the song which was good, and most of all I remember the thrill that ran up my spine when Connor's hands made contact with my waist the first time during the dance. It was brief, but returned again with a vengeance when we ended in the final pose with him standing behind me with his chin on my shoulder and his arms around my waist. I could feel his breath on my neck and a shiver ran up my spine.

I was shaking so hard I could barely walk as we stepped out of the stage door into the hallway. Connor turned to me with his eyes wide.

"You were absolutely amazing! Wow! You were perfect!"

I blushed and thanked him, still remembering the thrill that had run up my spine at his touch. I quickly slipped by into my trench coat when I realized that there was a rising murmur filling the hallway that was related to my dress. I had been right though, with the audition behind me, I suddenly felt much calmer. I was still a bit anxious to find out what parts were awarded to whom, but it wasn't anywhere near the intensity it was before. My friends were all within a few couples of us, so we waited to see how they did. We sat and chatted for a few minutes before deciding to go home and grab dinner with plans to meet back up around 11pm when the casting list was supposed to be posted on the main school doors. We walked in a group out to our cars and went our separate ways to change and come back later to meet up.


	19. Chapter 19

**19. Drum Roll Please**

Thankfully my sisters had taken all of my things home, so I didn't have to worry about trying to carry them all in my heels. I walked in the back door of the house to find that my family was of course sitting there waiting for me with wide bright smiles…even Jake and Nessie were there to spite it being her birthday.

I smiled over at the birthday girl, "Happy Birthday Ness! I'm sorry, but I sort of let it slip my mind until this morning. I promise I have a gift picked out, I just didn't get a chance to get it for you yet."

She smiled back, "That's okay, _you've _been busy."

I shrugged a little feeling really guilty, "Not a very good excuse though."

I sat down and began to unlace the shoes that were torturing my poor feet to the point of cruelty. I stretched my feet out in front of me wiggling my now screaming toes in an attempt to restore blood flow and looked up at their expectant faces with a blank look. For the life of me I didn't know what they were expecting though. Finally I spoke up..

"What? You guys probably already know more than I do!"

"Well, tell us about your audition," my mother encouraged.

"Alice or Edward could probably tell you more than I can, to be honest I was so nervous it was a big blur for me."

"We still want to hear your point of view," my father answered from the other end of the table.

I recounted the experience as best I could, leaving out the chills and shivers of course. There was no way I was going to get into that. I'm sure Edward was fully aware of the things that I skipped over on purpose, but he didn't let on more than the crooked smile that crossed his lips when I would think of something that I was not going to share. They all sat listening with intense interest. Emmett was right; they really were enjoying seeing me happy.

"But I won't know anything for sure until the cast list is posted at 11pm. I'm supposed to meet my friends up there to find out together if you guys don't mind."

Nobody opposed the idea, but Alice did finally pipe up from position in front of Jasper on the far end of the room. "Are you really going to make us all wait until after 11 to see your reaction to what part you got?"

I grimaced. I wanted to know. I REALLY wanted to know, but that was cheating wasn't it?

Edward, hearing my conflicted thoughts, spoke up from his seat next to my father. "Well, I don't see where it's cheating. Your part of the process is complete; knowing won't influence things…Why not?"

I debated in my head a second more than then focused on Alice. "Okay, why not…what parts do my friends and I get?" My chest tightened with anticipation…I wanted to know more than just me though…I wanted to know about everyone.

She squealed in delight and then pulled out a sheet of paper that she had written on as she had seen it in the vision. Everybody looked her way as though they were truly excited to hear it themselves.

"I haven't told anybody yet, I wanted them to find out when you did. Not even Jasper!"

I lifted my eyebrows in surprise. She could never keep anything from Jasper!

"Exactly how long have you had this list Alice?" I asked wondering exactly how long she had been sitting on this.

"Since you decided to audition. Although you did worry me there for a while yesterday, but it came back unchanged after Emmett visited you. You ready?"

I gulped loudly, not entirely sure if I was ready or not. I nodded finally, my body very tense.

"Danny Zuko will be played by Connor Cusak" I smiled. Good for Connor!

"Rizzo will be played by Leighton Donnelly" I pumped my hand in the air. I knew Leighton was a shoe in for Rizzo.

"Kenickie will be played by Lucas Davies." I shook my head in agreement; it was natural for Leighton and Lucas to be cast opposite one another. I also noticed she was saving me for last.

"Cha-Cha will be played by Danya Kosovich" She was perfect for the role; the girl could dance the heck out of anything.

"Jan will be played by Malia St. John, I kind of hoped that our makeover would give her an upgrade but…" she shrugged.

"Wait" I interrupted, "Who plays Putzie?"

"Putzie will be played by…Riley Davies"

I shook my head, "NO, she'll be happy. She wanted to play the girl Riley ends up with. She didn't like the idea of another girl kissing her man."

Alice nodded knowingly and then continued, "Frenchy will be played by Amy Sawyer." A slight frown crossing her face as she read her name.

I grimaced a second and then gulped, waiting for her to finally get around to my part. I noticed she hadn't said Sandy. I crossed my fingers.

"Sonny will be played by Travis Gordon."

"I think that's all of your friends and now for the drum roll please." Emmett began to drum on the table with increasing speed. I noticed concern cross the face of my mother. She was going to kill him if he got overzealous and broke the table.

"And our very own Angelina Cullen will play the role of…..SANDY OLSSON!"

My family all cheered and Emmett pumped his fist in the air, but I couldn't hear them, I sat there in a state of shock. _I got Sandy? Really? Me? No, I couldn't get Sandy! There's no way. I don't believe it. No freaking way! _I started hyperventilating slightly as the realization hit me that I was playing the LEAD in the school play. I didn't know if I wanted the lead. I went into this hoping for a small part or stage crew…I never dreamed I would get the lead. I guess a part of me wanted it, or I wouldn't have worked so hard for it, but I never honestly believed I would get it. Danya and Amy were prettier and better at everything. Malia had also looked very Sandyish today as well. My breathing sped even faster and I started shaking my head back and forth. Suddenly my family realized that I was not quite on the same page as they were when Edward rushed to my side.

"Lina, Lina, can you hear me?"

I could hear him but I couldn't respond. I shifted my gaze from the table to his face, my eyes still wide with shock. I did however manage to slow my breathing a bit in response to his worry. He laughed slightly.

Suddenly I laughed in loud excited burst. I jumped up and hugged Edward around the neck jumping up and down.

"I can't believe it! I can't believe it! Oh my gosh! Oh My Gosh!" I said running both of my hands through my hair. Everyone was laughing with me as I jumped around the room like a jack rabbit. I no longer noticed the pain in my tortured toes. I was just happy!

After a few minutes of group reverie, I excused myself to go de-Sandy myself. My mother said that she would fix me some supper while I was cleaning up. I walked into my bedroom tossing the shoes on the bed and slipping out of the red satin dress and into my robe. I crossed the hall and took a long hot shower washing my hair an extra time in order to get all of the layers of hairspray out thoroughly. I would have put on a comfy pair of sweats, but I knew I was going to have to go out later to meet up with the gang, so I opted for a pair of jeans, sneakers, and a lightweight tunic top that I loved to chill out in and skittered my way back downstairs to eat whatever my family whipped up for me.

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_Author's note:_

_I know, I know…it's a bit of a cop out to let her get the role of Sandy. But I'm living a bit vicariously here and I ALWAYS wanted to play Sandy. I couldn't resist. _

_Please keep reviewing! Your input helps keep me motivated and thanks for sticking with me this long!_


	20. Chapter 20

**20. Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy!**

I was met with the alluring odor of onions, garlic, and tomatoes as I neared the kitchen. My mouth watered as I recognized my favorite dish simmering on the stove. I could immediately see that it had been a group effort. There was a full buffet waiting on the dining room table. Garlic Italian Bread, salad with Italian dressing, and Tiramisu were all displayed with a bouquet of my favorite Sterling Roses and set with my mother's best china.

"Okay, that's a ton of food for Jake, Nessie, and I to eat all by ourselves!"

Edward and Bella were on the other side of the room standing next to Nessie. Bella smiled as he hugged her beautiful daughter kissing her on the cheek. "It's not every day that my baby girl turns 17 and our favorite high schooler celebrates a major victory!"

Granted her baby reached full maturity ten years ago, but we still celebrated her chronological age every year without fail. The family loved celebrating our birthdays because Nessie, Jake, and I are all still relatively close to the ages that we are turning. They always went way overboard on the birthday thing…especially with me…they had way, WAY too much fun with my single digit birthdays. I had moon bouncers and pony rides and cotton candy vendors and lots of area kids were invited. I always had a lot more friends in school right around my birthdays.

Jake walked in just as I was sitting down at one of the place settings. Suddenly a dim memory from the morning hit me. "Oh crud, Jake, did you get the message that Seth left for you this morning? I left a post it on the fridge for you."

He smiled with a slight twinkle in his eye. I wasn't sure if it was thanks to Alice and Rose blabbing about our conversation or if he was just remembering what had kept him from answering his own phone when Seth had called. I was actually hoping more for the first than the second…ugh…I didn't like thinking about my family in THAT way! "Yeah Leeny, I got it…thanks."

"No prob." I said looking back down at my plate in an attempt to not extend the conversation. It was then that the house phone rang again. My father was closest and answered and then I heard him say, "Yes, she's here. Just a moment please. Lina? It's for you."

I got up and went over to pick up the receiver expecting it to be one of my friends changing meet up arrangements or something. "Hello?" I was completely shocked to hear Seth's voice on the line…

"Hi Lina, it's Seth."

I blushed reflexively and turned so I was facing away from my family so they wouldn't see. Seth called for _me_? "Oh Hi!" I responded a bit too excitedly to be as casual as I was hoping to sound.

"Sorry to bother you or anything, I had some free time here at work and thought I'd call and see what happened with your auditions."

He was thinking about me at work? Huh… "Wow…well thanks for thinking of me. I'm not technically supposed to know yet, but Alice just revealed that I actually got the Lead…I'm playing Sandy in Grease! I was totally shocked!"

"Wow!" he genuinely sounded excited for me, and this made me smile even wider. "That's really great Lina, congratulations."

"Thanks. I'm really excited…I never dreamed I would land that role. Of course I did have two sisters help with fashion and some of the acting bits. I went in hoping for a small role or stage crew or something, just to kind of be part of something. To be honest I'm really nervous. I hope I can pull it all off."

"I'm sure you'll be great." He said encouragingly. "Oh…hey listen, my work line is ringing and I'm expecting an important call. I just thought I'd call and see how things went."

"Thanks Seth. Hope the call goes well…bye."

"Bye"

I hung up the phone and turned to see my whole family watching me with goofy grins on their faces.

"What?" I asked…as if I didn't know.

From across the dining room I hear Emmett's voice begin crooning, "Lina and Seth, sittin' in a tree."

Before he could get another word out I took off after him as he disappeared out the back door into the night, but I could still hear his voice in the darkness singing "K-I-S-S-I-N-G"

"One of these days Emmett! One of these days!" I yelled back and slammed the door shut to block out the rest of his infantile tune.

The rest of the family were sitting at their places at the table laughing at us. It wasn't unusual for them to laugh at Emmett and I. I never seemed to be able to just ignore him like everyone else, which of course encouraged him to keep pestering me. It was a never-ending cycle.

Nessie, Jake and I ate the wonderful meal and then Nessie blew out the number 17 candles that had been placed on the Tiramisu before we dug in. It was an excellent way to end an otherwise fantastic day. Now I just had to be convincing enough at the meet up tonight that our parts were a surprise.

Nessie and Jake decided to ride along with me into town. I figured it was as much for security than anything…but I also knew to expect something else…

"So, you and Seth must have had a pretty great conversation this morning in order for him to call back tonight to see how things went, huh." Jake started leaning up between the two of us from his place in the back seat of my Shelby.

I shrugged, "It was a decent conversation. No big deal."

"He took a break from work to call, sounds like a bit more than a _decent_ conversation."

"Jake, stop. He lives 3,000 miles away. It's not like anything would ever come of it. Yes, he's cute. Yes, it was nice that he called. But that's it. He's a nice guy who called to see if I got a part in a play that I had told him about this morning. Case closed."

"I think she doth protest too much." Nessie whispered softly smiling over at me from the passenger seat.

"Not you too!" I pleaded rolling my eyes. "It's enough that Alice and Rose are constantly playing puppet master with my life, I don't need you two in on it too!"

"Hey, we're not playing puppet master, we're just pointing out the obvious." Jake said defensively.

"You mean like the fact that I have a date tomorrow night with the guy who will play my boyfriend in the play? My date is with Connor Cusak who is the one playing Danny."

"That's fortuitous." Nessie responded from her seat next to me. Leave it to Nessie to use the most flowery word available to respond.

"Yes it is." I replied decisively. "He's here and he's real and I actually have a date with him. You know, the potentially attainable one? So I think I'll focus my energy on the tangible one thank you very much."

They didn't say much more. I had hoped I didn't come off sounding too terribly snotty, but it was all true and I didn't see where developing a definitive crush on a boy I would never get to see would do me the slightest bit of good.

We pulled into the parking lot just as Riley's carload arrived. We all got out and I introduced Jake and Nessie to my friends. Lucas was the only one who had ever met them before, but thankfully they didn't really inspire the same tension in humans than my other family members did. They all joked and seemed relaxed together. Even though the list was supposed to be posted at 11, it was 11:30 before the list finally made its appearance. It all went exactly as Alice had said. We all cheered and hugged and danced together in joy. It was just as fun to celebrate with my friends as it had been with my family.

It wasn't all happiness though. Amy and Danya both gave me homicidal looks as they walked past our group. They were obviously not happy that I had gotten the lead instead of one of them. I just hoped that they didn't make our lives too terribly miserable in the weeks to come. Six weeks of rehearsals were ahead of us, but if they were on the warpath, I knew that they could easily make them feel like six years.

The gang decided we should celebrate with a trip to the Dairy Barn. It was open until midnight, so we could just barely make it in time to get some celebratory ice cream. We sat on the concrete picnic tables out front and developed some more tangible plans for the next night's outing so I could let my family know and then headed home around 1am. I was very grateful that Nessie and Jake were with me so I didn't have to worry about the time.

On the way home I thanked them for being so patient and coming in to town with me. Then I decided that even if it did bring more of an inquiry on my head, so was too curious not to ask something that had been on my mind all evening.

"Okay, now don't take this and run with it too far, I'm just curious. What exactly does Seth do at his job anyway that he would be working so late at night."

"Well, first of all, he is on the west coast so it wasn't as late as it was here." Jake began. "It was only 3pm there when he called. He owns his own web design company. He's actually really, really good at what he does. He's been hired to do some websites for some major production companies out of Vancouver for movies and TV shows even. It works out well for him because he can work at his own pace and set his own hours, which is useful when they need someone to patrol while the rest have to work. He makes excellent money at it on top of all."

"Wow! That's really great. Good for Seth! But wait? The pack still has to patrol?"

"Yeah, every once in a while a random nomad will wander in and out of the area. We guess that they're probably just following old scents from when the Cullens lived around there. They have faded a lot, but they've never really gone away completely."

"Those guys are so brave. I really think that is so cool how they protect their families and friends that way. If only all men were that brave."

Jacob puffed up at my positive comments about his friends. He knew that I included him in my observations and it made him feel good to be appreciated. He didn't get many chances to get his ego stroked these days. So it felt good to give him a nice ego boost to boot.

"You sure you don't want more chances to talk to Seth?" Nessie chimed in with a smile dancing around the corners of her mouth.

"Well, I don't mind _talking_ to him. I just don't want you guys pushing anybody on me. Especially somebody who's life is so very far away from my own. Friendship is cool though."

"So if he asks for your cell number I should give it to him?" she continued.

"Yes, Ness, if he asks for my cell phone number then you can give it to him." I sighed.

"Good, because I gave it to him an hour ago when he texted me."

"What?!" I yelped nearly running off the road.

"What? I knew you wouldn't say no. You're too nice for that."

"Okay, you're as diabolical as Rose and Alice…who's going to join the cult next? Bella? Mom?"

They both laughed at me as I tried desperately to make the crimson in my cheeks fade. I hated that my face always gave away my emotions even when I didn't want them to. I was embarrassed by the whole thing, but also kind of excited that Seth had wanted my number. _What is wrong with you, you idiot? Don't go crushing on a wolf from Washington. You want NORMAL, remember? Not a long distance crush on a "mythical" creature! Stupid, Juvenile, Idiot!_

I tried to turn my focus back to driving, but I was glad that Edward wasn't in the car with me because to spite my internal self-mutilation, my stomach was doing excited little flip-flops as I struggled to fight back a squeal.


	21. Chapter 21

**21. Thrills and Terrors**

I had expected the third degree again when I got home, but to my surprise the house was nearly empty with only Alice and Jasper left behind. I walked in to find them sitting on the couch in the front room watching a movie. Alice looked up at me with a huge grin as I walked through.

"Looked like you were having fun. Don't worry; I already laid out the itinerary for tomorrow for everyone. We're all set."

"So who got stuck with babysitting duty tomorrow night?"

"Stuck? Since when do Rose and I consider shopping a burden? Besides, you're on your own. We'll just be in close proximity just in case. If things go as well as they look you won't see us at all."

"Nice. So just you and Rose?"

"Oh no, actually we're all going with the exception of Carlisle and Esme."

"Ew, I have a feeling that the boys and Bella won't be too keen on shopping."

"Actually there's a car show three blocks away from your movie theater tomorrow night, so they're all going there and then Rose and I will join them when we're done shopping."

"Oh, well that's good. At least you won't all be bored! Where is everybody anyway? Hunting?"

"Yeah, We thought it was a good idea if we are going to be in such large crowds tomorrow. Jasper and I will go later tonight after everyone else returns home."

"Okay, well I'm really tired. I'm going to get some sleep."

Alice looked up at me frowning for a moment like she was confused and then looked up at me and smiled. "I have a feeling you won't be going to sleep for a little while yet."

"Oooookay, why not?"

"You can thank Nessie tomorrow." She replied with a crooked smile and wink.

I looked at her in confusion and then jumped as my phone began vibrating in my pocket as my text message alert ring tone began to sing. I reached and pulled out my phone flipping the top up to read the text message I had just received on the larger screen.

_Was just talking to Nessie and she said she thought you were still awake. Sleepy or are you up for a phone call?_

I stood there staring at the screen in disbelief…a phone call earlier and now a text. A large Cheshire Cat type smile spread across my lips as I turned from my siblings without another word and began walking up the stairs to my room as I texted back.

_I'm pretty wired, so a phone call would be cool. I don't think I'll be going to sleep anytime soon._

Okay, so maybe 30 seconds ago that wasn't entirely true, but it was now. It took less than a whole minute for my phone to ring.

"Hey Sandy." Seth said cheerfully

"Hey…how did the rest of your night go? Your work call go okay?"

"Oh yeah, better than okay actually. I landed a massive contract to construct a website for a big blockbuster coming out next summer. That's part of the reason why I decided to see if you were awake enough to talk. I'm too psyched to sleep just yet."

"Wow…well now it's my turn to say congratulations! It seems we both had pretty good days!"

His laughed sounded a little nervous. I didn't know if it was because of the stress of the big contract or because he was talking to me. I knew he was the cause of my nervous little butterflies…maybe he had a few of his own.

"So, were you convincing enough for your friends tonight?"

"I think so. It was so much fun to see them find out their parts. I think it's going to be a fun six weeks."

"Think?"

"Well, I was getting some pretty dirty looks from two of the other girls that got other roles. I have a bad feeling that one if not both may be a bit of a thorn in our sides throughout this whole thing."

"Ugh…those kind of girls rule your school too? I think every school has a few."

I laughed lightly, "Yeah, I think it might be some kind of karmic rule or something."

He joined me in my laughter for a few seconds and then we trailed off into silence. I began to fidget not really knowing what to say next. Finally he spoke up again.

"So Jake was telling me that he, Ness, and the Cullens are all following you on your first date tomorrow night."

I was SO glad that this was a phone conversation as I felt my face burn with heat. Why did it embarrass me for Seth to know I had a date? The only future I might hope for with Seth is one of friendship, and yet I couldn't control the flood of emotion that rolled through my body in a massive wave. Maybe it wasn't the fact that he knew I had a date as much as that I was going to have eight babysitters tagging along just in case.

"Yeah, it's a triple date thing with a group of friends. The guy who asked me to go along is actually the one who plays Danny in the play. He seems like a pretty nice guy and Edward said that from what he's read of him that he's a decent guy. I really don't even know him all that well yet, but I am looking forward to going out. I'm extremely nervous though." Just like I am now and will probably ramble tomorrow night like this too.

"Oh…" he seemed like he was searching for the right thing to say. "Well just try to enjoy yourself. Dating is an important rite of passage for every teen. You should just go and have fun and be yourself. Everything else will just fall into place if you're just yourself. Trust me."

Strangely enough, I did. There was just something about Seth that inspired trust in people, even when they barely knew him. "Thanks." I said a bit awkwardly, not really knowing what else to say.

"So what are you guys doing for your date anyway?"

"The nearest bigger city is Clarksburg, so we're going there for dinner and a movie and then if it's open we're going to a little amusement park place with go carts, batting cages, miniature golf, and bumper boats. It's pretty low key, but will probably be pretty fun. It's pretty much the group that I hang out with at school all of the time, so that helps some. I think I'd probably be totally freaking out if it weren't a group thing."

"Sounds like fun."

"Yeah…I think it will be. Okay, I'm sick of talking about me. I want to hear more about this movie that you got the contract for. Have I heard of it?"

"Probably, but I'm not allowed to discuss it yet. I had to sign a non-disclosure agreement and everything."

"Wow, so that's pretty big! Promise you'll tell me more when you're allowed?" I said with a smile realizing that I was expecting this friendship, as tenuous as it was at the moment, to last a while.

I could hear a smile in his voice too as he answered. "You bet!"

I let out an involuntary yawn, which I heard mirrored a half second later on the other end of the line.

"Those are contagious," Seth joked, "But it really does sound like you're ready for bed."

"Oh Wow!" I exclaimed looking at the clock. "It's already almost 3am here! No wonder I'm yawning!"

We both laughed a little and said our goodbyes. I smiled as I got ready for bed. Seth was easy to talk to. Yeah, I was a little nervous because I'm the goofy teenage girl who can't help but get butterflies anytime I get attention from any cute boy, even if he's only a friend. I was half asleep when my head hit the pillow and I was out before I had a chance to think anymore, but my dreams were far from peaceful.

**I walked out on the stage dressed in Sandy's initial sweet and innocent outfit for the show with my hair in a ponytail. The auditorium was completely dark with the exception of a single spotlight trained on the middle of the stage. I walk toward the light trying to see who, if anybody, were there. Raising my hand to shield my gaze I squinted into the darkness looking for signs of life. Suddenly the stage lights come up to find that I am completely surrounded by an army of hooded soldiers who held no weapons. They were all around me dressed in cloaks ranging from deep black to dark gray. My heart began to pound in my chest as though it were about to escape its cavity.**

**My entire life I had heard stories of this mythic army that might some day come for me as an excuse to attack my family. The Volturi, as they are known in vampire culture, are led by three ancient vampires who have "kept the order" of vampire life for over 2,000 years. I immediately recognized the faces of the three leaders who stood just a foot in front of me looking into the darkness of the auditorium holding hands as the highest ranking vampire Aro communicated with the other two in his special way that is similar to Edward's except far more thorough and limited by a need to have physical contact with the person who he reads. I had seen their faces many times on the portrait in my father's study that was made shortly after my father had been transformed over 300 years ago.**

**My family had encountered the Volturi several times before, the last nearly resulting in the decimation of the entire family and their friends. This group of supposedly judicious vampires was actually quite power hungry and often found excuses to squash covens that appeared to be particularly powerful in order to destroy any chance of overthrow and to also add to their collection of warriors with exceptional abilities. One of the laws that was of typical use to them was the very one that I was a violation of. Humans were never to know of the existence of vampires.**

**I started to shake as I began to realize that I had about a dozen of the hideous red eyes closest to my position trained on my face. From the descriptions I had heard I immediately recognized Felix and Demitri on either side of me, each with an ice-cold hand on one of my shoulders. Just in front of me the child sized Jane and her twin brother Alec looked at me with twisted pleasure. Jane looked forward to being allowed to torture my mind into writing pain. If I were lucky Aro would order Alec to enact his skill on me instead. Then at least I would be anesthetized to the pain of death, neither hearing, seeing, nor feeling my fate. Renata, Aro's servant who provided him with a shield from a physical attack fluttered nervously directly in front of me looking worriedly into the darkness of the seats that stretched out in front of us.**

**Suddenly I found myself wishing that I was a vampire too…all of the key players were within a foot or two of me in every direction, even Chelsea behind me who's ability mentally forged the devotion amongst the guard that held them bonded together…if I only had the strength, I could save my family forever from their hateful lust for power. My shaking turned from fear to anger as the realization hit me that I would never, even as a vampire, be strong enough to save my family. No vampire could go up against the guard solo and survive, even with Bella's shielding ability, it was impossible…much less me, a simple, helpless, fragile human.**

**In that same moment that my mind fantasized of taking out the Volturi for my family the house lights rose revealing that what had held the Volturi's interest in the dark expanse beyond had been my waiting family. I looked out to see my parents and siblings, Jake's russet wolf incarnation, Nessie standing next to him with her fingers intertwined in his thick coat, and many other vampires some of which I did know and others I didn't. Tears finally crested over the ridges of my eyelids as I saw the terror in the eyes of my family members, every one of their eyes trained on mine. I was horrified to see that their most powerful defensive weapon, my sister Bella, was not among the faces of my loved ones.**

**I wanted to scream as I realized that after they were finished with me, my family would be next, and there would be nothing to protect them from the powers of Jane and Alec that will incapacitate them and leave them as defenseless lambs for slaughter. Then I saw more and more people appear, the entire pack was there along with their terrified wives and children. I saw Sam's Emily holding her children against her chest as tears of defeat rolled down her face, all the others were the same, as if they all were aware that they were next, the Volturi would leave no one behind this time. The last eyes I saw were those of Seth, still for some reason in his human form with a small boy with dark hair and light eyes and a small baby dressed in pink in his arms.**

**Suddenly I was filled with total rage. I hated the Volturi and I wanted to save my family and friends even if I didn't know how, I hated myself for being the excuse for the Volturi to rain down destruction on all those I loved and cared for. Once again I was the curse bringing pain and destruction on them all. Suddenly I was no longer sweet innocent Sandy. I was now dressed as a tougher version of Sandy in the final scene of the play. My hair was down and shorter and over the traditional Sandy costume I wore a leather jacket and studded bracelets on my wrists. My boots were strong and I could feel the heavy presence of steel toes. They weren't going to just take me down without a fight, and they certainly weren't going to take out my family and all of these innocent loved ones of the pack members without me at least trying to help. My back tensed and I prepared to act, as useless as it would be. I looked back at the crowd taking in the faces of my loved ones and friends one last time and whispered "I'll love you always and I'm sorry."**

I sat up in my bed screaming hysterically pulling my knees up to my chest. In an instant my parents, Rose, Emmett, and Bella were all standing in my room looking as hysterical as I felt. I couldn't stop screaming as I stared at them with frantic eyes as I looked into the faces that held almost exactly the expressions on their faces as in my dream. My mother ran to my side and held me in her arms as I sat there frozen in a tight ball on my bed. I'm not sure when I stopped screaming, but I found that instead of screaming I was shaking my head back and forth and mumbling under my breath. "No, not my family, not because of me, not because of me." They tried to calm me down, to coax out of me what was wrong, but I couldn't say it, I couldn't say anything more than my barely audible mantra. It was a couple of minutes before Edward was sitting in front of me on the bed with my face cradled between his hands.

He paled as he read the visions of my own personal hell repeating over and over in my mind. "Lina…Lina, It was just a dream sweetheart. It wasn't real. The Volturi aren't here. We're all safe. Come on, Lina, come on look at me."

My eyes finally focused and found his eyes as my mumbling stopped as a calm swept over me like a soft blanket, swaddling me in peace and love. I was so lost in my world of terror, I hadn't even realized that Alice and Jasper had come home too. Tears began to roll down my face in relief as I laid my head down on my mother's shoulder and placed my hands on top of Edward's, relieved that the scene in front of my eyes now was real and tangible.

Now satisfied that I was okay my father spoke up, "What's wrong? What happened?"

_I can't Edward, I can't talk about it. Please tell them…and tell them I'm sorry._

He took his hands away from my face, turning them over so that they held mine and kissed the back of my hands softly. "You have nothing to apologize for. She had a dream that the Volturi were here and were about to kill her and we were next and Bella wasn't there to protect us. We weren't alone either. They were going to use her as an excuse to wipe out the pack and their families too." He explained, his eyes never leaving my face and looking more deeply concerned as I cringed at his abbreviated retelling of my nightmare.

A low collective hiss escaped the lips of my family as my mother held me tighter in her arms humming softly into my hair. I didn't hear any more discussion, but there was a sudden bustle about me as my family members fanned out on different tasks given by my father. Bella was quickly back at my side sitting a warm cup of chamomile tea on my bedside table and asking Edward to trade places with her. She cupped my cheek in her hand and then gently stroked my hair.

"It wasn't all that long ago that I was the human constantly worried that my existence would risk this family. The memories are dim, but they are still there. I don't believe it will come to that though. Please don't worry Lina." She crooned as she reached forward and kissed me on my forehead.

It took ten minutes for me to finally relax and settled back in my bed, the worst of my terror behind me. I couldn't forget my dream completely though, I kept thinking of my burning desire to do something, ANYTHING to help my family. I didn't know how, but I was determined that someday I was going to find a way to not be a silent victim.


	22. Chapter 22

**22. Pain, Solace, and Surprises**

I was still in a daze sitting at the dining room table, the concerned expressions of my family still trained on my face. I don't remember getting dressed or making my way to my seat, yet here I was. The plate of food in front of me on the table lay untouched as I sat staring at it shivering occasionally at the memory of my nightmare. I kept thinking of the feelings I had in my dream…particularly the part where I was the only excuse the Volturi had to come. If that excuse no longer existed then maybe it would never come true. The only way to stop it would be to have my family…

Edward slammed his fist down on the table so hard I thought I heard the wood splinter slightly. A fury I had never seen before enveloped his face as he growled through clenched teeth, "No! Absolutely not!"

_It's the only way_, I responded in my mind.

"It was a dream Lina, a dream. Alice hasn't seen it in a vision. It was just a manifestation of your subconscious fears. There is no reason to believe that it will happen and no reason for you to even consider it!"

The rest of the family looked confused only hearing half of the argument, so I decided to respond out loud. "It's not worth the risk of even the slightest possibility that it could come true Edward. My staying human for a few more years is not worth the lives of so many." I began to shake as the anger returned to my body and now I was the one speaking through clenched teeth, "They WILL NOT destroy innocent women and children because of me! I'll go and commit suicide before I'll EVER allow that. MY life is not worth the lives of so many. One way or another, this dream will never, ever happen!"

My family all stared at me with wide eyes looking even more ghostly pale than ever. They had never heard me say things like this, much less with such determination. As the realization of how far I was willing to go to keep everyone safe hit them, involuntary growls rumbled in succession about the dining room. Suddenly I was practically knocked down by the sound of my entire family yelling in unison.

_Don't you ever talk that way again! It won't come to that. __**I'll change her myself before I let her try to go off herself! **__Edward, you have to talk her out of this!!! Don't let her do this! __**Maybe it's for the best; better than her trying to go do something stupid. **__Lina, it was a dream, don't be stupid! __**Honey, You have no way of knowing it will come true!**_

My mind was reeling with the over stimulation. Finally reaching my limit I stood up and pounded my own fist on the table with a resounding crack that sent pain shooting up my arm. I was too upset to care. I yelled as loudly as I could, **"ENOUGH!"** They all looked at me again, mouths agape. My father stepped over and tried to take my hand to examine it, but I pulled it away. "You're not listening to me. Please hear me. It may not be today, but someday they will come and they will use me as their excuse. If we don't do this then it will mean the end of us all. I've lived my whole life with you. You are my family, my whole life, what sacrifice would it honestly be? You're all I have ever known. I understand better than any human, including Bella, ever could what it means, how hard it will be, how things will change…but not all the changes will be bad. And probably best of all, you'll be free from the burden of having to take care of me."

They all stared at me as I finished my speech and placed my now screaming hand back in the waiting hands of my father. He was the only one who moved as the rest sat frozen mentally calculating and evaluating the things I had just said.

"Well, I believe it's just fractured, but we'll need to take an x-ray to be sure. I think you will just need a brace." He then turned me to look at him, still the only one making any movements in the room, and smoothed my hair back from my face with a gentle caress of his hand. "Listen to me please. Someday, no matter what the state of your mortality, the Volturi will choose to return. Even if we changed you today, they will some day find a reason to return. Transforming you will not change that or possibly even delay it. Not only that, but we have long suspected that when they do return their focus will include the packs and their descendants." Several of the statues filling the room turned to look at my father in shock. I'm guessing this was a private theory that had not been shared with the rest of the family prior to this.

My father then reached and pulled me into a loving hug, kissing the top of my head. "You have always taken far too much responsibility for the hardships of this family on yourself when most of them were set in motion before you were ever even born my darling. If someday you decide to be transformed because it is something you truly want for your own life, then we will discuss it again. But as we've said time and time again, we will not change you just for the sake of the safety of people who will be in peril regardless of that change."

I melted into my fathers embrace as my body began to convulse with involuntary sobs. Suddenly I realized that there was nothing I could do. I was so exhausted that I could no longer find the strength to stand. My father picked me up easily in his arms and carried me up to the room that housed the x-ray equipment and sat me delicately down, adjusting the machine to take the needed pictures of my damaged hand. The pain that still radiated from my hand was nothing in comparison to the pain in my heart. After he was finished he carried me to my bed and tucked me in. He left and came back a few minutes later with a glass of water and two white pills.

"For the pain," he said softly handing them to me.

"Thanks." I took them and swallowed them weakly. I settled back in my bed. While my exhaustion was overwhelming, I still couldn't seem to really relax. No sooner had the memory crossed my mind than Edward was standing by my bed motioning for me to move over. He crawled in next to me and pulled his arms around me just like he had done when I was little and hummed my lullaby. I tried to let the memories of how safe I had felt in my brother's arms as a small child take over the gaping sadness that currently filled my chest with dark vehemence. I felt Edward sigh as he listened to my thoughts struggling to grab hold of more pleasant memories. He gently kissed the top of my head and continued to hum my tune and I finally relaxed and drifted off into sleep once more.

~*~*~*

I opened my eyes to find that Edward had not left me throughout my slumber. I looked over at the clock, which now read 2:15pm. I had completely forgotten until this moment about my plans for the evening, which included meeting my friends in less than an hour. I started to jump to panic mode when Edward whispered to me…

"It's okay. Alice saw that you weren't going to be feeling well enough to go, so Esme called and told them that you broke your hand and were in too much pain to go and that you were sleeping thanks to the pain medication. They said that they were sorry and that you'll reschedule as soon as you feel better."

A wave of relief washed over me as the pain of my hand really began to make itself known. Up until this moment my emotional pain had dominated over the physical pain that now gripped my mind. Edward reached over handing me two more of the little white pills my father had given me before I had fallen asleep and a glass of water. I took them and then laid back down resting my screaming hand on my brother's cool arm. His cool skin was more soothing than any ice pack.

He sighed deeply and then began, "I'm so sorry about all of this Lina. I wish I could make you understand how important it is to me that you get to do all the things that you want to do in your life. You are so amazing just as you are. Every day you surprise me with how capable you are. You are so brave and smart and caring and strong."

I let out a sarcastic laugh, "Strong? Brave? You're kidding right?"

He looked at me in exasperation shaking his head slightly. "You are so like your sister! Yes brave and strong…do you realize that most teenagers wouldn't be able to even come close to dealing with the secrets and complications that you do? Trust me, I see their minds and they are all so easily broken, frightened, and selfish. Not one of the those kids in that high school would ever be willing to go to the extremes that you are to save anybody else. No way, no how!"

I shrugged not knowing how to respond. That wasn't bravery in my mind it was just common sense.

"Exactly! You don't see your actions as anything more than commonplace, but they are Lina. They truly are. I don't want to see you stop now, to be trapped as a teenager for the rest of eternity when I know that if you just allow yourself to keep going you're just going to keep blossoming. I honestly believe that someday you will be the most dazzling of us all."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. My family have always worn such rose colored glasses when it comes to me. They have always seen more than was really there. I guess such as it is with love, be it romantic or familial. I was just about to drift off when Edward sat up a little and then looked at me with a little smirk.

"You have company."

I looked at him completely confused as I heard the sound of a car engine pull up in front of the house and shut off. "Who?"

"It seems your date has come to you." He said with his trademark crooked smile just as the door opened to my room and my sisters came in to usher Edward out and help me get dressed to come down and greet my visitor.


	23. Chapter 23

**23. Sweet Gestures**

I slowly made my way downstairs with the assistance of Alice and Rose. They had helped me comb my hair and dress quickly. After I was suitably attired and free of bed head they gently lead me down the stairs because the medicine my father had left for me left me quite a bit less coordinated than usual. It wasn't until I was on stable ground that I looked up to see Connor standing by the front door with a bouquet of flowers waiting for me.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" He asked with a concerned look.

I raised my right hand, now secured in a black brace and sling, slightly with a small wince, "Uh, I've definitely been better." He nodded in agreement.

"Well, when your Mom called and told me that you broke your hand and weren't going to be able to come tonight I thought I'd see if you minded if I hung out here with you tonight. I didn't see tagging along as a 5th wheel. I brought along a few movies." He said raising the bag in his other hand hopefully as he handed me the beautiful bouquet of lilies, freesia, and lavender.

"Oh, that's so sweet. Thank you…these are gorgeous," I added with a big smile. Even with my hand screaming, I still managed to feel a twinge of warmth at the sweet gesture.

"Here Lina, let me get those for you." Rose said reaching for the flowers. Alice had already disappeared into the kitchen to get a vase to place them in and was halfway back to us doing her best to maintain human speed. They placed the flowers in the vase and Alice sat them on the mantle in the living room.

Connor flushed a little as his gaze moved over to my beautiful sister. I decided now was the time to begin introductions with the focus of his gaze. He looked very nervous meeting all of my family members, but not really as disturbed as most people look when they meet them. It was really more of an embarrassment that most people get when meeting a date's family for the first time.

After introductions were over I offered a seat to Connor and went to sit next to him on the couch. My mother came by and helped me get settled with my arm propped up on a pillow on the arm of the couch and an ice pack to help with the swelling and then we were abruptly alone. I knew they were all nearby, but had intentionally cleared out the living room to give us some semblance of privacy.

I finally broke our brief silence. "So what movies did you bring?"

He smiled widely knowing he covered his bases, "I didn't know what kind of mood you were in so I got one of every genre." He pulled out a stack of five movies ranging from comedy to horror. I knew immediately that horror was most certainly out.

"How about a comedy? After my day today I could use a good laugh."

"Yeah, what exactly happened with your hand anyway?" I froze…I hadn't really been rational enough to think up an excuse yet and the medication had me slightly hazy and unable to think for a moment. He was looking at me expectantly and I just sat there drawing a total blank. To my relief my mother walked in at that moment to help me out. She had obviously been listening from the kitchen.

"Would you kids like anything to eat or drink? We have quite a selection." We both shook our heads and Connor mumbled a no thank you. "Okay, well if you change your mind, help yourself, but please be careful. We waxed the floors yesterday and they are really slippery. Poor Lina had no clue and went right down this morning. Unfortunately she tried to catch herself with her hand or else she would have only had a bruised bottom!"

I sighed and shot her a nonverbal thank you with my eyes in response to which she just smiled at me. "Let me know if you need anything at all dear."

"Thanks Mom."

After she was safely out of the room Connor finally spoke up again, "Wow, they must really take their waxing seriously around here!"

I just laughed self-consciously and asked if he thought he could figure out the DVD player or if he needed help. I knew he could handle it…it wasn't complicated and I had all of the remotes to do all of the operations. As the movie was just beginning he jumped up and went back over to where he had left the bag of movies by the TV and dug something out to bring back to me.

"I almost forgot, I picked us up some movie food while I was there. You did say you like peanut M&M's right?"

I smiled widely at him as he handed me the bag. I didn't think he would remember that I had told him that. "Yummm…thank you! I can't believe you remembered!"

We turned our attention to the movie that was just getting started and watched from the couch occasionally glancing at one another throughout the movie. I couldn't believe that I was sitting here in my own house watching a movie with a cute boy. It was all so new to me to have anybody outside of my family wanting to spend any time with me. It felt nice.

When the movie was over my mother floated back through with offers of supper. We opted for a frozen pizza and sat in the family room talking and eating the rest of the evening. Connor was easy to talk to. It was a nice relaxing evening that seemed to end all too soon. When it came time for Connor to leave he came over and squatted down in front of me on my side of the couch and took my good hand in his own. My chest began to flutter with his touch.

"Well, I hate to go. I've had a great time, but my parents are really strict on the curfew thing. I hope you get to feeling better soon."

I smiled at him blushing slightly at the sweet gesture. "I had a great time too. Thank you so much for the flowers and movie and M&M's."

"Goodnight Lina." He said as he bent and gave my hand the softest sweetest kiss and then he got up and walked over to the front door. He turned and bid my family in the kitchen goodbye and walked out to his car. I sat there in my seat on the couch with a wide smile fighting the urge to squeal. My first date, even if it were just movies at my own house, went so well…a precious memory to add to my mental treasure chest.

After a few minutes of basking in the afterglow, I slowly made my way to the kitchen to bid my family goodnight. I knew they needed no recap because they had heard the whole thing from their various places throughout the house. Turning down my brother Jasper's offer of help getting back up to my room, I made my way back upstairs and changed into a fresh pair of pajamas. I took the two pain pills sitting by my bed in anticipation for my turning in and climbed into bed trying my best to focus on the positive things of my day and push out bad ones.

I was just about to drift off to sleep when my cell phone began to ring. I picked it up looking at the caller ID. My stomach tensed up when I saw who was calling.

"Hello?"

"Hey there Sandy. How was the date?" Seth's voice asked in what almost seemed like a forced cheerfulness.

"Hi Seth. It didn't really go according to plan. It's been a long day."

Suddenly his voice came back with unveiled concern, "What happened? Is everything okay?"

"Not quite. It's a long story…but to really abbreviate it, I broke my hand and didn't feel like going out. Mom canceled for me since I was asleep on pain meds, but then the guy came over and brought movies and we hung out here instead, so it ended up still being a date after all, not just the one we had planned."

"Whoa, wait! How did you break your hand?"

I was glad he didn't see the blush that filled my face, "I sort of hit the dining room table…"

"Whyyyyy?"

"That's the long story part."

"I've got time." He wasn't going to let it go so I decided to just be honest. I told him all about my dream and the terror it left me in. It was hard to tell it all and relive it, but at the same time it was somewhat cathartic to get it out at the same time. I could practically feel him tense as I continued on, conveniently leaving out his role in the dream.

"Wow, rough night huh? That sounds terrifying, but it doesn't explain why you would hit the table."

I didn't necessarily want to tell him this part and I wasn't sure why. I described the scene and discussion from this morning and I heard him suck his breath in reflexively when I got to the part about wanting to be changed or taking care of the issue myself. He waited until I was finished before he spoke again.

"Your family is right Lina. Please promise me you won't do anything stupid like that. I've been face to face with the Volturi and they are right, if they want us, they will come after us eventually regardless of you. I love your family, but I'd really much rather see you live a nice long life. You owe yourself that."

I laughed darkly, "You sound like Edward."

"He's a smart man, your brother. You know he wanted so badly for Bella to have as full of a human life as possible."

"I know. Trust me, I know!" I moaned rolling my eyes.

He laughed lightly. "Well, I probably should get off of here and let you get some rest so you can heal up. You get better soon okay?"

"I'll try. Goodnight Seth."

"Sleep tight Lina"

I shut off my phone and lay there thinking about how nice it had been to be able to talk to someone outside of my family and tell them the whole truth instead of constantly lying like I had to do with my other friends. I was so glad Seth called. It felt like he made the night complete. A strange twinge caught in my stomach the second I thought about how nice it was to talk to Seth. Guilt? Why did I feel guilty? I drifted off to sleep glad to have ended the day with some good memories to help chase the bad ones away.


	24. Chapter 24

**24. A Beautiful Day for a Drive**

From the moment I woke up and managed to reply to the first of my many text messages that had come while I was sleeping I was fielding endless phone calls from my friends. Leighton was first asking if I was feeling better and wanting all of the juicy details from my night in with Connor. As I had suspected the original invitation for Connor was in hopes that he would invite me and when I wasn't able to go she slipped the slightest of hints that he should come over and check on me. She was pleased that he had taken it a step further with the flowers, candy, and movies. "If he'd brought along a piece of jewelry he would forever be known as the perfect man." She had joked when she heard of how sweet he had been.

Malia was next and I pretty much repeated the first conversation verbatim. Lucas and Riley called once Malia hung up and were joking with me all morning that we were going to have to cover my house in bubble wrap to keep me from killing myself. As I had suspected, they had already talked to Connor and gotten most of the major details. I called Connor after getting off with the twins to thank him again for being so sweet and considerate the night before. He asked if I was feeling better and if I felt like going for a car ride today just to get out of the house. I was excited at the idea of getting out and spending more time relaxing with Connor, he was very easy to talk to, although it did suck that I always had to be on guard with what I said. It would be way too easy to let something slip with him. We planned for him to pick me up at 1pm so we could have some lunch first. By this time it was already 11.

I drug myself out of bed and hopped in the shower, which was far more difficult than usual having to use my left hand to do everything. I had never realized how extremely right handed I was until I was trying to do everything without it! After I was clean and dry and halfway clothed I called for reinforcements. Bella came up to help me finish up with my clothes, combing and drying my hair and doing a light dusting of makeup. It was so refreshing to have an assistant who wasn't doing their best to make me look glamorous. Bella knew what I liked and helped me accomplish it and then left me to my own devices for the next hour.

I made my way downstairs to attempt to make a sandwich left-handed. This was yet another disaster leading to Emmett stepping in elbowing me out of the way showing me how to make a "manly" sandwich. When he was done I was left holding a sandwich so thick that I wouldn't have been able to fit it in my mouth even with two hands to hold it with. I gave up taking it to the table and pulling the filler out and eating it instead of trying to actually eat it as a sandwich.

While I attempted to eat I got a text from Seth. Texting left-handed was not exactly easy either. I was used to using both thumbs on my qwerty keyboard. I finally gave up laying the phone on the table and pecking the buttons with my index finger. He was off to LA in a couple of hours to meet with the director and producer of the movie that his big contract was based on to bounce ideas back and forth as to what they wanted to see on the website. He was really excited because this was definitely the first truly big time meeting he had ever taken and he hoped he came off professional enough. He was worried that since he looks like an older teen still instead of the adult that he truly was that they might not take him for the professional that he is. I told him not to worry about it because he was going to do great and wished him luck. He promised to text me later tonight to let me know how it all went.

Before I knew it, Connor was on the front porch ringing the doorbell. I hadn't finished my lunch yet, but I was more excited to get going with Connor. I walked out the front door and came face to face with a fire engine red Dodge Viper. My brothers were already out front drooling over it.

"Holy crap! Now that's what I call a car!" I had forgotten that Connor came from a wealthy family. Leighton had told me that the first day of school, but Connor is so down to earth that it was easy to forget.

He smiled deviously, "My Dad lets me borrow her a few times a year on very special occasions."

"Taking me driving is considered a special occasion?"

"Well, he took pity on us since we missed out on going to the city for our first real date. He wanted me to be able to do something special to make up for it."

"Like you coming here last night with flowers and movies and hanging around here all night wasn't special enough. It was very sweet." I said with a shy smile.

He smiled looking down at his feet like he was embarrassed and then walked over to the door and opened it for me motioning for me to get in. The car was immaculate. It looked like it had just been driven off the lot and brought directly to my doorstep. Connor closed the door for me and started making his way around to the driver's side when Alice came running out with a hair tie.

"Looks like you're going to need this," she said smiling. "Here, turn around and I'll put your hair up out of the way for you."

"Thanks Alice."

"Always!" she cheerfully teased back with a wink.

My brothers reluctantly stepped back and allowed Connor to take off, but not before giving him semi-menacing looks of warning in reaction to which Connor stiffened in his seat and gripped the wheel even tighter.

"Never mind them," I said with a laugh, "They're just being over-protective as always."

He looked at me trying his best to smile convincingly in my direction and then made his way up our drive very cautiously. Once we were out of sight he picked up the pace, but was still not pushing the car anywhere near the limits that I would take it to in his shoes. I found myself wondering if he always drove like this or if it was just due to my presence in the car. I finally decided to come right out and ask.

"Are you being cautious on my account or are you always this cautious with this baby?"

He looked over with a big mischievous smile and mashed the pedal down speeding us up well beyond the speed limit, but still about ten miles below my typical self imposed speed limit. I didn't want to diminish his manhood by letting on so I let out an enthusiastic 'Wahoo' throwing my good arm in the air and waving it in the wind blowing past the open sunroof. It was a beautiful day for a drive.

We spent the whole day driving all around the area. I really hadn't had much opportunity to explore the area very much yet and really enjoyed some of rare places of beauty that Connor shared with me. My favorite was in the nearby forest preserve. At the base of two fairly large mountains, well large for this region at least, there was this beautiful little valley that stretched deep into a long mountain pass and from the road where we sat you could see a tall and slender waterfall cascading down a cliff at the apex of the pass. At first glance it looked as though the sheer face was relatively close, but upon closer examination I determined that it was an optical illusion an in fact the beautiful ribbon of water was actually somewhere between 7 to 10 miles away. I got the feeling that this was probably Connor's favorite too since he had saved it for last and just in time to see the sun set casting beautiful orange and golden beams of light on the distant rock face making it glitter like it were made of pure gold.

We were parked in a scenic overlook along the side of the road and got out to sit on the rock wall and watch the beautiful scene as we talked. Connor had packed a surprise picnic meal for supper and we sat there for several hours just chatting away as the darkness of the night crept in around us, but we didn't really seem to notice.

We talked about our families, our friends, and school. We both came from fairly big families and to spite the inherit differences in our family lives, most of which Connor had no clue about, we kept finding an astonishing number of similarities. He was also the youngest with a very Emmett like older brother who tortured him nearly as much as me until he went off to college last year in California. He admitted that to spite the torture, he really did miss his brother. I could relate to that, even though he drove me bonkers I couldn't imagine an Emmett free household. He had a beauty queen older sister who sounded quite Rosalie like that had married a rich doctor and was now living on Park Avenue in New York. He didn't miss her quite as much though. From the stories he shared, she sounded like ten times the diva that Rose is, which was actually more than just a little bit frightening!

There was something that bothered me when we started talking about our friends though. There was a strange sadness there that I couldn't quite pinpoint. I decided not to push it. As we talked more I discovered that he really liked school and hated going home. Unlike myself who had a house full of people to come home to every night, his parents were workaholics and he rarely saw them. It had only been a fluke that his Dad was even around today to let him borrow the Viper. Most nights he came home to a supper cooked by a staff cook after which he was entirely alone in the large house. He sounded very sad when he talked about it and I could see that the loneliness was very hard for him. I decided that I had the better deal and I wouldn't push too much of my family woes on him except to talk about how lonely I felt at times, especially on the dreaded Valentine's Day when I was the only singleton in a house full of illustriously happy couples. I could tell that he really did understand what I was saying. I had a feeling that even when his parents were home, they weren't really there. I envisioned family suppers with him sitting alone eating while his father responded to emails on his laptop while his mom kept up with her texting on a blackberry.

I wasn't sure what his response would be, but I felt compelled to reach out to him and try to help him let go of some of the sadness and loneliness flooding his eyes and let him know that he wasn't alone. I slowly reached over with my left hand and put it on top of his right hand that was resting on his knee. He looked over at me and smiled slowly as he flipped over his own hand and intertwined his fingers in mine. My heart began to flutter and a bubbling warmth churned in my chest. We both turned back to look off in the distance as the last bit of light left our field of vision and the stars began to twinkle in the sky above us. The scene was absolutely breathtaking and my heart skipped a beat as I felt Connor shift over a little closer to me on our perch. He let go of my hand and wrapped his arm around my shoulders placing his hand gingerly on my right bicep, being careful not to strain my injury. I laid my head on his right shoulder wrapping my left arm behind his back letting my hand rest on his back and sighed. It really was very comfortable with Connor.

We sat there for quite a while listening to the cicadas chirping in the distant night until finally Connor looked at his watch.

"Ugh, I hate to say it, but if we want to make it back before curfew then we really need to leave." He got up and offered me his hand to help me stand up and continued to hold it as we walked back to his father's car. I found myself wondering how absentee parents were even around enough to enforce a curfew, but I didn't want to risk bringing any of the sadness back into his eyes.

He opened the door for me and waited for me to get in…but I paused for a minute standing in front of him. I could only partially make out his face in the light that shined out from the dome light of the car. "Thank you so much for an amazing day. I couldn't have asked for a better second date!"

She smiled wide and then leaned forward kissing me gently on the cheek and then allowed me to slide into my seat as he closed the door behind me. My hands were shaking and I was fighting with every fiber of my being to resist the squeal that was building in my head. I had just about gotten it under control when he opened the driver's side door and slid in next to me. He backed out slowly and then headed toward home, taking my hand again once he had shifted into the highest gear. It felt so good to be next to him, feeling the cool night air blowing in through the open windows and sunroof, and looking over to watch him in the pale white moonlight. I sighed in contentment as we rode through the night wishing I didn't have to go back home.

All too soon we were pulling back up the long drive to my house. When we got there I went to reach for the door handle but he told me to please wait and he got out and walked around and opened the door for me and gave me hand to assist me out of the car. He continued to hold my hand as he walked me up to the front door. When we reached our destination I turned to him and reached up hugging him around the neck with my free arm.

"Thank you again for the amazing day out. It was perfect, really perfect."

He rested his hands on my waist and smiled making that irresistible little dimple wink at me as his crystal clear sapphire eyes sparkled down at me. He leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead this time and then let go of me and opened the screen door so I could enter the house. I turned again bidding him goodnight and watched as he walked back out to the car. He waved back at me before sliding into the driver's seat and heading back up the long drive to the main road. I watched until I could no longer see his red taillights in the distance and then closed the door and turned to find I was face to face with a mob of smiling faces standing less than three feet away from me.


	25. Chapter 25

**25. Selfish**

The smiling mob looked at me expectantly wanting details of my day with Connor. I smiled back at them raising my eyebrows. They already knew what had happened. Between Alice, Edward, and whoever was most likely on Lina patrol that day, I was sure they already knew exactly what had happened throughout the course of the day.

"Sorry guys, she's not sharing today. She wants to keep this memory to herself for now." Edward explained from the back of the crowd.

I grinned wider and gave them all an exaggerated wink as I walked past them and made my way up to my room. I went straight to my dresser and got out my diary. I hadn't written in the thing in ages, but this was a day that I didn't want to forget. I spent the rest of the night writing about the things that happened and the feelings I had throughout my day with Connor. I was just finishing up and planning to get ready for bed when my cell phone alerted me that I had just received a text.

_Meetings went great. Got time to talk or is it too late there?_

It was nearing midnight and I knew that I should be getting to sleep, but I really wanted to hear how Seth's meetings had gone. It was obviously too involved to be covered sufficiently by texting. I sighed as I went into my contacts selecting Seth's cell and hit send.

"Hey there!" Seth answered more cheerfully than I had ever heard him before.

"Hi master of Hollywood!" I responded with a slight giggle. "So you had a good day I gather?"

"Nearly perfect."

"Only nearly? Why not absolutely perfect?"

"Absolutely perfect would be if I had someone out here to celebrate with me."

"Oh, so my cheerleading via the phone isn't good enough huh? I see how things are!"

He sighed a little, "Well sharing it with you definitely makes it better."

"Well it will be once you actually start sharing…so dish!"

He told me all about how arrogant and egotistical the guys had seemed when he first met them and how they had bristled when they saw him in person, but by the end of the meeting they were calling him son and raving about his ingenious ideas. He sounded so excited and euphoric and I couldn't help but beam for him. I was so proud of him and told him so several times.

After he had shared all of his elated experiences of the day he asked how mine had gone and I told him all about my drive with Connor. It felt a little strange to talk to him about it, so I didn't quite go into full detail. He listened quietly and said he was happy that I found someone that I enjoyed spending time with. He was kind and encouraging as usual, but some of the sparkle disappeared from his voice as we talked.

Yawns soon began to dominate the conversation after about forty minutes of sharing on both ends of the line and we decided it was time to call it a night. I went to my bed and nestled into my pillows replaying the events of my day in my mind. I thought of how lucky I was to have two people in my life that I could talk to so comfortably outside of my family. I was glad that my world was expanding beyond the confines of my parents and siblings. I fell asleep with a contented smiled on my face.

*~*~*~

The next morning I woke up and got ready for school. I ate breakfast with a small smile plastered on my face, still unwilling to share the details of my lovely day with Connor with my family. They really didn't know how to deal with my silence, so they eventually moved on to other topics and let me be as I went about my morning. Unfortunately driving was out of the question due to my shifting hand being incapacitated, so my father offered to drive me to school on his way in to the hospital.

We pulled in to the parking lot to find Connor parked next to my typical spot leaning on the trunk of his car waiting for me. When he saw us pull up in he smiled and waved. He came over to my door and opened it for me leaning down to greet my father.

"Hello Dr. Cullen."

"Hello Connor" my father responded with a smile. "Nice to see you, son."

"You too sir, and don't worry, I'll take good care of her today. Oh, and if you'd like, I can take her home after rehearsals tonight and save you guys a trip."

"Thank you, Connor, that's very kind of you to offer."

Connor offered me his hand and helped me out of the car taking my book bag from the floorboard and carefully closing the door to my father's car behind us. He smiled at me intertwining his fingers with those of my good hand and walked with me to the sophomore hall doors. Just before reaching the entryway we heard a shout from behind us. It was Lucas and Leighton running to catch up, both of them beaming us as they ran. Connor looked down at our hands and blushed for a moment with a slight frown, but quickly recovered.

Once they finally caught up Leighton was the first to speak, "Well, well look at you two so cozy." She said with a smile and a wink and then turned to Lucas, "Told you I was a good matchmaker."

I glanced over at Connor to see him blush even deeper and begin examining his feet with great interest.

Lucas rolled his eyes, "Yes, yes, you are the queen of the busybodies. Now can we please go inside and get settled so we can talk about next weekend. I really think we need to get some plans rolling for our rescheduled triple date before we all get too busy."

They walked past us and into the school as Connor and I watched them pass. We looked at each other and he shrugged and then led me into the school. He walked me to my locker and helped me unload my book bag and get my books out for my first class. I realized he must have actually been serious about the whole taking care of me thing as he carried my books for me to the commons.

We sat at the big circle table with the rest of the gang. As usual the snot squad was still sitting nearby, but they weren't included in the discussion we were having about weekend plans. It didn't take long for the warning bell to ring and Leighton offered to carry my books for me to class since Connor's class was on the opposite side of the building. He gave her a crooked smile that I hadn't actually seen before and thanked her for the help and then squeezed my hand lightly before letting it go and said he would see me in Trig as we parted ways.

The morning seemed to crawl along at a horribly slow pace. Without the constant distractions of being with Connor, I was beginning to find that the brace was more than a little annoying and was making my wrist itch. After first hour Leighton walked with me to my locker where Connor was waiting to help me with my books for Trig. All day long I found that if Connor wasn't standing outside a class waiting to help me to my next class that he had arranged for someone else to help instead. I thought it was going overboard. I did have one good hand after all and my books weren't all that heavy, but it was still very sweet.

My father sent a note to school with me to be excused from P.E. for the week so I wasn't made to dress and was allowed to sit with the rest of the class and watch as they finished physical fitness testing. I was glad it was testing so I didn't have to sit alone and watch everyone else. It would have been lonely and extremely boring. Instead I got to sit with Connor and the rest of the group as we kept discussing our plans for the next weekend.

After school was our first play rehearsal. As Connor and I walked down the aisle toward Mrs. J she saw my sling and began to freak out. I tried to calm her by explaining that I only had a fracture that should be healed in a week, but it was of little solace to the highly strung director. She finally calmed down after what seemed like an eternity of melodrama and brought our first rehearsal to order explaining the rehearsal schedule and expectations. Our first day was dedicated to being measured for costumes and instructed on things we need to do to prepare for the production. We were all instructed to begin learning our lines as we waited for our turn to go back stage for measurement and styling consultations.

I was one of the last cast members called back and was told to stand in front of a table of three individuals and turn slowly. They discussed various issues that needed to be addressed in costume design and styling. They discussed my body flaws and informed me that I had to dye my hair blonde. It was one of the most humiliating and frustrating thirty minutes of my life. It's not like girls don't have enough self confidence problems without a panel of snobs pointing out any and every imperfection…as if the residents of this small town expected perfection in a high school performance anyway! I listened trying not to take their suggestions to heart and was greatly relieved to be dismissed.

As Connor drove me home we compared our experiences behind stage. I was somewhat relieved to know that he was nearly as humiliated as I was. I couldn't believe how much they had nitpicked every little detail about the handsome boy next to me. In my opinion, he was far more attractive than any of the actors that I had ever seen in the role. He was just as upset over some of the things that had been said to me. It felt good to be able to vent to one another and encourage one another, and before I knew it I was home.

After supper and homework I took the time to text Seth and see how day two in LA was going. He called me back and we had a long conversation about our day. I didn't have much to tell besides sharing my humiliation in front of the advisory board at rehearsals and how pathetic I felt having everyone taking care of me at home and at school. I loved hearing about his day though. He had gotten to meet three major movie stars that were going to be in the movie during some photo shoots that were going to be used for the site he was producing and he also got to actually see a taping of a major pivotal scene in the movie on the studio back lot. I could tell he was having the time of his life. His day was capped off when he got to go to this majorly exclusive club with the director and two producers.

"Wait…what time is it there?"

"Nine, why?"

"You're already back from going out to an exclusive club? Isn't it a bit early?"

"Oh, no, actually I'm still here. I'm sitting out in the limo."

"What?! Are you nuts…you're out on the town in Hollywood hobnobbing with the film industry elite and you decide to ditch them and go sit in a car to talk to me?"

"Eh…They don't even know I'm gone and besides, sharing it all with you is half the fun. Like I said, the only thing that would make it perfect is to share it all with someone. Sharing it with you over the phone is as close as I can get."

I laughed shaking my head at his insanity. "You are one of a kind Seth Clearwater! Absolutely one of a kind!"

"Back atcha kid, but I'm guessing that you should really be going to bed by now huh? I keep forgetting it's so much later there."

"Yeah, you get to rub elbows with zillionaires while I have to get to bed so I can go to school tomorrow. Life is so unfair."

"Oh boohoo. I did my time, now it's your turn. Someday you'll rub elbows too if I know you. You'll probably be the big star that I can't even manage to get a meeting with!"

"Sure, and pigs will fly, and hell will freeze over, and money will grow on trees too!"

We both laughed and bid one another good night. I snuggled down into my comforter still shaking my head at the fact that Seth left a Hollywood party to talk to me. _That poor boy needs to find a girlfriend!_ I thought to myself. As soon as the thought reached the surface of my mind and a mental image formed with it my stomach felt heavy. I liked talking to Seth and being his person to share great things with. I didn't like thinking about having to share him with anybody. I felt so selfish…he's a great guy who deserves someone wonderful, and yet here I was begrudging him such happiness. _Ugh…I'm such a horrible person!_ I moaned at myself as I rolled over to bury my face in my pillows and try my best to fall asleep.


	26. Chapter 26

**26. A Friend To Lean ON**

The next four days went pretty much the same as Monday had. The worst part was trying to take notes in classes and then read them again later. My left handed chicken scratch looked for more like the pre alphabetic scribblings of a one year old! If Connor and the others hadn't been so kind as to photocopy their notes from classes for me I would never have been able to pass a test over any of the material covered that entire week. I was praying that Saturday would hurry so I could finally get the stinking brace off and resume life as a self sufficient individual again.

Connor continued to be a gentleman taking care of me all day and taking me home after rehearsals every night. There was never an awkward moment between us. Conversations seemed to flow so simply between us with very few lulls of silence. It was now natural to hold his hand, and I was now doing it without even thinking twice about it. Things were comfortable between us as they were, but we still hadn't bridged any new frontiers in our relationship. Besides the occasional kiss on the cheek or forehead when saying goodbye, there was no further "lip action" involved, which was okay with me because I was very nervous at the prospect of my first kiss. I knew he probably had more experience at this whole relationship thing than I did and I was really worried that I was going to be bad at it. For this reason, I was more than a little anxious about our weekend plans for our triple date.

Every night for the next four nights I also spent my last few waking minutes talking, or at the very least texting, with Seth. He had such an amazing week. He got to see more of the movie made, got to do personal interviews with some of the stars, and got to tour some of the major landmarks during his stay. His favorite part of the whole week was the beautiful weather and the unending sunshine, which of course made his Friday morning return to dreary La Push a bit of a downer.

"Everything just seems so gray here now." He complained as he talked to me while sitting in front of his living room window at home.

"Yeah, I'd kill to get to go somewhere sunny for a little while. I'd love to see California one day. Maybe I can talk Jake and Nessie into taking me sometime."

"That'd be awesome, maybe I could come down and meet you guys and show you all the stuff I saw this last week."

"Maybe this summer, if we're lucky, we can talk them all into it. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed!"

"So, how was school today? That Amy girl still giving you trouble?" Amy had been purposely doing things to mess me up at practice the past few days trying to make me look bad in front of Mrs. J. Luckily Mrs. J wasn't so easily fooled and called Amy on it, but it was still annoying and unnerving. Five more weeks to go and if she was going to keep this crap up it was going to be a long five weeks.

"Eh, she was okay today. I think she knows she got busted last time and doesn't want kicked out of the whole thing. All I know is that if she keeps holding on to this grudge, the next five weeks are going to suck big time."

"How about the big date? Everything still all set?"

"Yeah, we're pretty much sticking with the same game plan as last weekend. I hope it all goes smoothly."

"I'm sure it will and if he tries to get too hands on I hear you're perfectly capable of kicking the crap out of him, so we won't have to worry about that at least!" He said laughing.

"Now who could have ever told you about that? Let me guess you ended up talking to Emmett recently."

"How'd you guess?" he responded still chuckling.

I just sighed not really knowing how to respond. "I don't really think that will be our problem." I finally responded sarcastically.

He got really quiet. "What exactly do you mean by that?"

"Well, it's just that he's never really tried ANYTHING besides holding my hand and kissing my cheek. He's been alone with me in the car every night for a week and has never made any moves." I sighed as I felt my cheeks turning pink over the embarrassment of the things that were pouring out of my mouth, but Seth had become my best friend and I just really needed to talk. "I mean, a part of me is glad he hasn't. I'm really nervous about the whole kissing thing since I've never done it before or anything, but then again it concerns me that he hasn't even tried…like maybe something's wrong…like maybe he doesn't WANT to kiss me."

Seth was very quiet on the other end of the line. I started feeling bad for babbling on at him so much about all of this teen drama when he sighed and started in, "Well to be honest I'm glad he's not pushing too fast. He seems like a good guy. I seriously doubt that it is that he doesn't want to kiss you, but rather he's looking for the right time. Don't worry things will work out fine and you don't want him to just plant one on you on a regular boring night. It'll be better if it's really special…especially when it's your very first time."

I laughed lightly, suddenly embarrassed to be getting kissing advice from a guy friend. "Thanks Seth, you're right. And I'm sorry for laying all of this on you, it's just well, you're my best friend now and sometimes you just need to be able to talk about stuff that's driving you nuts with someone other than family members who would probably rather you stay locked in a glass box until you're thirty anyway."

I heard Emmett cracking up from the room down the hall that he shared with Rosalie. "Well, I guess Emmett agrees with me anyway, he's busting a gut."

Seth was already laughing too and at the news of Emmett he laughed even harder. "It's okay Lina, it's only fair. I tortured you with stories of LA all week, the least I can do is listen to your worries about dating."

"Oh, well LA wasn't torture at all, but thanks. I appreciate it."

"Well, I need to get off here and get to work I guess. Now that I have all of this material to work with, I need to get going on actually putting this thing together. Wish me luck!"

"Good Luck! Night Seth!"

"Night Lina."

As soon as my conversation with Seth was complete. Alice and Rose came sweeping into my room with an armload of new outfits to choose from for my date the next night. Alice, having seen it would be a nice warm night, had picked out all short sleeve shirts for the occasion. I tried on several outfits but today I found in the pile a totally "me" ensemble. I smiled in the mirror as I admired the tastefully simple yet elegant way that the silky black blouse draped my frame. It would have been a tank top if it hadn't been for the lightweight material that created a small sleeve on either shoulder making the top look a bit dressier. This was matched with black jeans that had been faded to a semi dark charcoal color and a pair of sturdy black leather boots with a relatively low thick squared heel. To finish the effect my sisters slid a necklace that held a large silver heart around my neck that worked perfectly to bring just the right touch of class to the otherwise slightly plain outfit.

"This is it! It's perfect! I love it!" I beamed from my place in front of the mirror.

Alice and Rose beamed at me, proud of themselves for finally making me happy while maintaining their idea of styling standards. I made them take a couple of pictures with my cell phone before they left me to get ready for bed. I laid out my outfit carefully to keep it from wrinkling overnight, changed into my jammies, and slid into bed. I picked up my phone and looked at the picture and then put it back down on my bedside table, rolling over to turn myself into a Lina burrito with my comforter.

I laid there for a second and then rolled back over, opened my phone and brought the picture up sending it to Seth with a short note.

_Alice and Rose got hold of me. This is my outfit for tomorrow. I actually like it for once. What do you think?_

I put my phone back down and rolled back over to my original position. A few minutes later I heard my text alert ringing on my phone. I picked it up to see that Seth had responded.

_You look wonderful! How could you ever think he would NOT want to?_

I smiled and wrote back. _Thanks, I needed to hear that._ I was suddenly feeling much better about my date the next day.


	27. Chapter 27

**27. A Night of Firsts…**

I woke up completely excited for date night. I spent extra time in the shower taking the extra steps to use the buffing creams and body masks that my sisters spent oodles of money on that I rarely ever used. I did the same with my face and hair as I meticulously prepared myself for the day ahead of me. For once I was almost enjoying the process, of course the fact that I was able to finally use both hands again didn't hurt my appreciation either.

When I was all done I dressed in something more comfortable to wear during the day until it was time to get ready for the evening and went downstairs to have some breakfast and visit with my family. I actually missed them. I hadn't seen very much of them during the past week between school and rehearsals for the play.

I walked into the kitchen to find my mother looking over plans for yet another remodel of the house. This time she was looking at re-doing the kitchen. I didn't see the need, it was perfectly adequate to provide for the two and half humans who actually utilized it.

"Good morning Lina!" my mother greeted me cheerfully. "Don't you look nice today."

"Thanks. I decided to go ahead and get ready this morning and just change my clothes and touch up before I leave tonight."

"Yes, that's a very good idea. I heard the girls say that they actually picked out an outfit that you adored! They were very proud of themselves."

"As they should be…it's perfect. They did good!"

I threw a couple of pieces of bread in the toaster and gathered the goodies for my specialty cream cheese sandwiches. On very special occasions I would warm toast and then smother it in cream cheese and strawberry preserves and let them all melt together on the warm toast. It was delicious treat that kind of resembled a cheese danish. I picked up my freshly created treat and made my way in to the dining room to eat in the company of my father, Alice, Edward, and Bella.

Alice and Edward were in an all out poker challenge. From their conversation I gathered that they had been at it all night long in total gridlock. I never did understand why they ever tried to play strategy games with one another. It was always a total calamity. Bella smiled as I sat down next to her and looked over her shoulder at what she was working on. She had decided to attend college again this year and was buried up to her elbows in research for her first big term paper. This time around she chose to major in Psychology, which became the newest family inside joke. We were such a strange mishmash of such entirely different personalities; it was a miracle that we really did manage to coexist peacefully. I sat there quietly enjoying my sandwich and simply being in the company of those I loved.

My father engaged me in polite conversation asking how school and rehearsals were going and if Connor was taking good care of me. He seemed to really like Connor, as did the rest of the family from what I could gather. It was always a relief when someone got a green light, especially from the more gifted family members who could see beyond the face someone put forth to the real person inside. To spite the fact that everyone seemed to like him, I got the distinct impression that there was something Edward wasn't telling me, but I decided that if it were truly important he would share and if not then I probably didn't need to know. Connor deserved his privacy as much as anybody else.

Time seemed to creep by as I attempted to find things to occupy my day before it was time to leave on my date. I went back up to my room after breakfast and concentrated on finishing my homework so I wouldn't have to deal with it later in the weekend and learning more of my lines. Thankfully the lines were easy. I had watched the movie so many times that I had a lot of the lines memorized and the play version had very slight variations that were easy enough to convert my prior knowledge to.

About an hour before I was expecting Connor to pick me up I got a text from Seth wishing me luck. We texted back and forth a few times about how his website was coming along and my nerves about the night to come. After we finished I touched back up my makeup and hair and changed into my date outfit.

Our house was on the way out of town so the whole gang came by to pick me up. It was the first time anyone besides Connor had met the rest of my family or seen our home. They all came in and we made introductions all around. Leighton and the twins seemed quite a bit more ill at ease with my family than Connor had. Malia, having made friends with Rose and Alice during her pre-audition makeover seemed nearly as at ease as me. I took them on a quick tour of the house, which Connor hadn't even gotten himself yet to spite having actually spent a whole evening here with me.

Once the tour was over we were on our way. Lucas and Riley had borrowed their mother's minivan so we could all ride together. Connor and I were in the back, Riley and Malia in the middle and Lucas drove with Leighton riding in the passenger seat. The hour ride alone was a total blast. We were laughing so hard a few times that my eyes started to water and Malia almost peed her pants over Riley's Adam Sandler impressions.

Our first stop on our date night was at an upscale open air shopping mall. The boys wanted to stop in at a sporting goods store while we girls had our eyes set on a bookstore and an ultra chic accessory store that happened to be on the other end of the shopping mall. The boys dropped us off at our end of the mall and then drove around to the sporting goods side. The boys had ambitions to climb the indoor climbing wall when their shopping was done, so we decided that we would walk across the mall to meet them when we were done. It was quite a bit chillier than Alice had led me to believe that it would be, so Connor loaned me his letterman's jacket. It didn't take me long to work out that this had been Alice's plan all along. The littlest puppet master strikes again.

Malia, Leighton, and I had a blast shopping together. We took our time meandering through the countless rows of books and then made our way to the accessory shop. I typically didn't even bother shopping at places like this because Alice and Rose had me stocked with more needless accessories than I could use in a lifetime, but this trip I found a few things I actually liked. I picked up a really beautiful necklace and matching earrings for Nessie as a late birthday present and at the bookstore I had found a collection of Shakespearean plays in a really nice leather binding for Bella's birthday. At her insistence, we no longer celebrated Bella's birthdays, but since I was her biological sister I always felt like I wanted to get her something anyway. I was a few days late again though thanks to my broken hand and busy schedule.

With our purchases proudly in hand we made our way across the long mall. We were about a quarter of our way across the mall when we heard some yelling from behind us. We turned in reaction to the sound to find a group of four boys were the source of the noise.

"Hey ladies, aren't you a little out of your territory?" sneered a boy wearing a blue and white jacket with a large football on the right arm.

We turned back around picking up our pace as Leighton explained that they were from Springfield. They were our town's biggest football rivals and it wasn't unusual for the teams to harass one another. The lead boy was their star quarterback and the other three were a few of their linemen.

"Where you going girls? Come here, we want to talk to you." Their voices called from even closer behind us. The smell of alcohol met me as I turned to face them.

"Listen guys, I suggest you back off. We're just shopping and we don't want any trouble." I said as I handed Leighton my bags and purse just in case I needed my hands free.

"Oooh, she doesn't want any trouble. I guess we better let the prissy pirates get back to their shopping." One of the boys from the back of the group slurred. He was larger and reminded me a little of Emmett. The other boys laughed as the head boy cocked his head and continued.

"And what exactly is a little thing like you going to do about it?" he said with a smirk stepping a little closer. He was still just out of my reach, but just barely.

Leighton and Malia tensed up looking around for help, but I wasn't backing down. I happened to think of my family who were supposed to be in the area in case of emergency and sent out a mental message to Edward just in case they were to give me a chance to take care of this, but be nearby just in case I wasn't able to deal.

"Trust me; you want to walk away right now. Go get some coffee and find somewhere to sleep it off."

"I don't think I want to do that princess, and I don't think there's a thing you can do about it." He sneered as he reached up to touch my hair that was resting on my left shoulder. That was the wrong move.

Before he ever knew what happened I had reacted grabbing his arm that had made the massive mistake of touching me and spinning in to him flipping him over my shoulder in a body drop after which I kept his momentum going leaving him on his stomach with his right arm still twisted in my grasp with my boot firmly embedded in his shoulder blade. I twisted his wrist forcefully making him yelp in pain and then I turned to look at his buddies who were all staring in disbelief.

"I warned you! Now, if you want to keep this going, I'll be more than happy to oblige, but not before I break the throwing arm of your star quarterback here." I said with all the forcefulness I could muster putting a little more pressure on his palm for emphasis.

They took a step back with their hands up as I bent down to talk to my harasser. "I would highly suggest that you learn how to treat a lady. Next time the cops will be involved. You read me?" I spat twisting his wrist slightly again as one last reminder.

"Okay, Okay," he yelped jumping up as I released him.

He rushed to join his friends and I watched them as they stumbled away in the opposite direction. I turned to look at my friends who were staring at me with nearly the same expression that the drunken boys had a few minutes before.

"What the heck was that?" Malia yelped when she managed to find her voice again.

"That was freakin' awesome!" Leighton yelled out at the same time as a wide smile spread across her face.

Behind them I saw a face peek from around a corner and realized that my siblings were nearby just as I had suspected. I could hear the faint sound of male laughter that I was pretty sure originated from my brothers and a light giggle that was most likely Alice.

"Well, let's just put it this way, I have one sister that was almost attacked and was luckily saved by one of my brothers and another sister that wasn't as lucky. That being the case, my big brothers made it a priority that I wouldn't have a similar story. They've been teaching me Judo."

"Wow!" They both said looking over their shoulders to make sure that we weren't being followed again.

"But how did you know that you could take him out? Have you ever had to use it before?" Malia asked still nervous about what had just happened.

"I've never used it in a real life situation, but you've seen my brother Emmett right?" they both nodded, "He and my brother Jasper are my sparring partners. I knew if I could take down Emmett that I could take that jerk down no problem."

"Bbbut what if they all attacked at once?"

"I've only dealt with two at a time before, but unless they also had martial arts training, I probably would have been able to at least hold my own until security showed up…especially with them being soused."

They kept asking questions as we made our way over to the sporting goods store and found our dates at the climbing wall. The girls immediately started recounting the incident for them in a lot more detail than I could have done myself as the guys stood there staring at me with wide eyes, a look that was between amazement and respect growing in their gazes. Meanwhile, all I could do was blush. It's not like I did it to show off or anything. Everything my brothers had taught me were reactionary and for self defense purposes only.

I was more than a little grateful when it was time to move on to the movie portion of the evening. The boys sacrificially allowed us girls to choose the movie. We stood out front debating on making them see the sweet romantic love story or if we would be kind and go with the romantic comedy. Leighton suggested that we go with the horror movie remake so the boys could protect us from the scary parts. The boys liked this idea more than the others, but still managed to sneak in the hint that the war parody movie was what they were really hoping for. In the end we compromised on the romantic comedy that just so happened to star one of their favorite action heroes and promised some high speed chase scenes to level out the romantic banter and purchased our tickets.

We got some munchies and found our seats. The twins sat next to each other with the girls on either side of them and Connor and I decided to take the seats right behind them so that we could lean forward and talk to them before the movie started. This was fine before the movie started, but once the show was going we started to realize our mistake. We tried to ignore the make-out sessions going on in front of us during the movie, but it was more than a little difficult making us both very uncomfortable…Connor was especially uncomfortable. Finally I whispered the suggestion into Connor's ear that maybe we should move to different seats. We watched the rest of the movie from our safe new location four rows below our friends. It was actually a really great movie, and Connor and I laughed so hard a few times that my chest hurt. Connor remained the gentleman holding my hand and offering me his popcorn on a regular basis. The two happily distracted couples didn't even realize we had moved until the ending credits started rolling and the theater patrons began to get up to leave. They of course teased us for being sticks in the mud, but to be honest I was glad that Connor hadn't tried to make a move on me in a crowded theater. It was just way too cliché for my first kiss.

Our next stop was the pizza shop in the tiny amusement park that sat on the south side of town. We shared a couple of pizzas as Connor and I were relentlessly teased for our conservativeness at the movies.

"After what she did to those Springfield kids back at the mall, I was afraid I'd get my butt kicked!" he joked back winking at me as he tried to take some of the heat off of us. I gave him a light punch in the arm at which point he pretended I had knocked him out of the booth. Everyone laughed then and the conversation moved on. I noticed that Leighton and Connor had their own special brand of humor and shared a lot of inside jokes that were lost on the rest of us. I found out later that they have known each other since they were really little and are pretty much best friends.

As soon as we were done we took off for the park area. We started off at the batting cages where the boys made fun of our girly hits, giving me a particularly hard time since I was now supposed to be a "badass." I used my recently broken hand as an excuse. It actually was a little sore from my altercation with the drunken quarterback.

After the cages we made our way over to the bumper boats. The boys relentlessly harassed us here as well. At one point all three boys had me trapped and rammed me all the way back into a corner. I wasn't so great at the whole retaliation thing so finally they got bored and went off to inflict annoyance on the other two girls. Connor was particularly fond of harassing Leighton. He managed to corner her three different times before our time was up.

I made up for my humiliation at the cages and bumper boats on the go cart track though. I left them all in the dust finding the optimal groove immediately. After that the boys refused to allow me back on the go cart tracks again that night to spite my frequent request for a rematch. I liked actually having something that I was good at for once.

Our final activity of the night was miniature golf. Leighton and Malia were very pleased to finally find an activity that they dominated, putting the rest of us to shame. I was the worst of all, constantly over calculating my swings, one time managing to actually knock my ball up against the far fencing and into the decorative pond. The boys really had a gut busting laugh at that one. I finally decided that I had found my niche in life, be it with vampires or humans, I was obviously meant to be the comic relief.

The drive home went even more quickly than going to the city, and I was very disappointed to see the night end. Lucas in a failed attempt at subtlety parked around the side of the house so that the car was not in sight of the front door, so Connor could walk me to the front door without an audience. Of course they had no way of knowing that there was no such thing as actual privacy so close to this house. Connor held my hand as we approached the front door.

When we reached the front porch he turned toward me taking my other hand in his and smiled a big warm smile at me.

"I had a lot of fun tonight. Thanks for coming with me."

I smiled back brightly. "Thanks for inviting me. I don't remember the last time I had so much fun. It was awesome!"

He reached up with his right hand and tucked the strand of hair that had blown across my face back behind my ear. My breath caught in my chest as his hand lingered there and then he very slowly and gently leaned forward as he cupped my right cheek in his hand and gently caressed my lips with his own. My heart stopped for a second and then began to pound with excitement as he pulled away slightly to look at me.

"Thank you." I said before I realized that I was saying it out loud.

"Thank you?" he smiled down at me.

I blushed as I looked back up at those sapphire eyes that were twinkling down at me and then quietly admitted, "Well, that was sort of my first kiss." Wincing as the word 'kiss' escaped my lips.

He smiled a little wider pulling me slightly closer, "In that case, it's my pleasure." He whispered and then reached down again kissing me a little bit longer and with the slightest bit more pressure. I thought my knees were going to buckle out from underneath me and my world began to swirl around me as I instinctually reached my arms around is neck and ran my fingers through his hair. He pulled back again smiling slightly smugly and gave me a gentle squeeze.

"So, how do you feel about dances?" he asked with a half smile as he looked down into my now wide eyes.

"Well, I've never actually been to one, so I wouldn't know."

"Would you like to go to one and find out? The homecoming dance is coming up in a couple of weeks…wanna go with me?"

A thrill ran up my spine and I was no longer able to restrain the light squeal that was bubbling up inside me. I kept it very light and followed it by a quick "Yes!"

He laughed a little, "Great!" He gave me another squeeze and a kiss on the forehead before letting go of me and turning to open the screen door for me. I walked in still dazed from my first romantic kiss and waved as he walked off the porch and around the side of the house to our waiting friends.

I finally woke up a little to realize that my family members were all seated in the living room in front of the television all smiling up at me knowingly. I smiled at them dazedly and walked up to my room with a smile that I couldn't quite shake. As I was walking up the stairs I heard Alice yell up after me "We'll talk about your dress later!" I laughed lightly quickening my pace to get to my room. I laid down on my bed and sighed mentally replaying the events of the night and then reached over to grab my diary which was starting to get a lot more use again and rolled to my stomach to document the night's event while they were fresh on my mind.

I was just finishing up my entry when my nightly correspondence with Seth began.

_How was the date? I heard the part about your beating up some annoying jocks at the mall…LOL._

I rolled my eyes. "Emmett…you just had to call and tell Seth right away about the stupid jocks didn't you?" I grumbled lowly. I had no trouble hearing the rolling laughter coming from all the members of my family seated below me in the living room.

_**It went really well actually. We had a lot of fun. I caught a lot of heck the rest of the night about being a 'badass' that can't hit a baseball or put up a decent bumper boat fight. Did leave 'em in the dust on the go cart track though 8o) Oh, and I now have a date for the Homecoming Dance.**_

_LOL…glad you had fun. So I'm going to go out a limb and guess that your fears about the guy were unfounded?_

_**Should I assume that my loudmouth siblings shared more than just my self defense maneuvers?**_

_Ask me no questions I'll tell you no lies…_

_**Chicken! LOL…I guess after whining to you I owe you an honest answer. Yes he did and it was a very wonderful memory. No matter what happens from here, at least that was good. **_

_You expecting trouble?_

_**Please Seth…It's me we're talking about. Nothing ever seems to really come easy. LOL **_

_You know if you go looking for trouble you'll be sure to find it._

_**Okay Plato, I think it's time I hit the sack. Been a big day.**_

_K. Night Sandy. Sweet dreams._

I closed my phone and thought about what Seth said. I can't help but worry when the dream that I seem to currently be living in will come to a screeching halt. My life never goes as smoothly as my school and relationship experiences have so far. I just find I keep wondering when the rug is going to come flying out from under me.


	28. Chapter 28

_Author's note: Okay, I'm just not happy with my descriptions of the dresses in this next chapter, so I'm going to post links to the dresses on my profile page so you can see them for yourselves and get a better mental picture. The models don't really fit my mental picture of the girls though…except for maybe the one wearing Malia's dress. _

_Anyway, enjoy and thank you for all of your reviews. And Emi Zuniga…your email address wasn't there so I can't let you know if I update. Sorry…but if you sign up you can tell fanfiction to email you alerts when I update. Thanks everyone for your continued interest._

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**28. Hijacked by Fashion**_

I woke up contemplating how wonderful things had been the night before. I found it interesting as I sat thinking how much better the date was than it would most likely have been if it had happened last weekend as originally planned. Connor and I had the opportunity to have two more intimate dates where we had the chance to talk and get to know each other more and a whole week of regular routine before the big night that made us comfortable with one another. If we hadn't already had the familiarity, then the whole night probably would have been much more awkward and probably would not have ended with such a wonderful and amazing first kiss and a dance invitation. I never would have dreamed a week ago that I would be sitting here a week later grateful for that stupid broken hand, but here I was. It's funny how things seem to work out for the best in the end somehow.

It wasn't too very long after I woke up that I got my first text message from Leighton.

_OMG! Connor told us about asking you to homecoming. We MUST go dress shopping ASAP!_

I sighed thinking of the battle I will face with Alice if I take away her dress shopping fun.

_**Alice informed me last night that she was taking me dress shopping. It's sort of her passion, so I agreed, but if you and Malia wanted to come along, I'm sure she's be thrilled to have two more subjects to dress as well! Warning: She's a fashion Nazi!**_

_LOL! Sounds awesome. Let us know when and where and we'll be there._

A few seconds later Alice dashed through my doorway so quickly that she appeared to materialize out of thin air.

"Thank you for letting me take all three of you shopping! Arrange for them to go with us today! We'll find everything we need at Nordstroms and there's a big sale, so Malia is actually going to find a dress that she loves and can afford."

_**Alice wants to go today. You guys up for it? She says there's a big sale at Nordstroms.**_

_Sweet…let me check, but I'm pretty sure we can both go. I'll get back to you in a few._

Three hours later we were up to our elbows in dresses at the sales racks. The three of us were walking in and out of the dressing room stalls in an endless parade of dresses Alice picked out for us. I had to admit that she was the master of finding the right shape to suit each one of our body types.

Leighton was tall and slender with no real curves to speak of. By the end of the trip we had narrowed her down to two perfect dresses. One was a beautiful blue silk slip dress with a black chiffon overlay encrusted with crystals and the other was an adorable dark pink colored halter dress made of a chiffon type material that had a tiered effect. Since the price difference was about one hundred dollars, she ended up choosing the dark pink. Alice helped her accessorize with a carefully chosen hair comb encrusted with like colored jewels and a matching ankle bracelet.

Malia was extremely petite with some gentle curves. She was a little harder to shop for because everything looked so lovely on her. We finally narrowed her down to gorgeous magenta jersey number that had a crystal encrusted empire waist with a wrap style bodice that twisted up into a single shoulder strap and an adorable little spaghetti strap dress with pin dots and a pink stripe accenting the bottom hem and as a backing on a small belt that went around the waistline. The purple was definitely the fancier of the two dresses, but it was really stretching her dance budget, so she went with the pin dot because it was on an amazing sale at only thirty dollars. She was so excited to get such a great deal because now she could afford to go all out on accessories.

I was the difficult one to find something we were all happy with. Everything they tried to talk me into made me feel way too exposed. It was one thing to feel exposed for a few minutes as I auditioned for a play, but something entirely different for me to feel that way for an entire night at a dance. As girls who didn't have the problem of being excessively curvy, they just didn't understand my aversion to really low necklines. Finally they brought me a few more conservative dresses that I didn't fear I was going to pop out of and ended up narrowing it down between two dresses that were extremely similar. One had more of an iridescent lavender taffeta base with a ruched empire waistline with a bow at the bottom left hand side of the waistline and a halter type bodice that was covered in sheer black lace with light beadwork, while the other was identical except instead of the halter neckline it had a basic V-neck with cap sleeves also covered in the black lace and was an iridescent blue. I finally chose to go with the halter because I preferred the color and the girls insisted I had to be at least a little sexy. Alice insisted that I would borrow her heart necklace again to go with it for the big night.

Finally fully satisfied with our purchases we made our way back home. The reality of the coming dance was starting to set in now that I had my dress in hand. Once we were finally back home Alice insisted that I put on my dress and model it for Rose, Bella and Mom. I refused to go down and let the guys see me though. I was embarrassing enough doing it for the ladies. They oohed and aahed over me agreeing that we found the perfect balance of class and modesty. Alice brought in her necklace and pulled my hair back in an impromptu up do and forced me to put on a pair of black satin stilettos. I stared at my reflection pleased at the final product. The only thing I was not sure of was the heels, but if my feet hurt too badly I could always go barefoot.

"Don't you dare!" Alice called out less than a second after the thought had crossed my mind. She stood on her tiptoes doing her best to get high enough to look me in the eyes, but still falling way short. We locked glares for a few seconds before she finally shook her head, "Okay fine, I'll see if I can find something a little less painful as long as you promise not to go barefoot!"

Bella and Mom laughed as she dashed off in an attempt to find a more comfortable alternative. She came back with a slightly wider and shorter heeled shoe that I could tell immediately would be a little easier on my feet. Once that was all settled and made our way back downstairs to visit with the rest of the family.

Jake and Nessie were back and they both ran up to me and gave me a big hug.

"How come you always save the best excitement for when we're not around?" Jake joked. "Of course you pick the weekend that we couldn't come along to actually use all that stuff Emmett and Jasper's been teaching you on an actual human."

I shrugged with a half smile, "Guess you can't let me go anywhere huh Jake?"

"Guess not," he said putting his hands up as if to block. Taking my cue from him I threw a couple of light jabs his way as he ducked and shuffled around me like a boxer. We laughed as I finally managed to land one, only resulting in making my hand sting having forgotten my recent injury would be tender. I yelped and shook it reflexively as the rest of the spectators laughed and my father growled under his breath.

"You need to be careful with that Lina. You don't want to re-injure it."

I winced, "Sorry Dad."

"Yeah _DAD_ she'll be sure to keep it to knocking drunken football players off their feet from now on." Emmett teased from behind me. I rolled my eyes and I heard my father sigh as he left the room. "That reminds me," Emmett continued, "We need to get sparring again. You looked a little rusty and it took you about half a second longer than it should have to react. You're getting weak little girl." He smirked ruffling my hair.

I spun out from under his hand smacking it with my left hand as I went. "I was still plenty sharp to deal with that guy. Actually now that you bring it up, I was thinking that I probably won't be sparring with you guys for a while. Besides the fact that the play is going to be taking up most of my free time, I was thinking I might grow out my nails for the dance and stuff."

Emmett opened his mouth to start making fun of me, but didn't get a chance because Rose and Alice were in front of me squealing in girlish delight. "Really? You're really going to grow out your nails?" Rose started.

"Let's go condition your cuticle bed and prep your cuticles now. You know if you take proper care of the cuticles then your nails will grow much more quickly and will be much stronger." Alice rambled dragging me up the stairs as she spoke, Rose following closely behind.

_Like Rose said, "beauty is pain." _I thought to myself as I tried my best to completely ignore Alice's ramble. _Guess if I'm serious about looking the part for the dance and the play then this is the pain part…_

I spent the next hour with my hands splayed out in front of me as Alice and Rose each worked on one, babbling the entire time. I sat there and thought about how much I'd rather be talking to Connor or Seth than enduring this trial of my patience. Almost as if he could hear me begging for his call, my phone began to ring the tune that I had saved as Seth's personal ring tone.

"Okay ladies, that's plenty for today. I really need to get this." I said trying to pull my hand out of Rose's grasp in order to reach for the phone. She held it for a few seconds and then reluctantly let go to allow me to answer.

"Hello there my favorite rescuer."

"So what exactly did I save you from?"

Alice and Rose rolled their eyes as they left the room to allow me to talk in relative privacy.

"I mentioned that I thought I might grow my nails out for the dance and the play and before I knew what hit me Alice and Rose hijacked me for an hour long manicure. I swear my fingers have been buffed down to nubs!"

Seth laughed, "Well, I'm glad to be of service ma'am."

"Thanks…more than you ever know, thanks! It's not like Alice hadn't already gotten to dress me up all day anyway. She took my friends and I dress shopping. I didn't think I was ever going to find something that I felt comfortable in. I finally got lucky. Anyway, enough about my day…what's up with you? The site coming along?"

"Yeah, I'm really surprised how easily it is all working out. I guess I need to run ideas past you more often…I think you're my muse." Even though he wasn't allowed to tell me much, he did discuss ideas for how he wanted the web menus to flow and the effects he wanted to throw in and I threw out a few suggestions of my own, although I had no clue how to make them work that way in reality. He had liked them though and said he thought he could probably make them work if he gave them a shot.

"Muse? I don't know about that Clearwater. You're the genius, I just told you what I thought would look cool."

"Well what do you think a muse is anyway? A muse inspires the creator, and you did…so a muse you are!"

I laughed a little embarrassed as I pictured myself wearing a toga and holding a harp on Mt. Olympus. I shook my head trying to force the ridiculous image out of my head as I continued. "So how long before I finally get to see this masterpiece anyway?"

"It's scheduled for public release at the end of November, but I'm allowed to run it past an editorial staff in early November. So guess what…You're hired!"

"Nice, what's the pay boss?"

"Ummm…getting to see my work early?"

"Wow, that's the most I've ever earned. I'm so proud of myself!" I said giggling. "Seriously though, I can't wait!"

"I'm excited for you to see it. I think you'll be impressed."

"I'm sure I will." My stomach decided to start grumbling as soon as I finished the sentence.

"Sounds like I need to let you go eat some supper."

"Yeah, I was planning on grabbing something when my manicurists abducted me. I probably should get back downstairs and see what I can rustle up."

"Okay, well I guess I'll catch you later."

"Alrighty Seth. Thanks again for the rescue."

"Anytime."

I jogged out of my room and down the stairs to kitchen still cheerful from my phone call from Seth. Jake had it right when he referred to him as a "happy little punk". Seth was always in a good mood and it seemed to be contagious. It took a very bad day to keep me from cheering up during a conversation with him.

I walked into the kitchen to see Alice and Rose holding a plate of warm leftover spaghetti and a salad. It was their attempt to apologize for keeping me from eating sooner. They sat with me in the dining room as I ate and were gracious enough to broaden the topics of conversation beyond fashion for once. They asked me all about my date with Connor. Alice had seen it all unfold, but she told me that she likes to hear it from my perspective since she's just a third party observer and doesn't get to hear what's going on inside people's heads in her visions.

During supper I got a text message from Connor asking how dress shopping had gone. I told him that it would take too long to text and asked if he was able to talk. He called back right away and I he laughed as I told him all about the fashion related dramas that had dominated my day. We talked for a good hour before we finally decided it was getting late and we needed to be getting some sleep.

I was really looking forward to being able to drive myself to school the next morning, but admitted to myself that I was really going to miss hitching rides home with Connor. It would have been nice to have more opportunities to learn a little more about kissing.


	29. Chapter 29

**29. Involuntary Reactions**

I didn't get too many more chances to dwell on the coming dance as the next two weeks flew past me in a blur of school, rehearsals, and a weekend of totally intense choreography boot camp. In the midst of the chaos Connor and I managed to grab a few scant moments for ourselves, a stolen kiss in an empty classroom between classes or backstage during a break in rehearsals, lunch together at McDonalds during the brief break during boot camp, an evening drive after boot camp ended Sunday afternoon that concluded with another sunset cuddle session at our favorite valley. We didn't get many chances to practice our kissing, but we made good use of the time we did get.

Before I knew it we were leaving rehearsal the night before the dance. Connor walked me to my car with his arm around my shoulders just like he did every night taking a few minutes to kiss me goodbye before opening my door so I can slide in the driver's seat to drive myself home. Our plan for the next night was already in place…he was going to drive out and pick me up at our house and then we would meet the twins and their ladies out it the parking lot to walk in together. I rolled down the car window after getting in my car, just like I did every night, and he leaned in to give me one last kiss.

"I can't wait to see you in that dress tomorrow night." He said with a light peck.

"I just hope you're not disappointed." I said pulling my brows together with worry.

He reached up and gently rubbed his fingers where my brows furrowed, "Now why would you ever think that. That's impossible," he said with a big warm smile as he reached back through one more time to kiss me a little more passionately letting his tongue gently caress my lower lip. I shivered as I reached my hand behind his head pulling him a little further through the window. He chuckled lightly pulling away as he whispered, "Hold that thought for tomorrow night," as he placed a long finger over my lips. He leaned through to gently kiss my cheek and then backed away putting his hands in his back pockets.

I sat there for a second trying to remember how to put the car into reverse. It never ceased to surprise me at how a kiss from him could totally cloud my memory so that even the simplest of tasks seemed difficult. Finally remembering how to clutch, I placed the car in reverse and backed out of my space and then clutched again as I put the car in first and eased off the clutch and onto the gas. I must have still been a little dazed because I dumped the clutch a little making my classic car shudder slightly as I took off. Thankfully I was able to transition into the second through fifth gears more fluidly and managed to make it back home in good time.

I spent a few minutes with my family as I ate supper like I tried to do every night and then went up to my room to get cleaned up for the night and call Seth before bed. Somehow to spite the busy schedule we still managed to talk for a little bit most every night. The busyness forced us to miss a few nights, but for some reason I felt like my day was somehow incomplete without recapping with Seth. He admitted to feeling the same way, like it needed to be the final act that smoothed the transition to sleep. To not have that closer was sort of like a day ending without a sunset.

"So, ready for the big dance?"

"Yes and no, but mainly yes…I'm just really nervous. I've never done the whole couple-dancing thing. I'm afraid I'm going to suck."

"Please, it's not like it's a ballroom competition. It's a high school dance. It's not that complicated. Basically you rock back and forth while you hug."

I laughed as I realized he was right. "Oh I don't know…I'm pretty good and messing up the easy stuff."

"You'll be fine. Don't worry so much. I'd be more worried about Connor's reaction when you guys get into the music discussion. I still can't believe you're so in love with 90's alternative rock!"

"Oh would you shut up. I can't help what I'm drawn to. Blame Edward if you have to blame anybody. He's the one who let me have free access to his music collection. I probably never would have happened across it if it weren't for his own personal liking for it."

"Yeah, how does that work anyway? It was my understanding that Edward hoarded his music like a pirate hoards treasure."

"Well, let's just put it this way, Bella and I are the only two who have been allowed to peruse the musical inner sanctum whenever we wish. I was told it was something to do with showing the proper respect and admiration. Anyway, what are you giving me heck for? Aren't you the one who has become addicted to a certain American Idol runner up's crooning?"

"Hey, at least the kid could sing. Half of those bands you love do more yelling than singing."

"They do not!" I said defensively.

"Well, anyway, when the music talk finally rears it's ugly head you better be prepared to defend your choices because you're sure to catch some heck that's for sure."

"Oh, and how do you know he won't like it too?"

"Because he's not 40."

"Oh stop it! Can we please talk about something else? Oh…I almost forgot. How was your date with Linda?" I was a little apprehensive to hear the details. When he told me he had a date I was more than just a little uncomfortable with the idea of sharing my Seth. I had a feeling that a girlfriend wouldn't be so fond of sharing her guy with another girl every night, even if she was only a 16-year-old family friend who lived 3,000 miles away. Connor didn't have a problem with it, but then again, he thought of Seth as a 30 year old family friend and probably never really realized how good of a friendship we really actually have. Anyway, as many times as he'd listened to me agonize over my fears about Connor, the least I could do was ask about his date,

"Eh, it was weird. She was just so into herself and all of the things that she liked and she was doing at work and stuff. I don't know, we just didn't click. All night long I was just really wishing I had just stayed home."

I felt myself sigh inwardly with relief and then immediately felt guilty that I was relieved that he was still alone. "Oh, I'm sorry it didn't go better Seth. Someday you'll meet her…that girl that's going to be right for you…and then it won't be weird. I wish you had a better time, but if she's as self absorbed as you say then I'm glad it wasn't with her. I don't want to have to share my best friend with a Rosalie impersonator."

We both laughed at that and then realizing the time we said our goodbyes and I tucked myself into bed daydreaming about my first dance tomorrow night. My daydreams of swaying in Connor's arms kept being interrupted by Seth's face. I still couldn't help but feel guilty over my involuntary reaction to his bad date. Here I was happily coupled up with a gorgeous and sweet guy and I was begrudging the same happiness for my best friend.

I lay there for the next hour my mind skipping back and forth between Connor and Seth. It's strange how your mind can be so full of two different people at the same time. My relationship with these two wonderful guys was so different and yet so similar that sometimes the lines blurred slightly between them. They were both so easy to talk to for one thing. I was a little bit closer to Seth though in this way but mainly because he already knew all of my family's secrets, so I didn't have to hide parts of my life from him as I did Connor. Romance wise I was of course closer to Connor, we were holding hands, hugging, kissing, and about to go to a dance together and he was really my actual age. While Seth still looked like a really mature teenager or maybe someone in his very early twenties, in reality he was 30, which was a fact that was never totally lost on me.

To spite all of this, there were times, like when Seth told me about his date, that my gut reactions betrayed what my will power refused to admit. To spite the fact that I constantly reminded myself that Seth was my best friend who lives very, very far away, there was still something in those reactions that undeniably revealed that there was more affection than merely friendship there. Of course I would continue to bury those feelings, I mean, I had a boyfriend of sorts now and I felt guilty even reacting unconsciously this way to another guy while I was trying to explore a relationship with a guy that was right there in front of me. Not only that, but even if there were no Connor, even if there weren't a whole country separating us, there's nothing that said that Seth would ever feel the same way about me. I was just the kid that he humored and took the time to cheer up when I was down…although, he did call me his muse.

_Enough! _I finally told myself, _just stop it and refocus on your big date tomorrow, your very first dance!_

I managed to focus on the dance for a while, but before I finally fell into unconsciousness Seth's smiling face popped back in my mind again. Jeesh he was relentless…even in my subconscious!


	30. Chapter 30

**30. The Dance**

I was a nervous wreck from the moment I woke up. I paced and fidgeted my way around the whole house all morning driving my family members bonkers. After the fifth time I had paced between the dining room and family room Emmett finally spoke up…

"Come on kid, give us a break! Why don't you just call Seth already and get it over with? You're so wound up even Jasper isn't able to cut through it, which is just nuts. If anyone can get you to chill it's him."

"I don't even think Seth can help today Em. I'm sorry, I know I'm driving you all bonkers, but I just can't help it!!"

"Well, would you give it a shot please…for the sake of my sanity if nothing more!"

I smiled and blushed, "Okay, Em…for you."

I picked up my cell and texted Seth telling him Emmett's suggestion and asking if he were available. My phone rang nearly immediately.

"So why are you so nervous anyway?" were the first words I heard after my hello.

"You know, I can't really say. I just am!"

"Okay, well start with telling me what you keep thinking."

"I keep worrying about how I'm going to look in my dress, tripping over my shoes, stepping on his toes, looking like an idiot if I try to fast dance…should I keep going?"

He was laughing, "Okay, don't worry about how you'll look, your sisters will be sure that you look fabulous even if all you had to wear was a potato sack and you know it. In regard to the stepping on his toes, you performed a far more difficult dance on stage during your audition in ridiculously tall heels and managed not to step on his feet, so it's highly unlikely that you'll do it tonight. The afore mentioned difficult dance on stage also answers the question of fast dancing as well as the heels. So see…all the worry is for nothing."

I stood thinking for a moment and then finally responded. "Hey, you actually did manage to calm me down a little. Huh…"

He laughed again. "I think I'm starting to get a handle on how you think. I think I'm going to come out the other side of this friendship with a master's degree in Linaology!"

"Wow, so I'm that complicated huh? It takes a master's degree to fully cover all that is Lina?"

"I think it might take a doctorate for that!"

We both laughed. "Thanks Seth, I do feel a little better now, although now I'll have to deal with Emmett gloating for the next month."

"No problem, and I'm taking a day off today, so if you need talked down off the ledge again later then feel free to call."

"Thanks…wait…does that mean that you finished already?"

"Yep! Put on the finishing touches at 2am."

"But I have to wait a whole month before I get to see?"

"Yeah, I hate it too because I really want you to see it, but it's not worth a lawsuit. Besides, I might decide I want to tweak it between then and now."

"Well, no matter what, I'm proud of you for getting it done so fast. That's awesome!"

"What can I say, inspiration took over. I'm going to have to call you when I get my next big gig and see if you strike gold twice."

I laughed and then noticed I had a text message. It was as SOS from Leighton, so I explained to Seth and then called her right back.

"Help! Do you think your sisters would be willing to help me with my hair and stuff tonight? I can't get it to do anything I want it to do and I'm freaking out!"

I laughed, "You probably just made their day. I'll check and let you know. Malia want to come over for help too?"

"I'll call and ask while you check with your sisters. Call me right back?"

"Will do."

I opened the door to my room to find Alice standing there smiling at me. Two hours later we had rearranged our whole meet up arrangements with the boys and the girls were arriving at our house with their dresses and accessories in hand. Now the girls were going to get ready at our house and all the boys would come out here to pick us up and give us a great opportunity for some group shots before leaving for the dance. My mother was ecstatic to get pictures of us all together. She immediately began clearing the memory chip and making sure she had brand new batteries in the camera ready to go.

The three of us were lined up in chairs in Alice's bedroom for the following two hours getting full facials, makeovers, and hairdos. I was grateful that our beauty experts kept it toned down. When we were done, we looked glamorous, but not overly runway.

If you had told me a few hours ago that a ponytail could ever be dressy I would have laughed, but my sisters proved me wrong. Leighton stood in front of the mirror in her pink halter dress with her hair artfully parted almost like a reversed French braid draped across the top of her head as her long hair pulled back and forth across the top of her head and then stretched back into a long wavy ponytail that went halfway down her back. At the apex of her ponytail a large crystal rose hair comb was carefully placed to take up the space where the parting ended and the waves began. The effect was absolutely breathtaking.

Malia's look was more traditional but looked absolutely precious with her dress and frame. The girls had taken her long auburn streaked hair and curled it into ringlets and then pulled it up into a ponytail and then pinned three fourths of the curls around the ponytail in all directions leaving the rest to dangle freely from the bottom and sides of the design. Crystal encrusted star pins were then placed strategically throughout the mass of curls and a few precisely placed spirals were left dangling around her face.

I was the most impressed with my own results though. My hair has always been extremely thick and heavy and usually refuses to do more than lay flat against my head and back, but my sister's magic had transformed my typically lifeless hair. I looked in the mirror pleased to find that they managed to get my hair to stay in long flowing spirals that gently flowed down behind me covering my bare back exposed by the design of my halter dress. They had parted a large section of the front of my hair on the left side and draped it across tucking it securely behind my right ear and brought the rest of the forward section of my hair back and up to the crown of my head placing the comb that Bella had worn in her wedding there to hold it into place.

I almost couldn't believe that I was looking at my own reflection in the mirror. Just then Seth called. He laughed at how speechless I was over the result and requested I send him a picture so he could see for himself. I hung up and had a slightly confused Leighton take the picture with my phone and then sent it to Seth as requested. It took a long time for him to finally respond. It was only five words…_I told you…Absolutely Beautiful_. I blushed and replied a thank you just as my Mother walked in and started taking pictures of us girls in various poses. We had so much fun with the picture taking that we had totally lost track of the time until the doorbell rang downstairs announcing the arrival of our boys.

We came down the stairs in a procession, Leighton first, then Malia, and finally me. Once we were a few steps down we could see the boys standing below us in the atrium all three looking up toward us with wide eyes and mouths agape. I noticed at first that Connor's gaze was lingering on Leighton still when I made my appearance. I also noticed that Edward was standing behind him glaring at the back of his head with a look of annoyance. I could have sworn I heard a low growl coming from Edward too, but with all the noise in the room I couldn't be sure. The whole exchange was within no more than a few seconds and by the time I looked back to Connor's face he was beaming up at me. I walked up to stand in front of him and he smiled at me handing me something in a fairly large white box.

"You look beautiful," he told me as the kissed me on the cheek.

"Thank you," I whispered looking down at the strange white box. He opened it for me and pulled out a beautiful corsage made up of Sterling Roses. My mouth fell open.

"How did you know?" I asked with a twinkle of bewilderment in my eyes.

He smiled at me and nodded toward my family, "Some helpful birdies told me when I called the house line earlier this week for intel."

We posed for a few dozen more pictures of individual couples, girls only, boys only, large groups, both inside and outside before we were finally able to break free and head into town for the dance. Connor led me over to his Dad's Viper, which he managed to acquire again for the dance, and opened the door for me allowing me to slide into the passenger seat. He crossed back around to the driver side and after getting in he took my hand in his own and kissed it sweetly telling me how amazing I looked. He then put in the clutch and shifted through the gears while still holding on to my hand. It was almost like he didn't want to let go for some reason.

We arrived at the school to find that there was valet parking, so we pulled out front and the valet opened the door for me and offered me a hand to assist me in getting out of the car. Connor was at my side by the time I was out and standing straight, offering me his arm and guiding me into the front doors of the school. We walked in through the coat storage area to the table to pay for our admission.

Behind the table I could see that the commons area had been completely cleared with the exception of a few tables along the edges of the walls. The main floor was a huge dance floor with a DJ stand at the far end with large light stands on either side of the tables flooding the room in flashing red, yellow, and blue lights. While Connor was paying our admission the twins and their dates had come in behind us, so we waited for them just past the tables before entering the dance area. There was a area for formal couples pictures set up to our right in a little alcove that led to the sophomore hallway and Connor suggested that we take care of the pictures first before we started dancing and risked messing up our currently perfect looks. We took one group shot and each took individual couple shots. One thing was for sure; we'd have more than enough photo documentation of this night.

Finally we made our way out to the dance floor. I smiled as we walked out, finally able to see the full scope of decorations the committee had put out for the night. The ceiling was completely covered with maroon and gold helium balloons. There were also several on the floor which were filled with regular air. The normally boring gray brick walls had been curtained with shiny maroon and gold metallic streamers with also hang in various parts of the room from the rafters. I laughed a little as the full effect hit me. _Yeah, school spirit appears to have vomited all over this room. _I thought to myself as I spun one more time taking in the extreme effect of far too much shiny gold in such a relatively small space. The only thing that didn't seem to be festooned in maroon and gold were the trophy cases which lined the wall on either side of the gym doors behind the DJ station, but even that reflected the room back in glaring relief.

Obviously thinking what I was thinking Leighton leaned over giggling. "I think we need to volunteer Alice and Rose for the next dance committee. Even if you let them run free it wouldn't be this bad!"

As we finally reached the middle of the dance floor a slow song came on and Connor who had his arm around my waist leading me into the room up to this point grabbed the other side of my waist turning me toward him with a wide smile dominating his face and then moved his hands to my arms and brought them up around his neck smoothly and then returned his hands back to my waist pulling me very close to him. I tightened my arms around his neck as I pulled closer to him gently kissing him on the cheek and then pulling back again to my original position. Connor looked at me with a crooked smile on his face and then pulled me closer again leaning down to gently kiss my lips and then lingered so close that I could feel his hot breath on my lips. We rocked back and forth that way looking into each other's eyes for a few seconds and then he moved in the last few millimeters to kiss me again, but this time it was a deeper more passionate kiss that left me breathless. I hugged myself in closer to him, burying my face in his neck and taking a deep breath of his sweet smelling cologne. He had told me once it was called Curve, all I knew was that it smelled like heaven to me tonight. I was so completely content in this moment. It was so beautiful and perfect. I was swaying in the arms of this amazing guy that liked spending time with me. I thought that life couldn't get much better.

I stood there, hugging closely and swaying back and forth to the sweet melody when I felt Connor tense. He stayed tense a long time and then starting turning me as we swayed and moving me further up the dance floor. As we turned and moved I was eventually facing the direction that Connor had been when he had tensed up. I didn't see anything that would have caused it. All I could see were Malia and Riley cuddled as closely as any two people could be whispering in each other's ears and Leighton and Lucas rocking back and forth gazing lovingly in one another's eyes and occasionally kissing. They looked so sweet and I found myself wondering if that was what Connor and I looked like to the outside observer. Of course I wouldn't call what Connor and I had love, but we definitely seemed to be moving in the right direction…well emotionally at least, physically we were now all the way on the other side of the commons area near the blaring speakers.

I looked up at him questioningly as I winced at the loudness of the music. He crinkled his nose either in reaction to the volume himself or in reaction to my expression, I really wasn't sure which.

"Too loud?" he finally asked.

I shook my head yes enthusiastically. Once we were far enough away again that I could hear myself think I finally got up my nerve to ask, "Why did we move so far away from the others?"

He looked down at me and shrugged giving me a smile that wasn't entirely genuine. "I just wanted you all to myself I guess," he finally answered. He pulled me back close so that I was once again hugging him around the neck, but instead of floating in the euphoric bliss I had been a few moments before I was more wallowing in confusion than anything else.

As the night wore on things returned more to normal, especially during the fast songs. At the first break in the ballads Malia and Leighton found me again and drug me off to go dance with them while the boys went to get us all drinks from the concessions table. We had so much fun just dancing freely together not worrying what anybody else thought. I let my worries about Connor go and just had fun.

The boys returned after the first fast song with drinks in hand and we made our way over to a table to sit down for a little bit and cool off. It had been an excellent idea to get the pictures done early because I was getting pretty hot and was certain that my hair would be straight again in no time. I learned quickly that our boys were not big fans of the fast dances, so the girls and I would go strut our stuff when the music compelled us and then our boys would come join us when the music would go soft again.

The rest of the night went pretty smoothly. Connor seemed to be relaxed again and was so sweet to me, but I noticed that when we danced, he made a point of facing away from our friends. He kept asking if I was okay and offered one time when I got particularly warm if I wanted to take a walk outside to cool off. I took him up on the offer immediately, desperate for some fresh air and an escape from the pounding music. He took my hand and led me out the front doors and to a bench a little way up the sidewalk.

"Well, what do you think of your first dance? Am I showing you a good enough time?"

"I'm having a great time, Connor." I smiled up at him. "This has been so much fun. I was so worried, but it's been really fun."

"What were you worried about?"

"Oh looking silly, mutilating your feet with my sister's killer heels, things like that."

He laughed and hugged me around the shoulders kissing me on top of the head. "Silly girl, you win the lead in a school play that requires tricky choreography and yet you're worried about a regular old school dance."

"Yeah, that's what Seth said."

He looked over at me and frowned a little, "What does Seth have to do with it?"

"Oh, well I was driving my family nuts and so they told me to call and talk to him because he's usually able to chill me out when nobody else can." I said looking a little sheepish.

"Huh," he grunted, "I didn't realize you two were so close."

I blushed realizing that maybe Connor wasn't so cool with my Seth friendship after all. "Well, he's my best friend Connor." I said shrugging. "I told you that…or at least I thought I did."

He looked down at me like he was thinking really hard and then he smiled a little and squeezed my shoulder again, "I guess you did. I just didn't really understand exactly what you meant by 'best'. With some people it's just an enthusiastic way of saying friend, but you really mean it in the truest sense."

I smiled up widely, grateful for his understanding. "Yes! Exactly!"

"So, you cooled off enough yet?"

"Almost..." I hesitated for a moment, "I just was wondering…what was going on with you in there earlier tonight? Why do you keep leading us away from the twins and the girls during the slow songs?"

He looked sad for a moment and it was his turn to shrug and look sheepish this time. "Leighton and I have been friends forever and I don't know. I guess sometimes it bothers me to see her with Lucas. They're so serious and it's just kind of strange for me I guess. It was distracting for me, so I pulled us away so that I could focus on being here with you instead of being worried about her."

We sat there a moment as a strange lump formed in my stomach. It was something I hadn't really experienced before and couldn't place, but it wasn't good. Finally he shook off his sad face and stood up smiling back down to me and offering me his hand.

"Shall we m'lady." He asked with a chivalrous bow.

"Thank you, kind sir." I smiled back with a slight curtsy as I rose. We walked back in and rejoined the others at a table near a vent that was shooting cool air down from the ceiling.

We enjoyed the rest of our night together dancing very close during the slow dances and sharing a few more somewhat passionate kisses. When Connor took me home he walked me to the door and gave me a long sweet goodnight kiss. I walked in the front door feeling a little conflicted. By all official accounts I had a wonderful first dance. I had fun with my friends and was treated very chivalrously by my date, but there was still that strange knot deep in my gut that left me feeling unsettled.

To my surprise the house was unusually quiet. Only Edward and Bella were home. Bella was seated in the living room with her schoolbooks spread out all around her. She smiled up at me as I walked in, but being a private person herself, she never pushed for details like the rest of my siblings did. If I wanted to talk then she was more than happy to listen, but she didn't hover. I could hear Edward playing the piano in the music room upstairs and as I realized that he was home the tune bridged into my lullaby as he welcomed me back.

I walked wearily upstairs and tossed the shoes that were now strangling my toes in the far corner and changed out of my dress into some comfy sweats. I went into the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth, leaving Bella's comb in their bedroom before going back to my room to call Seth before I crashed.

"Hey Cinderella." Were the first words out his mouth when he picked up the phone.

"Hey yourself."

"So, how was the ball?"

"Pretty good, I think, it was fun."

"So what's with the 'I think' part? Shouldn't you know?"

"There were just some strange things that happened, but I'm not sure how much was my over reacting."

"Like what?"

"Oh…you know what…I'm just too tired to get into it tonight. Can we save it for tomorrow after I've slept on it and really put it together in my own mind first?"

"Sure, but just tell me this, was he nice to you and show you a good time at least?"

I smiled to myself, "Yes, he definitely did that."

"Well then it was a good time and that's all you really need to bring out of the experience. The rest was probably all your basic high school drama stuff that in the long run isn't all that important."

"You think?"

"Well, I don't know any details so I don't know for sure, but probably."

"Thanks Seth," I sighed. Even when he didn't have any details at all he still knew what to say to make me feel better. "I promise I'll tell you more tomorrow okay? Right now I just really need some sleep."

"Okay Lina, you sleep tight okay?"

"You too Seth. Sweet dreams"

I closed my phone and lay down with my hair fanned out over my pillow above my head. I pulled the covers up under my chin and mulled over the events of the night. Maybe I was just being over sensitive and concerned over nothing. I fell asleep fretting about the events of the night and how I would possibly explain it all to Seth tomorrow in a way that made any sense at all to someone who wasn't there to see it themselves. I fell into a fitful sleep, my subconscious still trying to sort out my feelings in my dreams.


	31. Chapter 31

**31. The Talk**

I woke up to the sound of the doorbell and looked at the clock to see that it was already ten. A few seconds later Edward was knocking on my door telling me that Connor was here to see me. I told him to ask him to wait a few minutes and I'd be right down as I hopped up to run in the bathroom to brush my teeth and hair and throw on some clothes. I came downstairs to find all of the shades drawn. Connor had opted to wait outside for me. I opened the door to see him sitting in a rocker by the front door looking very conflicted. I wasn't sure what was going on, but when he looked up at me with sad eyes and asked "Can we go somewhere and talk?" I had a feeling I wasn't going to like this conversation.

It was an unusually warm and sunny day out for our normally cloud covered part of the world. I decided that it might be nice to soak up some vitamin D on the wrap around porch while we talked so I said "Sure" and took his hand leading him around the side of the house where the sun was the strongest and sat down leaning my back against the railing. He sat across from me leaning his back against the house. I closed my eyes soaking in the heat and waiting for him to begin.

He crossed his legs and leaned forward taking both of my hands in his and he studied them with a serious expression. "I'm such a stupid moron, but I have to level with you because until I do, I'm not being fair to you."

An ice cold knot formed in my stomach, not knowing what was coming next. He looked up at me with sad eyes as he started. "I want you to know that I like you, a lot. You're this totally amazing girl. You're smart, funny, compassionate, caring, and beautiful and the more I got to know you the more I liked you. I wanted to fall for you, I really did. Ugh…Why are things always so complicated?!" he sighed looking disgusted with himself.

I just watched him not really understanding what he was trying to say. He looked at my confused expression and then tried to clarify. "The truth is that when I met you, I was already head over heels for somebody else…but she's in a relationship. So when I met you and you were so awesome and I really liked hanging out with you and talking to you I hoped that maybe I could fall for you and finally be able to move on. You are just so amazing, I'd be so lucky to have a girl like you…but it didn't work. No matter how hard I tried, I just can't get over my feelings for her and you deserve so much better than that. After last night, I knew I had to tell you the truth."

I sat there in shock as waves of understanding rolled through my body as the chill of the knot in my core began to spread across my chest. I wasn't in love with Connor, but he was the first boy that I ever dated, held hands with, hugged and kissed and I really did like him. Even though I didn't love him, the rejection still stung deep inside my chest as I struggled to keep the tears from pooling in my eyes. He looked at me, his eyes searching for something. I couldn't blame him; after all you can't control your emotions and he didn't have to be honest with me. He could keep on going and leaving me in peril of truly falling for somebody who didn't love me back. He was such a good guy, so honorable. I took a deep breath and let out a sigh as I tried to figure out how to respond.

I battled the sting that was starting to make the cold spread down my back and arms and did my best to smile at the honorable boy sitting in front of me. "Love is such an unpredictable thing. Trust me, I've watched it over and over with my family…it has no rhyme or reason and you have no control over it. How can I fault you for that? Thank you for being honest with me."

He looked at me in shock his mouth hanging open and then he suddenly threw up his hands with a look of frustration on his face, "See! I'm so stupid…you are such incredible person. What the hell is wrong with me?" he yelled burying his face in his hands.

I reached over and pulled his hands from his face and held them in mine again. Seeing how truly conflicted he was made it much easier now to talk without fear of my tears betraying my sadness. "Listen to me Connor. I believe that every person comes into our lives for a reason. They teach us about the things we do and don't want in the person that we will one day share our future with. You are a wonderful guy, sweet, caring, and honorable. I am so glad that I can look back someday and know that my first date, the first guy that I ever held hands with, danced with, and kissed was such a sweet and wonderful person who I hope will still be a good friend. We may not be in love, but you can't deny that we enjoy each other's company…and that's okay."

He shook his head slightly looking at my face with the warmest expression. "Wow, I envy the guy who gets lucky enough to win your heart someday."

I gave him a light punch in the arm while shooting him a crooked smile, "Ditto. Speaking of people who own your heart, do I know this girl who has so inadvertently stolen yours?"

He blushed and looked away not wanting to give away his secret. Suddenly the pieces fit together…the sadness in his eyes when he talked about our friends at school on our first date, the way he always looked away when they got too lovey dovey while we were around, the way he kept moving us further and further away from the group at the homecoming dance…

I grabbed his knee in my surprise gasping "Oh my God…you're in love with Leighton! It all makes sense now."

He looked panicked when I revealed my theory, "Oh Lina, please, PLEASE don't say anything. Lucas is one of my best friends, I would never do anything to hurt him and she doesn't think of me that way at all."

"Calm down Connor, I won't say anything, I swear." He looked slightly relieved, but still tense. "Wow, well I can't say as I blame you. Leighton is an amazing girl. If I were a boy I'd probably have a thing for her too."

"You have to understand though; it's not just a crush. We grew up together. Our parents were friends when we were young, before my Dad's company went global and my parents stopped caring about anything but work. We were best friends from the time we were able to walk and well she's always been part of my life and I've loved her ever since before I was even old enough to know what that meant. It's been so hard watching her with Lucas, but at the same time I know he's a great guy too. He's not bad for her or anything…yet I still just hate seeing them together. Last night made it abundantly clear that it doesn't matter how much I like you, I'm just not able to move on yet, and it is unfair of me to keep going with you while I still have such strong feelings for her."

I felt pity for the beautiful boy that had just rejected me. I couldn't be angry at him. He was hurting far more than I was. Whatever sting of rejection I felt was tiny in comparison to the pain he endured every day he had to watch the girl he loved with his best friend. It had to be like his own personal hell.

We sat for a while in silence and then he started the conversation again, trying to change the subject.

"So, what about you? Is there anybody else?"

I looked down feeling a bit sheepish. "Not really, I mean I do have this really amazing friendship with Seth. There's no future beyond that for us though. He lives 3,000 miles away in Washington State."

"Do you really like the guy?"

I shrugged not really wanting to admit it to myself any more than I wanted to admit to anybody else. "He's got a good heart and I can talk to him about anything."

"Do you find yourself thinking about him all the time and don't feel like your day is complete unless you've talked to him?"

I looked up at him, taken aback by his question. I had said many times that my day was incomplete without talking to Seth. Actually he agreed that it was the same way for him and compared it to a day ending without a sunset. Also I had often marveled at how much Seth occupied my thoughts. I always tried to dismiss it, ignore it, convince myself that it was just the closeness of our friendship, but suddenly I was keenly aware I was about to be forced to admit the truth and it scared me. I hesitated a bit longer and then biting my lip nervously I finally responded.

"Now that you mention it…yeah."

"Then what's a few thousand miles? I wouldn't let a few thousand miles stand between Leighton and me if she were single and seemed interested."

"Connor, this is completely different," I attempted to rationalize as a big warm ball of excitement rose in my stomach replacing the cold that had so recently crept through my body as my mind floated past the parade of prospects, but still trying to deny it all. "I don't know if he is even interested. I haven't known him my whole life, or grown up with him, or even ever met him face to face! It's not the same thing at all."

"Hey you said it yourself. Love has no rhyme or reason and it sounds to me like you might just feel that way about him, even if you won't admit it."

I rolled my eyes trying to stay casual but failing completely as my heart pounded relentlessly in my chest. Did I love Seth? Was that even possible having never even met him in person? Connor saw my expression and laughed scooting over next to me and putting his arm around my shoulder.

"Well, we're quite a pair aren't we?" He laughed.

I chuckled too laying my head on his shoulder just like I had the night of our second date. "We certainly are my friend. We certainly are!"

We sat and talked for another half an hour after that about other things that were going on in our lives. Thankfully the emotional exchange we had just shared didn't seem to mess up how comfortable we were with one another. Actually it was quite freeing to just be with him as a friend with no pressure of a relationship. Clouds began to form in the sky blotting out the nice warm sun leaving the air a bit too chilly to stay in our spot on the porch. Connor helped me stand and walked me to the front door saying that he needed to get home. He gave me a big hug.

"Thank you for understanding and being a good friend."

"Thank you for being honest with me about your true feelings. I think this is better anyway." I responded with a wink and a smile.

He smiled warmly back, "Me too." And then turned and made his way back down to his waiting car. I waved as he drove away, a bit of the sadness returning to my heart.

"Goodbye my first boyfriend." I whispered into the wind as tears filled my eyes. I was once again single in a world of couples.

I didn't even pause as I walked through the house and up to my room. I didn't want to talk about it. I needed some time to myself to work through it on my own and I knew that no words of wisdom from my family would be able to help me this time. I laid down on my bed and let the tears silently roll down my face as the coldness reclaimed my body. I couldn't tell you exactly why I was crying. I knew it was irrational in many ways but I just needed to let it flow and then hopefully I could let it go. My chest physically ached as I lay there trying to process my emotions and understand them. I was laying there for what must have been an hour when my cell phone began to ring. I knew from the ring tone that it was Seth.

"Hello?"

"You ready to talk about it yet?" He sounded really worried.

"Who called?" I responded a bit annoyed.

"Edward. He said to give you some time and then he thought you could use a shoulder to cry on, but he didn't think that you wanted any of them…something about happy couples were the last thing you wanted sympathy from."

I laughed softly, my brother understood me even better than I did.

"So?"

"We broke up, but we're still friends."

"Why?"

"He's in love with one of my friends, even though she's with someone else. They grew up together. He said he wanted to fall for me, thought I might be the girl that could help him get over her, but he realized last night that it didn't work."

"Hmmm…I'm sorry."

"You know, it's not so much that he's in love with someone else that hurts or that I was even in love with him or anything, it's just this sting of rejection that's bothering me I think. It just hurts a little, but I can't be mad at him over it either. As much as I hurt, he must feel even worse."

"I bet you're right. It's tough to see the one you love involved with someone else." He said with a genuine sadness I had never heard before filling his voice.

"You sound like you're speaking from experience."

He was quiet for a moment and then I barely heard him as he whispered, "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Well, I think it really is all for the best in the end though. We were able to talk it through and even sat and talked as friends for a while afterward. I think we'll be okay as far as being around each other and stuff goes. But it still hurts in a way." My voice cracked as I said the last bit as quiet sobs began to resurface from my chest.

"I know it does sweetie, I know it does. But you'll be fine. Someday you're going to meet someone who you feel as strongly about as Connor does for this girl, and he'll feel the same way right back and then it will all just fall together as it should be."

"I hope so. I hope there's a guy out there with a good heart that is waiting for me. I hope I'm not destined to be alone." I replied barely audible.

"You're not Lina…I believe that with all of my heart. You'll find that someone someday. I promise you that."

We sat for a while in silence as I tried to believe what Seth was saying. I wanted to believe it…but then I thought of Leah. Not everybody finds their special someone. Maybe I would be like Leah and find myself sad and alone. I tried to push these thoughts from my mind as I realized that we hadn't spoken in a couple of minutes.

I finally broke the silence, "Oh sorry Seth, I sort of got lost in my own thoughts there for a while. I need to talk about something else. What's going on with the big project? Are you still happy or have you found some things you want to tweak?"

We talked for a while about his work and my school projects and the upcoming play. He expressed concern about Connor and me playing opposite each other with all that had gone on, but I told him that I didn't think it would be a problem and I honestly believe that we were going to stay good friends. We managed to stay on the phone for another three hours just talking about the things going on in our lives, only stopping when my stomach began to grumble unhappily at me.

"Okay, you seriously need to go eat something. I can hear your stomach growling from here!"

"Yeah, because super sensitive wolf hearing doesn't help with that at all or anything." I joked back. I looked at the clock and it was already three in the afternoon.

We both laughed and said our goodbyes as I made my way downstairs to the kitchen. There was a note on the counter. We left lasagna in the fridge for you to warm up when you were ready. We all went hunting to give you some privacy, but we're close and can be there quickly if necessary. Call if you need us. We will be back around eight. Love, Mom.

All this time I hadn't even realized that they weren't around. I had gotten so used to the idea of not having any privacy that I didn't even really think about it anymore. I was glad that they had given me some space to work though my emotions without an audience. I will have to remember to thank them properly when they get home. I thought to myself throwing my dinner in the microwave and making my way over to stick in a DVD as it warmed. I decided that since I had the house to myself I would take full advantage by watching a movie while I ate. I chose a slapstick comedy and settled down with my warm food and a glass of Dr. Pepper to watch in solitude.


	32. Chapter 32

**32. Replay**

The movie was over halfway over when my cell phone rang.

"You ready for some company yet?" Nessie asked a little too cheerfully than I was ready for.

_Not Really_ I wanted to say, but instead I said "Sure" with a sigh.

"I'll be there in a couple of minutes," she said quickly and then the line was dead.

Sure enough less than two minutes later she was walking in the front door with a sympathetic smile on her face.

"How are you?" she asked with concern in her eyes.

"As good as can be expected I guess. It's still kind of tough you know, being rejected."

She nodded as if she understood, but I was well aware of her life. Nessie had never met a solitary person in her life who didn't adore her. It was just something innate about her that was hard not to love. And as far as relationships go, Jacob was always there. I guess she had gotten a slight taste of it when at 7 years old she reached full maturity; a full gambit of teenage hormones included, and started feeling attracted to Jacob. Honoring a promise to Bella and Edward, Jacob fought his own attraction to keep her at arms length a bit longer to give her more time to adjust to her newfound maturity before getting involved in such a serious relationship. So maybe she did get it to a degree.

She sat down next to me on the couch reaching over to put her arm around my shoulders and pulling me so my head rested on her shoulder. She ran her fingers through my hair and then reached over taking my hand and began to show me what she was thinking.

Suddenly instead of the TV I saw the dining table with my entire family seated around it listening with rapt attention. I heard myself come down the stairs and Edward tell me that Connor was waiting outside for me and then I saw Edward walk into view standing just inside the dining room doorway. My field of vision was suddenly filled with Jacob's face looking concerned in my direction and then the gaze returned to Edward. I never even knew that Jacob and Nessie had been in the dining room this morning when Connor had arrived.

"He's here to admit to her how he feels for Leighton. He feels really badly, he doesn't want to hurt her feelings. He really does like Lina, but he feels he's doing the right thing by telling her the truth." Edward explained to the table filled with my loved ones.

"Oh, my poor Lina," my Mother said looking toward where we were sitting.

"She's feeling a strong sense of dread." Jasper spoke up. "She knows that it's bad news I think."

Edward nodded in agreement with Jasper's assessment.

Connor's words carried in to the sensitive ears of those sitting in the dining room, _"I want you to know that I like you, a lot. You're this totally amazing girl. You're smart, funny, compassionate, caring, and beautiful and the more I got to know you the more I liked you. I wanted to fall for you, I really did. Ugh…Why are things always so complicated?!"_

"At least the boy knows what he's missing out on. He's not a total idiot." Emmett said rolling his eyes.

"Shh" Rosalie hissed slapping his arm, "I want to hear."

The rest of Connor's explanation floated in on the air and then Edward hissed low under his breath. Everyone's eyes shot to his face for enlightenment. "She's hurting. She's feeling very rejected and recognizes that she doesn't love him necessarily, but it hurts all the same."

My mother sighed and reached out for my father's hand feeling for my pain.

He paused for a second listening with his other sense. "Wow! She never ceases to amaze me. Now she's feeling sorry for him and is grateful that he's being honorable about everything." He paused for another second listening and then added, "Now she's fighting tears."

The vision blurred as I felt moisture roll down my cheek. Nessie was crying for me. A flash of a memory from many years ago when Jacob had a similar discussion with her invaded the memory of the event. Nessie must have been relating to my situation. She understood how I was feeling far more than I had realized.

Our conversation floated back and forth across the air as we continued. They all listened intently, letting Edward or Jasper comment to fill in the blanks occasionally.

"Wow, that kid is really hurting. He's not exaggerating when he says he loves the girl. The emotions he carries for her is nearly as strong as those we have for our own mates. He will probably never move past them." Jasper commented calmly as Connor explained his feelings and past with Leighton.

Then I heard Connor's question, _"So, what about you? Is there anybody else?"_

My voice answered back, _"Not really, I mean I do have this really amazing friendship with Seth. There's no future beyond that for us though. He lives 3,000 miles away in Washington State."_

Knowing looks bounced around the room, but the one that particularly caught my attention was Jacob. It was a strange expression that filled his face. Was it concern?

Our voices continued, _"Do you really like the guy?"_

_"He's got a good heart and I can talk to him about anything."_

_"Do you find yourself thinking about him all the time and don't feel like your day is complete unless you've talked to him?"_

There was a long silence during which all heads shifted simultaneously to Edward's face again. Our conversation continued as Edward focused on my thoughts. A wide smile filled his face as he whispered, "I thought so!" Smiles filled the room as they realized that I was putting two and two together in my own mind, but the silence continued on for what seemed like an eternity to the immortals.

"So, has she finally realized she loves him yet or what?" Emmett asked impatiently as every continued to stare at Edward.

"Yes, but she's still fighting it. She's not sure of herself completely yet and doesn't believe it's possible that Seth could return her affections." He said with a look of annoyance.

Jacob's face once again filled my vision as he looked in the direction of Nessie's gaze and had a look of relief on his face. I saw him reach for her hand and then for a split second something else filled my vision. A gangly tan wolf howling in agony, I knew immediately it was Seth, he was hurting. It was only for a split second and then it disappeared again.

I suddenly let go of Nessie's hand sitting straight up not wanting to go forward without explanation of what I just saw. "Nessie! What was that? That was Seth, but he was hurting. I could FEEL his pain. He was so sad. What was that?"

"Nothing," she said, "just an errant thought."

"No, don't lie to me Ness, he was hurting! How did you see that? It was almost like you were feeling what he was feeling, but you can't do that!"

"No, but when they are both wolves Jacob can…and sometimes, on very rare occasions and only with Jacob, our connection has been two way. It was something that had filtered through from Jacob's mind."

Before she could say another word I was up dialing Seth's number. As I waited for him to answer I turned to Nessie with my hand over the mouthpiece. "Sorry Ness, I have to talk to him now. If he's hurting like that I have to help him!" I blurted as I ran up the stairs to my room. Nessie's face as I walked away was this strange mixture of concern and accomplishment. I couldn't take the time to process it now though. I needed to help Seth.

After several rings the call went to Seth's voicemail. I was nearly panicked as I left him a message, "Seth, it's Lina. Please call me back ASAP. Nessie just showed me something that led me to believe that something is wrong. Are you okay? Please call me back and let me know that you are okay. Let me be there for you, please. I'll be waiting for your call."

I hung up and plopped on my bed my head was reeling. I knew from when the vision took place that this was obviously at some point prior to my conversation with Connor. I had whined all day to Seth and he listened to me knowing that he was hurting himself. I felt like such a horrible friend. So selfish…that should be written on my headstone when I die. _Here lies Lina, the most selfish, self centered person to ever walk the earth, and horrible friend._

I sat there for the rest of the night kicking myself as a return call continued not to come. Finally I got a text.

_Calm Down…I'm fine. There will be a package arriving tomorrow. Call me after you get home tomorrow night and I'll explain everything then._

I read the text several times wondering what on earth could be in the package. I read it a couple more times and then texted back.

**Promise me you're really and truly okay and then I'll wait for the rest for tomorrow.**

_I promise, now please got to sleep, it's nearly midnight there._

I looked over at my clock in shock. The entire night had escaped me. I laid down still stressing about what was really going on with Seth. I was very anxious to hear what he had to say. Between dealing with the Connor break up fall out and waiting to get Seth's explanation, school and then having to stay after for rehearsals was going to be agony.


	33. Chapter 33

**33. The Perfect Song**

I walked through the day at school in a daydream. I kept thinking about what was to come this evening. The suspense over what could possibly be in the package from Seth was excruciating. A close second was fielding the endless questions of our friends over my breakup with Connor.

"I just don't understand it!" Leighton whined, "You two were so cute Saturday night. How did you go from that to breaking up in just a day?"

I wasn't prepared with an adequate cover story. I was desperately wishing that Connor and I had come up with a believable story since he didn't want the real reason to come to light. I finally shrugged, "We talked Sunday and just realized that we were better as friends. All they physical stuff was more just about the newness, not necessarily anything else."

"I don't know what to say. First of all, that's so unlike Connor to be so hands on with someone he's not totally into. Not to mention that you seemed so into him too. I just don't understand."

I debated on whether or not I should make myself the bad guy to save Connor from the scrutiny. I risked losing my only girl friends though if I did. I was sure Leighton would be defensive of her childhood friend. Finally I decided to find a middle ground. "It was a lot of things, but I think the biggest is that he was uncomfortable with my relationship with Seth."

"You mean the guy you sent the text picture of yourself in your dress the night of the dance?" I nodded. She frowned and I could see some anger behind her eyes. "Well, I can't say as I blame him. I thought that was a little inappropriate myself. It bothered me when you did that because it seemed like you had something else going on with that guy beyond friendship…especially when you read whatever it was that he wrote back after that."

"What can I say? He's my best friend. It was innocent enough. I had been freaking out that morning about my fashion sense and dancing and stuff and he calmed me down. So when I was so amazed by the end result of the makeover that he told me my sisters would pull off no matter what, he wanted to see for himself."

"Well, I still thought it was inappropriate and obviously it bothered Connor too. He wouldn't have just ended things without a good reason."

_Well he had a good one, not that you've ever noticed._ I spat back in my head, but then revised my thoughts to something that wasn't so full of annoyance. "I'm not the only one with a best friend of the opposite sex Leighton. I thought of all people you would understand." Without waiting for an explanation I turned and made my way to Trig.

Connor was already there and smiled up at me sheepishly from his desk. I detailed the conversation I had just had with Leighton and he thanked me apologizing for putting me in such a position and promising to smooth things over with her. By the time I saw her again in Sociology she was civil to me, but far from showing the same friendliness that she had before I got involved with Connor.

The rest of the day drug on in an endless sea of lectures which I couldn't quite focus on. Rehearsals were torture. Every person in the room was scrutinizing Connor and me as each one was looking for some act of bitterness that would provide good gossip fodder. To their great disappointment, we were as comfortable and got along as well as ever. We were laughing and having fun together on stage as we rehearsed the drive in scene. In all honesty it was easier now that we weren't officially in a relationship because now it felt less like some aspect of our relationship were on display and more like we were simply acting. By the end of rehearsals I knew that things with Connor and I working together were going to be just fine.

As soon as we were released from rehearsals I practically ran to my car and raced home at top speed. I ran in the back door waving hello to my family as I sprinted to my room to find the package that Seth had promised would arrive during the day today. I opened it to find a web cam, a CD, and a note. I studied the CD for a second and then opened the folded note.

_Hi Lina, I've been planning on sending this to you for a while and decided that I should go ahead and do it today for our conversation. I figured it was time to speak face-to-face, or at least as face-to-face as you can be living 3,000 miles apart. Plug this in to your computer and follow the directions on the package to install it. After you're done this put the CD in your player, but don't press play until I tell you to. When you're all set call me and I'll talk you through setting up our first live chat. Look forward to talking to you live soon. -__Seth_

I tore open the packaging, as I set up my laptop on my bed and booting it up. I set up the web cam following the directions and got all set on my computer. I then went over and unplugged my small portable stereo and brought it over to my bedside table plugging it in nearby and placing the CD in gently. I looked around to make sure I was ready and everything was within reach of my perch on the bed in front of my computer. I picked up my cell phone, shaking a little in anticipation of talking to Seth live on the net, as I dialed his number.

A few short instructions later I sat looking at Seth's face on my computer. I sat there for a minute just staring at his beautiful smile. It was a lot cuter than I had ever realized from the few pictures we had exchanged. The first few seconds were completely surreal as I stared at Seth's changing expressions as he spoke to me. This was SO much better than talking on the phone because I could see behind his eyes the things that weren't coming out of his mouth. Although this could also be bad too because now he was going to be able to read my expressions like an open book as well.

"Well hi there" he said his wide smile gleaming at me through the screen.

I was uncontrollably blushing immediately. "Hi" I said back a little nervously.

"Wow, you blush just like Bella used to! I never knew that!"

"Yeah," I said looking down and blushing deeper. "It's a curse."

He frowned a little bit as he responded slowly, "No it's not…it's nice."

I smiled shyly. It was so strange how the fact he could see me made me so much more self-conscious. Then suddenly I remembered what I had seen the night before in Nessie's vision and my altered self awareness disappeared in the wake of my concern for Seth. "Okay Seth, you made me wait all of this time, are you okay?"

He stared at me through the computer screen with such a serious gaze that I was worried for a moment that he was mad that I was pushing the issue or something. Then his gaze dropped and he looked nervous or worried.

"Seth, please, I want, no I need you to talk to me. It's hard to explain what I saw and how, but I could feel your sadness. I hate to see you hurting so much. Please talk to me." I begged across cyber space.

"I…I just don't know what to say or how to say it. All I really knew is that I wanted it to be as face to face as I could possibly make it." He said looking straight at me from his place on my screen. It almost felt like he was looking into my soul from where he was sitting all the way across the country.

"Face to face is good." I said with a smile. "Talking is good with it though." I halfway joked.

"Well, how about we just talk like a regular day for a while first before we get into the rest of it." He suggested. I could see on his face that he was stalling, but more than that, he was also curious about something.

"Ooookay, did you have something particular in mind?"

"How did school go today?" he asked with a smile. He was serious…it was going to be a run of the mill conversation only with live video to go along with it.

"Stinking agony would be the most accurate term I can think of off the top of my head." I said rolling my eyes to the ceiling. He laughed automatically and I decided immediately that I liked seeing his face while hearing his laughter. As much as his laugh alone made me feel more cheerful, his face made me even more so.

"Besides the torture of waiting to come home to hear from you, I had to deal with break up fall out…and ironically none of it was coming from Connor. Leighton about took my head off though. I didn't really have a reason to give her for the breakup so I told her that he was jealous of my relationship with you."

His eyebrows shot up at that, "Really?"

I smiled, "Yeah, it wasn't far from the truth. The night of the dance I brought you up and he acted pretty jealous and then yesterday he asked about you again." I noticed the wide smile that flooded his face at the news. It sent a little thrill up my spine and made my stomach lurch slightly. I continued trying to pretend that I hadn't noticed, "Anyway, she started in on me how she had thought it very inappropriate of me to send you that pic from my phone of me in my dress and read me the right act. It wasn't exactly pleasant." I finished with a frown.

"What exactly did he ask about me yesterday?"

I blushed a deep crimson and ducked my head in an attempt to hide my embarrassment. I looked back up at his face on the screen through my eyelashes and then answered him meekly. "He asked if I had someone else that I had feelings for and asked if maybe it was you."

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him that you had a good heart and I could talk to you about anything, but it wasn't the same as him and Leighton because we've never actually met and you live so far away."

He looked a little disappointed and then he looked at me very seriously measuring his words before he spoke. "And if I didn't live so far away?"

My eyes widened as I realized what he was suggesting and my breath caught in my chest. My heart began to accelerate and I could feel my hands shaking slightly in my lap. "I guess that would depend."

He cocked his head slightly and looked at me with such intensity that I felt like I was going to burst into flame in response. "On what?"

I returned is gaze with matched intensity as I responded, "You, I guess." As soon as the words escaped my mouth I looked down shyly. I couldn't believe I just admitted to that. My hands were still trembling in my lap as I heard his beautiful voice.

"Lina, look up…please." I slowly returned my gaze to the screen to see a warm smile spread across his face and a sweet sparkle in his eyes. "Do you have the CD nearby?"

This time I was the one cocking my head questioningly. "Yes, it's that kid you said you were listening to so much lately right?"

"Yeah, It was a fluke that I found it. I was going through some of our stuff in storage and found it in a box of Leah's stuff from around the time that all that drama surfaced with Sam. Anyway, I listened to it for the heck of it and I just couldn't stop because, well," He looked down shyly for a second and then looked up with a small sigh, "to be honest some of the songs reminded me of you. I've been listening to it pretty much ever since. When I first heard it I could have sworn I had written the song myself because, well, it's exactly how I've been feeling." I stared at him with wide eyes as I listened to him in disbelief. I was beginning to question whether or not this was real or a dream. It just seemed like something I would dream up, things that I wished he would be saying to me. He continued, "Just hit play. I want you to listen to the first track."

I picked up the CD jewel case and looked at the picture of the boy on the front. He was very young when the CD came out, probably not more than sixteen or seventeen. His name was David Archuleta. I reached over pressing play on the stereo without looking and listened as the song started playing.

_I hung up the phone tonight  
Something happened for the first time  
Deep inside  
it was a rush, what a rush  
Cause the possibility  
That you would ever feel the same way  
About me  
It's just too much, just too much_

_Why do I keep running from the truth  
All I ever think about is you  
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized  
And I just got to know_

I looked up from the jewel case, my eyes wide and my mouth open as the words floated through the air. He was looking at me with such worry in his eyes; he was really putting him self out there by sharing this with me. Suddenly I couldn't see him very clearly anymore through the blur caused by the tears welling in my eyes. I bit my lower lip as I listened in amazement unable to tear my gaze away from his.

_Do you ever think  
When you're all alone  
All that we can be  
Where this thing could go  
Am I crazy or falling in love  
Is it real or just another crush  
Do you catch your breath  
When I look at you  
Are you holding back  
Like the way I do  
Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away  
But I know this crush aint going away, going away_

I reached up and wiped a tear away as I smiled at him through the web camera pointed at me. I was more than a little surprised to see him wipe a tear of his own as I stared at the beautiful boy who was trying to tell me that he cared about me, and in the sweetest way I could have ever imagined. I had so much pressure in my chest from the pure joy that I felt like it could explode out of its cavity at any second. Suddenly every intimate moment that I had shared with Connor that had seemed so amazing and captivating at the time seemed so trivial, this one small gesture shadowing them all so completely.

_Has it ever crossed your mind  
When were hangin, spending time girl,  
Are we just friends  
Is there more, is there more  
See it's a chance we've gotta take  
Cause I believe that we can make this into  
Something that will last, last forever, And Ever_

The song continued on, repeating the same sentiments over and over, but I no longer heard the tune, all I could hear was the message that Seth was trying to send me. It was more than just a crush and I was not alone in this feeling. I reached over turning down the music so it was just background as I wiped another tear from my cheek and tried to find some words, any words to convey what I wanted to say. All I finally managed was a simple question.

"Is this real?"

He laughed the gentle laugh that had given me solace many times over the past few weeks that now gave me a chill in my core. "Yes Lina," he smiled at me, obviously pleased by my reaction, "It's real sweetie."

"But…how? I mean, do you really feel that way about _me_?"

He rolled his eyes a little, "No I only said the song reminded me of you because I don't feel that way about you at all." He responded a little too sarcastically, I was guessing out of nerves and then he smiled one of those killer smiles that had caught me off guard as soon as the video link was connected, "Of course I feel that way about you."

I looked at him blankly, unable to believe that this beautiful boy would ever see me like this. I reached over and pinched myself hard on the arm just to be sure, leaving a huge red welt there. Seth began to laugh hysterically as he watched me…I had forgotten in that instant that the video feed went both ways. I blushed reflexively and then mumbled, "Just checking". I just couldn't process how this could be real, but if there was any true test of reality, the pinch test had clinched it.

"Lina, it's real honey. It's as real as anything I've ever known." He said sweetly in that way that he always made me feel that he really meant exactly what he was saying.

"So, um, I'm just trying to grasp reality here." Suddenly a thought hit me, a thought that terrified me more than a little. I had grown up knowing all about imprinting, getting to watch it at it's finest with Nessie and Jake. I was instantly gripped with the fear that maybe this was all due to imprinting. Maybe none of it was really about me at all, maybe even our friendship was a result of a biological imperative. Of course I knew it was more than that, but a part of me thought it was the only thing that made sense…the only way Seth would ever develop these types of feelings for me. I decided to ask him and get it out in the open. "So, um, is this an imprinting thing?"

He looked down a second and then looked back up. "No. A part of me wishes it were, but no. I don't think I will ever imprint. If I didn't imprint on you of all people, considering how I feel about you, then I can't imagine imprinting on anybody."

I was instantly relieved. His feelings for me were real, because of me. I felt special, almost empowered by the fact that his feelings were genuine and all due to liking the person that I was, not some mythical bonding thing that forced the wolf into a particular relationship. My relief only lasted for a few minutes as a dark thought passed through the transients of my mind…Leah.

Seth noticed my face fall and he immediately became concerned. "Lina, what's wrong? Are you okay? What are you thinking?"

My eyes wandered over the shapes of his face wildly as my mind calculated the risks. Panic had taken over any rational thought and I couldn't organize my thoughts in any way that made sense to me, much less to come out in any form of rationality for him to understand. I could hear his voice getting frantic, so I finally did my best to try to explain.

"I was so relieved when you first told me that, but now I'm panicking." I looked up straight into the eyes of my Seth on the screen. "What if you do imprint on someone else, later, after we let this all happen for real? I…I don't think I could handle that, handle losing you after having just found you." Tears were brimming in my eyelids again as I finished the last part of the statement. Just the thought made me feel like I had been kicked in the gut by a newborn vampire.

When I looked back up to the screen again after wiping away my tears, I could see that Seth was reaching toward me, most likely touching my face on the screen wishing he could touch me in person to comfort me as much as I was wishing he were here to comfort me. "Shh…Lina. I really honestly don't believe that will happen. I don't think it could."

"Don't you think Sam thought the same thing before he met Emily? I know Jake did before he imprinted on Nessie." I said now bordering on hysterical.

"I'm sorry Lina, I shouldn't have told you." He said looking down in disappointment. Suddenly I was even more upset.

"No, don't say that! Please don't say that Seth! I'm glad you told me. I'm just scared."

"So am I…in a way," he whispered back, "but at the same time I'm happy. I'm happy that now I know you feel the same way. I'm not agonizing over that fact, knowing you're off kissing someone else and not even knowing how much I care."

Suddenly my panic disappeared as my heart froze in my chest, "Oh God…was that what was wrong with you in Nessie's vision?" he nodded without a word and suddenly I felt so horrible. All that time that I had told him all about my relationship with Connor and I was causing him pain. I literally wanted to beat myself up for doing that to him. How could I have been so selfish? I felt sick over the pain I had caused him.

"I'm so sorry Seth. I'm so sorry that I caused you that kind of pain. I never believed in a million years that you would feel that way about me. It never even occurred to me that knowing about all of that would hurt you. I am so sorry. I'm so awful!"

His head snapped us I spoke, "No, no you're not. I'm glad you talked to me; it gave us a chance to get to know each other better. I would rather have heard you talk about him with me than to not have you talking to me at all. You have no idea how even just that little piece of you in my life has made it so much better."

"Really?"

"Absolutely."

"Same is true for me." I said with a small smile.

I couldn't bring myself to pull away from the little computer screen that held the face of my Seth. We stayed on talking all night long. After we got past the initial drama, we were finally able to fall back into a more normal rhythm. It was a little awkward at times and occasionally my imprinting worries would shimmer through my mind, but for the most part we talked like we did any other day…just with the added knowledge that we were both on the same page. We were falling in love, and even to spite all of my fears, it still felt wonderful.

_**

* * *

**_

_**Author's note: Of course as usual, I don't own Twilight and the Lyrics for the song belong to David Archuleta. I debated on using the lyrics since it does sort of border on cheesy, but the more I listened to the song, the more I was convinced that it belonged in this story. Thanks for hanging in there and please don't forget to keep reviewing.**_

**Update: I have posted a link the youtube music video for David A's song Crush on my profile for easy access to those who might not have heard it yet. Another note that may or many not be interesting to you all, while reading BD, I pictured Seth being alot like David A. in my mind. In my story I think of him as being a bit older and more mature, kind of more like Steven Strait in The Covenant...I know most of the Twilight fandom thought of him as Jacob Black before the movie came out, but his face was what I was picturing while writing this scene...he's definitely my idea of this story's incarnation of Seth. Enjoy!**


	34. Chapter 34

**34. Sleep Deprived Contentment**

Morning light began to stream through the glass wall of my bedroom. I was now lying on my bed on my stomach facing the computer with my elbows perched on a pillow still unable to take my eyes off of my Seth. We had spent the whole entire night unable to bear saying goodbye. We talked about everything we could possibly think of, both of us eager to soak up every piece of knowledge we could about one another. We gave each other video tours of our homes. Well, actually I just did my room as I was limited by my internet connection cables. Seth had a wireless network so he showed me his whole house and even his back yard and a few portions of the reservation that could be seen from his front porch.

We talked about our families and how they felt about 'us'. My family appeared to be ecstatic. They hadn't even bothered to come up and remind me to go to bed in the parental way that they had done when I was younger and didn't know my own physical limits. His family was a wee bit more skeptical.

Charlie and Sue were actually happy about it. Over the years they had grown to understand some of the complexities of the Cullen family as Charlie continued his relationship with Bella and Nessie. He'd grown to accept all the unusual aspects of his loved ones. I had actually met both Charlie and Sue a couple of years ago when they ventured east for a visit with the family. I really liked them both and they seemed to enjoy my company too. I assumed it was partially due to the fact that I was the only "normal" one around and it gave them a sense of comfort to be around me and to also see how comfortable I was in this highly unusual setting helped them to relax a little more. Leah, however, had never gotten over her distaste for my relatives and was instantly distrustful of me simply because of my upbringing. Seth tried to convince me that he was certain that she would change her mind once she got to know me, but I had heard enough stories to know that Leah's trust was not easily won.

I jumped as my alarm clock began to scream at us from across the room telling me that I now had no choice but to say goodbye and get ready for school. It was going to be a very long day, but it was SO worth it! We both begrudgingly bid one another farewell promising to sign back on as soon as I got home from school.

I got cleaned up and made my way downstairs to find that my entire family were milling around in the living room and dining room. They each took turns smiling at me brightly, each and every one with a knowing and approving sparkle in their topaz eyes. I walked into the kitchen to grab some breakfast as my mother walked over with a massive smile and giving me a long hug and kiss on the forehead whispering "I'm so happy for you dear" in my ear. I smiled back happily and began throwing together a quick meal of oatmeal and banana slices as I hummed happily to myself.

I could feel Jasper nearby and I looked up to see him smiling down at me. I smiled back feeling a little self-conscious and made my way to the dining room. Jasper followed a short while later and stood behind me a short distance away looking toward Alice with a wide smile. I sighed at this odd behavior and then turned back to my oatmeal. Jasper wasn't usually one to hover, so I really didn't know what to make of it. Edward walked in shortly after and stopped smiling widely at me as he read the confusion in my thoughts.

He laughed lightly, "You're so happy that he's finding it hard to pull himself away. You're like a good mood magnet, it's hard for him to resist enjoying the sensation with you."

I glanced back to Jasper again who was still smiling over at me and then shrugged turning back to my food.

"You guys had a nice LONG conversation. You think you'll be able to stay awake today at school?"

I smiled remembering how wonderful it was to spend the whole night looking into the eyes of my Seth as we talked all night long about anything and everything. "I'll survive." _It was SO WORTH IT!_ I repeated in my head again. Edward chuckled and turned to look at Bella with a smile.

I ate quickly and made my way to school. I sat all day long fighting the lead that was invading my eyelids making them harder and harder to keep open. I kept myself awake by replaying parts of our all-night long conversation. Connor figured out what probably happened as soon as he set eyes on me in Trig. He laughed and asked me all about it.

"Good for you Lina. At least one of us might actually get to be with the one we love anyway!" He said with that dark sadness filling his eyes again. I reached across the aisle and placed my hand on his arm in an attempt to comfort him. He smiled at me lightly and then looked toward the front of the class and seemed to get lost in his own thoughts for the rest of class.

By the time rehearsals were over I was barely able to hold myself vertical. Mrs. J was very upset at my lack of energy in rehearsal, constantly complaining about everything I was doing. Amy smiled at me smugly from across the stage, enjoying the deluge of ridicule being slung at me by the exasperated director. I was tired, but I wasn't letting the criticism bother me. I was still not regretting my choices from the night before.

I walked out to my car, the thought crossing my mind that it might not be a good idea for me to drive myself home. I was grateful to see that I wasn't the only one that thought of this; Jacob was leaning against the back fender of my car with a big smile on his face.

"Hey there!" I smiled up at him, the glint of joy reflecting out of his eyes registering in my consciousness.

"Hey there yourself!" he said pushing off the car and holding his hand out waiting for my keys.

"Thanks for driving me home. I'm so tired, I wasn't sure I'd be able to make it on my own."

"Yeah, I heard all about it this morning. You guys had quite a revealing night." His smile so bright it was practically glowing at me through the darkness.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, well Seth was so excited he still wasn't able to sleep when you guys finally logged off so he went for a nice wolf run and I happened to be phased when he took off. Man he's so happy; I couldn't even begin to tell you. He's always been a happy go lucky kind of guy, but jeez…the man was down right giddy!"

I smiled at him in my own cloud of giddy joy. I sighed and rested my head on the seat as we drove along looking lazily out the window at the dark trees flying past my field of vision. "Oh Jacob, I can't believe it's all real. I mean it's like a fairytale or something. I just keep thinking that any minute I'm going to wake up."

He reached over and patted my leg with his big hand as I turned to face him again. "It's real kiddo. Trust me, I felt it for myself. This is the real deal."

My worries invaded the back of my mind again. "Jake, I'm kind of worried though." He looked over at me and from the look on his face I knew he had probably already guessed what it was. For all I knew Seth was having the same fears and just not sharing them with me, but keeping them from Jake would be impossible. "In a way I'm glad that I'm not his imprint. It means a lot to me that he cares about me for who I am. I know that it's by choice, not by force…but well, I'm just scared that I'm going to really let him in and then he'll meet his real imprint and I'll be left broken hearted."

He shook his head in understanding. He had experienced Leah's pain first hand when she joined the pack and was dealing with the pain of losing Sam when he imprinted on Emily. "He's convinced that he never will imprint, that if he were going to that he would have on you the first time he saw your face…but it worries him too. I'm not the only one who felt Leah's pain…we all did. He doesn't ever want to hurt you, especially like that."

I sighed. I had figured he would probably be feeling that way. I guess there was nothing either of us could really do about it, and to spite my fears of being left broken hearted, I wasn't willing to risk the happiness I was feeling just knowing that he cared over something that may or may not ever actually happen. I made up my mind the first time he questioned whether or not he should have revealed the truth to me at all that he was worth the risk. The thought of not having him in my life was too difficult to bear. Suddenly I was no longer tired. All I could think about was how badly I wanted to get home and talk to Seth again.

As we drove up the driveway I asked Jacob if he could drop me off by the front door. As he stopped to let me out I thanked him and ran in the house and straight to my room to boot up my computer. As the hard drive spun to life I texted Seth that I was home and booting up and would soon be ready to talk. I should have taken some time to eat before calling him, but I didn't care. My need to see his face again was stronger than my desire for food.

A few seconds later I was once again face-to-face with my Seth. I smiled at that adorable face and blurted, "Wow did I miss you today!"

He smiled a wide warm smile back at me, "Tell me about it! This had to be the longest day of my life!"

We both laughed. A few minutes into the conversation there was a knock at my door. I yelled for whomever it was to come in. In walked Edward carrying a plate with a ham sandwich, chips, and a soda for me.

"You may be willing to ignore your need to eat in favor of talking to Seth all night, but I'm not. Here." He said, handing me the plate and flashing me a smile.

"Hey Edward!" Seth called cheerily from the computer screen.

"Hi Seth. Um, can you do us all a favor and not let her stay on all night again? We really don't want to do the whole parental thing and give you guys a curfew for this, but she can't keep going like she did today. Okay?"

Seth saluted Edward, "Sure thing buddy. I was planning on making her go to sleep before it gets too late tonight anyway. I definitely don't want her getting sick or anything."

I watched this exchange with my eyebrows furrowed. I was somewhere between annoyed at them talking about me like I'm some little kid who needs cared for and sort of touched by Seth's worries about my health. I decided to try to ignore it and not let it cloud what now promised to be my relatively short conversation with Seth. I took an eager bite of my sandwich and a long swig of my soda waiting for them to finish their conversation. After a few minutes of polite dialog Edward left us alone again to talk in relative privacy.

"So, how did you survive today?"

"In a state of half consciousness…but it was worth it." I said smiling.

"Yeah, it definitely was," he replied with a content look in his eyes.

"Did you ever get any sleep today? I know you didn't right away because when Jake picked me up from school he said you went for a run after we logged off and that you guys got a chance to catch up."

"Oh he did, did he?" Seth replied sounding a little concerned about what Jake might have shared. Obviously Jake knew a whole lot more than he let on with me. He frowned for just a second and then shrugged a little. "Nah, I was too buzzed this morning and then I got inspired again and did some tweaking to the site and then by the time the fatigue started to catch up to me I knew you'd be getting home soon, so I just stayed up."

I smiled, a slight thrill running up my spine.

"Did rehearsals go okay? Considering how dead I am, I'm guessing you probably had a hard time keeping up the energy by then."

"Yeah, it sucked. Mrs. J was on my case all night, much to Amy's delight." He frowned at the mention of Amy. I had told him enough about her in the past few weeks that he was quite aware of her animosity toward me. "I just can't believe that opening night is only two and a half more weeks away. It just seems like there is so much that has to be done in such a short amount of time. Every Saturday between now and then is going to be eaten up by set construction too, which really sucks. I'm starting to worry that we won't be able to pull it off in time."

The whole time I spoke he was listening to me so intently that I was beginning to worry that maybe he wasn't paying attention at all. _Maybe he fell asleep with his eyes open or something, _I thought to myself. But after I had finished he smiled at me and told me not to worry, I was going to do great.

We talked a bit longer and then appearing to have just as much difficulty as I did admitting to our need to sleep, he finally forced himself to log off. I quickly dressed for bed and was asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.

The alarm clock seemed to go off only minutes after I had drifted off into comforting sleep instead of the 7 hours that it had actually been. It wasn't enough. I was still completely exhausted, but I pulled myself out of bed anyway and got ready for the day. The next two weeks passed in pretty much the same way; a flurry of school days, rehearsal nights, and late night live web chats with Seth, followed by shorter nights that I would have liked, but put up with considering it better than the alternative. I was perpetually exhausted, but extremely happy.


	35. Chapter 35

**35. It's Showtime!**

Before I knew it, opening week was here. It was a horribly rough week. In addition to my regular schedule, rehearsals were longer and much more intense leaving no time to spend talking to Seth. We settled quite unhappily with texting every chance that we could possibly get. Seth wanted desperately to come and be here to see the play, but unfortunately Hollywood was calling and he had to be there for the entire week for some major meetings for three other projects that he was being considered for. Even though he hadn't had a chance to do any of the editorial work with a team yet due to his non-disclosure agreement, he was asked to show his progress on the big project he had been working on for the past month and a half and the executives were so thrilled that they asked him to meet with them about a few other projects in the works. As long as work didn't prove to be a problem, we had made tentative plans for him to come and visit us for Thanksgiving, giving us five whole days free from school and work obligations to spend together…in person…just the thought gave me chills and put a humongous smile on my face.

I sat in my attendance spot for P.E. staring into space with a big goofy grin on my face as my thoughts were once again focused on Seth. I was pulled from my daydreams by the sound of laughter. My friends were all standing around me as the rest of the class were beginning warm ups. The teacher had been repeating my name from behind me trying to get me to take notice and join the class, but I was so lost in my reverie that I didn't even hear him.

"Dang girl!" Leighton said bumping me with her hip as she jogged up next to me during laps. "I thought I was a lovesick puppy with Lucas. You make me look depressed in comparison with your ridiculously happy self!"

Leighton had long since forgiven me for breaking up with Connor after much smoothing over by her friend and seeing how good of a friendship Connor and I shared. At first she was upset when she had found out that I was now 'dating' Seth…well dating as much as two people who have never been in the same room, or state for that matter, can date.

Seth did his best to try to make some of our web chat nights as close to a date as he could manage, even coordinating with my family to make certain things happen. One night we had a cyber date with an Italian theme, where we both ate spaghetti together in candlelight. Another night I walked in to find that there was a 42-inch flat screen TV on the far side of the room with a DVD player cued up so we could watch Seth's favorite movie "together". I never ceased to be amazed at Seth's creativity.

"I know, I'm ridiculous," I finally responded having once again gotten lost in my own thoughts. "I can't wait for Thanksgiving. I really hope that all of this work stuff works out so that he can come. I'm going to go crazy if we have to wait even longer! It's going to be torture waiting the next four weeks as it is!" She laughed and jogged off leaving me with my daydreams again.

Tonight was our first dress rehearsal before our run through performance for the junior high kids tomorrow morning and then our opening night production that night. My nerves were electrified as I stepped out on the stage in my first costume of the performance. The rehearsal was a bit bumpy and I was praying that the old adage was true that a bad dress rehearsal meant an excellent opening weekend. If not then we were screwed.

I walked in the back door and collapsed in the dining room with my bags in hand. I was so exhausted, both physically and mentally, that I couldn't find the strength to drag all of my junk up to my room. My mother walked in smiling and took my bags from me and handed them to Rosalie, asking her to take them up to my room for me. I leaned forward resting my forehead on the cool wooden tabletop and sighed, my hair, which was now festooned with bright blonde highlights, fell over my shoulders and hung dangling below me. I still wasn't used to the sight of myself as a blonde, but to be honest, I kind of liked what it did for my complexion…it sort of softened my features. I had actually been considering keeping it this color even after the play is over.

"That tired huh?" I heard Bella ask as she floated in from the living room.

"Yeah" I managed to say without looking up and then finally raised my head to run my hands through my hair. "Dress rehearsal was a disaster. I certainly hope tomorrow goes better!"

She smiled over at me almost as if she already knew, "It'll be great Lina, trust me."

"Alice?" I asked already knowing from the absolute certainty in Bella's voice.

"Of course." She answered matter of factly.

I was about to get up and go try to find something to eat in the kitchen before going up to my bedroom to pass out when my mother appeared with a bowl of chicken noodle soup, a glass of orange juice, and a sandwich. I smiled at her appreciatively as she placed it in front of me on the table.

"I figured from the looks of you that some preventative measures might be good to stave off you making yourself sick."

"Thanks Mom" I said and then remained quiet as I quickly scarfed down the food in front of me, even more ravenous than I had realized.

Bella sat and kept me company as I ate, making polite small talk that didn't force me to answer, but was full of interesting tidbits I might like to hear about.

"Charlie called today," she added thoughtfully with a sly smile forming on one corner of her mouth. "Seems Sue is ecstatic over you and Seth. At first she was just happy for him, but maybe a little concerned, but after seeing the change in him he says that she's convinced you are the best thing since sliced bread. He said that even Leah has noticed and said that she's looking forward to meeting the girl that's making her brother so unbearably happy, even if she was raised by 'the bloodsuckers'." She chuckled a little as I gulped down the large spoonful of soup I had just placed in my mouth with a look of surprise on my face.

Leah was looking forward to meeting me? When exactly was I supposed to be meeting Leah? I was too tired to dwell over it too much though and finished my food with no more major surprises. As I slowly drudged upstairs my phone rang. I jumped immediately recognizing the ring tone and then with more energy than I had managed to muster all day long I hurriedly fished my phone out of my pocket to answer it before it would possibly have any chance of going to voicemail.

"Seth?"

"Hey beautiful! How you holding up?"

"Ugh…I'm so exhausted! Glad to hear your voice though."

"I miss you. This has been awful not being able to talk to you!"

"Yeah, tell me about it, and texting just doesn't do it for me anymore…ya know?"

"Yeah, calling is a far second too…I'd much rather be seeing your face right now and I'm dying to see the blonde hair!"

"I feel ya babe." I laughed at myself as I realized that I had begun to pick up some of Mrs. J's quirky sayings. Seth had caught it too and laughed a little on the other end of the line.

"So, how are things going? Am I lucky enough to hear your voice because you have some good news to share?"

"Hey! How did you know? Did Alice cheat?"

"You know Alice can't see you! I just know you is all." I said with a sly smile that I was really wishing he could actually see. "So?"

"So I got hired for one of the three and I'll know about the other two by the end of the week!"

"Oh Seth, I'm so proud of you honey! That's wonderful!" I yelled with more exuberance than I had experienced all week.

"It's going to be a lot of work, but I'm looking forward to the challenge. I'm counting on my muse for inspiration."

"Let's just hope you were right and I can strike gold more than once. I'd hate to let you down."

He laughed. "You could never let me down."

I stopped cheering for a second when a thought crossed my mind that made me lose my cheerfulness. "Wait! Will this keep you from being able to come see me over Thanksgiving?"

"Well, it shouldn't, that's the beauty of my work…I can do it anywhere that I can take my computer. The only possible problem would be if they want me to be there for meetings or something during that time. I'm guessing the big wigs take Thanksgiving off too, so I'm hoping that won't be the case."

"Oh, me too. Four weeks is long enough to wait. I don't want to have to wait even longer."

"I know sweetie. I feel the same way. Hopefully it won't be a problem."

I yawned involuntarily as my exhaustion regained control of my body and I plopped down on my bed with my phone still clinging to my ear. "I need to let you get to sleep babe. You sound completely exhausted."

"Oh, I am. I'm not sure I'll be trying out for the spring production. This has been far too grueling and it's taking time away from all of the things I'd much rather be doing." I said with a teasing tone. He chuckled knowing exactly what I meant.

"Okay, well sweet dreams beautiful."

"You too sweetie." I said in barely more than a whisper. The line went dead and I was so tired that I could barely keep my eyes open, but I wanted to do something nice for Seth, so I flipped open the camera lens of my phone and took a quick picture of myself with my hair fanned over my head on my pillow. I looked to make sure it looked halfway decent and was pleasantly surprised to find that it was one of the best ones I had ever taken…or maybe I just really liked the blonde that much more. I sent the picture to Seth's cell and within a half a minute I was asleep.

The next day I woke up to find Seth had texted a response back. All it said was "Wow!" I was hoping it was a good 'wow'. I took a second to text back asking that very question and then got ready for the day.

The rest of my morning was a blur of running errands and doing last minute adjustments to wardrobe and set before the junior high kids were to come to see our first run through before opening night. We had been excused from classes the whole day so we could dedicate all of our energy to the production, but to be honest I would have been grateful for a short break, even if it did mean listening to a lecture in Trig.

I did sneak off a time or two to text back and forth with Seth. He had said that it was definitely a good 'wow." He really loved the picture and had saved it as the picture ID that would show up on the screen of his phone when I would call him. I blushed when I read that and had a hard time figuring out what to say in response. He sent me one last text fifteen minutes before it started to wish me good luck.

The butterflies invading my chest during auditions were miniscule compared to the ones fighting for domination in the few minutes before the show was to begin. I peeked out through the side of the stage curtain into the sea of adolescent faces filling the auditorium seats. I shuddered as I remembered the disastrous dress rehearsal the night before. I sincerely hoped that the adage was true and that we would pull it off this time. Adolescent kids were notorious for being brutally honest and I was hoping I wouldn't be booed off stage. The stage lights came up and the play began. I took a deep breath and Seth's face popped in my mind. I smiled, rolled my neck back and forth while shaking out my hands to loosen up and then straightened my back. I stepped out on stage and was grateful when my mind let the character take over and suddenly I was no longer Lina.

One scene to the next, the production continued on without a hitch. Next thing I knew I was standing on the stage taking our final curtain calls to the roar of a thousand 6th, 7th, and 8th graders applause. I sighed a deep cleansing breath of relief, hoping that we could make it all happen this way again for the next three performances.

We were done with the performance and had everything set back up for tonight's performance by 1pm so we were allowed to go home for a few hours before having to return by 4 to get dressed and make final preparations for the night's performance. My family was shocked to see me walk in so early. I provided them with a brief explanation and description of our success this morning and then made my way up to my room to try to text Seth and rest before I had to be back up there to get ready for the 7pm opening night event. I set my alarm in case I happened to drift off and laid down on my bed. A few seconds later I got a text back from Seth that he was in a meeting, but was glad that things went well and wishing me the best of luck for tonight. I closed my phone as my eyes fluttered shut for a much-needed nap.

I awoke to the sound of my alarm beeping violently at me from it's home across the room on my dresser. I kept it over there on purpose, forcing myself to leave the comfort of my bed to shut if off, which served to keep me from mindlessly hitting snooze and letting time get away from me. I looked over shocked to find that it had been going off for ten minutes and I hadn't even heard it. I jumped up panicked that I would be late and dashed down the hallway and out to my car. The house was strangely empty. I had wondered why nobody had come to wake me hearing my alarm clock going off for so long without being shut off. I didn't have time to think about it. I rushed toward school, praying that there were no police stationed between home and the school parking lot. Thankfully my speed demon tendencies allowed me to get back to school just in time.

I tried to calm myself as I sat in the chair for the second time while the make up girls applied my new face and styled my hair once more. Just before curtain time I stole another peek at the audience. I was amazed at how much more nervous I was staring out at a crowd of adults than I had been staring at the junior high kids. Just as I began to start hyperventilating I caught sight of my brother Emmett at the very back of my sliver of vision provided by the gap in the curtain. He had his fingers in his ears making moose antlers at me from his seat while sticking his tongue out at me. I stared at him in disbelief for a second before I started laughing uncontrollably. Everyone around me looked at me as though I had just lost my mind. All of a sudden I was no longer nervous in the slightest. All I could think about was my hope that I could manage to purge the image of Emmett moose out of my mind before I had to step out on stage and be Sandy.

Thankfully just like the morning performance, I stepped into character as soon as I stepped into the stage lights and from there everything was automatic. It was a great opening night crowd. They laughed openly at the appropriate moments and cheered loudly when I made my final appearance on stage. I could hear my family's cheers above all the rest. The whole performance went off without a hitch and it was only during final curtain calls that I spied that Edward was standing in the back holding a handheld digital camcorder. He had recorded the whole thing. I was so glad I hadn't seen that before the curtain calls or else I probably would have been far more nervous than I was. After I bent down the second time with the group I looked up to see Jacob standing in front of the stage reaching up to hand me a bouquet of Sterling Roses and a bouquet of Calla Lilies and orchids…both were absolutely breathtaking. I smiled widely as I took them into my arms and blew a kiss to my family out in the crowd.

After the performance we were allowed to go out and greet our families in the commons area. I carried my flowers with me as I walked and looked down to notice that the bouquet of Callas and Orchids had a small card tucked in amongst the beautiful fragrant flowers.

_Congratulations beautiful! I'm sorry I couldn't be there, but Edward promised to upload the video as soon as he gets home so I can watch it tonight. They told me that they had the roses covered, so I got you these instead. They're my favorites, hope you like them. –Seth_

I smiled and inhaled the beautiful scent of the gorgeous exotic flowers deeply. That man had a knack for doing just the right thing to make me happy!

As I entered the commons area I spotted my family right away, but it took me a while to get them due to being stopped every few seconds by strangers who congratulated me on a great performance. I thanked them graciously, anxious to get over to my waiting family who were all gazing at me with pride. I finally reached them and was met with a sea of compliments and congratulations. They were all dressed to the nines and were getting peculiar stares from the rest of the play's patrons. I didn't care though, I was happy to be basking in the glow of my family's love. They passed me around the circle each giving me a squeeze and telling me how proud they were of me. Edward to my chagrin still had the camera rolling as I got to him I gave him a crooked smile. "You're not really going to send this to him too are you?"

"Of course I am!" he said cheerily. "I brought the Aston so I can get home as soon as possible and get it sent to him. Matter of fact I'm leaving right this second." He said turning to leave.

I grabbed at his arm, "Wait, I want to say something to him actually." He turned to me and smiled aiming the lens at me again. I stood there a second, suddenly aware that I had the attention of all of the others around us, friend and stranger alike. I shrugged, more excited to have a chance to thank Seth. "Hi Sweetie, thank you for the flowers," I said raising them in my arms slightly. "They were perfect. I miss you! Can't wait for Thanksgiving." Then I blew a kiss at the camera and winked theatrically.

Edward laughed and asked if that was it. I blushed and nodded and then he turned and disappeared out the front door at the fastest speed he could manage without bringing attention to himself.

I turned back to my family thanking them for the Roses and coming to see me and then asked them to take the flowers home for safe keeping before returning to the dressing rooms to change back into my street clothes before heading home.

My phone rang as I was driving home. It was Seth. Before I had a chance to even say hello he was already talking.

"Can I just say that you are so beautiful?"

I laughed not knowing how to respond. "I take it Edward has already managed to send you the video of the play?"

"Not the play, not yet, he sent me your little message from after the play first while the play itself is downloading. Did you know that you are incredibly sexy?"

My breath caught in my chest. We had never even gotten anywhere close to talking about anything to do with sex or sexy before, ever. If he could have seen the nearly purple hue that invaded my face he would have laughed hysterically I was sure. I sputtered in shock and he gave me a little chuckle.

"Well, I just wanted to tell you that because I just couldn't wait. By the way, did I tell you that I while I love your natural color, I really like this one too? It's very Summery."

I finally found my voice again now that the subject had moved to a safer subject. "Yeah, I like it too…I'm thinking I might keep it this way for a while."

"I wouldn't mind," he said teasingly. I could hear the smile in his voice. Then his tone changed. "Oh, the video of the play is coming down now. I'll call you when I'm done watching it." He paused for a second thinking twice, "Unless you think you might be asleep. Maybe I should text you instead?"

"No, I got a nap between the two performances an I'm pretty wired. I think I'll still be up."

"Alright. I'll call you as soon as I'm done…unless I can't wait that long!" he said excitedly. "Okay bye."

"Bye" I said still reeling from his earlier comments. I closed my phone and put both hands back on the wheel. My face was practically ablaze it was so hot from the deep blush invading it's coloring. I drove the rest of the way home in a state of semi shock.

I walked in the back door to find a party waiting for me. Alice had gone overboard as usual. The dining room was a tent of red and black streamers mixed with bouquets of helium balloons. A huge sheet cake sat in the middle of the table that read "Congratulations Lina! You were fabulous!"

We sat around for the next two hours laughing and talking as Nessie, Jake and I ate the cake. I had really missed spending time with my family. I looked around the room absorbing the scene of my family all enjoying themselves together in contentment. I was so lucky to have such a sweet and loving family.

Finally, my cell phone rang and I answered it as I headed upstairs waving to my family and blowing them kisses as I went.

"Wow Lina, you were incredible! I'm so proud of you!" Seth said his voice full of enthusiasm and pride.

I blushed as I thanked him.

"I'm serious, you were amazing. I couldn't take my eyes off of you!"

We talked a while longer as he continued to praise me far more than I deserved. It was with great frustration that we finally ended the conversation, but it was already after midnight and I needed to get my rest if I were going to make it through another performance tomorrow night. I closed my phone and got cleaned up for bed and as I lay down and closed my eyes I heard my phone's text alert ring. I opened it to see Seth's face smiling at me. He had taken a picture of himself next to a paper that he had printed out that he had made. It was a star that resembled those found on the walk of fame with my name on it. I laughed and texted back that he was crazy and thanked him again and then drifted off to sleep with a smile on my face. Seth's smile filled my mind as I drifted out of consciousness.


	36. Chapter 36

**36. Just Another Part of the Human Condition**

The next two days performances went just as well as the first. My family divided their ranks half attending each of the performances to ensure that I had support every time. I went out with my friends after the Sunday afternoon performance for a celebratory dinner. It was such a relief to have it all behind me. For the first time in six weeks I felt free and relaxed and excited for all of the free time I would have now to spend with my family and talking to Seth. There were a few more play related obligations. Everyone involved was required to attend a mandatory wrap meeting Monday evening and help tear down the set after school Tuesday and Wednesday. After that we would finally be totally free.

Another week passed and it was now the first week of November and the air was beginning to get a bit chillier every day. At school all anyone could talk about was the fun they had over the weekend for Halloween. They had gone to a really awesome haunted house in a neighboring town and some were even crazy enough to go on some midnight graveyard tours. I never really got into Halloween. Why would I when half of the creatures portrayed on this holiday were a part of my life on a daily basis and were not very like their stereotypes? The only thing I liked about that week was that it had meant that I only had three weeks left to wait for Seth to come visit instead of four. I couldn't wait and now we were down to two weeks!

Seth had been so excited to be awarded two of the three projects that he went to Hollywood to vie for. He was really starting to make a name for himself in some pretty important circles and it also meant a much larger paycheck for each project as well he should. The second it hit midnight on November first I was sitting in front of my computer checking out his big project to which I had supposedly inspired and it was amazing. I had never seen such amazing and imaginative transitions between screens. The man was incredibly gifted. Unfortunately these two new projects were even more involved than the last and he had to work so hard to get everything done before Thanksgiving that we didn't get much time to talk. On the plus side, he had negotiated approval for me to consult with him on the projects, so after I signed a non-disclosure agreement too, I was able to see what he was doing and provide input as he progressed. We made a good team, but most of our time talking together was work related due to the rushed deadlines, which was hard. I kept trying to remind myself that it would all be worth when I get to have him all to myself when he makes the trip in two short weeks.

Things were on a roll and I was in a good mood most of the time, constantly looking forward to Seth's impending arrival. I went about the business of being a teenager in the meantime, focusing on school and doing my best to keep engaging in a social life with my friends. It was bound to happen sooner or later though; things never go smoothly for long.

It was a Monday and I hadn't been feeling quite myself all day long. I was tired and felt kind of warm. I walked into the house dropping my book bag by the back door. I didn't have the energy to haul it all the way upstairs. My mother was the first one to run into me as I made my way through the kitchen on my way to the stairs leading to my bedroom.

"Oh Goodness. Angelina dear, are you feeling alright?"

I must have looked worse than I had thought. "I'm not feeling quite right Mom, I think I'm going to go up and just lay down for a while."

She placed her hand on my forehead. Her cool touch felt wonderful against my clammy skin. A panicked look passed over her face as she calculated my body temperature with only the accuracy a vampire could manage by a mere touch. "Lina! Your temperature is hovering around 102! You go lay down, I'm calling your father."

She was already over reacting. Anytime I got sick my whole family went into panic mode. I always hated how all life stopped in the Cullen household when I got the slightest bug. I guess it was to be expected, the only other human type people in their lives were a werewolf and a vampire hybrid, both of which never got sick. I on the other hand was a full-blooded run of the mill human who tended to catch every major bug to ever make its way into my path. I groaned in anticipation of the hovering which was sure to ensue immediately and weakly pulled myself up the stairs to my room.

No sooner than my feet touched the hardwood flooring of my room than Bella was standing behind me offering to go get me something to eat or drink. I politely refused kicking off my shoes and letting myself fall onto my bed. The next hour was an endless procession of concerned family members who took turns sitting on my bed using their own bodies as cold compresses to fight off the rising fever and offering to bring me anything I needed. After a while I realized that the rest I desired probably wasn't going to come anytime soon and I had left my cell phone in my book bag still sitting by the back door. At the next vampire compress shift change, I asked Rose to go get me my one link to a saner outside world. I asked for a few minutes of privacy…at least I could pretend I had some privacy while alone in the room.

My first task after getting my phone was to text my friends telling them that I had a fever and didn't know if I would make it to school tomorrow or not. The second and more important text was to Seth. More than anything, I knew that hearing his voice would help me feel better, but I didn't want to call because I was pretty sure I remembered him mentioning he had a big meeting today. It took less than 30 seconds for my phone to ring after sending the message and I smiled knowing it was my Seth.

"Hello?" I croaked. I sounded worse than I had realized.

"Hey honey, are you okay?" His voice sounded very concerned.

"Pretty much, I just have a fever and I'm pretty weak. If feeling like a semi has just hit you is okay then I'm right as rain." I tried to joke.

"Are you achy? Do you feel nauseas?"

"Achy yes, nauseas, not so much."

"Has your father checked you out yet?"

"No, but mom's first instinct was to call him. I'm sure he'll be here as soon as he can get away from the hospital. Thankfully he's the ONE person around here who doesn't freak out when I get sick. He knows that it's part of the human condition."

"Well, just do me a favor okay? Can you please call me and let me know what he says after he checks you out? Or if you're not up to talking then you can just have him call me directly."

"I'm never too sick to talk to you." I sighed weakly with a smile spreading across my face to spite feeling like death walking.

I could almost hear the warm smile that I knew had spread across his face. I had seen it many times during our web chats. Thank God for web cams and the internet!

"You know I really don't want to go, but I'm in Vancouver right now for that business meeting and I really need to get back in there."

"You left a major meeting to check on me?" I couldn't help but laugh. "You're as bad as THEY are…maybe worse!"

"I was worried. You get to feeling better and I'll call again as soon as I can. Don't forget to let me know what Carlisle says, okay?"

"I promise…good luck in there."

"Thanks"

I closed the phone with a sigh. It really did make me feel better to hear his voice. The _only_ thing that would make our phone conversations better would be if they were private. Everyone in the house could always hear my side of the conversation no matter how quietly I whispered and Edward could hear both sides thanks to his abilities. I'll probably never get over the embarrassment of knowing that he can hear every ooey gooey thought that passes through my mind when I'm on the phone with Seth. Poor Edward.

I closed my eyes and thought of Seth. The next thing I knew I was waking up to find my father sitting on the edge of the bed with his hand on my forehead. I glanced over at the clock; I had been asleep for 3 hours. I was shivering and my bed was completely soaked with sweat.

"Her temperature is up to 103.6. Emmett and Rose, go and fill the bathtub with cold water and ice, Esme, bring some ice water right away, she needs hydration to replace what she's lost. Alice, what do you see?"

"We need to move out of her way…now!"

At that instant I felt a lead ball tighten in my stomach right under my sternum. I jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet. My throat burned as the contents of my stomach came back to haunt me. It never seemed to end, my body heaving with every new spasm from the ball in the core of my body. Finally after what seemed like an eternity the heaving stopped and I grabbed some toilet paper to wipe my face and laid down on the cool tile exhausted.

I looked up to see Edward looking like he'd seen a ghost. I knew exactly why he looked so frightened. Just over a hundred years ago he and his family were victims of the Spanish Influenza epidemic which claimed the lives of both of his parents and was about to claim his own. At the pleas of Edward's mother for my father to save him no matter what it took, Dad chose to transform him, making him his first companion.

I looked into his panicked eyes and attempted to calm him, "Edward" all I could manage was a whisper. "It's going to be okay. I'll be fine. It's not the same as it was back then. Please calm down…please."

It wasn't helping so I decided to try to distract him with a task. "Water" I croaked, "I need to rinse my mouth."

He walked mechanically to the sink and filled the glass on the ledge with water and then gingerly bent down and helped me sit up to take a sip. I swished and spit into the toilet and then took another sip. The water traveling down my throat felt like it was full of razor blades.

Edward sucked in air in a low hiss, obviously so focused on my thoughts that he practically felt the pain himself. Sensing my thoughts he stood back up going over to the medicine cabinet and returned with a bottle of throat spray. I held my mouth open as he sprayed the soothing mist into my mouth. Immediately the sting in the back of my throat mellowed to a dull tickle.

Not wanting to talk out loud I locked gazes with him sending him a telepathic _Thank you._ He nodded and then looked up at the doorway stepping out of the way and out into the hall so that my sisters and mother could come in and take over. I could hear a murmured conversation between my father, Bella and Edward, but I was too weak to concentrate hard enough to hear what they were saying. I couldn't see them, but I was pretty sure that Bella was hugging Edward in an effort to comfort him.

Rose and Alice were very careful as they undressed me down to my undergarments and lowered me into the bath. The water was so cold…too cold. I screamed as the cold shot into my muscles with the feeling of a thousand knives stabbing me all at once. My sisters grimaced and let out a low sympathetic hiss in reaction to my scream. They didn't like this any better than I did. It seemed as cruel to them as it did to me, but it was a necessity. If the ice did its job, it would bring my core temperature back down to a safer level. After a few seconds the stinging slowly faded and was replaced by a strange numbness as I began to shiver. I could almost feel the heat radiate away from my body into the icy water surrounding me.

It was then that I remembered my promise to Seth. "Sssssss" I tried to speak but the words wouldn't come out. I switched tactics mentally screaming for Edward to listen. _EDWARD! Someone needs to call Seth, he's worried and I promised._

"Don't worry about Seth, Lina. We've been talking on and off for the last couple of hours. You slept through his first two calls and he called again just a few minutes ago. Now rest." He replied through the door that he had cracked open in order to respond. He must have known that I wasn't hearing as well as usual.

_Can I talk to him? Well…I guess I'm not really able to talk so much right now, but can you bring me a phone so I can hear him? I want to hear his voice._

I heard him mumble outside the door…I assumed he was contemplating with my father. After a few moments he called back, "Later Lina, let's get past this part first. Soon though, we promise. I'll tell him you want to talk to him though, that will make him feel better."

I sat in the cold water missing the sound of the one voice that I desperately wanted to hear. I closed my eyes picturing his warm smile and kind twinkling eyes. I could feel a small smile play across the corner of my lips as I slowly drifted into darkness, all I could see was the face of my Seth.

I could feel a hand that felt warm to the touch. My eyes snapped open in panic knowing that the only individuals in our family with a warm touch were not in town as my body jumped in reflexive defense. To my shock I found my father sitting on the edge of the tub holding my wrist in his hand.

"It's okay Lina, it's just me." He spoke soothingly to me as he continued to examine me.

I still couldn't seem to make my voice audible, but Edward quickly stepped in to interpret for me from behind the door. "She's surprised by how warm you feel to her."

"He feels warm to her? What does that mean?" My heart slowed at the relief of hearing Seth's voice on the speaker phone.

"She's happy to hear your voice Seth." Edward chimed in on my behalf. I sent him a telepathic thank you for letting Seth know that.

My father answered his question half a beat later. "Her skin is currently much colder than the room temperature that our skin is at the moment due to the ice bath, so I feel warm to her. But she had to stay in until her core temperature dropped enough to be safe. I think she's out of the woods fever wise now. I'm going to leave you girls to help her get out of there and get dressed. Let me know when you're done an I'll come back up."

He bent down to kiss me on the cheek and then made his way out of the room leaving me alone with my female family members. My mother was still holding the phone with Seth on speakerphone. Edward once again stepped in on my behalf, "Seth, she wants to call you back once she's settled. I'll take the phone for now though." He said to my mother reaching in through the door to take it from her.

I could still faintly hear their conversation in the hall….

"Why are you interpreting Edward? Is she really okay?"

"She's having a hard time talking right now between the cold making her shiver and her throat being sore from the vomiting. It's just easier on her, but I think she'll be able to talk again once we get her settled. Don't worry my friend, I think the worst is past us."

If there was more to the conversation, I didn't get to hear it. I was busy letting my sisters and mother help me get out of the tub and over to the toilet where they made me sit while they dried my body and hair. They helped me dress in dry clothes and combed and dried my hair for me before leading me back to my bed now fitted with fresh linens.

I smiled weakly up to them managing a rough "Thank You."

They all smiled back and quietly, my mom gently tucking the covers in around me and then they all exited the room with promises of chicken noodle soup and milkshakes to soothe my throat. I looked over at my clock that read 7:30 pm. I had been in that icy tub for nearly an hour. I tried to stay awake to talk to Seth again as Edward had promised, but my eyelids refused to cooperate as I drifted unwillingly back to sleep.


	37. Chapter 37

**37. The Gift**

I slept more peacefully this time. When I opened my eyes again it was daylight. I looked at the clock, which read 9am. I had slept all night long. I sat up looking around, grateful that the lead ball that had inhabited my chest cavity the night before seemed to have vanished along with most of my aches. I looked over to find Edward sitting up in the rocker on the far side of the room, apparently on Lina duty.

"Hi." I said, my voice still weaker than usual, but not as scratchy or as painful as it had been the night before.

"Hi there," he responded from his spot across the room. His face looked calmer than it had last night. "You seem to be feeling better." He continued more out of good manners than the need for an answer…he had heard my mental self-evaluation when I had first sat up.

"I feel much, much better." I said with the first genuine smile I had been able to produce since coming home.

"Well, you're still needing to keep resting today just to be sure. We already called you in sick to school." He stated and then added with a twinkle in his eyes, "Oh and Seth is anxiously awaiting your call."

"But it's so early, I don't want to wake him.."

"Yeah, like he actually got a wink of sleep last night! He was so worried about you and called pretty much every hour on the hour all night long for updates."

I looked down studying my sheets for a moment. I felt bad that I had worried him so much. I wanted to call him right away and help relieve his fears. Hearing my desire and my wish to speak to him alone, Edward nodded and got up leaving my phone next to me on the bed.

I picked up the phone and dialed. My poor Seth's voice sounded so tense when he answered. I could tell he was afraid that there was more bad news.

"Hi there worrywart." I joked with my still somewhat gravely voice.

I heard a sigh of relief from the other end of the line. "Oh, it's so good to hear your voice. I was so worried about you! How are you feeling?"

I closed my eyes, listening to that sweet warm voice. I sighed in contentment before responding. "I actually just woke up a couple of minutes ago. I'm feeling so much better."

"Good!" he replied sounding suddenly very exhausted.

"I was worried about calling so early, but Edward said that you didn't get to sleep all night long. I really wish you hadn't been so concerned. You really need to go lay down and get some rest honey. I'm fine, I promise. I feel a little bit weak still, but other than that I feel fine."

"I'd rather talk to you."

"I'd rather talk to you too…I'm so glad to hear your voice, but I'd feel a lot better if you got some rest first. I don't want you getting sick too."

"Ugh…I wish I were there. I want to hug you so bad. I'd feel so much better if I could see for myself that you're better."

"I know, I wish that too, but you can't. You have things that you have to do over there. You're coming to see me in just a little less than two weeks. We've waited this long, we can survive just that much longer."

He sighed again, "I guess. I don't like it, but I guess I'll survive."

"Alright, now I order you to go to your bed right now."

"Ooookay…I'm here."

"Okay, now lay down and grab a pillow and cuddle up to it imagining it's me and I'll do the same here."

He sighed into the phone, "I wish it really was you."

"I know, I do too. Now, promise me that you will get some sleep. You can call me as soon as you wake up."

"I think I can manage that."

"Okay, talk to you later."

He yawned loudly into the phone and then I thought I heard him whisper "I love you" as the line disconnected, but I wasn't sure. I laid there, my heart pounding as I tried to remember exactly what I heard. He's never said it to me before, even though he had implied it on more than one occasion, he'd never actually come out and SAID it! Was I imagining it or did he really say it? My chest tightened with excitement. I was pretty sure I heard him say it. I was almost positive. Oh man…this was going to be a long day waiting for him to wake up and call me back…there was no way I was going to get any more sleep now!!!! I hugged the pillow in my arms closer to my chest with a deep sigh.

When I had hung up the phone, I was certain I wouldn't be able to get back to sleep, but as I lay there snuggled up to my Seth substitute, the weakness of my body finally took over drawing me back into my dream world. Here I really was in Seth's arms and in my dream I kept hearing him whisper "I love you" over and over again. When I began to re emerge from my dream world, I found I was once again not alone. This time Jake was sitting sentinel at my bedside.

"Jake…what are you doing here? You guys weren't supposed to be back from New York for a couple more days!"

"We heard you were sick and came back home to make sure you were okay."

"Ugh…so my stupid flu ruined your trip? I'm human guys…humans get sick. It's not worth ruining your trip over."

"A. You didn't ruin our trip. We were already bored and ready to come home anyway. B. We go on vacation all of the time, so to miss a couple of days of yet another trip is no big deal. C. You are more important than any vacation anyway. And finally D. You didn't just have a little cold. You were in really bad shape. There was no way in hell we were going to stay in New York knowing what was going on."

I rolled my eyes. "You guys are all insane, you know that?!"

"Oh just realize you're important and get over it!"

I laughed as I tossed my hands up in defeat. I was surprised when they landed on a box sitting next to me on the bed.

"What's this?"

"Overnight express and post marked from La Push…I'm guessing it's from Seth." A thrill ran up my spine.

"Will you open it for me please?"

Jacob effortlessly peeled open the box handing me a folded note that was on top of the assortment of items in the box.

_My Sweet Angelina,_

_I wanted to send you a few things to help you feel better and think of me. I have included my favorite blanket that my mom made for me when I was younger. I'm hoping you will wrap yourself in it and pretend that my arms around you keeping you warm. I've also sent you some Clearwater family recipe soup mix guaranteed to fix whatever ails you as well as some homeopathic herbal bath salts, so when you finally get a warm bath, they can help you relax and feel better hopefully. The can of your favorite soda is to help settle your poor stomach. And finally the teddy bear's name is Seth and he's yet another substitute for my hugs._

_I know it's not much, but I wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you and I would give anything to be there with you. If I didn't have a mandatory and unmovable meeting Wednesday morning I would be on a plane making my way across the country to your side as we speak instead of making this silly care package. I know I should save this until I we are face to face, but today I was so scared that I was going to lose you before I could ever have a chance to tell you that I knew I had to tell you now…I know we haven't seen each other in person, haven't touched or kissed, but it doesn't matter because my heart already belongs to you. Please take care of it for me and get well soon. I can't wait to see you in the flesh and show you the full depths of my feelings for you, but for now please just believe me when I say that I love you with all of my heart._

_Yours Always, __Seth_

Tears streamed down my face as I read the beautiful letter from Seth over and over again. I did hear him correctly…he really did say it and even more than that, he actually WROTE it down on paper. Tangible proof lay in my hands that he really did feel the same way for me as I did him! My heart sang for joy in my chest as I read the last line again and again.

Jacob was staring helplessly at me with a concerned expression on his face watching my tears fall. He seemed confused that I as smiling as the tears rolled down my face in torrents. I couldn't find the words to explain so I handed him the note gingerly and began to pull out the treasures hidden inside the box.

On top was the red velour blanket with a red satin trim. I pulled it out gingerly and brought it to my face taking in a deep breath. It smelled so amazing…my Seth smelled so amazing. I wrapped it around my shoulders and then continued through the contents of the box. I sat the soup mix, bath salts, and can of soda on my bedside dresser and then pulled out my teddy bear Seth and hugged him to my chest with a sigh. To the outsider it would seem like a box full of random gifts from a guy, but for me it was the single most romantic gesture in the world. I grabbed the end of the blanket draping it back across my face and breathed in Seth's warming scent smiling and melting back onto the bed.

I opened my eyes, suddenly remembering that Jacob was in the room with me. I looked over to see him looking at me with a huge goofy grin. He handed the note back to me, which I took and clutched to my chest sighing.

He laughed again handing me my phone from off the bedside table. "I assume you're going to be wanting to use this now."

"Yes please." I said with a contented smile. Recognizing his cue, Jake got up and walked out of the room to provide me my perceived privacy once more.

I started to dial and then froze remembering Seth's sleepless night and promise to call when he woke up. I desperately needed to hear his voice and tell him how much I loved his package and most of all him, but I also didn't want to interrupt his desperately needed sleep. I compromised and sent him a text message instead:

_I got your care package. I love it! Please call me as soon as you wake up. – Lina_

I resisted the urge to add "I love you too" but I didn't want to tell him that in a text. I would tell him exactly how I felt when he woke up and called back. Less than a minute later my phone rang.

"Hi sweetest man in the world."

"So, you really liked it?" He sounded nervous.

"It was without a doubt the single most romantic thing I have ever heard of in my life. I love it. You smell amazing by the way!"

He sounded better, but still nervous. "I'm glad you liked it." He paused for a moment like the was afraid to ask then he finally added… "Did you find the note?"

My heart started to flutter. "Yes, I did. Did you really mean it?"

"Absolutely." It sounded like he drew a breath as he said it like he was afraid to hear what my response was going to be.

"You don't know how happy it makes me to hear you say that. You see, the thing is…I love you too." I heard the breath escape in a sigh of relief.

"One week and five and a half more days...feels like an eternity." Seth whispered from his bed on the west coast

"Definitely." I whispered back. "Most definitely."


	38. Chapter 38

**38. Whatever Happened to Sensible Lina?**

To spite the fact that we were both completely exhausted, Seth and I talked for a couple of hours before reluctantly hanging up and going back to bed. We played with the idea of setting up the webcams, but I didn't really want him to see me still looking so pale and weak knowing it would only make him worry again. I slept through the night cuddled up to a pillow that I had wrapped Seth's blanket around pretending I was cuddled up to his chest and inhaling his intoxicating scent. I couldn't really describe the smell exactly, it was warm and comforting with the slightest hint of a woodsy smell that intermingled with his preferred cologne which I had found out during our conversation was called Hugo. All night long I kept waking up and turning my face into the plush blanket and inhaling deeply sending tingles of exhilaration through my body. If cuddling a blanket that smelled like him was this amazing, I couldn't imagine what hugging him in person would do to me.

Wednesday morning arrived with a whisper as I lay in bed once again taking time to imagine that I was in the arms of my Seth as the pink and purple hues of dawn crept across my room. I knew I had to go back to school, but all I really wanted to do was lay in bed all day again talking to Seth and pretending that he were here with me. I decided to compromise and made plans to transfer all of my books for school into my larger duffle bag so that I could smuggle my teddy Seth to school to sneak whiffs between classes. He smelled like Seth too, although not nearly as much as the blanket did.

I walked downstairs to find breakfast waiting for me. My family appeared to be genuinely relieved that I was back to my normal self. I could tell that my illness had frightened them more thoroughly than I had ever seen before. We all teased and joked as usual as they sat with me while I ate.

I made my way to school, stowing teddy Seth as covertly as possible in my locker. I knew that if any of the guys saw it I would never live it down. The day at school was overwhelming as I dealt with playing catch up. Leave it to me to get sick on the most intensive day of class to date. I was pleased to find that teddy Seth was fragrant enough to fill my whole locker with his comforting scent making it a whole lot less awkward to get my Seth fix that way rather than trying to sneak sniffs of the actual bear. I knew I was being ridiculous about the whole thing, but I couldn't help it. Love does strange things to even the most sensible people.

By the end of the day I was glad that I had brought the big duffel bag to school since I ended up having to bring every single book and notebook home to get all of my make up work in addition to current day's assignments done. Even though we were no longer dating, Connor still managed to be a very chivalrous friend offering to carry the ridiculously heavy bag to my car for me. As we walked I confided in him all of the amazing things that had happened over the last 48 hours. He was genuinely happy for me.

As we walked I started laughing as a realization hit me.

"What's so funny?" Connor asked looking confused as we exited the doors of the school and were making our way out to the parking lot.

I chuckled again and sighed. "I was just thinking about how things have turned out."

"How's that?"

"Two months ago I started school here having never had a boyfriend or a social life to speak of. In the first few weeks I managed to find a boyfriend and a best friend and now two months later my best friend is my boyfriend and my boyfriend is my best friend!" I laughed again and he joined me.

"Man, you give teenage primetime soaps a run for their money don't you?" He teased.

I almost said it out loud, but managed to stop just in time as I thought, _If you only knew how true that was! _Instead I just giggled again shaking my head in agreement as I unlocked my car and stepped aside to allow Connor to toss my duffel in the passenger seat for me. We said our goodbyes and he told me once more how happy he was for me and how glad he was that we were still friends.

When I got home Alice was waiting to help me with my bag. I assumed she had seen a vision of me struggling to get it inside and so she decided to help me out. It looked pretty comical since the bag was about one third of her total size, but with her exceptional vampire strength she was able to carry it as though it were nothing. She took it to the dining room and sat it on the table so I had a nice big work space and then danced off to join Jasper in the next room. Before I knew it the whole family came sauntering through the room to the back door informing me that they were going hunting to give me peace and quiet to work in and left. Only Edward stayed behind to help me figure out the complicated Trig assignment and Bella was situated in the living room in a sea of her own research for a big term paper due next week.

It took all night, but I finally got all of my work done with the assistance of Edward our resident master tutor. I called Seth for a short chat before bed and then passed out with exhaustion.

Thursday I woke up to find that Edward had placed my book bag in the car already so I didn't have to drag it out myself. I went to school, dragging the ridiculously heavy book bag on my own for the first time. I made a mental note that I needed to look into getting a bag with rollers next time I went shopping. My teachers were all pleasantly surprised to see that I had managed to make all of my work up in the one night. The day went much faster when I wasn't starting at a disadvantage.

Things were a bit weird during my conversation with Seth that night. He seemed distracted. I tried to chalk it up to stress over the deadlines for his projects, but a part of me couldn't help but worry that something else was wrong. As he rushed to get off the phone with a flimsy explanation I found myself hoping that we hadn't messed everything up between us by crossing the line from friendship to something more. It was so typically me to always worry waiting for the next shoe to drop. Things were going so great with Seth and I was scared that something would change all of that. I shook my head trying to let go of my worries. Seth being distracted with work didn't automatically mean that there was a problem. He was working really hard so he could focus on me when he came I reminded myself.

I woke up Friday morning relieved that it was the end of the week. One week and two days left until Seth's arrival, my irrational fears disappearing during the night. I was so excited I could hardly stand it.


	39. Chapter 39

**39. My Magic Moment**

I wasn't even in the room the day that my life changed forever. It was a regular run of the mill Friday. I had been so excited when I woke up looking forward to Seth's arrival in a little over a week. I had gotten dressed, gone to school, joked with my friends during lunch, took a Trig test in the morning and an Anatomy test in the afternoon, beat Riley in a heated game of badminton in P.E., and taken a minute to send a text message to Seth to brag about my victory before strolling out to my car after school to go home all the while utterly oblivious of what was to come.

I guess I should have suspected something was up when Alice was sitting on the hood of my car when I came out, but she did tend to hijack me for an impromptu shopping trip or day at the salon on occasion, so it didn't really strike me as all that strange that she was dragging me to Jake and Nessie's house to try on something she, Rose and Nessie had apparently picked out for me that morning while shopping in the city. I had given Alice a mission to find me the perfect outfit for the day Seth would come to visit and she believed that she had found it. First of course they demanded that I shower before deigning to slide into anything designer. Then they insisted I couldn't see myself until my hair was dry and styled to get the full effect and I had to have at least the bare minimum of makeup on. Thankfully they didn't go overboard as they typically tended to do when using me as a dress up doll, they did it my way…light and understated.

To my surprise, I was very pleased with the result as I looked into the mirror when they were done. Normally I would be gazing back at a vision of someone who looked completely different from me, but today it was a totally unique ensemble and I adored it. I smiled in the mirror as I admired the way that the dark green peasant blouse draped my frame. It had long floral embroidered crepe sleeves and a dark green crushed velvet lined lace up front bodice with a vine and leaf embroidery embellishing either side of the lacing and a very feminine ruffle at the bottom of the bodice and sleeves. I had never seen anything like it. This was matched with black jeans and a pair of black leather calf high low heeled boots. To finish the effect my sisters slid a silver choker with a single jade heart hanging from the middle around my neck. I almost looked like I stepped out of the pages of a Victorian romance novel…well if they were allowed to wear jeans in the Victorian era at least.

After taking a few minutes to absorb my reflection, I turned to my sisters with a wide smile on my face. "Perfect…it's perfect! It's so unique…I adore it. Thank you!"

They all smiled, proud of themselves for managing to make us all happy with the final result. Typically either I would be complaining their choices were too overboard or they would complain that my choices were too understated, but just this once we were all in agreement.

"So, do you think he will like it?"

I caught the knowing glace that passed between them, but then again I didn't usually take too much stock in those glances these days because my sisters were perpetually plotting. What else are they supposed to do with their time?

Finally Alice piped up, "He'll love it. Well, this was fun but I really need to be getting back home. Jasper and I are supposed to go hunting later tonight and he's waiting on me." She jumped up and ran out the back door to run the mile's journey back to our house.

"Yeah, me too," Rose added, picking up her car keys and heading for the door. "Emmett's probably wondering where I got off to. We were going to go into the city tonight to go dancing."

"Hey Rose, can I hitch a ride?" Nessie asked quickly. "I think Jake's over at the main house."

Suddenly I was standing alone in Nessie and Jake's house feeling just a tad bit bewildered. I frowned for a second trying to figure out exactly what they were up to. I knew my sisters well enough to know that they were manipulating events for some reason, but I still had no clue what on Earth was going on. I took my time grabbing my dirty clothes off the floor of the bathroom and stuffed them into my book bag, picked up the sneakers I had been wearing tying the laces together so I could throw them over my arm and walked out to my car. I climbed in and made the short trip home.

I pulled up in front of the house, not bothering to park my car in the garage since Jake's car was blocking my space and stepped out grabbing my book bag from the front seat. I stopped and placed the book bag on the trunk lid of my car and leaned back down to rummage through the passenger floorboard to find the book that had fallen out on the drive home. I stood back up placing the book back in my bag, threw it over my shoulder, and began to make my way up the walkway to the front door looking down at my new boots. I finally became aware of my surroundings and looked up freezing in my tracks…

"Seth?"

He just stood there staring at me and I just stood there staring back. I couldn't believe he was standing there. I didn't know for a second what to do and then before I made the conscious decision to do anything I dropped my book bag and ran up to him throwing my arms around his neck. He was a lot taller than I had anticipated forcing me to stand on my toes in order to actually reach around his neck and he seemed a lot more physically mature in person. He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in tightly burying his face in my hair. We stood there holding each other for the longest time. It felt so safe and warm in his arms, but the warmth I felt wasn't coming from his radiating body heat, but rather from deep inside myself. I felt like my insides were melting into a warm gooey ooze of contentment. I took a deep breath inhaling the comforting smell of his natural scent mixed with his Hugo cologne. He smelled and felt like home and I was so happy in that moment that I felt like I could cry.

The rest of the world seemed to cease existing, well that was until one of my family members on the porch behind us cleared their throats to let us know that they were there. They must have filtered out during our hug…or maybe they had been there the whole time and I just hadn't noticed. I flashed them a quick smile and then returned my gaze to Seth who still had his arms wrapped around my waist unable to take his eyes away from my face. He had such a serious and deep look in his eyes that made me a little nervous. Was he feeling strange about being with me in person? I unhooked my hands from around his neck lowering myself back to my heels, moving my hands so that they rested on his solid biceps. I felt the need to keep touching him.

Finally I broke the silence, "Wow! This is such a surprise. I didn't think you were coming for another week!"

A smile finally broke across his face, "It was Jake and Edward's idea for me to fly in early. They knew that I was really worried when you had been sick and that we were really dying to see each other, so they invited me to come early thinking it would be fun to surprise you. That why I rushed off the phone last night, I had to hurry or I was going to miss my flight."

I looked up to where Jake and Edward stood and told them thank you. That's when I realized that everybody on the porch was looking at me strangely too. It was sort of this strange look that floated somewhere between happiness and anticipation…like they were waiting for my reaction to something. Well, everyone except Edward, he had the widest smiled I had seen on him in a very long time and Alice was frowning slightly like she was trying to see something that was cloudy or non-existent. She always had a hard time seeing anything related to the wolf pack, so she was probably trying to see my future.

I evaluated the looks on my family for a moment and then looked back to Seth leaning in closer to his face again and whispered, "Why is everyone staring at us like that? Do you know?"

He blushed a little and looked down sheepishly, taking his eyes off my face for the first time since our hug had ended. "Yeah, um, there's something I have to tell you. Maybe we should sit down first." He said taking my hand gently in his and leading me toward the front steps of the house. When we reached the steps he let go of my hand to dust off the step and then gestured for me to sit down and he sat down next to me. I could see in my peripheral vision that his gaze was back on my face.

My chest got tight as my breath caught and I couldn't bring myself to look up from my fingers that nervously twitched on my lap. Suddenly I was feeling déjà vu, I knew from my experience with Connor that these were the actions of a guy about to deliver really bad news…the type of news that leaves a girl broken hearted. My heart began to pick up pace as my mind braced itself for the blow. Did he imprint on someone since I last talked to him? Did he decide that we weren't right for each other or something? I began to shake as I sat on the bottom step afraid to look back up to meet his gaze. Would my family all just stand there and watch me get dumped? My stomach lurched in my abdomen as I suddenly felt really nauseated.

Seth reached over and took my left hand again and my gaze followed it as he brought it up to his lips and kissed it. A shiver ran through my body, the feel of his lips against my skin thrilled me to the core. He held my hand in his, gently caressing the back of it with his thumb and looked into my eyes with a slightly worried expression as he began.

"Lina, you are so beautiful…I already knew you were beautiful, but you are even more beautiful in person." I blushed as I stared at him in disbelief…_Here we go, he led off with the sweet comment followed by the unspoken "but"_.

"I have been so excited and nervous to see you, to hold you in my arms for real, and smell your sweetness. I've done nothing but dream about kissing you and telling you exactly how I feel about you the right way, the way you deserve. When I got off the plane I was practically jumping up and down in anticipation. You can ask Edward, he's been laughing at me all day." He nodded up toward Edward who nodded laughing slightly as I looked up at him.

"I don't know how to tell you this, because it caught me completely off guard, we really know so little about the ins and outs of this whole wolf thing that we learn something new every day."

_Oh God! He imprinted on someone between the plane and home? Is this really happening to me?_ Tears began to well in my eyes. I was terrified of the next words about to come out of his mouth. I knew I shouldn't have opened my heart to him, to let myself fall in love…but I was too late. _Stupid Lina! Stupid pathetic Lina! You should have known this would happen! _I screamed at myself in my head.

Edward was suddenly standing in front of me turning my face gently to meet his gaze. "Shh…Lina stop panicking and let him finish. It's not what you think."

I sucked in a big breath as I tried to put together what Seth was saying with what Edward was saying. I turned back to Seth, my eyes wide with confusion and fear.

He blushed again and looked at his shoes and then after a moment he looked back up at me with tears in his eyes. They weren't tears of sadness… "The guys always said that it was seeing the face of a person that bonded them. I had seen so many pictures of you that I could wallpaper my wall with them all by now between what you've given me and the tons that Alice and Nessie have sent me. I watched your play so many times that the computer automatically brings it up first when I open the media player. Not to mention the countless hours we've spent talking over the web. " He added with a soft laugh.

"I just assumed that if I was going to imprint on you that I would have the second I saw your face…the face that I look at every night before I go to bed and every morning when I first wake up…the face that I have been dying to see in person for the past two months." He reached up and cupped my cheek in his hand, "The face of the woman I've fallen in love with."

Now we were both in tears again. "I had decided that if I hadn't imprinted with you _then_ I was sure to never imprint on anyone ever because I KNEW you were the one I was meant to be with. When you pulled up to the house just now I couldn't breathe, I couldn't wait for you to get out so I could run out and hug you and surprise you, but when you stepped out of the car and I saw you for real, in person…It happened and confirmed everything that I knew in my heart from the beginning. You really are meant for me Angelina Cullen."

I must have looked pretty ridiculous, my mouth was open, my eyes were wide with large tears rolling down from them and dripping off my chin. I sat staring at this beautiful man who was saying not only that he loved me, but that he believed that he was _made_ for me. My heart was full of joy and disbelief and I couldn't seem to formulate a complete thought much less words.

Finally I began to stammer incoherently and then managed to begin forming words. "Y..yy…you imprinted on mmme?"

He looked at me with such deep admiration and concern as he reached up and wiped the tears from my cheeks nodding. It was the same look I had seen in Sam's eyes in the pictures of him and his family, the same look I had seen in Jake's eyes when he was lost in his world with Nessie, the same look that every one of my angelic family members had for their mates. It was love, a deep earth moving love.

"Is this real?" I asked and then a disturbing thought hit me…_Was he really in love with me for me or had this all been just imprinting from the very beginning? Was this just a way for his free will to be stolen from him? Would he really have felt this way if some biological push hadn't induced it? Was it really real?_

Edward stepped in again, taking my free hand. "No Lina, listen…do you trust your brothers?"

"Of course." I answered in a daze.

"Okay, then listen. You know what my capabilities are, as well as Jasper's." On cue Jasper appeared standing at Edward's side. "We were both there at the airport, we were both in the house just now when he saw you, you know we know what was on his heart and mind before he imprinted and I can tell you with all certainty…He loves you…and it's not due to a biological imperative. It was overwhelming the second the plane landed. I could hear his thoughts screaming from inside of the plane before he ever made it to where we were waiting to pick him up. It's real, Lina. Any reason to ever question whether it's safe to really open your heart to him is gone forever now because he is yours. Lina, you get the best of both worlds, you know he loves you of his own free will because he already did long before he imprinted on you, and yet since you are his imprint you will never have to worry that you will suffer Leah's fate because there will never be the risk that he will imprint on someone else and leave you."

My gaze turned to Jasper who nodded. "Edward is right. I felt it, it really was overwhelming…and long before he saw you. And now that he's imprinted, his feelings haven't changed really…they're just a bit stronger and slightly more protective, but still very much the same."

I turned to look at Seth's pleading eyes. He was looking for a confirmation that his feelings were returned, that I wasn't mad that he imprinted, that I would take him into my heart completely as he had done with me. There were no words I could speak, no words powerful enough to convey what I felt in that instant. I reached up and took his face in my hands, pushing his tears away with my thumbs and then I leaned forward and kissed him softly on the lips. I pulled back slightly and looked into those deep beautiful eyes and whispered softly "I love you with all of my heart."

The face of my beloved Seth was instantly set aglow at my words. His eyes shined brightly as they brimmed with tears, a wide smile stretching his lips across his face. He stood up and pulled me up into his arms and kissed me in a long, soft, passionate kiss. We could barely hear my family cheer as the world once again blurred into oblivion. He picked me up and spun in circles as I tightened my grip around his neck and wrapped my legs around his waist. We both laughed and kissed again and again. It was a perfect magical moment. I was happy and in love and as long as I lived, nobody would ever be able to take this moment away from me.

* * *

_Author's Note: Once again I'm not happy with my description of the shirt. I just happened upon it on ebay…It's not really designer, but it's definitely unique. I'm going to post a picture link of my profile page again if you want to check it out. _

_Thanks again for all of the reviews, I try to send replies to all registered reviewers, but I can't do that for the anonymous ones…so here's your thanks…THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR REVIEWING!!! Please keep them coming. I was so thrilled surpass the 100 reviews mark!_


	40. Chapter 40

**40. Trying Not to Skip Ahead**

I wasn't sure how long we had been out in the front yard together in each other's arms. The chill in the air didn't even begin to faze me and it had little to do with the immense heat that radiated off of Seth. I looked around to find that we were alone in the yard, but I knew that there was no such thing as privacy here. That's when the realization hit me that my boyfriend was a wolf and I was no longer in need of a family security patrol following me on a date. My eyes lit up as a devious smile spread across my face. Seth looked at me questioningly.

"What's brewing in that gorgeous head of yours?" he asked with a crooked smile as he kissed my forehead.

"Oh, I just realized that my boyfriend is now all the protection I will ever need and we could say…go out on our own without any stealth family supervision. How would you feel about going for a drive?"

His eyes twinkled and he reached down to kiss me again and pulled back keeping his forehead touching mine with his eyes still closed while breathing in deeply appearing to be enjoying my scent nearly as much as I did his. "Sounds like heaven to me." He whispered.

I leaned back looking up toward the sky and said just slightly louder, "Okay, so I assume you heard that. If anyone has an objection you need to speak now or forever hold your peace."

The only sound that met my warning was the sound of the cicadas chirping in the nearby woods. I waited just a few seconds more and then with a giggle I grabbed Seth's hand and ran toward my car and then we were off. Seth didn't even react to my speed demon tendencies as we traveled along the highway hand in hand. I could feel Seth's gaze on me as I drove and it sent shudders of excitement through me. At first I wasn't sure where we were going and then suddenly I knew exactly where I wanted to take him and I turned off the main highway onto the side road that led to my intended destination.

A few more minutes up the road and I pulled off into the parking area just behind the retaining wall that overlooked my favorite valley. Seth finally looked away from me to see where we were, a knowing smile spreading across his face. He opened the door and stood up looking out in the distance.

"So I get to see the much talked about valley of gold huh?"

"I figured that it was only fair that you get to see my favorite place first." I said from my side of the car as I made my way around the front reaching my hand out for him to take.

I led him over the wall where I pushed down on his shoulders indicating for him to sit down. He straddled the wall facing me and I sat down to his right with my legs flung over the far side of the wall and his leg on that side. I cuddled up to him with my arms wrapped around his chest and my head settled in the middle of his upper chest. He wrapped his long warm arms around my shoulders and kissed the top of my head before resting his cheek there and gazing out at the horizon with me. I took a deep breath inhaling his wonderful scent and trying to brand this memory on my brain with as much detail as humanly possible.

"Wow," he finally sighed, "this is so amazing."

"I know, isn't the view incredible." I answered.

He laughed a little, "I wasn't necessarily talking about the view sweetheart. You feel so good, it's like you're a perfect fit." He said as he squeezed me a little tighter with his arms.

I turned up to look at him, still a little in awe of the fact that he was here with his arms really around me and was mine. We locked eyes and I could tell he was thinking the exact same thing. He slowly moved in closer to me, closing the gap between us until he was so close that I could feel his breath on my lips, his eyes still locked on mine. "I love you more than anything Angelina Cecelia Cullen. I never knew it was even possible to love someone so much. No words have been invented that could ever describe it." He whispered on my lips and then closed the tiny gap that was left and his soft warm lips met mine as our mouths parted and our kiss deepened warm and sweet. My chest expanded and the muscles tightened in delight more and more with every second that the kiss continued and my right hand moved from its place around his chest to comb through his hair willing him closer. My mind was a blur of color and sensation as the world once again disappeared round me, as the only thought that penetrated the haze was the fact that he tasted even better than he smelled. I could have stayed in this spot forever in the embrace of my Seth with his lips molded to mine sharing his breath.

The kiss went on for a long time and yet when he finally pulled away it felt too soon. My lips ached for more. My hand still lingering in his hair pulled him back down as I stretched up to meet his lips again taking control of the kiss this time, desperate to impart with actions that his sentiments were returned whole heartedly. Finally I released the tension on his head and pulled back meeting his gaze with half closed eyes shuddering in delight. We were both panting slightly with the intensity of the intimate moment we had just shared, so much more intense than either of us had ever even begun to imagine was possible.

"Wow, I…I dreamed of this day so many times and even in the best of those dreams I never knew, never could in a million years know…wow." Seth mumbled trying to put words to the indescribable as his eyes searched mine, but he didn't have to put words to it because I knew exactly what he meant.

I put my finger to his mouth and shook my head slightly. "I know, I know exactly what you mean and words could never even begin to do it justice. _I love you_ just isn't enough."

He removed his left hand from behind my shoulder and brought it forward to run is fingers along my chin and cheek. It made a circuit back and for a few times as his touch made my breath speed again and then he gently pulled my chin up a little more and bent down to kiss me again as his hand slid into my hair. There was a hunger there this time, a need to deepen the intimacy as our mouths moved together with more and more passion. Before I knew what had happened I was in his arms being carried over to my car as his eyes burned into mine. He sat me on the hood and stood in front of me as I wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him close again as the kiss grew more and more intense. His lips left mine and began to explore my cheek and jaw and then down to my neck. I jumped back instantly in peals of laughter as I instinctually covered my neck with my hands and ducked my chin. He froze looking at me with confusion that slowly turned into amusement as the hunger in his eyes was replaced by a twinkle of understanding.

"So your neck is ticklish huh?"

I blushed as I shook my head. "My neck has always been ridiculously ticklish. My mother, Renee, noticed it when I was a baby and used to play with me all the time that way and I think she made it worse." I said laughing slightly. "Then Emmett found out and tortured me with it throughout my childhood."

He beamed at me, rejoicing in the joy of learning more new things about me. He playfully ran his hand along my shoulders and then up my neck again causing the same reaction again as he chuckled under his breath looking me in the eyes again, "I'm going to have fun with this."

My smile was full of mirth, "I'm sure you will, just remember that someday soon I'll figure out your weakness too and then you're in trouble!"

He moved in again just inches from my lips and whispered in a sexy voice that teetered on the edge of amusement and hunger, "Oh, but I thought it was pretty clear what my weakness is…" Then he closed the gap taking me into another passionate kiss. The intensity was growing again, neither of us wanting to let go. His hands began to roam my back and sides when his finger slid under the edge of my shirt making contact with my skin. A shock of electrical pleasure radiated through my body as I reflexively pulled him closer wanting to feel more. That was when the realization hit and I pooled all of the self-control I could muster to pull free of his kiss.

I was once again shaking and finding it hard to find my breath. It all came too naturally, too easy. The love was already there, so fierce, so loyal; the comfort was there, neither of us feeling any awkwardness; and the physical attraction was definitely there. It took most couples weeks if not months together to develop that level of intimacy, to resist the desperate urges that we already felt for one another. But I was still new to everything in the world of romance. It was only two months ago, in this very spot in fact, that I had experienced my first time holding hands with a boy and sitting with a boys arm around my shoulder. There were so many steps that were supposed to come between that point and where Seth and I were already most certainly headed. I loved him so much that I wanted to be part of him in every way, but I also wanted the experience of slowly working our way up to this. Enjoying the early days of innocence and joy at being with one another before the complications that physical intimacy could bring. I needed him, but I also needed things to slow down, after all I was only sixteen and very new to being an active part of the outside world. Deep down I really was an old-fashioned girl who was raised by literally old-fashioned people for the most part.

Seth was staring at me slightly puzzled by the expressions that were crossing my face in the seconds that had passed since I had so abruptly pulled away. Thankfully he only seemed puzzled and not angry or hurt. I tried to pull the words together to explain my thoughts, but they were seriously lacking. Finally I did my best to make him understand as the beautiful owner of my heart stood in front of me listening intently while gazing at my face lovingly, thankfully without a hint of frustration, as he held my hands in my lap. When I had finished my less than eloquent explanation of my actions I looked down feeling truly awkward for the first time since our conversation on the front porch. I studied my hands feeling so conflicted and then I saw Seth's right hand leave my own and travel the distance from my lap to my chin. He gently lifted my face so I was once again staring into those beautiful eyes.

"Have I told you in the last two minutes how much I love you?" His eyes twinkling at me as I gave him a shy smile. "It's okay, I understand, I know what you mean and I feel the same way. I want you in the most desperate way, but I also want you in every small way possible. I want to do this all the right way, like I said earlier today. I want to show you that I love you in the ways that you deserve, and this is just one of many. You're right, we need to take things slower…but it is very hard when all the necessary components are already there…love, desire, emotional intimacy…it's going to be difficult, but it's the right thing…for both of us. Someday we'll be grateful that we took things slow."

He leaned down touching his forehead to mine as I smiled at him gratefully. He was so amazing and so precious, my Seth. Just when I thought that it was impossible to love him more he would zing me once again. I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him in again for a hug as I curled myself into the inviting space of his neck. I took long slow breaths pulling his scent deep into my chest, relishing the closeness of being in Seth's arms. I heard a contented sigh leave his chest as he nestled his face in my hair drawing a deep breath of his own. We sat there together warm and happy as I listened to the steady cadence of my Seth's kind and beautiful heart.

Finally he pulled away letting his hands rest on my knees as he studied them for a moment. "I think I know what we have to do to make this easier for us to stay smart about it all." I watched expectantly as he fidgeted with the seam of my jeans measuring his words, he finally looked up. "Well, for all intents and purposes, while I might feel and look like a kid still, the reality is that legally I'm an adult, so maybe we should look at all of this from a legal standpoint. You turn seventeen in April right?" I nodded in affirmation. "So technically we have a year and a half before it would be legal for us to take things any further, so that will be our outside incentive. We'll wait until you are eighteen before we seriously consider crossing that line."

I smiled up at him with a sideways look, "You make it sound so easy when we both know it won't be."

He shrugged with a twinkle returning to his eye, "We both know it won't be EASY, but if we swear to each other then I think we can hold ourselves to it." I smiled up at him, running my hand behind his head again and playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. I pulled him back down to give him a gentle and much more chaste kiss than we had been engaged in before and then grabbed his hand and pulled him over to sit next to me on the hood of the car, drawing his hand over my head to rest on my shoulder and resting my head on his shoulder.

We sat there the rest of the evening watching the sun drop to the horizon and light the distant canyon in it's golden hues as it had the first time I sat in this place. There it was, the symbolism that encompassed what Seth was to me. We had often compared ending a day without talking to one another as a day ending without a sunset. My whole life I had lived with my family in the shadow of the day, holding back, being careful to not bring attention to myself for fear of bringing attention to them. Seth was my sun drawing me out into the daylight, letting me share myself with a piece of the world that had formerly been off limits. He was warmth and peace and joy and I was free to share every single piece of myself with him, not having to hold back for the safety of others…and I knew that I was all of those things for him as well.

We gazed out on the beauty of the sunset as we talked about all the things on our minds and hearts. We discussed our goals and desires and the things we'd like to do in life. In a way it was almost like we were planning out our futures as we discussed where I would like to go to college and what we thought about family and children. We sat there long after the sun had left the sky and the unusually clear night revealed a beautiful blanket of stars above us. We laid back on the hood of my car, hand in hand, side by side, and appreciated the beauty of God's creation totally losing track of time.

I nearly jumped out of my skin as my phone rang in my pocket…my family's habit of always knowing where I was and what I was doing had gotten the best of them. They knew I was safe with Seth, but they were still uncomfortable with the new sensation of having no clue where I was at any given time.

"Um, we hate to interrupt, but it's getting pretty late and well, we'd like to see Seth too. Actually, we'd like to talk to both of you if you would please come back home. We may have all day and all night, but you humans are going to have to be getting to sleep eventually tonight and we'd like to talk first." My father said in his best diplomatic voice.

"Oh, sorry Dad, I really didn't mean to stay gone this long. We were just talking and time got away from us. I brought him to my favorite valley. We'll be home in twenty."

"Okay sweetheart, see you then. Be careful."

"Always am!" I replied cheerfully hitting the end button my phone. I leaned over and hugged Seth close giving him a long soft kiss on the lips. "Time to return to the real world. You ready?"

"As long as I'm with you, I'll go anywhere."

I winked as a wide Cheshire cat smile slid across my face, "Careful, I might hold you to that someday."

He reached across tucking a stray lock of hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead. "Please do."

We got back in the car and made our way back to the Cullen homestead.


	41. Chapter 41

**41. Big Compromises**

Just as I had promised, twenty minutes later we were pulling into my parking spot in the garage. We got out and Seth walked around to my side of the car and took my hand as we left the garage. He leaned over to give me one more quick kiss before we were in view of the house.

We walked in the back door expecting to see everyone amassed at the dining room table, but to my surprise it was empty. We made our way through the kitchen and into the living room. I was pleasantly surprised to find that only my parents, Edward, Bella, and Jake were waiting for us.

Edward answered my unspoken question immediately, "They all went out hunting. We thought it better to have a smaller group discuss things and then we can pass on important information to everyone else later."

We nodded in understanding as I felt myself reflexively tighten my grip on Seth's hand. This was going to be "the big talk". I had managed to go my whole life without having to have one of _these_ discussions. Even while dating Connor my parents had never deemed it necessary, but as my brothers already knew, our relationship was already starting at a point that most couples don't reach for a long time after they begin dating. Seth and I went and sat on the couch, still holding one another's hands. We all sat looking uncomfortably at one another. I could tell that they were just as uncomfortable about this talk as I was.

"Well," my father finally started, "I guess we need to discuss things. This is a new situation for all of us and it's been quite a few years since we were dealing with a somewhat similar situation with Nessie and Jacob." He paused for a minute pulling together his thoughts.

"You know in many ways this is a far less complicated situation." He began diplomatically in an attempt to calm our anxiety. "Nessie's accelerated aging definitely made things far more complex. The truth of the matter is that you are a very mature young lady Lina. You are wise beyond your years in many respects and typically make very responsible choices. But everyone in this room also knows the amazingly powerful draw of the bond of mates…it can sometimes make the most responsible person make irrational and imprudent decisions."

I sighed as I thought of how hard it had been to pull away from Seth when we were kissing on my car. It was definitely true that the bond was very powerful and intoxicating and could very easily lead to a slip in judgment.

Suddenly I heard Edward chuckle from his position behind Bella on the far side of the room. I looked over to see him smiling at us with a look of pride. "Wow, I'm impressed."

Seth and I knew exactly what he was referring to, but the rest of the family looked at him questioningly. He looked at us and we nodded giving him permission to share his insights on what he had seen in our minds.

"Carlisle, this part of the conversation appears to be unnecessary. They've imposed their own limits after feeling the intensity of the relationship. They have promised one another that they will not cross the line of physical intimacy until after she turns eighteen. Then they will discuss it and decide how to proceed."

I stole a glance at my Mother who was looking very pleased. My father seemed to be contemplating, but also very relieved that we had reached these decisions on our own without having to be encouraged by the family.

Bella gazed at me with a knowing smile. She once told me that even though her human memories are faint, some of the strongest ones were linked to how difficult it was for her and Edward to hold off on physical intimacy. Thankfully Seth and I don't have the added obstacle of bloodlust, but then again, romantic restraint will most likely prove to be far more difficult when the possibility of death isn't in the way.

Jacob also looked our way with an expression of compassion and understanding. He had far more than a measly year and a half to wait. It took seven years for Nessie to reach physical maturity and a physical attraction to develop in the first place and then out of respect for her parents and a desire not to rush her, he held her at a distance another two years after that before they were finally able to be together. Out of everyone in this room, Jacob definitely understood our predicament the best.

Seth put his arm around my shoulder in an attempt to further support me as my parents continued on, although now the focus was turned to Seth and it really should have been me providing the support.

My father's gaze was kind but also very serious when he began addressing Seth. "I know this is new to you and you probably haven't thought this far yet, but where do you think your next choices will lead you Seth?"

I looked confused for a moment before I realized what my father was asking. As I knew from my experiences with Jake and Nessie, a wolf has a nearly pathological need to be near his imprint. To be separated from their imprint and unable to provide for her and protect her is nearly unbearable for them. He was asking what Seth planned to do for living arrangements.

"Well, sir," Seth replied cautiously, "You're correct in the respect that I haven't had a chance to think it through very well, but I do know that I need to be where Lina is. I know you understand this. The one great relief is that my job is very flexible. I can do my work from anywhere as long as I have my computer and a decent internet connection and the ability to fly out for meetings that can't be taken care of via teleconferencing when I have to have them and living so close to New York now might open up some possibilities on this coast for me as well."

"And when you do have meetings that pull you out of town?"

Seth turned to me and I could see the pain in his eyes at just the thought of having to leave me. He swallowed hard and then returned his gaze at my father as he spoke in a very slow and measured cadence. "It will be very hard to leave her, but at the same time my job will help me provide for her some day, so I will be able to do what I have to do when that time comes."

Then he lit up for a second as another thought came to mind. "Of course if it's during a school holiday maybe she could come along." My father's eyebrows rose reflexively and I heard Edward stifle a chuckle from his place across the room.

"Of course that would be if Jake and Nessie were willing to come along too for protection when I had to work and for supervision to make sure we kept our promise." He added hastily. My father still looked a bit disconcerted, but slightly more appeased.

"And living arrangements?" my father continued.

"Oh I thought he could just stay in my room." I jumped in sarcastically trying to break the serious tone of the conversation. To my chagrin this only resulted in frowns and a shocked sideways glance from Seth.

I rolled my eyes, "Only teasing, but even if I weren't it's not like anything's going to happen with a house full of vampires. We might as well be sleeping on the living room couch…we'd have nearly the same level of privacy!" I saw a few shrugs of acknowledgement around the room, but none of them came from my parents who continued to frown.

Seth shook his head as he whispered "We really need to work on your comedic timing hon…not really the best time for that one." This brought light chuckles from all of the spectators in the room.

Then he turned to my father and looked him straight in the eye. "Well sir, that's the part I haven't gotten to yet. I was kind of hoping that maybe Jake and Nessie would let me stay with them for a while until I can find a place of my own nearby." He said casting a glance at Jake when he mentioned the last part. Jake simply nodded in acknowledgement.

"I was thinking that if I get lucky enough to find something in the next month or so that perhaps Jake, Nessie, Lina, and I could go to back west over the school's Christmas break to pack up my things and so that Lina can come meet the rest of the pack and my family." My head shot over reflexively at the mention of me going to La Push. I was hoping my parents would agree because I've always wanted to see the area and I'd love to meet all the people that I'd heard so much about and see Sue and Charlie again. A little lump formed in my throat at the thought of meeting Leah though.

"Let's focus on finding you a place first, then we'll discuss the move." My father said with a smile.

From where I was sitting it looked like my going West with Seth was a viable option. I looked over at Edward for confirmation and he gave me a smile and a wink. I smiled and started bouncing slightly in my seat from the excitement. All of the discussion about moving and Seth not leaving was making it all so real. Seth was really going to be a tangible and permanent part of my life. I fought a squeal of delight as it all started to solidify in my mind. Seth and Edward both laughed at me, both of them reading me like a book.

After the serious business had been addressed, we all sat and visited for the next few hours until my involuntary yawns around three am caught the attention of my newest overprotective guardian.

"You need to go to sleep." He said with a smile tucking the large chunk of hair that was interfering with is ability to see my face from where he was sitting behind my ear.

I grabbed hold of his arm with the strongest grip I could manage, "No! I don't want you to leave. If I have to go to bed then they're going to make you leave and go to Jake's and I don't want you to leave…I've only had you for twelve hours!"

"It's okay babe. I'll only be about a mile away at Jake and Nessie's. I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me from now on." He said with a crooked smile as he kissed my nose.

I grabbed his arm and wrapped it around my waist as I leaned back on his chest. "No, no, no. I'll prop my eyelids open with toothpicks if I have to. I'm not going to bed and having you leave this house, no way no how!" I whined like a three year old

"Lina, he has to leave sometime." My father admonished from across the room.

"I know that, but not tonight." I retorted tightening his arm around my waist for emphasis

He looked over and sighed. "You both look like you're about to pass out any second and there's no way you can get good rest with all of the commotion down here. I guess just this one night you can spend the night here with Lina, Seth. But don't you two start expecting it to become a regular occurrence, I'm only allowing this since you just got here today and it's been a big day. And remember, we'll be listening."

I jumped up and ran over to my father throwing my arms around his neck. "Thank you Dad, Thank you!" I gave him a kiss on the cheek and then turned to Seth grabbing his hand.

"Come on slow poke. It's time to go to bed!" Suddenly the sleepiness seemed secondary to my pleasure at the fact that not only was Seth not going to have to leave me tonight, but that my Dad actually gave us permission to sleep in my room. It was all true, they would hear everything, and probably with even more detail than they would on a normal night because they would all be vigilant and Edward would be scope locked on our thoughts, but I didn't care. I was going to get to really fall sleep cuddled up to my real Seth as opposed to my Seth scented blanket.


	42. Chapter 42

**42. Sleepkissing?**

We reached the doorway to my room and I led him in. He looked around slowly taking in the full effect in person. He'd seen it before of course via my web cam tour, but I knew it was different in person. He walked over to my dresser looking at my framed pictures on the top and hanging behind it on the wall. His eyes casually glanced over the faces of my family throughout the years, everyone looking exactly the same except for Nessie and me, and then as the pictures become more and more current I was the only one to change and grow. He smiled as he touched my face in picture after picture. Then his eyes fell on the center picture frame on my dresser and his smiled widened as he saw that the face in this particular frame was his own.

"Yeah, I sort of stole it out of Jake and Nessie's vacation album from their trip to La Push."

He chuckled lightly, "Well, you should see my room." Then he smiled a little wider with a twinkle, "Actually it sounds like you might actually get to at Christmas time. Did I read that right that your parents were okay with that?"

"Yeah, I looked to Edward for confirmation and he smiled and winked at me. If you can find a place in time then I think it's pretty much a done deal."

He reached over and tenderly wrapped his arms around my waist leaning down to rest his forehead on my own. "I can't wait to show you off at La Push! Everyone's going to love you." He whispered with a proud smile.

I tried to smile back as my nerves made my stomach lurch in anxiety over meeting his loved ones. I really hoped that they all liked me. I wasn't so worried about his Mom and Charlie. I already knew and liked them, but I was worried about Leah and the rest of the pack. "Will they be mad that I'm taking you away from them?" I said in panic as I realized that they might do more than simply not like me, they might absolutely hate me.

He smiled and gently kissed the furrow that formed between my eyebrows. "No sweetheart. Anyone who's ever imprinted will expect it automatically and even those who haven't have seen enough to at least understand."

"I wonder what your family's going to say when you tell them? Oh gosh…I just realized that they don't even know yet. When are you going to tell them?"

He sighed looking over at the clock, "Well, definitely not tonight. It's already after midnight there…and speaking of the time, we need to be getting to sleep don't we?"

I looked over at my bed and then back to Seth. I still couldn't believe that my parents were allowing this. "Yeah, I need to go clean up and change into my pajamas…do you have anything to clean up with or change into? I haven't seen your bags or anything yet."

"Oh, yeah, I guess I left them downstairs not thinking about it as you were dragging me insistently up here!"

"Okay, well you go get your bags and get changed in the downstairs bathroom and I'll go take care of my business up here in my bathroom. I'll meet you back here in ten?"

"Yes ma'am" he saluted at me as I rolled my eyes. He left the room closing the door behind him as I made my way over to my dresser. I had more than a few options for pajamas. Since none of the rest of the family ever had a need for pajamas Alice was completely obsessed with me having a complete collection of all possible types. I had everything ranging from cutesy little nightgowns to long sleeve flannel two-piece sets and everything in between. I looked at the selection trying to find something that wasn't overly frumpy and yet not overly sensual either and also not too warm since Seth's body temperature was so hot that it would probably roast me overnight anyway. I finally decided to focus on the temperature aspect of the situation settling for a pair of lavender cotton shorts with the word princess written all over them and the matching tank top.

I ran to the bathroom turning on the water and letting it heat as I brushed my teeth in the mirror. I jumped in the shower to wash off as quickly as possible and shave since my bare legs will potentially make contact with his skin. It was the fastest shower I had ever taken as I jumped out 8 minutes later toweling off quickly and throwing on my jammies. I began to make my way back to my room while still combing my wet hair.

I walked into my bedroom and my breath caught in my chest as I looked over to my bed to see Seth stretched out on top of the comforter leaning against the headboard with his hands tucked causally behind his head smiling at me warmly. He was wearing a pair of cut off sweats and an extremely thin tank top that stretched appealingly across his muscled chest. My expression was involuntary and he laughed knowingly at my reaction. I finally managed after a few seconds to tear my gaze away from the beautiful man relaxing on my bed.

I walked over to the dresser placing my comb on top and walked over to shut off the bright overhead light. I was shaking as I walked over to the bed and climbed in next to Seth. The moonlight beamed in through my plate glass wall and I could see that his face was turned toward me. Then he settled down on the bed and reached his arms out toward me inviting me to cuddle up to him. I didn't even bother with blankets knowing I was going to be cuddled up to a living radiator. I slid next to him curling myself next to his side resting my head on his chest as he draped his arms around me. I turned my face slightly closer to his chest as I took in a deep breath, sighing at how much more amazing it was to be sleeping with the real Seth instead of a Seth substitute. My head rose with his chest as he took a deep breath, most likely coming to the same conclusion before he gently kissed the top of my wet hair. While a part of me wanted to hold on to this rare moment forever, my body was unable to comply with my wishes, especially while enveloped in such comforting warmth, and I drifted off into a deliriously happy and contented sleep.

When consciousness reclaimed my body, my eyes snapped open to make sure that Seth was still with me. I was instantly relieved to recognize the feel of his warm embrace still around my body as my head rose and fell slightly with his deep even breaths. I closed my eyes drawing in another deep breath, relishing in the sensation of waking up in the arms of my Seth. As gently as I could, doing my best not to wake him, I leaned up so I could watch his face as he slept. He was so beautiful lying there; his features so relaxed with a small smile still playing at the edges of his mouth.

I carefully shifted my weight ever so slightly bringing my right arm up to his chest and resting my chin on my hand. It didn't take very long before his beautiful brown eyes fluttered and then slowly opened as a gentle smile spread across his face.

"Exactly how long have you been watching me sleep?" he asked with a twinkle in his eyes.

"Not long," I smiled back, "I couldn't look away though. You're so cute when you're sleeping."

He laughed a deep gregarious laugh, "You are too. Did you know that you talk in your sleep?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, a lovely hereditary trait I share with Bella. Edward used to sneak in her room at night when they first got together because it was the only time he got an unedited glimpse into her psyche. So, what did I say?" I asked with chagrin.

He smiled as he reached up and kissed my forehead. "Oh just that you loved me and want to bear my pups."

I smacked his chest playfully, "Oh I did not say that! I would never refer to our babies as pups!" his eyes lit up at the mention of _our babies _and then he laughed. "What did I really say?"

"I couldn't make all of it out, but you said something about loving me and then you begged Leah not to kill you." He was laughing hard again at that one. "And then later on you actually reached up and kissed me in your sleep."

My mouth fell open and my eyes practically popped out of their sockets. "I did what?!"

He was laughing again. "Yeah, It was interesting to say the least. I hadn't realized how much you were holding back yesterday." I sucked in a deep breath in my embarrassment. He bit his lower lip and then added. "Yeeeaaah, I actually had to get up and leave the room for a little while just to get my head straight again."

My mouth drew up into an "o" as I sighed "oops…sorry."

He hugged me tightly smiling at me with a look I couldn't quite categorize, "It's okay. It's not like you made the decision to do it. It just sort of goes to show just how difficult this all might prove to be for us if the impulses are so deeply ingrained."

I shyly bit my lip and was caught off guard by the shudder that ran through Seth's body as he looked at me. "I'm sorry I made it harder for you though." I finally answered back.

"Well, what did we expect? It wasn't exactly the smartest decision to share a bed the same night we discover just how intense our physical attraction is and then agreeing to hold off for a year and a half. As much as I adore sleeping in the same bed as you, it's good that your parents won't be allowing it often because I really don't think we'd be able to hold ourselves to our promise otherwise."

I nodded in reluctant agreement. It was so wonderful to fall asleep and wake up in his arms, but he was right, it would spell certain doom for our promise if it were a regular occurrence. "I'm just glad you came back tonight so I could wake up with you this morning." I finally added cuddling back up to his chest and taking another deep drink of his scent.

"I couldn't stay away." He whispered tilting my head back up toward his face, meeting my lips with his own in a tender kiss. I carefully pulled myself up so I we were no longer straining to make our lips meet and kissed him back and then laid my head on the pillow next to his, tucking my nose under his chin as he turned his body so we were laying side by side facing one another as I placed my right hand on his side. He rested his lips on my forehead as he played with my hair with his left hand and then hugged it behind my back. Both of our breath sounds slowed as we drifted back off to sleep together.


	43. Chapter 43

**43. 'Tunnel of Love' Vision**

It was noon before we finally pulled ourselves out of bed and made our way back downstairs to spend more time with my family. As we made it to the ground floor I heard an amazingly loud growl come from Seth's stomach and I turned to face him in shock.

"Oh honey…I'm sorry! I'm the worst girlfriend ever. You must be starving with that wolf metabolism of yours. I should have fed you hours ago!"

He smiled at me as he cupped my cheeks with his hands, "You know, I didn't even notice I was even hungry until just now. Funny how spending nine amazing hours in the arms of the one you love can make you completely unaware of anything else." He bent down and kissed me sweetly on the lips and then pulled me into a warm hug.

I reached up and kissed his cheek and the grabbed his hand dragging him into the kitchen and sitting him down on a barstool in front of the island stove countertop. He watched every move I made as I walked to the fridge and pulled out the makings for ham sandwiches and began to assemble a line of sandwiches. I asked what condiments he preferred and made a mental note for future reference. I took one sandwich and a hand full of chips and placed them on my own plate and then piled the other five sandwiches and the bag of chips in front of Seth. I was well acquainted with the wolf appetite thanks to Jacob and knew that as long as it had been since he last ate that he would need extra food to catch back up. I walked back around to sit next to him at the counter and when I got settled in my seat he was still staring at me and hadn't even touched his food yet. I frowned looking at the pile of sandwiches and then looked back up at him.

"Do you not like ham? If so we have other options."

He smiled at me as he took my hands and kissed them. "No, I love ham." I cocked my head at him still confused as to why he wasn't eating. "You are so wonderful and beautiful. I just can't take my eyes off of you. Even watching you make sandwiches is fascinating."

I rolled my eyes. He was so sweet, but this constant stream of compliments was difficult for me to take. I'd always had a hard time taking compliments gracefully and having them constantly hurled at me was not making it any easier.

As if he were reading my mind he sighed and shook my hands back and forth lightly as he said, "Honey, you are going to have to get used to getting compliments, because I can't help it!"

I shook my head with a crooked smile as I turned back to my sandwich with a sigh. Finally Seth picked up his first sandwich and inhaled it in just three bites. In the time it took me to eat my one sandwich and handful of chips he had finished his entire stack of sandwiches and half the bag of chips. I was suddenly painfully aware of the fact that someday I was going to be spending a lot of time shopping for groceries to keep up with his consumption rate.

It wasn't until we had finished our meal that I realized that the house was empty. We hadn't seen anybody yet all day. _Wow, they must have been particularly impressed with Seth's resolve last night if they willingly left us alone before we were up for the day. That's good._ I thought to myself.

I took a few minutes to clean up our mess from lunch after which we made our way to the couch in the living room to start making phone calls. Seth wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close beside him as he put is cell phone on his lap and hit the speaker phone button so that we could both hear the conversation. We called his Mom first. She seemed a bit sad that he would be moving, but also relieved that he had imprinted and she didn't have to worry about a repeat of the Sam/Leah situation sometime down the road. She congratulated both of us and was extremely excited about the prospect of my coming to visit over Christmas vacation.

Leah wasn't home when we called, so Seth tried her cell phone next. She sounded a bit reserved, but she too seemed relieved that the imprint situation wasn't going to be a problem. I found myself wondering if there was a chance that she and I could end up being friends someday. Anything was possible right?

The pack members were very supportive and happy for us and seemed to be even more excited than Sue at the prospect of meeting me. They were already talking about getting a bonfire together for the occasion. The bonfires I had learned were a very bonding experience for the pack where they learned about the legends of their tribe and their origins and also a special event for all of the wolf imprints too. I was excited to be invited to experience it for myself.

As our last conversation came to a close my family began to filter back in giving both of us hugs and offering congratulations as they came through. Even Rosalie, who always had a very difficult time accepting the wolves and getting over their less than appealing scent, loved Seth. Of course my Seth was hard not to love. We spent a little time with them before Jake and Nessie suggested we take the time to go get Seth settled at their house.

We walked in and Jake carried Seth's bags straight up to the room that they had gotten ready for him. Their house was smaller than the mansion like main house, but it was still pretty large with four bedrooms. Nessie and Jake and placed Seth in the farthest room from their own that they could manage and I kind of snickered under my breath wondering who's privacy they had in mind more.

Jake turned after putting the suitcases on the very large king size bed and winked at me as he left saying. "I'll leave you two to get settled."

Seth looked around approvingly at the room that they had provided for him. It was very large, the second largest bedroom in the house. It was dark and warm full of cherry furniture and dark bronze curtains and a matching down comforter adorned the bed. The walls were painted in a very calming taupe and held a few beautiful forest scenes captured on oil paintings in gilded frames and on the far side of the room he had his own bathroom with a Jacuzzi tub. I had stayed in this room a time or two when Jake decided to go with the boys on a hunting trip so Nessie didn't have to be here alone.

"Lucky…this bed is the most comfortable bed I've ever slept in!" I told him as I sat on the edge remembering the nights I had spent here.

"Stayed in here before have you?" he replied with a flirty wink.

"Yeah, a time or two when Jake went hunting with the boys I kept Ness company." I added matter of factly. "It was the best night's sleep I ever had until last night." I added with a smile.

He smiled back and he came over and pushed the suitcase out of the way to sit next to me on the bed. He put his arm left arm around me and pulled me close taking my right hand from my lap with his free hand and then turned to look at our reflection in the large dressing table that sat against the far wall across from us. My eyes widened, as I took in the scene of the two of us side by side. I almost didn't recognize myself by his side, my face glowing in a way I had never seen before, I couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was, but I just looked, at peace. His face was filled with the same look and he smiled at me with that now familiar twinkle in his eyes. We were sort of like Nessie and Jake in the fact that we looked so different his skin, hair, and eyes dark and exotic looking while I was much paler and freckled, with light eyes, and thanks to the highlights, light hair. We looked totally opposite and yet complimentary at the same time.

"Wow, would you look at that?" Seth finally said lifting our hands to point at the mirror. "You are so beautiful."

I frowned at my reflection not seeing what he seemed to be seeing. Other than the peacefulness, which had now been shattered by my skepticism, I looked as plain as always. _I guess love really is blind._ I thought as I shrugged giving up on trying to understand. Then I noticed that he was frowning at me and I turned to look into his eyes.

"You really don't believe me do you? How can you not see it?" He asked in frustration.

"Can't see what's not there" I sighed. "I think you're suffering from 'tunnel of love' vision myself."

He just shook his head staring at me in disbelief. I was tired of the subject and decided to go for a distraction.

"Well, let's get you unpacked. If we work together we can have you squared away in no time." I said looking back at the bags and over at the dresser that I was pretty sure was empty and awaiting his stuff.

He sat there still staring at me, a barrage of thoughts filing through his mind. Finally after what felt like a long while I heard him whisper, "Someday I'll make you see. Somehow I will." Then he appeared to shake out of his mental stupor and stood up to help me put his things away.

We had him squared away in no time and walked hand in hand back down to find Nessie and Jacob nuzzling in front of a fire in their living room. We settled ourselves on the brown leather couch across from where they were and cuddled up together as we stared quietly into the dancing orange and blue flames.

After a few minutes Seth interrupted the quiet as he looked over at the couple across from them. "Hey Ness, I was just wondering, how does that link between you and Jake work…you know the whole two way imagery thing?"

She shrugged, "We're not really sure, we were totally shocked the first time it happened. We never knew it was possible. It's only happened a few times. Why?"

"Have you ever tried to do it on purpose?" He said stitching together a plan in that beautiful head of his, although I had no clue what he had in mind.

"Yeah, but we've only been able to do it on purpose a time or two."

"I was wondering if you guys could help me do something."

"We could try." She said with interest.

I looked up at him questioningly and he smiled down at me. "Oh no, we'll work on this later. I want to surprise you."

"What on earth are you up to Seth Clearwater?"

He smiled down at me kissing me on my nose again. "Let's see if it works first and if it does then you'll find out."

We stayed a little longer at Jake and Nessie's and it started getting late. As much as I hated the fact that life had to go on even with Seth here, I knew that I had homework to do and school on Monday. I was so frustrated. How was I possibly supposed to go sit at school all day knowing that my Seth was sitting here at home waiting for me? At least the play was over, so I could come straight home after school. I tried to convince myself not to think about it since I had the whole day tomorrow with him before Monday rolled around. We slowly walked along the path that my brothers had cleared for me between Jake and Ness's house and ours hand in hand. Nobody really needed a path besides me; they were all accustomed to running in amongst the brush and brambles of the forest on a daily basis.

When we got back to the house we ate a quick supper and got settled in the dining room. Seth whipped out his laptop and did some work while I sat and did my homework. Of course the homework took about an hour longer than it should have because I kept getting sidetracked by Seth sitting across from me. There were several times when I could feel his gaze on me for long stretches too. We finally managed to accomplish our tasks, but I wasn't really sure how prudent trying to work on assignments in the same room would ultimately be.

As much as we hated to say goodbye, Seth finally left to go back to Jake and Nessie's so I could go to bed. We stood on the front porch a good half hour saying goodbye before he left though. I stumbled up to my room, sad to be sleeping alone tonight and feeling incredibly frustrated that Seth was less than a mile away from me instead of in the room with me. I knew it was necessary, but I still didn't like it. I finally drifted off to sleep after laying a long time in bed staring at the ceiling and replaying all of the events of the day in my mind. In some ways it still felt very much like a fantastic dream that just couldn't be real, but I knew that it was. I rolled over on my stomach in the place where Seth had slept all night and inhaled his scent that still lingered in my bed sheets and sighed finally drifting off to sleep.


	44. Chapter 44

**44. The Power of Projection**

I woke up the next morning to find Seth sitting in the rocker on the far side of the room smiling at me deviously and looking a tad bit tired.

"Good morning chatterbox."

I buried my head in the bed as I moaned in embarrassment, when I looked up Seth was sitting a little straighter in his seat with a strained look on his face. I laughed lightly, not sure what the expression was about and then asked almost afraid to hear the answer, "So what did I say this time?"

His face was blank for a moment and then he shook it off with a smile sneaking back across his face. "You were mostly mumbling my name and saying something about too many compliments."

I rolled my eyes as I sat up in my bed stealing a glance at my alarm clock and stretched raising my arms in a "y" above my head as I arched my back and rolled my neck in an attempt to get my muscles to loosen up. I looked back up in time to see Seth get up from his rocker and walk to the door.

"Where you going?" I asked a bit surprised.

"I'm going to go and let you get dressed." He said glancing back at me quickly. "I'll meet you downstairs when you're ready."

I rushed to get ready and ran downstairs to see as much of Seth as soon as possible. I didn't plan on wasting a single minute of my time with him, but as I walked downstairs I didn't see Seth anywhere.

Before I had a chance to ask Edward walked up to me and asked me to follow him. He led me into the living room for some perceived privacy. "He had to go for a run Lina." He finally answered my mental question and then continued in answer to the one that immediately followed.

"Let's just put it this way, Jake needed to do a lot of running in those two years between Nessie reaching maturity and when they were allowed to advance their relationship." He finally replied raising his eyebrows.

My eyes widened in understanding and then squinted in confusion. What did I do? I didn't do anything but wake up and talk to him.

Edward leaned in closer to answer my question with as much discretion as possible, "It only took an innocent moan into your bed and a morning stretch."

I gasped as I realized. It never occurred to me even for a second that such normal things could create _issues _for him. Heat flooded my face and I couldn't bear to meet Edward's gaze again. He laughed lightly, "Lina, it's okay. You didn't do anything on purpose and well these things are bound to happen. You two will learn to deal and cope. That's what he's doing now…he's coping…which is good."

I nodded in dazed agreement and made my way into the dining room taking a glass of orange juice from Alice's offering hand as I passed. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Emmett open his mouth ready to toss out a typical taunt when he was landed with thee simultaneous blows, one from Rose's hand across the back of his head, one from Alice's shoe that had come sailing from behind me in the kitchen to nail him square in the chest, and one from Edward's elbow in his side. The shock on Emmett's face was so hilarious that I burst out in loud coughing laughter as the sip of orange juice I had just taken spewed across the room in an orange spray. Now everyone was laughing. I turned to grab a towel from the kitchen but Alice was already there cleaning up the mess. I took my seat at the table and began to eat my breakfast that was waiting for me, feeling a little better after the comedic relief.

It was only a couple of minutes later that Seth walked in curious about the laughter that he had heard all the way out in the forest. He laughed at my detailed recount of the event leaving out the subject upon which Emmett was about to comment. I looked up at him feeling bad for the problems I was causing him, but he just smiled down at me in typical sweet Seth fashion. A few seconds later Alice appeared at our sides putting a plate with three times the amount of food as my own held in front of Seth with a smile. He thanked her and began to eat enthusiastically…I guess running really amps up the appetite.

When we were all finished we took our plates to the sink and washed them up and Seth turned to me with excitement in his eyes pulling me by the hand toward the front door.

"Come on, put your shoes on, I want to go back to Nessie and Jake's. There's something we have to show you!"

I put my shoes on as quickly as possible as Seth fidgeted impatiently by the front door. He was obviously very excited for whatever he wanted to show me. As soon as my shoes were on he had my hand again practically dragging me off the porch and out to the trail. It wasn't until I tripped over a log that was at the opening of the trail that he finally realized that he was moving a little too quickly for me and slowed down letting me set the pace as he walked next to me holding hands as we chatted.

Finally I turned to him after a few minutes and asked, "So did you have a good run?"

"Edward clue you in?" he said blushing slightly.

"Yup." My blush matched his own.

"Not your fault you know. Most people stretch when they first wake up, but I couldn't keep my mind in check. I needed to go clear my head."

"Oh, I understand. I really do, I just feel kind of bad is all. I know it's hard enough. It never occurred to me."

"Well, it probably wouldn't to most people…myself included if I hadn't been on the viewing end of the situation."

"Edward sort of suggested that we need to figure out our own ways to deal. I was thinking maybe we need some sort of code to hint at each other when something is an issue so that we can help each other know what to be careful of in the future or to stop while in public without everyone else knowing exactly what we mean."

"What like 'caw'?"

I laughed…I was thinking something a little less obvious, but basically yeah.

He laughed too and then he turned to me as we stood still staring at one another in the muted light of the shade. "How about we keep it weather related, that usually seems like a pretty innocuous thing to bring up in conversation. Like mentioning something about it being sunny or what time the sun will be rising or setting and then we'll know and yet nobody else would really notice."

"Unless it's night time…" I said with a laugh.

He smiled back, "Well that would be when you would bring up the sun setting."

I thought about it a minute. "I guess that could work, makes sense…the sun has a _warming_ effect and it's a pretty common topic. If it doesn't work we can always think up something new."

We laughed as we joked about the sun shining for the next few minutes as we continued along the path. We were almost to Jake's house when I stopped him again.

"Hey Seth, do you think that I could see you phased sometime? I'd like to see you in wolf form in person."

He smiled at me, "Sure, I'll even give you a ride if you want."

I laughed at the idea of me riding Seth like a horse. "We'll see."

We finally broke free of the trees and Seth's excitement mounted again as he reverted again to dragging me across the lawn. When I almost tripped a second time he turned and swept me up in his arms running the last little bit up to the front door. I laughed at the exhilaration of wind in my hair as we ran.

"Impatient are we?" I finally giggled as he sat me on my feet again in front of the front door as he knocked.

His smile was wide as he answered excitedly, "You'll understand why in a second."

Nessie opened the door looking nearly as excited as Seth. They pulled me in and set me down on the brown leather couch. Jake was already there looking nearly as excited as the other two. I just looked at them all like they were insane as they all started talking at once leaving me unable to make out what any of them were saying.

Finally Seth sat down next to me taking my hand and focused my attention on him and him alone. There was another fire burning in the fireplace and the lights that danced on his face made him even more mesmerizing than ever.

"We didn't get any sleep at all last night sweetheart. We were working on this all night and it worked!"

They didn't get any sleep? No wonder they were all acting like lunatics! I laughed a little and then what he said began to sink in and I was totally confused. "What worked?"

"My idea involving Nessie and Jake…you know about how they can sometimes send stuff two ways?" I was still confused as Seth sighed. "You know, like how you saw and felt me through Nessie's vision because it had filtered through from Jake." Understanding lit my face and he was finally relieved to see I was on the same page.

"Well last night we tried to do it on purpose and it worked. Jake and I phased and I showed him all of these things that I want to share with you to help you understand and then Jake and Ness worked all night and they did it. Ness was able to pull it all from Jake's mind and now she can share it with you!" he was so excited he was practically bouncing like a kangaroo in his seat. I just stared for a moment trying to absorb what he was saying. Suddenly it all made sense I turned my saucer sized eyes toward Nessie who smiled practically bouncing with excitement in her own seat across from me. A huge smile stole across my face as I looked back at Seth who was so excited to be able to share so much with me that he never thought he would be able to do.

It only took a few minutes for us to get sorted and settled. Nessie sat next to me taking one of my hands while Seth sat holding my other and Jake watched excitedly from his seat across from me. Suddenly I no longer saw Jake, I was in a stark bedroom that I never saw before and experiencing a conversation on the phone. I heard my own voice coming from the receiver and Seth's voice answering back from my perspective. _It was the night that she found out she got the lead in the play. I could feel this strange sensation in my chest. I recognized it immediately as that feeling when you first realize you're attracted to someone, but you're afraid to do much about it. The view jumped through a few more conversations, each time the vibrations inside of my chest were changing and growing, there was more comfort there in the conversations and in direct correlation the tingle inside my chest became warmer and more defined. It had definitely evolved from mere attraction to a full blown crush._ I could feel myself smiling widely as the visions played through my mind. _The conversations continued and the feelings deepened steadily with each call… Everyone else called her Lina, but it wasn't accurate, she should be called Angel because that's what she was._

_Then there was one where I felt like someone had kicked me in the chest. I heard my Angel talking about her date with Connor at a valley of gold. My heart sinking as I tried to encourage the girl on the other end of the line that Connor was going to want to kiss her on their first group date. The sickeningly painful feeling of running through the forest trying to escape the thoughts of my Angel looking so unbearably beautiful in the arms of another guy, kissing that guy, letting that guy hold her hand. I lean back and let loose a painful mourning howl into the night, trying anything I can to shake the unbearable pain._

_I saw myself looking through the box of stuff I had unearthed from the garage looking through the random items as I come across a CD that had obviously belonged to Leah. I put it in the player and froze as I heard the first song begin. My heart tightened as I listened to every word that seemed have flown straight out of my soul. It was exactly how I felt about my beautiful Angel._

_Suddenly my view shifted again back to the bedroom listening to my disembodied voice of my Angel cracking with the pain of rejection. I felt guilty for the rush of emotions: relief that I wasn't going to suffer through another night of knowing my Angel was in the arms of someone else, followed by the immediate pang of sympathy for the girl that I loved from afar. She started talking about the fear of being alone and never being loved and my heart sped. I knew she was wrong, I knew because I already loved her._

_I was anxiously awaiting a call from my Angel, my computer set up with my web cam running. I get the call and I can't answer fast enough. A few seconds later I'm gazing at the face of my Angel on the computer and I feel like I can't breathe. She blushes and my heart wants to explode. I get scared and talk her into small talk as I my hands shake uncontrollably and I pray that I don't get so anxious that I phase right here in front of the camera. She says something that gives me hope; I take a breath and ask her about it. Her answer gives me even more hope. I finally take one last deep breath and ask her hit play. A look of shock fills my angels face and my heart stops, then I see a smile and tears in her eyes. I let out my breath and suddenly feel my tears welling at the edges of my own eyes. I've never been so happy in my life as she tells me that she feels the same way._

_I'm in yet another boring meeting, wondering where my Angel is now. I get a text…she's sick. I can't breathe. I abruptly interrupt the pompous jerk talking in a monotone in front of me and rush into the reception area dialing the number as I run. My Angel sounds weak and frail. She's not well at all. I feel a lead ball form in my stomach. I hear she's tired so I tell her I have to get back to my meeting and get off the phone. I can't concentrate on anything but my sick Angel. I walk back in the room and apologize stating that there is a family emergency and hastily leave before the businessman can say another word. I call when I'm on the road between Vancouver and La Push. Esme sounds very concerned and I don't like it a bit. I call two more times and panic when the second call in interrupted by orders that an ice bath be drawn and news that my Angel is throwing up. I pace as I wait for Edward to call me back. An hour later I'm on speaker phone listening intently as Carlisle examines my poor Angel. I ask questions, questions that I should let her mother ask, but I can't hold myself back. Edward keeps interpreting for her, I just want to hear her voice, just once, but I can't. I'm going nuts. I want to hear from her. I pace the floors all night long, desperate to be at her side, but knowing I'll lose a major contract if I follow my instincts and catch the next flight out. Instead I go and assemble a care package and write her a note. I have to tell her and it can't wait until tomorrow. My Angel has to know now that I love her, completely and totally love her. I'm only able to finally sleep after I hear her weak and warbled voice tell me that she orders me to sleep. I smile lightly as I cuddle up to my pillow as ordered and pretend it's her. I dream of holding her in my arms and kissing her beautiful lips._

_I hear my text alert calling from next to me on the bed. I pick it up and read that she got my package. My heart stops as I speedily dial her number. I'm afraid to ask since she hasn't brought it up yet, but I finally ask if she read the note. She asks if I mean it? How could she question it? How could she ever question it? She tells me that she loves me too and I come flying out of my bed at the sound of her words. I'm shaking in joy, trying to keep from phasing right there in my bedroom. The second we hang up the phone I climb through my bedroom window, not having the patience to even walk through the house and phase running the fastest I can, the freedom of the feeling, the joy of my heart making me feel like I'm soaring even more. SHE LOVES ME!!_

I feel myself crying on the couch as I tighten my grip on Seth's hand and he tightens his right back.

_My plane is landing at the airport. I can't wait to get off, can't wait to see my Angel. Edward is laughing at me as I prance and dance around, too excited to stand still. Jasper laughs too and tells me that I'm going to make him high on excitement if I'm not careful. I'm standing at the window waiting excitedly for my Angel to arrive. I can't wait to surprise her, to see the smile on her face when she sees that I'm here. I hear a car and my breath stops then it starts again as I'm disappointed to see that it's Rosalie and Nessie. Edward places a hand on my shoulder and smiles comfortingly. Rosalie and Ness run in saying that my Angel will be right behind them. Everyone congregates in the living room excited to see too. My Angel pulls up and steps out of her car and suddenly I can't move. I can't think. I can't breathe. I can't look away. I will never be able to look away again. In all of my life, I will never ever see anything more beautiful, more precious, more important to me than this heavenly creature standing in front of me. A true honest to God Angel dropped down from heaven just for me to love and take care of. I take a few steps and find I'm being drawn to her like a magnet, like a ten foot thick steel cable is anchored to my heart and pulling me toward God's Angel. I step down from the porch and freeze as she looks up and sees me. Her eyes are twinkling toward me like two shining emeralds and I can't move, I can't breathe. She stares back for a fraction of a second and then suddenly she drops her bag with a smile on her face and bounds into MY arms…MY ARMS! She nestles herself in my neck and I turn burying my face in her hair and taking a deep gulp of her scent. The fact that it's mixed with the vampire scent that can overwhelm us at times doesn't faze me at all, she smells as heavenly as she looks and feels. My insides melt to my toes as I know that I am home. She is home and for the rest of my life, as long as I'm with her, I'll be happy._

_I'm terrified as I start to tell her that I imprinted on her. I see panic in her eyes as she assumes incorrectly that I imprinted on someone else…as if that would ever in a million lifetimes be possible. My fear is replaced with irrevocable joy as she finally reaches up and wipes away the tears that are flowing down me cheeks and gently kisses my lips sending a shot of electricity through my whole body from my head to my toes and the tips of my fingers and whispers the most wonderful words I have ever heard "I love you with all of my heart." I sweep her in my arms and kiss her with all of the love and passion in my heart. I pick her up and spin her around kissing her over and over._

_We're sitting on the wall at the valley of gold. She feels so amazing in my arms, my missing puzzle piece that I never knew was missing before she entered my life. We kiss and kiss and kiss once more the passion welling inside my soul is so strong that before I know what I've done I've swept her into my arms, my eyes burning into her with desire and carry her to the hood of her car and sit her there. Before I make another move she's enveloped me in her arms and legs pulling me in to kiss me with a passion that blurs my mind beyond reason. I start to kiss the cheeks and neck of my Angel when she pulls back laughing and covers her neck. At first I freeze in fear and then the realization hits that she's ticklish. I love that she's ticklish…it makes for good flirting. We finally begin to kiss again and my hands suddenly have a mind of their own roaming on her back and sides and then a finger accidentally slips under the edge of her shirt. I hadn't intended to do that, but it stoked the fire in my body, as it seemed to do with her as well as her kiss became even more intense. I feel like I'm about to spontaneously combust with joy and desire when she suddenly pulls away looking frightened. My heart freezes mid beat as the fear returns that I had crossed a line and upset her._

_I gaze at my precious Angel, she's so embarrassed that she's so inexperienced, but so am I. I've only ever dated a handful of girls and of those only kissed a couple and those kisses were nothing in the universe near what the slightest peck from my Angel was to me. We agree to keep things cool for now and work up slowly._

_It's dark and I'm gazing down as the beautiful face of my Angel in the moonlight. I can't believe how blessed I am to have such a sweet, beautiful, smart, caring woman for my life mate. She stirs in her sleep and then says my name. She mumbles a few more times and then I can't help but laugh a little as she begs my sister not to kill her. She jerks at my laughter and I'm afraid to move for fear of waking her further. Suddenly she begins to run her right hand, which had been perched by her face up until now back and forth on my chest giving me chills. When she first rises slightly toward me I think that she was awoken by my laughter, but then I see that her eyes are still closed. In the dark of the night in her precious dreams she stretches up and finds my lips with her own. I freeze not sure how to respond when her kiss deepens in intensity. I grab hold of the edge of the bed to restrain myself as she pulls herself nearly on top of me in order to take my face in her hands and increase the intensity of a kiss that I had no idea could be any more intense than it already was. My resolve was just about to dissolve completely when to my great relief and simultaneous disappointment she slides back down to her place on my chest with a contented sigh. I lie there for a moment and then finally decide that I need to leave the room and go for a run immediately or risk breaking my promise on the first night. I slide out from under the precious Angel that now not only has my heart but also my body in knots._

_I wake up to find my Angel still in my arms where I had returned her to after returning from my run and sliding back next to her where I had passed out immediately. We talk briefly and I tell her a few details from the night before to her horror, then we curl together facing one another and I know that whatever hardships I face in trying to keep my promise, it will forever be worth every ounce of difficulty in order to have her be mine, forever._

The scene disappears from in front of my eyes and I find that Seth is now kneeling in front of me. Both of our faces are tear stained and he's holding my hand looking deep into my eyes. I unwittingly dive into his arms and kiss him with all the strength and passion I can muster. We should both be shouting something about the sunshine, but in this moment neither of us wanted to stop. I felt the need to show him exactly how much I loved him back, wishing I had a way to show him my feelings as vividly as he had just managed to share his own with me. The laughter of Nessie and Jake behind us finally pulled me out of my passionate stupor as I realized that I had literally tackled Seth and was laying on top of him on the floor. I looked at his face, which was glowing below me on the floor as I bit my lip and whispered "Oops…sorry" again. We both laughed and then got up from the floor and cuddled back up on the couch. The rest of the day I couldn't bring myself to look away from my Seth. Jake and Nessie left to go to the main house and give us some privacy as we cuddled on the couch looking at each other and finally drifting off to sleep together in the soft glow of the fireplace.


	45. Chapter 45

**45. My Seth Charming**

I woke up the next morning to the shock of finding myself alone in my bed at the main house. I couldn't believe that I was sleeping so soundly that I could be carried the mile from Jake and Nessie's house to mine without ever waking up. It was scary how hard I must sleep that someone could literally carry me off and I never even know it. It was also scary how much I was missing Seth already. I guess it really was true that the imprinting thing works both ways because I felt uncomfortable being away from him also.

I got up and rushed my way through getting ready thinking that I would stop by Jake and Nessie's to see Seth before going to school. There was no way I was going to make it through a whole day of school without seeing him first. I rushed downstairs to grab some food before making the short trip and was overjoyed to find that Seth was already there waiting with a plate full of pancakes in his hands.

"Morning my beautiful Angel," he said with a smile. He had started using his nickname with me after I told him how sweet I thought it in the vision Nessie had shown me of his memories. It never failed to make me smile, reminding me of how sweet and amazing my Seth was. "Have breakfast with me before school?"

I threw my finger to my mouth as I pretended to contemplate his offer with a mischievous smile as I let out a small "hmmm" and then let the smile spread wide across my face as I ran over and jumped to my toes to plant a kiss on his cheek as I took the plate out of his hands. He wrapped his arms around my waist giving me a big hug and then followed me to the dining room where a glass of juice and a complete place setting was already waiting. The ground floor appeared to be family free again this morning.

I slowly ate my breakfast, relishing every second I got to spend with my Seth before the agonizingly long school day worth of separation that I was about to face. We sat and talked and laughed our way through breakfast, but all too soon it was time to go to school. Seth walked me out to my car and kissed me telling me that he would miss me and then opened the door for me to get in.

As I pulled away from him and drove toward the main highway I fought the empty feeling that I had inside me. It almost felt like I had an invisible bungee cord tied around my midsection trying to pull me back home, back to my Seth. I fought the urge to cry as I turned and made my way toward the large brick building that would be my prison for the day. I laughed as the irony of that thought struck me. Two months ago it was my freedom, my step out into the real world, but now it was the confining obligation that kept me from being where I wanted to be. Rationally I knew that this was partially due to the fact that Seth being here was so new and a part of me was still afraid the he would disappear like a mirage on the horizon of my mind. Unfortunately understanding why you're feeling a certain way and actually adjusting that attitude are two entirely different things and the deep longing in my core refused to let up in the face of rational thought.

I made my way through the day, wishing it would hurry up and hit three o'clock already. The only fun part of the day was the reaction of my friends when they heard that the infamous Seth was actually in town. I showed them pictures that I had taken on my cell phone and told them about some of the things we had done since.

Leighton's eyes bulged as she looked at the pictures on my cell again during lunch. "Oh my God Lina, you _so_ didn't tell us he was this hot!"

Lucas frowned slightly behind her but then went back to his attempts to ignore the conversation.

"Yeah, I know! He's hot and he's all mine!" I said with a goofy grin and a dramatic lift of my eyebrows.

"Let me see that!" Malia interrupted grabbing the phone out of Leighton's hands. "Holy Crap! You guys have to be the most adorable couple I've ever seen. Just look at how he looks at you!" She exclaimed as she looked at a picture that Nessie had snuck in of us looking at each other over our lunches on Sunday.

Riley stole a glance over her shoulder, intrigued by the couple that Malia seemed to think were so perfect. He didn't seem jealous like Lucas had, just merely interested.

Connor laughed from his place across the table. "Yeah, the way she talks about him, you'd think he was a prince or something. The girl is totally head over heels for this dude. I'm looking forward to meeting him."

"Wait," Leighton said with a confused look as she stole the phone back from Malia, "didn't you say this guy was nearly thirty?" That was something I had to figure out a quick cover for some time ago when Connor remembered me saying the same thing. I quickly crafted as stupid lie about him really being twenty and that I had just said that he acted thirty…which wasn't even true…it was actually more the other way around.

"Leighton, do you really think my parents would let me date a thirty year old?" She shrugged. "Please! They hardly like the fact that he's a twenty year old! I just said he acts like he's thirty." After years of practice I had gotten pretty good at making the cover stories seem convincing…that is once I had time to wrap my own head around it.

"Hmm..." she said looking at the picture again. "He doesn't even really look that." Then she smiled up at me again. "You two are really cute together though…when do we get to meet him?"

"Soon I hope, but I really don't know for sure. To be honest you guys were the LAST thing on my mind this weekend." I replied with a wink and the girls giggled.

The last half of the day was beginning to feel like some cruel form of torture. I stole glances at my phone under my desk every chance I could get to look at the pictures stored there as I kept a minute-by-minute countdown throughout the rest of the day. When the final bell rang I ran to my locker and literally sprinted out to my car, knocking down a couple of tiny freshmen as I ran. I burst through the sophomore hall doors while rummaging in my bag to dig out my keys as I ran and looked up halfway out to my car to see Seth leaning against the rear fender with his arms crossed over his chest and his legs crossed at his ankles smiling at me. Alice appeared to have gotten a hold of him because he was dressed in a pair of dark blue designer jeans, a light blue v-neck sweater that clung to his toned physique very nicely, a pair of brown boots, and was sporting a fresh haircut. He looked so sexy standing there I couldn't help but have a reflexive little chill. I squealed a small screech when I saw him and increased my speed for the last few feet that separated us and jumped into his now outstretched arms. I wrapped my legs around him and gave him a long kiss. After a minute or so, I started feeling the stares around me, but I didn't care.

"I missed you SO much!" I yelled kissing him on the cheek one last time before he sat me down.

"I missed you too Angel." He said smiling down at me with a small wink. I bit my lip with a crooked smile as his use of his nickname for me once again sent the memories flooding my mind. Then he pointed behind me at my friends coming toward us. He recognized them from the pictures he had seen from homecoming night.

When they finally reached us both of the girls had glazed happy looks as they took in all that was my Seth. The boys had to look up a little at him too, but their expressions were a little more leery.

"Hi Everybody, I'd like you all to meet Seth!" I said pointing up to him, my face beaming, as he reached around my waist from behind and hugged me close to him. They all mumbled a "hi Seth." I placed my hands on top of his on my waist for a second and then started the other side of the introductions.

I pointed to each one as I named them off. It seemed that the crowd had grown during the initial part of the introductions. After I was done Seth raised his hand and smiled his typical warm happy go lucky Seth smile and said "Hi Everybody" with his usual enthusiasm. Everyone smiled back somewhat genuinely. I giggled slightly as I realized that nobody was immune to my Seth's innate charms.

We all stood around talking for a few minutes as Seth continued to hold me in his arms with his chin resting on my head and later my shoulder. The boys talked cars with him while the girls started plotting for a quadruple date, if Connor could find someone to take along that is. I glanced over at him to see his eyes fall to the ground. My heart went out to him. I really wished that he could find somebody that could make him happy or that Leighton would see how he felt about her if that was what was meant to happen. Either way, I didn't like seeing him alone and hurting still.

Finally the subject arose that I was dreading. Someone asked how long Seth was planning on sticking around, knowing that the original plan was for a visit over Thanksgiving and then he was going to return home. Seth was thankfully quite smooth as always.

"Actually, I had been considering moving this way for a while. There are lots of opportunities for work in my field out of New York and I really miss being around the Cullens and the Blacks. I'm actually looking for a place now if you know of any around here."

They all looked a bit stunned for a second and then snapped out of it and began suggesting places that they knew of in the area for rent. I looked up at him with a big smile. He was so genuine that nobody questioned his motives. He looked down at me with that twinkle I loved so much and kissed me on the nose. I rested my head back against his chest as we listened for a while.

We ended up being there nearly an hour talking to the kids after school. I didn't mind, my rush was to get back to Seth, so as long as I had him here, I could have stayed at school all day and all night. When we finally got into my car, I started the engine as Seth reached over to give me another sweet gentle kiss.

"I really did miss you today."

"Me too…it was torture of the cruelest kind being trapped in there all day knowing you were at home." I whined.

He kissed me on the nose again, "Well we're together now…what do you want to do my Angel?"

I gave him another devious smile with a wink and threw the car in reverse and then sped through the gears as I made my way back to the valley of gold. It was the one place that we had privacy and I never got tired of the view.

Twenty minutes after leaving the school we were sitting on the retaining wall looking at the view of the valley again, my body comfortably tucked into Seth's warm arms. We were all alone today as usual as we looked at the distant waterfall drift like a blue ribbon down the face of the distant cliff.

"So, have you ever gotten to see your waterfall close up?" Seth finally asked gazing at the distant cliff face.

"No, it's got to be a good ten mile hike from here and there are no trails that I've been able to find so far."

"Trails schmails…we don't need no stinking trails." Seth said looking over at me with a devious twinkle in his eyes.

"Well ten miles is a long way to hike without any trails sweetie. I'm not really that great of a hiker either."

"What makes you think you'll be doing any of the walking?" He asked with a cute little eyebrow waggle.

I looked at him a bit perplexed for a moment until the realization dawned…"You mean?"

"Wanna go for a wolf ride my dear?"

A wide excited smile broke across my face as he pulled me up from my perch on the wall and began leading me toward the embankment that led down to the valley. At the edge of the woods he told me to stand there and wait until he barked for me to come in. He would have to strip out of his clothes to keep from destroying them before phasing and then lay down so that I could climb up.

I waited a few seconds and then I heard my cue. I cautiously wandered into the brush…bracing myself to see Seth's wolf form. A few feet into the woods I stepped past a large oak tree to see my massive tan wolf lying on the forest floor with a curious eye on my face. I slowly walked over and gently ran my hand across the fur of his back. He let out a little purr like sound and a shiver, which led me to believe it felt good. I ran my hand back up to his face and along his muzzle and back up to his ears. It was hard to reconcile the fact that this large tan creature was my Seth at first until he lifted his face to look into my eyes and there I saw it. My Seth's soul was peeking out at me through the large brown eyes flecked with green that were set within of the mound of fur in front of me. I smiled and reached my arms around his neck as I kissed right below his ear and he nuzzled against me. Then I went back to his back and pulled myself up to sit precariously between his shoulder blades.

"How am I supposed to hold on? Will it hurt you to grab your fur?"

My wolf Seth shook his head back and forth to let me know it didn't hurt. I pulled two handfuls of his velvety soft fur into my hands and held on for dear life as he stood. I felt as though I were riding bareback on a large horse rather than a wolf. He started off slowly toward the falls, allowing me to get a feel for the rhythm of his gait. As I became more confident in my ability to stay on he picked up the pace. The wind was cold against my face and neck so I leaned down, laying against his back and grasping on to tufts of fur around his neck. He laughed a little as he really picked up the pace transforming the scenery around us into a green blur. I laughed as the speed began to exhilarate me as be bounded over downed trees and large creek beds that snaked back and forth along our path. It almost felt like I was flying. After about twenty minutes I could feel him slow and then he stopped and slowly walked a few steps further to a clearing large enough for him to lay down where I slid back off of his back laughing.

"That was amazing! I've never felt anything like it…well personally at least. I did get the glimpse from Ness showing me your memories. It must be wonderful to be able to run like that." I said as I softly scratched behind his ears absentmindedly as he leaned into my touch.

He looked over at me with his mouth open in what was quite obviously a huge grin. The stood again nudging me from behind with his nose. I could hear the raging rumble of the flowing water, but I still couldn't see it. I took a few more steps and suddenly I was in a huge clearing at the base of the waterfall. The spray floated toward me from the large pool of water that had been carved at the base of the waterfall from innumerable years of constant battering creating a rainbow above my head that was not visible from the distant overlook. I stood there in awe staring at what could only be described as a small piece of paradise.

"Oh, Thank you for brining me here Seth. It's even more beautiful than I ever imagined!" I exclaimed unable to rip my gaze from the beautiful haze of the spray. I could hear Seth sigh beside me as he gently laid his head on my shoulder. I reached my hand under his head and gently ran my fingers up and down the far side of his muzzle.

A few minutes later he curled up on the ground behind me and let out a soft whine. I went over and sat next to him, laying back against his side and resting my head on his back so that I could look up at the view above me. I could feel his heart beating in his chest as the giant wolf let out a contented sigh at the same moment as me.

"This is amazing Seth, but I wish I would have thought to bring along your clothes in my backpack so that you could phase back and sit with me in human form. It'd be nice to be able to make out a little here." I added with a giggle.

He let out a sort of low coughing sound that I recognized as a laugh of his own and then turned to lick my face. I made a face and wiped it off with an "Ewww" which was greeted with a louder laugh.

"I wouldn't have been fond of that in your human form either for future reference." I told him as I continued wiping at my wet cheek. He rolled his large eye at me as he laughed a little longer and then we returned to our quiet viewing.

We sat in that clearing for the longest time before the sunlight began to fade and we realized we had to make our way back to the car. After letting me get to my feet Seth stood up and looked at me. I reached up and scratched behind his ear again as he leaned back into my hand.

With a crooked smile and a wink I said, "Well, next time we're definitely bringing your clothes with us."

He chuckled his deep wolf laugh once more and then moved to a space next to a downed log and laid down providing me an easier way to clamber back onto his back. This time I chose to lay down immediately as I whispered in his ear "Okay baby, make me fly!" He looked back with a wink of his large eye and took off back into the dense undergrowth of the forest. I laughed and cheered as he pushed even harder on the way back to the road, my head becoming dizzy from the speed and wind whipping past my face.

We reached the far side of the valley in a little under fifteen minutes and I returned to the car after leaving Seth in the forest to phase back and get dressed. A few minutes later he walked out of the woods with the widest smile I had ever seen and sauntered straight over to me wrapping his arms around my waist and planting a long sweet kiss on my lips. When he pulled back he was smiling.

"A wolf girl all the way! You were cracking me up the way you were whooping and hollering back there!"

"It was amazing Seth! Seriously, I've never felt anything like it!" I tipped up on my toes and wrapped my arms around his neck and scratching my fingertips through the hair at the nape of his neck.

He shivered a little and looked at me with a curious expression, "How did you know to do that by the way?"

"What?"

"Exactly the best places to scratch? It was like you were hitting the most relaxing sweet spot every time?"

I shrugged, "I dunno. Instinct I guess. I just did what felt right."

"Well, it felt amazing. It was so…comforting. There are very few times in my wolf form that I have ever felt _at ease_. It was really nice." He said as he leaned forward and kissed my forehead. I smiled at him and we stood there looking into each other's eyes for a long time.

As the last of the sun left the sky we got in my car and headed home. Seth called ahead from the road. They were relieved to hear from us. To spite the fact that I was with wolf protection, they still weren't very fond of not knowing where I was all of the time. The more time that Alice spent around Seth, I knew that she would eventually begin to be able to see more and more as her familiarity with him grew, just as it eventually did with Jacob and Ness, but for now I was practically lost from her visions when in the company of Seth and that left everyone concerned. I could hear Seth's end of the conversations as he got an earful from Edward on the other end of the phone.

"I'm sorry Edward, we didn't think." "Yes Edward, I understand." "Ok, we'll be there soon. I think we're about ten minutes out now." "Alright, and I'll say it again, I'm really sorry, sometimes when we're together, we sort of forget our manners. We should have called and I'm sorry."

I had a feeling that I wasn't going to enjoy the family meeting that was most assuredly waiting us when we got home.


	46. Chapter 46

**46. The Cruelest of Punishments**

In all of the years I had lived with the Cullens, I had never been in so much trouble. I'm not sure how much of it was due to the fact that I had never had the freedom to make such poor choices in order to get into trouble, or more the fact that I was now old enough that the trouble I could get into would have a far greater impact on the rest of my life. It didn't help matters that they had been trying to call all evening, but it seems that cell signals were non-existent in the valley and so we were blissfully unaware. They finally got so frantic that they set out in search of possible places we would go and found my car abandoned at the overlook and searching for our scents discovered that Seth had gone into the forest and his scent indicated that he had phased and I followed shortly after. They pieced the puzzle together and chose not to follow since the neatly folded pile of Seth's clothes indicated that we were not in jeopardy.

Seth and I sat and listened to my family take turns reading us the right act for our 'antics' of the evening for a good hour or more before it culminated in our punishment. Well, technically it was my punishment since I was the minor child in their care, but it was every bit as much a punishment for Seth if not more. I was grounded for an entire week, Seth was not allowed to come over or even cross over the property line from Jake and Nessie's house.

Seth and I were both heartbroken as we were allowed one last goodnight kiss before a week's worth of agonizing separation. We both cried as we kissed one another good night and kept apologizing to each other, both trying to take all responsibility for the lack in judgment.

The next few days were complete and total agony. It hurt to be away from him so much. The emptiness I felt when I had to leave him to go to school that first morning hit again full force the second he turned to walk away from me and would not let go. Everybody tried to ignore my atypical brooding demeanor as I would wander around the house going through all of the motions, but not really being there at the same time. Anytime I would walk into a room that Edward or Jasper was in they would look up at me with worried expressions that didn't leave their faces until I had left the room again. By Friday even Emmett was feeling the heaviness and complaining that I needed to snap out of it. All I could do was look at him with half dead eyes and grunt a little and walk back up to my room.

It was two a.m. Saturday morning when I awoke to hear the voices of my family in the living room below. Their discussion must have gotten a little heated because it was rare for them to talk in a voice loud enough to be heard in my bedroom.

"Edward, this is ridiculous. In her entire life, I've never seen her like this."  
"I know Jasper, but at the same time, they need to learn to be more careful. Yes Seth's a wolf, but he can only protect her from so much. If any more than a coven of two were to cross their path, he wouldn't be powerful enough to keep her safe."

"Listen guys," I heard Jake's voice growl into the night, "I'm telling you, this is not healthy for them. You all have mates that you hate to be away from, but it's not the same as with an imprint. Take how much you guys feel lost without your mate and multiply that by about a thousand. Knowing that they're so close to one another but can't be with each other is just too difficult for either of them, especially with the bond being so new."

"She's our kid, Dog…we get to raise her the way that we think is best. You need to butt out!" Rosalie snarled from her seat across the room.

"So you expect me to believe that you really don't care that she's hurting? That they're both hurting? You may not care for me much Blondie, but you like Seth, you're telling me that you don't care that he's so lost without her that he's been holed up in his room for the past four days and I can barely even get him to eat?"

My cheeks were wet with the tears that flowed for my poor Seth, all alone in his room. I was so lost in my own sadness; I hadn't taken the time to really picture what he was going through. I fought to keep my sobs from becoming audible. Thankfully they were so focused on their conversation that they hadn't seemed to notice that I was awake and eavesdropping.

"What?" my father and mother asked suddenly quite concerned.

"Yeah well, if you guys haven't noticed, she hasn't been eating much either." Alice's musical voice interceded. "I've been keeping a close eye on her and she's just been pushing the food around her plate mostly and not eating much at all, and at school she hasn't even been trying to put on a show that she's eating. She's been getting a pass to go sit in the library the whole time."

Silence filled the room. "Why didn't you mention this sooner?" My mother finally spoke up from her place near my father.

"I tried, but nobody was interested in listening besides Jasper. You just kept dismissing me and saying they'd survive."

"Bella, Nessie, we haven't heard much from you. What do you two think of all of this?" my father asked calmly.

"Well," Bella said after a brief pause, "I thought it was a tad rough to begin with. Considering what Renesmee has showed me in the past about how powerful the imprinting bond is and how easy it is to get totally wrapped up in your own little world once you've imprinted. What they did really didn't surprise me that much. I mean look how we are with our mates, and nobody would think twice about it if we disappeared for an afternoon like that to go for a run. I agreed that a punishment was prudent, but I had a feeling that this total separation thing would be very difficult for them both."

There was a long quiet again and then my father's voice asked so softly that I could hardly hear… "Ness? Why are you crying?"

His question was followed by a long drawn out silence. I strained to hear and then the realization hit me that Nessie was explaining her perspective using her gift. Finally I heard her voice faintly in the distance, "See, only Jake, Lina, and I could truly know what he feels for her because we all shared it in order to show it to her. Edward and Jasper usually get small glimpses, but it's almost like we lived it ourselves. He hasn't phased since he left Monday night or else I'm sure we could show you EXACTLY what he's feeling now, but I don't think that's really necessary do you?"

My sobs finally hitched in my throat as I was no longer able to hold them back. I hadn't cried in the past four days, afraid that if I started then I wouldn't be able to stop. Suddenly my family was aware that I was awake and a second later there was a soft knock at my door. My mother walked in and asked me since I was up anyway if I would come downstairs and join them. I got up and put on a robe. My vision was blurred by my tears as I followed my mother back down the stairs to the family room. I walked over to the one person in the room who I felt truly understood what I felt and melted into her waiting arms as I let the tears roll more freely now. Nessie stroked my hair and whispered that it would be okay.

My family all watched me, each one of their eyes filled with empathy. Finally my mother looked over at my father and whispered, "Carlisle, please."

My father got up and walked over to me and gently placed a finger under my chin and lifted my gaze up to meet his. It was so much softer than it had been Monday night.

"I'm sorry my darling. I believe we were a bit hasty in our anger and chose a far more cruel punishment than was really necessary." He then looked up at Nessie and Jake as he finished, "Take her to him."

I looked up with wide astonished eyes as I sniffed, "Now? Really?"

He smiled down at me. "It has been our punishment too love, and now I think we've all suffered enough. Go to him and spend the rest of the evening with him. I want you two to eat and try to rest, although I would ask that you stay in the living room please. We would like you to come back over first thing in the morning."

The first smile to cross my face in four days spread across my lips as I jumped up and threw my arms around my father, kissing him on the cheek. "Thank you Daddy!" He chuckled. I hadn't called him Daddy since I was eight or nine. I grabbed Nessie and Jake's hands and pulled them out the door toward the trail that joined our properties. I could hear my family's laughter from inside the house as I was suddenly no longer pulling, but being carried by Jake who had scooped me up to cradle me in his arms running as fast as his human form would allow.

Once we were inside the front door he sat me down and I sprinted up the stairs and down the hall to Seth's room. I didn't bother to knock. I opened the door to find him laying on his bed facing away from me curled into a ball and cuddled up to a pillow that he had draped the shirt I had sent to him via Nessie Tuesday morning so he could at least have my scent with him. He didn't even turn over to look at me.

"So am I so easily replaced Mr. Clearwater that you refuse to acknowledge my presence in favor of an extra fluffy pillow?"

His head shot around so quickly that I barely even saw the movement. His eyes were wide with surprise as he stared at me for a moment as though he dared not believe I was real. I ran over to him as he sat up in bed and I jumped up and into his arms. He pulled me close and buried his face in my hair taking in a deep breath. We held each other for a long time and finally we pulled away to face each other.

"What are you doing here? Your parents are going to kill you." He said with a look of horror stretching his face.

I laughed "Seth Clearwater, we desperately need to get some food in you so you can start thinking clearly again. Do you think in a million years that I could ever sneak out of _that _house without **someone** knowing what I was doing? They were sick of seeing us both living as zombies that they've given us a reprieve. I have orders to get you fed and for us to try to get some rest, but we're asked to keep it in the living room, and then they want us over first thing in the morning."

The look of disbelief and pain vanished from Seth's face and was replaced by a look of relief and joy. "You mean it's over? We're free?"

"I'm not sure 'free' is the right term," I said smiling, "but we can see each other again, so in that sense yes!"

He hugged me again tightly and taking my face in his hands gave me along, much awaited kiss. "I missed you so much Angel!"

"I missed you too sweetheart!" I said as I reached up and cupped his face into my hands this time and gave him another sweet kiss. Then I took him by the hand and led him downstairs where Jake and Nessie had already managed to assemble quite a buffet on the counter and then disappeared into the night. We had the house all to ourselves. We sat and stared into each other's eyes, unable to let go of the other's hands, as we ate at the counter and then moved to the couch where a fire was burning golden in the hearth waiting for us. We curled up on the couch together and I nestled my face into his neck and placed a few gentle kisses there before drifting off into delicious sleep.


	47. Chapter 47

**47. The Christmas Nazi**

We woke up a little later in the morning than we had expected. I guess it shouldn't have been surprising how much better and more soundly we slept when together. I hadn't slept so well since Sunday night. We made our way over to the main house about ten in the morning. Thankfully, my family understood that we were both completely exhausted and had made it over as soon as we woke up.

This discussion was far more diplomatic this time. We were given a few typical teen age relationship ground rules. I now had to call and check in before going off with Seth on an unscheduled excursion. I had a curfew of midnight unless I had express permission to extend that time and/or had family members with us. The term curfew was extended beyond a time that I had to be home by, but also included the stipulation that Seth had to be gone by that time. I was a little frustrated considering that Edward spent every night in Bella's room and watched her sleep from very early on in their relationship, but they also had some barriers to physical intimacy that we didn't, so I also understood in a way…but I still didn't like it. There would be a few exceptions to the Seth part of the curfew rule, but they would be few and far between.

The new rules were annoying, but as long as we weren't being kept apart totally, we were willing to deal with anything. Seth could always be counted on to be waiting for me downstairs when I got up in the mornings and was waiting for me by my car when I got out of school. I was never so grateful for a school holiday in my life. I only had two days of classes before Thanksgiving vacation started.

Thanksgiving Day was even more fun with Seth around to share in the festivities. My parents were always very enthusiastic about giving me the full holiday experience. To spite the fact that there were typically only two of us who enthusiastically loved to eat and one of us that would eat just to be kind, they always cooked a full Thanksgiving dinner with turkey, stuffing, and all of the fixings. Usually there were so many leftovers that I would be eating turkey sandwiches for a week, and that's after Jacob would take over half of the leftovers home! As a rule the rest of the family would sit with us as we ate and just talk and visit and joke around. It was one of my favorite times of the year actually. It was one of those traditions that made it really feel like we were a normal family.

The day after Thanksgiving was always even more fun for me. It had been a long time tradition that while Alice and Rosalie take off to take part in the Black Friday shopping hysteria, I chose to stay home and put up all of the Christmas decorations. Matter of fact, my mother and I were the ONLY ones allowed to put up the Christmas decorations.

Seth laughed as he watched me meticulously comb through the dozens and dozens of decorations that I put up on our tree every year. It was four a.m. and I had stayed up all night in anticipation of getting started.

"I can't believe that you stayed up all night to get ready to put up Christmas decorations." Seth said with another laugh.

Alice stepped around the corner at that moment with a big wide smile on her face, "Oh, you never told him your dirty little secret did you?" I blushed and went back to sorting the ornaments and putting hooks on them for efficient hanging. "I'm sure you whined all about my shopping tendencies and just happened to leave out your own personal form of fascism!" She turned to him laughing "She's our own little Christmas Nazi! She won't let anybody besides Esme touch her precious decorations! She gets totally obsessed! Matter of fact, she's probably had her Christmas shopping done for weeks now."

Seth laughed heartily as he came to put his arms around my waist as he hugged me gently from behind and kissed the back of my head.

Alice continued, "You laugh now, but just remember that she's going to be YOUR Nazi from here on out!"

"You promise?" He laughed from his place behind me as I looked up at him with a smile.

"It's fuzzy, but I'm about ninety-nine percent sure." She said with a wink in our direction and then floated out of the door.

I turned from my work with a delicate crystal snowflake in my hand batting my eyelashes up at him, "If you promise to be very careful, I'll let _you_ touch my precious decorations…But ONLY you!"

He reached down and gently kissed my forehead taking the precious ornament from my hand. "I will protect them with my life." He winked down at me and gently placed it in the line of decorations I had splayed out on the table.

"Actually you know what would really help? If you go find me a perfect tree and cut it down for me…that would really save me a lot of time."

My mother spun so fast that all you could see was the blur of her dark hair twisting behind her, when she stopped her gaze was fixed on us with her mouth hanging open, "You're going to actually trust someone else with tree duty? You haven't allowed anybody else pick out our tree since you were six!"

Seth and I laughed as he looked down at me having returned to his position with his arms around my waist. "Are you testing me Angel?"

I smiled up at him with a sly smile and winked. "Maybe, but I have a feeling that if anybody can spot my idea of the perfect tree, it would have to be my idea of the perfect guy."

It was at that moment that the boys walked in from outside and Emmett groaned, "Is it possible that they could be any more sappy? I swear they're even worse than either of you whipped suckers!"

"Oh, like Rose doesn't have you wrapped around her little finger!" Edward laughed.

"No man, quite the opposite," he said with a tone that hinted that his thoughts had gone off in a less than pure direction.

I rolled my eyes and turned back to Seth giving him a kiss on the lips and an encouraging smile as Edward came back in holding an axe out for Seth with a look of skepticism. Seth looked down at me a little concerned and I smiled at him encouragingly.

"I wouldn't ask you to do it if I didn't think that you would succeed. I'll never purposely set you up for failure. I promise." I said looking up again through my eyelashes wearing a crooked smile while running my hands back and forth across his chest before drawing them up behind his head and gently running them through his hair. I shifted to my toes to reach his lips with mine giving him a soft kiss as I leaned forward pulling my body as close to his as I could.

As I pulled my lips from his he leaned over into my ear and whispered "I think that the _sun _is almost up," clearing his throat a little and blushing lightly. Then the blush in his cheeks deepened when he heard Edward snicker from his spot across the room reminded that we were in full view of my siblings and mother.

I then fell back to my heels and pushed him back with my hands. "Now off with you slave and don't come back without my prize!" I shouted at him with a slightly sadistic smile.

He bowed and winked, "As you wish my queen" he replied as he bounded out the front door and into the pink glow of morning.

Emmett groaned and rolled his eyes as he headed out the back door mumbling something about finding Rose. Edward and Jasper laughed and winked knowing why he was looking for Rose and that her Black Friday shopping trip had already begun and he wasn't going to be able to find her. I laughed and turned back to sorting my decorations.

We had Christmas music piping through the house's sound system so that you could hear it in every room of the house. The current CD of Christmas classics from the thirties, my Mother's favorite for obvious reasons, was just ending and I was getting ready to switch it with my favorite, The Trans Siberian Orchestra, as Seth came stumbling in with the biggest most magnificent blue spruce I had ever seen. He stood there looking at me imploringly as I stared wide eyed as though someone had just showed me King Tut's treasure.

"Oh MY GOSH! It's amazing! It's the most perfect tree I've ever seen!" I ran to him and jumped up giving him a huge hug and kiss on the cheek as he struggled to keep the spruce upright with me hanging from his neck.

He smiled triumphantly as he carried it to the place where I had the stand set up and placed it there as my mother and I secured it with the screws. We stood back admiring the gorgeous tree just as the music started and I leaned back against Seth's muscular chest. The moment was perfect, the perfect tree, the perfect man, and my favorite song on the stereo. For my money there was no sound on earth that gave me more chills than the tune of _O Holy Night_ ringing with the clarity of an electric guitar!

After a few minutes of admiring the tree in silence I turned to him with a bright smile. "Thank you! I knew you would make me happy! This is going to be the most perfect Christmas ever, I can feel it!"

"Anything for you my Angel." He said with a smile.

He sat and watched me the rest of the morning as I delicately unwrapped the light strands for the tree, totally amazed that I didn't have a single tangle. He helped me reach the top of the tree as we draped the lights and hung the garland and ornaments. It didn't take nearly as long to get everything done with a tall assistant helping so that mom and I weren't constantly stepping up and down the step ladder.

By noon we were completely done, the entire house decorated with evergreen swags draped over doorways and down the banister and bunches of mistletoe and red satin and velvet ribbons strategically placed around the house. It was a beautiful sight to behold and even more lovely for me now that I had a special someone to share it all with who didn't mind my obsession.

Just as I was up on the ladder putting the finishing touches over the front door suddenly Seth was behind me again with his right hand around my waist and his left hand holding two tickets in front of my face. It took a second for my eyes to focus on the typeset of the ticket and when they finally did I screamed in delight. In his hands Seth held two tickets to see the Trans Siberian Orchestra that night! I turned without even thinking and jumped into his arms wrapping my legs and arms around him as I planted a big kiss on his lips.

"I have always wanted to go to see them and it's just never worked out! How did you know? How did you even get tickets this close to the date?"

"Oh, I've had these tickets ever since we first made the plans for me to come this weekend. I was supposed to just now be getting here, remember?" He said with a smile as he kissed my cheek.

"Oh yeah! I forgot!" I said with a bright smile still hanging like a monkey around his neck.

"Anyway, I wasn't told about the full extent of your Christmas obsession, but I called Jake right after we made the plans asking what a spectacular first big night out would be and he suggested this. From your reaction I'm very glad I did!"

I bit my lip in excitement. I knew my face had to be glowing with my joy! My smile was so wide I could actually see my cheeks in the bottom of my field of vision, but I couldn't wipe the big goofy smile off of my face.

After a couple more appreciative kisses I unwrapped myself from around Seth's body and ran upstairs to dig through my closet to pick out the best outfit. I didn't want to wear something overly dressy since it was going to be in a big arena, but I also wanted to wear something nice enough for a big fancy date. To my shock and amazement I found myself hoping that Alice would get back in time to help me pick something out and right on cue she floated into my room and walked over to my closet pulling out a new garment bag that I hadn't noticed before. She unzipped it and pulled out an adorable red satin knee length cap sleeve dress with an empire waist and a matching red trench coat. In a box down below she also pulled out a pair of matching red pumps with a scalloped top and pointed toes. Other than the height of the heels on the pumps, I was very pleased with the outfit and figured that if worse came to worse, Seth could always carry me. I squealed in delight as I tried on the outfit and did a little spin in front of the mirror and then ran to the bed where Alice was perched and gave her a big hug.

"Thank you so much Alice. I owe you big time! It's amazing!"

She smiled smugly, "See it's not always bad to have a shopaholic sister!"

"You did good Alice! I am officially grateful for your addiction to shopping!"

I changed out of the dress and hung it carefully back in the closet for the evening and went back downstairs to sit on the couch in the glow of the LED Christmas lights with Seth and took a quick nap in Seth's arms before being abducted by Alice for hair and makeup.

An hour later I made my way back down the stairs to find Seth waiting for me along with all of the rest of my family, but the only one I saw was Seth. I was halfway down the stairs when I dared to look up from my precarious heels to spy a peek at him and I froze. There he was standing in the doorway in a black double breasted suit and a red tie that matched my dress perfectly. He smiled up at me with a look of total admiration in his eyes and my heart just melted and I couldn't suppress the sigh that escaped my lungs. He was just so gorgeous in the dim glow of the Christmas lights that I couldn't control my more girlish instincts. I could feel myself starting to swoon. Alice grabbed my arm laughing and led me down the rest of the stairs to the waiting support of my Seth's arms. He didn't appear to care anymore if my family was watching as he wrapped his arms around my waist and reached down to kiss me gently.

"You look so incredible. I am the luckiest man in the world." He said with an adoring smile as he looked down into my eyes and ran his fingers through my long wavy highlighted hair that waved lazily down to the middle of my back.

"I was just thinking the same thing." I winked back up at him as I ran my fingers along his shoulders to his neck and gently rubbed his neck where it met his strong shoulders.

One of my brothers cleared their throats behind us and we pulled apart so my family could pass me around and tell me how lovely I looked. After a quick reminder of the rules and modified plans for the night since the concert would be ending too late to return by my curfew we were finally allowed to leave. Seth offered me his arm in a gentlemanly fashion and led me out to Jacob's borrowed Corvette. He opened the door for me and helped me into the car and then rushed to the other side to get behind the steering wheel and make our way into the city. We had reservations for dinner that we were in danger of being late for.

An hour later we were sitting in the fanciest restaurant I had ever stepped foot in. If my family ate human food, I'm sure I would have been exposed to many places like this over the years with their proclivity to expose themselves to the finer things in life, but this was not the case and so my restaurant dining experiences were limited to trips to local fast food establishments with Jacob. I felt a little uncomfortable at first in the foreign pomp of fine dining, but it only lasted a few seconds before I was totally lost in my own little world with Seth and no longer noticed anything beyond the beautiful man sitting across from me.

We had a nice leisurely candle light dinner and then chose to walk the block from the diner to the arena for the concert. I was pleasantly surprised to find that we had suite seats at an optimal angle to the stage so we could see the details of the artists on stage and get a full appreciation for the amazing combination of lights, lasers, and pyrotechnics used in the performance. My heart raced as the performers masterfully manipulated their instruments to bring my favorite songs to life in front of me. I was riveted from the first moment and held on to Seth's hand in wonder squeezing it occasionally to show my appreciation for the sights and sounds in front of us. When the performance was over and the house lights came up, I was elated that I had finally gotten to experience the whole event live.

I laid my head on Seth's shoulder as I wrapped my arms around his rib cage giving him a long hug as we slowly made our way out of the arena and back to our car. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and leaned his cheek on the top of my head.

"Oh Seth. Thank you so much," I said looking up at him. "I couldn't have asked for a better night out! I love you so much."

Seth stopped and pulled me in front of him as we stood on the sidewalk and stretched down bringing his lips slowly to mine with a long gentle kiss that slowly grew in intensity as he pulled me in closer to his tall form. Our kiss deepened and I heard a few giggles from the other patrons passing by, but I didn't care. He finally pulled away leaving me breathless in his arms.

"I would have paid three times as much to see the pure joy on your face tonight. I've never seen anything more beautiful," He whispered to me as he stood with his face just inches from my own. "I love you so much. I hope I can always make you this happy."

I rolled up a little higher on my toes to close the minute distance between us as I resumed our kiss running my fingers through his hair and then I kissed across his cheek to his ear. "Being with you is all I really need to be happy," I said as I gently kissed his ear.

He pulled back abruptly with a funny look on his face and blurted "Sunshine! Lots and lots of sunshine!"

I laughed lightly as I rolled my balance back onto the tall heels of my pumps with a knowing smile and wrapped my arms back around his chest with my head back on his shoulder and began to pull him back toward the area where our car was parked.

I was sad to be arriving back home knowing that Seth was going to have to go back to Jake and Nessie's soon. He had already been allowed to stay overnight the night before to help with decorating. We had a bit of a delay before he had to go telling my family all about the events of the night, but finally we were out of excuses and both incredibly tired so we finally went out to the porch to kiss one another goodbye. I couldn't make myself let him go for the longest time until finally the chill on my exposed legs forced me to go back inside. I walked back to my room with a small smile still on my face as I cleaned up and dressed down into my red silky pajama pants and button down shirt set that I traditionally saved for this season and sent a quick _I love you, thank you for an amazing night _text to Seth and then climbed into bed in a vain attempt to get to sleep. I tossed and turned for an hour before I heard a gentle knock at the door. I called for my visitor to enter and bounded out of my bed and to the door when I saw it was Seth in a pair of sweatpants and a white tank top and grabbed him in a big hug.

"What are you doing here?"

"Your parents called and said that you were tossing and turning and they said that you had a long day and needed your rest and since they've noticed you rest much better with me around they invited me to come over."

"Really?" I said in shock.

"Yeah, I was surprised too." He said with a smile. "You look beautiful by the way. Nice jammies."

"Thanks, their one of my special Christmas pajamas. I have a whole set of Christmas themed jammies that I only wear during this season."

He laughed as he pulled me toward the bed, "Alice wasn't joking, huh? You really are obsessed!"

I laughed as I climbed in next to him, no longer awkward with being close to him. "Like she said, you shouldn't laugh because you're the one who's sentenced to deal with me from here on out."'

"Bring on the judge, I'll be happy to serve the time!" He yelled with a laugh.

"Shhh…you want them to kick you right back out of here?" I warned placing my hand over his mouth.

"Un uh" he answered shaking his head as he kissed my hand and pulled me tighter into his arms. I cuddled up into his embrace, leaning up to place one more kiss on his waiting lips and then I rested my head on his chest and fell asleep to the sounds of his rhythmic breathing and his strong steady heartbeat.

**_Disclaimer: The Twilight Saga and it's characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I'm just borrowing them for a while :D_**


	48. Chapter 48

**48. My Biggest Surprise Yet**

Going back to school after Thanksgiving was still hard, but not as hard as it had been in the past. I was more confident in my relationship with Seth now and was finally beginning to believe that he wasn't going to disappear. In fact he was the most consistent part of my life right now. He joined me for breakfast every morning and met me every day after school without fail. He was sort of like my North Star.

Even though school was easier, I was glad that I only had to endure two and a half weeks before the Christmas vacation began. Once Seth found out about my love of everything Christmas, he suggested that we stay through the day after Christmas so I could celebrate with my family before we took off for La Push. I was starting to get worried when Seth kept saying that he wasn't finding any places that would work for him that he wouldn't find anything in time for me to make the trip back home with him to pack up and meet his friends and family. He assured me that we could always make the trip back even if he didn't have anywhere to put his things…there were always storage places we could rent.

I should have known better though…they are all so sneaky. The last day of school Seth picked me up and told me that he had a surprise for me and asked if he could drive. I handed him the keys willingly and hopped into the passenger seat, elated that I was going to have two whole weeks free to be with my Seth as much as we were allowed.

I sat and watched as the scenery passed as we headed toward my family's home. I looked over a bit confused as to what the surprise would be, and the confusion grew as we drove past the small lane that led to our family's estate and instead turned down the next small lane just a half mile further up the road. I had gone down this lane before exploring the area and knew it dead ended at a small secluded pond. As we rounded the last little curve my eyes popped open at the sight in front of me. There stood my family all smiling in front of the most adorable log cabin I had ever seen. It was a rather large log cabin, consisting of two floors with each of the windows accented by green shutters with hearts in the middle and a beautiful wrap around porch with a wide porch swing that faced the drive and an attached two car garage.

"Surprise!" Seth said as he turned to smile at my shocked expression. "They knew that it would be as much a pain in their side as it would ours for me to be living in town, so they suggested buying this land and they would help me build a house here. Your Mom helped with the design of course, she wanted it to be something that you would like."

Tears were welling in my eyes as I looked at the beautiful log house…A home for my Seth so he could be close. Leave it to my Mother to pick what was almost exactly my dream house right out of thin air and make it into reality. It wasn't actually for me, and I knew that we wouldn't be encouraged to spend a lot of quality time here alone, but it was still so amazing.

I slowly stepped out of the car still in absolute shock at what they had done and then turned my gaze to my family and whispered "Thank you." They all smiled and walked over to me since they could see I was having a hard time remembering how to walk myself and hugged me and offered to help me go inside and check it out for myself. Seth stood on one side of me taking my hand, and my Mother stood on the other as they lead me up the steps to the porch and slowly opened the front door for me, letting me step through before they followed. I gasped as I looked around the room. The red front door opened in to a huge open space with large vaulted ceilings. The whole room smelled of rich wood and cinnamon. The back wall held huge windows that stretched nearly as high as the ceiling and were topped with a semicircular shape that looked out beyond the back deck and out to the pond where a small dock was also built out into the water with a fairly large gazebo at the end that seemed to almost float on the water.

To the right of the door was a living room space with a large black and gray river rock fireplace with a wide gray mantle with a fire burning amber in the hearth. The room was still very empty with the exception of a beautiful Christmas tree in the corner and two stockings hanging over the fireplace that said Seth and Lina and a small cream leather loveseat that faced the fireplace. At the back of the living room there was a beautiful ornately carved wooden staircase that led to the upper level with a small door underneath that I suspected was most likely a downstairs bathroom.

To the left of the doorway there was a rather large kitchen that looked quite similar to the one in the main house except that it had granite counter tops with coloring that matched the fireplace. As I looked at the island stove with the bar stools on the living room side of the area I suddenly recognized that the subtle differences between this kitchen and the one at the main house were familiar. They had been laid out on the building plans that I had seen in the kitchen of the main house back in September around the time that I had my first date with Connor. I crinkled my forehead slightly in confusion and then went back to examining the rest of the house. Behind the kitchen in the far corner in front of the large windows was what appeared to be the dining area with a small crystal chandelier hung above the center where a table would someday stand.

I spun in circles in the middle of the room a couple more times and then turned to the group of expectant faces watching from the doorway. I was at a loss for words as I stood there stuttering trying to make them come to me.

"HA! We rendered her speechless!" Emmett crowed from his place on the porch. "I never thought I'd see that happen!"

Everyone laughed as I stood there spinning again. Seth stepped forward and took my hand again. "You haven't seen it all yet Angel. Let me show you around upstairs."

My family let us go up alone as the words finally started coming to me halfway up the staircase, "How did you? When did you? How long have you?"

Seth laughed placing a small kiss on my lips at the top of the stairs. "All will be revealed in time. For now just come with me." He opened a door at the top of the staircase and ushered me in to the small hallway that must lead to rooms above the garage. The first door opened to a small office which he already had his work station set up and ready to go. The second door opened to a massive bathroom with a shower in one corner and a large white Jacuzzi tub big enough for two against the far wall. It had a double sink with large lights over the large gilded mirror that hung above them. The last door was a very large bedroom with a closet nearly as big as the bathroom we had just left.

I turned toward him and simply said, "Alice?"

He nodded and smiled. I turned back to see that the closet was already beginning to fill with garment bags meant for me. I turned back to check out the bedroom that already had some furnishings in them and it took me a moment to recognize them as the bedroom set from the room that he was staying in at Jacob and Nessie's. I looked up questioningly and he smiled.

"They heard that you really loved the bed, so they decided to give it to us."

"Us?"

"Well, yeah…this is for us. Hopefully you'll live here with me someday. All of this was with the anticipation of the future in mind."

I smiled and hugged him and then looked around again and frowned. "Wait, there's only one bedroom. Are you hinting that you don't want to expand the family someday?" I asked suddenly worried.

He laughed, "NO! I'm definitely not saying that at all. By the time that happens we'll be ready for an upgrade anyway. This is more the house to be near you that you will be comfortable in too and maybe live in as newlyweds for a short time before moving on and moving up."

I smiled really relieved. "You were really worried weren't you?"

I reluctantly shook my head. "I really like the idea of little Seths and Linas running around someday. I've even been dreaming about it some lately."

His eyebrows shot up at that, "Oh really?"

I blushed and stole another look at my future bedroom. It really was beautiful. Not very many people got a place like this as a newlywed, much less knew it existed a year and a half before they would even be old enough to get married!

I did another spin taking everything in and then turned back to Seth and rolled up onto my toes as I wrapped my arms around his neck placing my hand on the back of his head and pulling him down toward me. I gave him a long, slow kiss full of hints of the future before pulling away. "Thank you so much for all of this. You really didn't have to do all of this…I'm so glad that you're going to be so close though."

He pulled me to the window that looked out of the room into the forest. He stood behind me with his left arm around my waist as he pointed out the window with his right and whispered, "Look." There through the tree tops I could see my family's house. Our houses weren't more than maybe five hundred feet apart. I gasped as I realized how close we really would be. "And look there," he said again into my ear as he pointed down at a path that appeared to be completely flat and lined with large rocks and covered in pea gravel, "there's a nice safe path that you can take to get here. They even rigged it with lights so you can go back and forth at night without any problems."

I turned around in his arms to face him with a wide bright smile. "How will I ever be able to repay them for all that they've done for us? This is so amazing. How can I even begin to thank them?"

He smiled and kissed my nose and leaned down into my ear as he whispered, "I'm pretty sure with their hearing you just did." Then with a small chuckle he leaned down and kissed my lips pulling me close and then spinning with me over to the bed. We fell on the bed still kissing a little lost in our own world when we heard a light knock on the door.

"Just because we built you a house doesn't mean there aren't still rules." My Father's authoritative voice called through the door that now seemed incredibly thin.

"Yes sir." We both called back our faces a matching shade of red as we stood back up and made our way over to the door. We opened it to thankfully find him smiling with a bit of humor in his eyes.

I reached up and hugged my Father around the neck. "Seriously, how can I ever thank you guys enough for this?"

"Merry Christmas, sweetheart." He replied with a wide smile and a kiss on the forehead as he walked back down to the main floor with his arm still around me.

We did our best to thank my family again and then to my surprise they left us alone in the house to enjoy some time together. We walked into the kitchen to find that they had left us a platter of lasagna, a bowl of salad, and a two liter of soda on the counter with plates and cutlery for our supper. I sat at the counter still looking around in wonder as we ate.

"So, you never answered my questions." He looked at me a bit confused. "How…When…How long?" I said with a smile.

He laughed. "Oh…well, first of all it was all their idea. We've been working on it pretty much non-stop since they let up on the grounding and I was able to pull my sorry self out of bed again…mostly during the day while you were at school and they worked at night a lot too after you would fall asleep."

I shook my head in disbelief. "You know after spending pretty much my whole life with them, you would think that they couldn't surprise me anymore and then they do something like this. It's just totally amazing!"

We sat and talked a bit longer and then when I got up to wash the dishes in the sink I was reminded about the plans for the kitchen that I had seen so long ago. "Hey, I don't know if you have an answer for this one, but do you have any idea why I saw plans for this very kitchen in my Mom's hands back in September…when I was still dating Connor?"

He turned and smiled at me. "Would you be surprised to know that the plans for the whole house were already completed by the time I got here?"

My mouth fell open and a furrow of confusion invaded my forehead… "But how?" I whispered.

He shook his head, "Don't ask me. They're your family. Maybe you can pry it out of them."

"Oh you bet I will…eventually. Right now I think that loveseat and fire are calling our names." I said trying to make my voice a little more appealing as I reached over and walked my fingers up his hand to his shoulder. "What do you say we sit and watch the fire and lights for a little while."

He wrapped the arm I had just teased him with around my waist and pulled me closer leaning down a few millimeters from my face, "Sure, if that's what you want." Then he brushed his nose along my chin and then buried it into my neck wiggling it back and forth sending me into peals of laughter.

"No fair!" I yelled between the uncontrollable giggling as I tried to push away. He pulled me tighter tickling my sides as well. I was on the verge of hyperventilating when he finally set me free. He was laughing at me as I tried desperately to catch my breath again with my hands on my knees for balance. I looked up with my face still pink from the exertion. "One of these days I'm going to find your secret and when I do you're going to pay!"

"Oh yeah?" he said as he grabbed me around the waist and threw me over his shoulder. I kicked my feet wildly in the air and hit at his back laughing as he carried me over to the loveseat and threw me down over the back onto the cushions. Then he leaned over the back to give me a sweet kiss and walked around the side lifting my head up so he could slide under it and laying my head back on his lap. We sat there for a long time looking at the fire and talking about our upcoming trip to La Push as he played with my hair. It felt so good just to be together in a place that was ours. We weren't encroaching on Jake and Nessie's house or in the middle of the always active living quarters of my family here, and it already felt like home.

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **


	49. Chapter 49

**49. A Christmas to Remember**

My curfew was nearing as Seth and I rushed down the brand new and quite well lit path from his house to my parents' house. Knowing that the curfew also meant that he had to be gone by midnight as well, he walked me to the back door, gave me one last goodnight kiss as he opened the door for me to go in, and then walked back up toward the trail that led back to his house. I watched until I could no longer see his tall muscular back for the trees and then turned to make my way into the living room.

There I found the entire family except for Nessie and Jake sitting around. My mother was busy arranging the piles of presents that had appeared under the tree throughout the course of the day. My father was reading a book in his large antique reading chair that looked like it belonged in the library of a fancy castle in England instead of our modern living room. Alice and Edward were once again trying to beat one another at chess while Bella and Jasper sat nearby reading their own literary favorites. Emmett and Rosalie were cuddled up on the couch blissfully unaware that anybody else existed and were on the verge of choosing to retire to their room for the night. I made a mental note to be sure to wear my headphones to bed tonight.

"Hello there darling," my mother said as she looked up from her sorting and smiled warmly at me. "Did the two of you enjoy your evening?"

"It was wonderful Mom. Thanks. Oh and the lasagna was phenomenal too."

"Oh, well thank Edward for that one." She said nodding her head in his direction.

"Food Network again?" I asked looking down. He looked up and smiled. Alice, taking advantage of his distraction, made a move he hadn't expected and set him up for check. He looked back at her frowning a second and then countered moving himself back into safety.

"So did that nice soft bed finally get some better use tonight?" Emmett asked from the couch.

I turned red at just the idea of my family thinking that way about us as Edward smiled toward me with a small wink, "No Emmett, unlike _some people_, Seth and Lina have some modicum of self control."

"It's only a matter of time. They won't be able to hold out forever. Like you and Bella would have actually waited if you hadn't been afraid you'd kill her!" he laughed throwing a pillow at Edward.

Edward threw it back rolling his eyes and glancing up at me slightly appraisingly. I knew it was because he had heard my thoughts which had flitted back and forth between relief that it wouldn't be forever, just sixteen more months before we would revisit the subject, and wondering for a fraction of a second if we really could hold out that long as the memory of kissing Seth on "our" bed before my Dad knocked on the door popped in and out of my mind. I knew that if we had any chance at all of holding out for our deadline that we weren't going to be able to go crossing any more lines in that bed or any bed for that matter. Then I thought about how content I had been just sitting with Seth as he played with my hair watching the firelight dance across our living room and I knew that if such a simple moment with him was so wonderful that I wanted to savor all of the simple moments and minute steps between here and there. He nodded, happy with where my thoughts finally landed, and returned his focus back to Alice and their game. He let out a soft growl when he saw that somehow she had managed to put him back into check.

I went over and sat on the loveseat next to Bella watching Edward and Alice continue their never-ending dance with their chess pieces. Bella looked up from her book and reached over to put her arm around my shoulder pulling me into a half hug. "So did you like your house Lina?" she asked with a smile.

I smiled back as I put my head on her shoulder. "It's perfect. How did you guys know?"

She gave my shoulder a little squeeze, "Well because we know you silly…and we have memories that put elephants to shame. We just sort of brainstormed all of the things that you seemed to like most about the houses that we've lived in and threw it all together into this one."

I looked around the room to see that everyone was looking at me with sweet smiles on their faces. I'm not sure I ever felt as loved by my family as I did in that moment. Then I remembered my challenge. "Okay…so I do have one question. Seth tells me that you guys had the plans already completed by the time that he decided to move here? And I know I saw Mom with the plans for the kitchen while I was dating Connor."

They all laughed and threw knowing glances back and forth across the room at each other. There was a long silence and finally I couldn't stand it anymore. "So are you guys going to level with me or what?"

Finally Edward spoke up obviously mentally nominated by the room to do all of the talking since he could piece together all of the different aspects of their thoughts into one coherent story. He grimaced a little and then started in, "Well Lina, you know our capabilities. We had it figured out long before you did that you were falling for Seth. I could hear your annoyance at yourself for feeling thankful that he didn't have a girlfriend, the glee you felt when he would call, the comfort you felt from his advice, it was obvious you had feelings for him but you were holding back because of your fears and thought that Connor was a more appropriate person for you to date. I also unfortunately knew about Connor's feelings for Leighton and knew that most likely his plan wasn't going to turn out quite as he hoped. In addition to all of that Jasper was picking up on your emotions when you were talking about Seth and Alice kept seeing your future pop in and out of clarity and when you put it all together we had a feeling that things would work out this way. We didn't really expect the whole imprinting thing, believing as he did that he would have done that upon seeing your face if he was going to, but we knew what you felt for one another and started planning ahead."

I looked at Edward and then looked around the room shaking my head in bewilderment. Finally all I could manage was a quiet, "Thank you for loving me so much and trying to make me happy. I love you all so much." They all smiled back at me and Bella squeezed me again. We sat and talked for a while before I excused myself to go upstairs and tuck myself into bed, being sure to remember my headphones.

I awoke the next morning to a soft knock on my door. I rolled over and propped myself up on my elbow as I gave permission for whoever it was to enter as I slid the headphones off and placed them on my bedside table. I smiled as I saw that it was Seth.

"Merry Christmas Eve!" He said with a smile carrying a tray with warm cinnamon covered French toast, fruit, juice, and a single red rose in a bud vase on top. He came over as I sat up in my bed, attempting to smooth out my wild bed head, and propped myself against the headboard as he sat the tray across my lap kissing me on the forehead.

"Wow! This looks amazing! Thank you!" I beamed up at him.

"You bring some for yourself too or am I eating alone?" I asked as I started to stretch and then remembering that could be a "sunshine thing" for him I stopped and redirected my arms to cross over my chest instead as I rolled my head popping my neck.

He noticed what I had done and laughed. "Just a second" he said as he disappeared into the hall, reappearing a couple of seconds later with his own heaping tray. I scooted over in the bed so that there was room next to me for him to sit back against the headboard and took my first bite of the heavenly French toast.

"MMMMM!" I moaned in response to the delicious food.

He smiled at me and then took a bite of his own reacting in a similar fashion. Suddenly I saw Bella's head pop through the doorway looking a little funny and then seeing our plates smiled and waved as she flitted on down the hallway. I turned to Seth and we locked eyes for a second before we burst into howling laughter!

"I guess your French toast is a little too good!" I said as I took another bite and reflexively moaned again. Seth reached over and kissed my forehead before taking another bite from his plate.

After we had finished our food, Seth took our trays downstairs while I got ready for the day. I put on my favorite green cashmere sweater and black jeans and threw my green velvet headband in my hair and made my way downstairs. Before I was all the way down to the ground floor the smell of Christmas baking filled my nose and made my mouth water. Yet another of our numerous Christmas traditions was to bake all morning on Christmas Eve. We make several different kinds of cookies, bake dutch apple and cinnamon streusel bread, and bake a pie or two as we dance and sing around the kitchen. Then we take the majority of the fruits of our labor to the local homeless shelter where my father, Nessie, Jake and I volunteer to help with dinner that evening. This year I was glad that Seth chose to join us. It was a very important part of the holiday for me to help out those less fortunate. The rest of our family tried to join us in the past but a lot of the people there tended to have uncared for and exposed scrapes and cuts that caused a great deal of discomfort for them, so instead they do their best to help in the morning and then work on prepping for the Christmas Day meal and getting the last of the Christmas arrangements ready while we are gone. After the meal is over, my father always takes time to provide medical care for the patrons in need before we go home for an evening with the family.

We went about the events of the day, Seth happily joining in all day long. As the tradition went, we would always listen to Christmas music and dance and sing as we mixed batter and took pastry after pastry out of the oven to cool and when a slower more romantic song would come on the couples instinctually danced together which would typically either leave me alone, or if one of my brothers or my father would notice I was looking particularly left out they would chivalrously ask me to dance which unfortunately always left someone without a partner. This year thankfully this wasn't an issue thanks to Seth. When the slow songs would start, he was usually one of the first grab me up and start the coupes dances. I wasn't sure if it was out of habit or that they actually liked to dance with me, but occasionally my father or one of my brothers would grab me to dance instead and Seth would offer his hand to the lady who was left out. It was a wonderful day. I'm not sure the last time I had been so blissfully happy. Our evening at the shelter was amazing too. Seth was a natural at the shelter. His kind heart radiated throughout that room and his smile was infectious even amongst those who had little hope.

The night at the shelter passed quickly and soon we were making our way back home. Once we were home we sat and visited in the colorful lights of the tree and the amber glow of the fire in the large fireplace while Nessie, Jake, Seth and I drank eggnog and warm apple cider. Just before midnight my father got out his father's old leather bible, just as he did every year, and read us the Christmas story.

Some of my siblings were a little uncomfortable with this tradition when my father first started it in an attempt to bring some more faith-centric parts of the holidays into the home for me, many of them believed after what they had endured and had become either meant that there either was no God or that there was one, but they never would have a chance to go to heaven because they no longer had a soul. I personally disagreed with both of those opinions. I only had to look at the world around me and see how things worked together to believe that their was a God, and if my beloved family members didn't have a soul then I honestly didn't know if anyone could because they were some of the kindest most loving people I knew. They thought that the monster that they had to constantly fight to keep at bay somehow was an indication that their soul was lost, but in my mind the simple fact that they chose to resist was the very proof that they did have souls, amazing and beautiful souls. We all have our demons; the things that tempt us that we have to choose not to give in to. How many of us manage to fight even the smallest of those demons with the tenacity of my family? How many of us even try? No, if anybody who walked this planet retained a soul, it was those beloved people who raised me to be the person I am.

With time my siblings began to grow more comfortable with the story of hope and joy. After a while I think they even began to look forward to it as much as I did. We all sat around the room as we listened to my father's calm and soothing voice retell the story of God's love, each of us cuddled up to our mates. I sighed in the comfort of having my own love to cuddle with in the warm glow of the holiday lights for once as I leaned back against Seth's chest and he placed a gentle kiss on my hair.

Once the story was over we sang a couple of Christmas carols and then went about the task of sorting out the presents. In a family where money is no object Christmas giving often went to the extreme…fast sports cars, expensive one of a kind jewelry, costly original copies of classical books…it was a never ending parade of extravagance. Getting ready for the present opening time, I didn't expect much in my pile considering I had a whole house sitting on the far side of the tree line, and yet my pile was nearly as tall is it was every year. We each took turns opening gifts as we went around the circle. As usual this process took the rest of the night. I got some amazing stuff as usual, but my favorite gifts were of course from Seth. Among a few other thoughtful gifts he had given me a Waterford Crystal ornament to add to my collection that was shaped like a heart and said "Our First Christmas" and he had them inscribe our names and the year in the additional space below.

We had just finished the last round of gift giving and were about to clean up the massive pile of wrapping paper that was heaped in the middle of the room when Seth asked us to wait because he had just one more. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box and held it in front of me. My hands were shaking as I took it from him.

"It's not an engagement ring yet," he whispered in my ear, "but only because it's still a little early for that. It's more of a promise ring."

I opened the hinged top to see a beautiful heart shaped sapphire mounted on the small golden band with two smaller triangular diamonds on either side. I looked up at him with tears welling in my eyes.

"Oh Seth, it's beautiful."

He pulled it out of the box and turned it so I could see inside the band. "I had it inscribed too."

I took it from his hand and read the tiny script on the inside of the band. _To my Angel, who forever owns my heart_.

I reached over with the ring sitting on the top of my index finger and placed my hands on either side of his face as I gave him a long sweet kiss. He pulled away and smiled at me as he took my left hand from his face and gently took the ring from it's temporary place and then slid it down my ring finger, lifting it to his lips to kiss it when he was done. I leaned over again and slipped my arms around his shoulders and nestled my face into his neck kissing him gently below the ear and then leaned up to whisper, "My heart is yours forever."

We sat there a few minutes blissfully lost in our little world of two when I finally started to hear the shuffle of wrapping paper as my family began to clean up around us. I reluctantly pulled myself away from Seth's arms and began to help.

My mother stopped me and held my hand up to examine my ring. "Very beautiful and appropriate, I'm so happy for you." She whispered to me with a smile that stretched across her face and lit her kind eyes before hugging me and returning to her work.

All morning long my siblings took turns taking a closer peek at my ring. It held nowhere near the monetary value of most of their treasures, but they appraised it as if it were the most precious of jewels. It did feel that way to me. It was so beautiful, not only because it sparkled in the light and was made of my favorite gemstone, but more because of the promise it held, the promise of a future with my Seth.

Lunchtime came and we all gathered at the table filled with the most mouth watering foods ever created. The three humans and one hybrid ate happily while the rest of the family sat with us and talked. They weren't able to eat themselves, but they enjoyed watching us get pleasure from the food.

When we were finished eating and could barely move due to our overstuffed bellies, they graciously cleaned up as the four of us who had now gone well over thirty hours without sleep went to go take naps. I was more than a little shocked that my parents suggested that we go to our house to sleep saying it would be quieter and we could rest more soundly.

We slowly walked our way hand in hand down the path to the house and sluggishly opened the door to step inside and we both froze with a loud gasp. There was one last unexpected present from my family that not even Seth anticipated. The house was completely furnished with brand new furniture. In the dining room there stood a beautiful china hutch filled with a beautiful set of china just like my favorite set of my mother's and a large dining table with soft cushioned chairs. The kitchen was outfitted with small appliances adorning the countertops as well as canisters of dry goods and I suspected a full set of causal dining dishes, pots, pans, glasses, and silverware. The living room had a big screen TV along the wall next to the door and the remainder of the living room set that matched the little cream leather love seat with matching end tables. The walls had been adorned with paintings, pictures, and decorations that I absolutely adored. On the kitchen counter there was a note that simply said, "You can change anything you don't like or would like to adjust, we just wanted to help out a bit."

We slowly looked at each other, both still in shock and then still hand in hand made our way upstairs to see if there were more surprises there. In Seth's office we discovered a wall unit computer desk center with room for two computers, a space for each of us to work. In the bathroom we found that it had been outfitted with towels and toiletries and that the linen closet was full of towels, sheets, and blankets. In our bedroom there were more decorations on the walls and the closet was now full of clothes for both Seth and me. Alice had been very busy.

"I wonder if they did anything to the basement."

"Basement? I didn't know we had a basement."

"Well, we didn't have it done yet, so it was going to be a surprise a little later."

He took me back down to an area behind the staircase that I hadn't noticed before. There was a door there that blended in with the wood so well that you could barely tell that it was there. Behind that door was a fairly large laundry room with a brand new red steam washer and dryer hooked up and ready to be used and a long counter for folding clean laundry and a smaller LCD TV to watch while doing the washing. There was also a dumbwaiter between this room and our bedroom that rolled right down onto the counter for easy access. I was sort of laughing at myself for missing the fact that there was no laundry room before that.

At the end of the laundry room there were two doors. He explained that the one straight ahead went to the garage and then he opened the one to the right just past the washer and dryer to find that there was a set of stairs that led to the basement. He flipped on the light and stepped down onto the wide decking that opened to the staircase and held his hand out for me and held it as we walked down together.

We stepped out into the basement to find that they had in fact finished the basement but fully established it as a recreational room with a pool table, foosball table, a second larger big screen TV with gaming consoles already hooked up and a large stereo with a full collection of my favorite CD's mounted on one wall. There was also a large storage area and a small gym for me to spar with my brothers.

We walked back upstairs again in a half awake daze, totally dumbfounded by the unending generosity of my family. We looked at each other and didn't even have to say anything. We nodded and made our way back across the trail to my parents' house. They were all sitting in the dining room waiting; even Nessie and Jake were still there. We walked in and told them all how much we appreciated everything that they had done for us. They all came over wishing us Merry Christmas again as they gave us each hugs.

My father not so subtly mentioned how incredibly comfortable the couch was for napping as we left to go back to the new house. We were so exhausted that nothing would probably happen even if we did sleep in the large bed, but out of respect for my father's thinly veiled wishes we cuddled up on the couch and after a few more minutes of admiring our fully furnished home, we drifted off to sleep in each other's arms.

The sun was just setting in the distance casting a purple glow into the room as the sound of knocking on the door pulled us from our peaceful slumber. It was Alice come to claim me and remind me that I needed to go home and pack for the flight early the next morning to Washington. I kissed Seth goodbye as a far too excited Alice swiftly pulled me back toward the main house. I spent the next hour arguing with Alice as to what I did and didn't need to take with me, winning only half of the battles.

Finally after getting all packed for the trip, I made my way back downstairs to spend the evening with my family before leaving them for a full week. We played Trivial Pursuit as a group activity. I usually did my best to get paired with Alice or Edward since I was at an unfair disadvantage having not lived nearly as long as the rest of them had I figured I needed the extra advantage of someone who could pick the answers out of others heads to give us a fighting chance. We laughed together as Edward and I annihilated the rest of the teams, giving each other high fives when the answers we gave originated from our own minds and not any others.

All too soon it was time for me to get to bed so I could wake up insanely early for our four a.m. flight. I walked around the room giving everyone one last hug and quick thank you before going back upstairs and collapsing on my bed. It seemed like only minutes before my alarm clock was blaring at me from across the room, telling me to get up and get moving again.

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **


	50. Chapter 50

**50. Home**

I rushed to get ready and get downstairs, both extremely nervous and extremely excited for my trip to Washington. I had heard so much about Forks and La Push where my family formed into the incarnation that I had always loved. Forks is where Edward and Bella and Jake all met, where Bella and Edward were married, where the pack lived, and where Nessie was born. I was so excited and yet so nervous to meet so many of the people that I had heard so many stories about throughout my lifetime.

Thankfully I had already met Sue, Seth's mom and Bella's stepmother, as well as Charlie, Bella's dad…so I didn't have to stress as much over that part. I already knew them and we all liked each other. Even the pack I wasn't that stressed over, it was Leah who had me totally freaked out. Leah was Seth's notoriously cantankerous big sister. She never liked my family due to their "bloodsucker" background and tended to be very protective of her baby brother. I had to respect her for that part though; I'm glad that she was so close to Seth and cared so much about his well being.

I walked downstairs struggling with my much too large suitcase and carry on bag to see Seth, Jake, and Nessie already waiting for me. Seth rushed up the stairs to lend me a hand, taking my bulky oversized suitcase with ease with one hand and my hand that had been carrying it in the other and led me down to the ground floor.

Nessie was standing by the door hugging Edward and Bella goodbye. It was always hard, even after all of the trips that Jake and Nessie had taken in the seven years since they had been married, to let her go. It was even harder when she was returning to a place that held so many special and simultaneously horrific memories for them. They kissed her forehead and gave her another big hug before turning to Jake and as always reminding him that he better take care of their one and only baby.

Jake and Nessie walked out to put their bags in the car and the family turned their attention to Seth and I. We made the rounds getting hugs and wishes for a safe journey from each one. When we reached Edward and Bella we got a very similar response from them as Jake and Nessie.

"She may not have been our baby, but she's still our special girl. You take good care of her Seth and promise to protect her if she needs it." Bella said looking up at Seth with a very serious expression with Edward sharing the same intense look.

"Oh Bella, Edward, you know you don't even have to ask me that don't you? I could never let anyone or anything hurt Lina." She smiled up at him shaking her head and Edward smiled over at me. They both gave me hugs and then followed us out to the porch to wave us off.

I climbed into the back seat next to Nessie. Anytime we had two wolves in the car we were automatically relegated to the back seat just so they had room for their very long legs. My hands were shaking as we started out for the airport and Nessie reached over and put her hands over mine with a smile. Suddenly I wasn't seeing the road in front of us, but a beautiful beach with a rocky shore strewn with large pieces of driftwood. First Beach the sign said. A bonfire burned on the rocky egress as a large group of tall men that looked a lot like our guys and their petite mates sat around laughing and relaxing together. I saw the elders including Jacob's father Billy sitting in the circle telling stories and I saw a beautiful girl who I recognized as Leah sitting there looking a bit sad and lonely, and I saw Nessie encouraging me to get to know her and that she thought that if anybody could break through the anger it would be me.

"Why would I be able to when nobody else can Ness?" I whispered looking at her with a confused expression.

She smiled knowingly and then turned to look out the window on her side. I stared at her still completely perplexed and then turned to look out my own window. I did feel better with a slight taste of what to expect.

As we waited to board the plane I sat next to Seth in the airport waiting area holding on to his hand bouncing my leg with nervous energy. He looked over and smiled as he placed his other hand on my leg to hold it still and then he leaned over to kiss me slowly and gently and then deepened it slightly, parting my lips with his tongue ever so gently and sharing my breath. Suddenly I forgot all about my nerves as I took my spare hand and wrapped it around his head, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss that much more. He finally pulled away laughing slightly.

"Feel better?"

"Uh…yeah…so not fair though."

"Hey, don't worry, that won't be the last kiss you get like that this week. We're going to be away from your family for a whole week, so it won't be so awkward to fit those in a bit more frequently."

I smiled up at him with a little giggle just as they called overhead to say that they were beginning boarding for our flight. We stood up with tickets in hand and went to stand in line to find our places on the plane. We were looking at a short hour and a half hop to Detroit with a three-hour layover and then a five-hour flight to Seattle where we decided that we would rent a car and drive the four hours from Seattle to Sue and Charlie's house in Forks for a grand total of thirteen to fourteen hours of travel time ahead of us. We boarded our first flight at four a.m. and took off with no problems. The only issue that I found was Jake and Nessie's inability to keep their hands off of one another.

I looked over again after twenty minutes to see that they were still lip locked, wondering if they were ever going to come up for air. I groaned a little bit and Seth chuckled at me.

"This is something I didn't think of ahead of time, I never thought about the fact that they would be even WORSE when away from home and the prying mind of Edward! This is going to be a long trip."

Seth leaned in close to me and reached over with his hand sweeping my hair over my shoulder as he leaned so close to my ear that I could feel his breath on my earlobe as he spoke, "Well, we wouldn't notice if we got lost in a little making out of our own."

I shivered at the combination of the sensation of his breath whistling seductively past my ear and my own temptation to take him up on his offer. I leaned over to his ear and returned the favor. "I think I could go for that Mr. Clearwater." I whispered as I gently nibbled his earlobe. Before I could react his lips were on mine kissing me hungrily. I giggled slightly at the intensity that was suddenly there. Obviously I had greatly underestimated the power of the ear!

We were grateful to see that the distraction did make it seem that we arrived in Detroit much more quickly than we had anticipated. We got off the plane and found a place to get some food and wait for our connecting flight to Seattle. The second we took off from Detroit headed to Seattle Mr. and Mrs. Black's make out fest resumed. We kissed a little ourselves, but I was just far too much of a private person to be able to let go and enjoy in such a public setting, so I suggested that we chill out and watch an in flight movie and cuddle a bit. Jake and Nessie, apparently far more practiced than ourselves, continued to make out the remainder of the trip and at one point mysteriously disappeared to the rest rooms around the same time. I had a feeling from their lack of qualms about making out on a plane, that this was not their first foray into the mile high club. I shook my head and tried my best to focus on the movie and not think about my hormonally crazed siblings. I finally drifted off in Seth's arms; grateful that we weren't as obvious as they were and awoke as we were making our final approach into Seattle. Nessie and Jake had thankfully returned to their seats and were for the first time since boarding the plane, no longer interlocked at the lips.

We got off the plane and collected our luggage and made our way to the car rental area where we rented a minivan with fold down middle row seating so there would be plenty of leg room for he boys to ride wherever they wished. Seth chose to drive being more acquainted with the changes that had taken place in the area since Jacob moved away. I was pleased too because it meant that I got to sit up front with Seth and was able to see more of the amazing scenery on our drive through the Olympic mountains to Forks. We were doubly pleased that Jake and Nessie's activities aboard the plane had worn them out enough that they chose to sleep during the drive as opposed to providing a repeat performance.

I was totally amazed at the beauty of the area. To spite the gloomy skies, the whole area was just breathtaking. I was a bit disappointed that I wasn't going to get to go on the ferry this time since it would actually be faster to drive around the sound than to take the ferry at the time of day we were traveling. Seth promised I would get a ferry ride across the sound before we headed home though. It was a fairly clear day so I was able to see Mt. Rainier and Mt. Hood from the interstate as we took Interstate 5 around the sound jumping on route 16 back up to route three and then getting on US 101 around the Olympic National Forest past Port Angeles and back down to Forks. My family always made a point of living near large forested areas that had large amounts of gloomy weather to allow them the most normal life possible, but I could totally understand the draw to this area with it's greens so much more vivid than in other parts of the country and the air so much more fresh and vibrant. The area was so full of life and color that it's beauty almost felt like it was singing to me.

"Wow Seth, are you sure you want to leave this place? It's absolutely breathtaking!"

He looked over and smiled, "Maybe to you, but to me it's just the same old same old. I've lived here all of my life, I don't really notice so much anymore, but even if I did, it wouldn't even come close to comparing with you." He reached up from where he held my hand on the middle console and touched my cheek with his index finger running it back and forth across my cheekbone and then took my hand in his own again.

I stared at him a while longer, my nerves that were beginning to vibrate back to the surface suddenly calmed at the thought that I had such a wonderful man at my side. After a long time taking in the scenery that was my Seth, I finally snapped back to the real world and began absorbing the scenery of the area again. After a long and winding drive we finally pulled into the city limits of the small town of Forks just an hour after the sun had set on the distant horizon.

We continued through Forks to pull up in front of a tall white house situated just outside the limits of the reservation. It was sort of a compromise for Sue and Charlie so that he legally still lived in his district and yet she was still close enough to the reservation to take part in the daily activities and lives of the people there. This house had been a present from the Cullens for their wedding. Charlie sold his house at that time and Sue rented out her house on the reservation to Seth and Leah. The car engine had barely shut off when Sue and Charlie came running out of the house to greet us. Charlie rushed over and pulled Nessie into a bear hug and then put his arm out around Jacob to hug them both at the same time. Sue ran straight to Seth and gave him a big hug too and then tentatively turned to me with a wide sparkling smile.

"Hello again Angelina. I'm so glad you could come." She said reaching out to give me a gentle friendly hug.

"It's my pleasure Mrs. Swan." I shyly smiled back as Seth stepped next to me and put his arm around my shoulder and kissed my forehead. His mother's smile deepened as her gaze moved to her son. You could tell she was so pleased to see him happy and in love.

"Oh please call me Sue, dear." She said returning her gaze to my face.

I shook my head and then pointed to myself "I typically go by Lina."

By this time Charlie had finished hugging and interrogating Nessie and Jacob and turned to me pulling me into a bear hug that surprised me as well. "Hello there Lina."

"Hi there Charlie. How have you been?"

"Good, good…how's that daughter of mine doing?"

"Oh she's great as usual. She asked me to tell you hi and give you a hug for her."

"You too huh? I guess she told Ness the same thing. How about we take this all in the house though. It's pretty chilly out here." He said pulling his flannel coat closer to his body as he put his arm around my shoulder giving me a squeeze and leading me in through the front door.

We all made our way into the house and sat in the large living room. A random football game was playing on the big screen TV against the far wall and Charlie reached over to switch it off and talk. Sue apologized for Leah not being there mentioning that she had to work as she offered us coffee and other drinks and we sat and visited for an hour or so before the long day began to catch up to us. Nessie and Jake headed upstairs to their regular room with their luggage in hand. I knew that I was expected to stay here with Nessie and Jake, but I wasn't sure I could endure the possibility of hearing anymore make out sessions tonight, so I asked Seth if I could go with him to see his house since that was where he was headed. I halfway expected some argument from Charlie and Sue, but they just smiled and wished us a good night sleep as they walked us back out to the car.

We drove in silence holding hands and soaking up the comfort of being alone together as we made our way onto the reservation and toward the house he shared with Leah. We pulled out front to find it completely dark inside. Seth carried our bags to the front door and used his key to let us in. It was a cute little house but some of the decorations led me to believe that Seth and Leah hadn't done much redecorating after their mother moved out. I figured that it must have been comforting to have some things not change when their lives had gone through such massive transformations in such short amounts of time. Poor Seth and Leah had gone from being normal teenagers with regular lives to an instant later losing their father to a heart attack, both finding out that they were shape shifters and dealing with the trauma of learning how to control their phasing, Leah losing the love of her life when he imprinted on her own cousin, and then having their mother fall in love and re-marry a few years later. I really didn't think that a little familiarity was too much to ask. He took my hand and led me throughout the house showing me where the restroom was and what rooms were his and Leah's and the guest room that had once belonged to his parents, finally we went back to the living room and collapsed on the couch together as I cuddled up to his chest.

"Is it harder to accept leaving now that you're back home seeing all the things that you've ever known?"

He smiled and turned toward me kissing me on the forehead. "You are my home now. We live in the age of telephones and internet, so it's not like I can't keep in touch and the rest of this is just stuff...and who knows, we might come back here someday. Right now I'm more focused on my future than the past…focused on my life with you."

"Have I told you lately how much I love you Seth Clearwater?" I said smiling back up at him through heavy eyelids.

"Not in the past two hours." He said laughing. "You look completely exhausted Angel. Let's get you to bed…but here's the question….guest room or my room?"

"Doesn't matter to me as long as you're there with me!" I answered with a small smile and a wink.

"My room it is then," he said with a satisfied smile. "My bed might be smaller, but I really don't think even after all of these years that I could sleep with my girlfriend in my parents bed!"

I laughed as he pulled me up and led me with his hands at my waist down the hallway to his bedroom. He brought in my suitcase and left me to get dressed in peace not returning until I called down the hallway to let him know that I was ready. I climbed into the bed and watched the door, a sly smile spread across my face as he walked into the room wearing tight white tank top and plaid cotton shorts. My heart began so pick up pace a little as this handsome vision in pajamas crawled up the bed from the footboard area and held himself over me push up style while he gave me a quick kiss goodnight and then rolled over and shut off the light, rolling back to tuck me safely into his arms as we spooned on his relatively small bed. It didn't take us very long before I could feel Seth's chest expand and contract behind me as his steady breaths lulled me to sleep far better than any lullaby ever could.

* * *

**_Disclaimer: The Twilight Saga and it's characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I'm just borrowing them for a while :D_**

**_Author's Note: Well, I'm in the hospital (gall bladder surgery) and bored to tears. I finally felt good enough to write and finished this chapter. Hopefully it works okay, I am on pain meds afterall. First half was written before being in here and everything after arriving in Forks was this morning. Also I've decided that if I can make it work, I'm going to wrap up this part of the story in La Push and start a new one for the rest of my story. Please Reveiw and thanks for hanging in there! _**


	51. Chapter 51

**51. Sacrifices**

The bright sun was shining in my eyes through the separation between the brown tweed curtains in Seth's simple bedroom. I pulled the sheet over my eyes in an attempt to shield them from the intense glow only to find that I was way too hot to keep it over my face for long. Seth's intensely hot arm was still draped heavily over my waist and his body was still pressed to my back as his warm breath blew back and forth over my neck with each breath he took. A part of me didn't want to move for fear of disturbing his deep sleep, but I knew if I didn't move soon I was going to overheat so I slowly slid his arm up over my waist and to his side and tried to shimmy myself away from his body without waking him. I was almost out of the bed when I heard him grumble and reach his arm back around my waist pulling me back to my original position.

"Oh no you don't." he whispered kissing my shoulder chastely. He rolled me over to face him and I wrapped my arms around his shoulder and cuddled up to his chest returning the favor by gently kissing his neck and chest once. I was a lot more comfortable subjecting the front half of my body to his warmth and allowing my back to cool some as I nestled into his neck and sighed deeply inhaling his enticing scent. We laid there for the longest time just relaxing in his bed as he lazily rubbed his hand up and down my arm and across my back, occasionally kissing my forehead, cheek, and jaw.

"Ugh…I could stay here like this with you all day, but we really need to get moving. I have a feeling half the pack will be waiting in the front yard to meet you today." I looked up in horror, suddenly terrified at the prospect of meeting the pack today. Considering how Seth treated me and thought of me, I was suddenly terrified that I wouldn't even come close to meeting their expectations. He saw the look in my eyes and laughed as he kissed my forehead.

"Don't worry Angel. They're going to love you, it's nearly impossible not to like a pack mates imprint when you've already learned so much about them through the pack mind before you ever even meet them. They're already going to feel like they know you."

"They will? I….I didn't realize." I stuttered in surprise.

"Well yeah, sweetheart, anytime I phase, any other wolves who are phased at that same time know pretty much everything going on in each other's minds."

My eyes suddenly shot open and I sat straight up in the bed staring at Seth in horror. "Were there any other wolves phased the day we ran to the waterfall?"

Seth blushed slightly sitting up next to me, "When I first phased, yes, but they all phased back right away out of respect. A couple of them unknowingly popped in and out throughout the afternoon, but they all phased back pretty quickly. Thankfully there wasn't a need for active patrolling that day."

I looked a bit relieved, embarrassed by the fact that they might have overheard some of our discussions…that was until he continued as he lightly rubbed my arm in an attempt to comfort me. "You have to know though that, well, there isn't very much that can be kept private amongst a pack. We've all seen glimpses of one another's personal lives. We share a lot of unintentional thoughts and with imprints your head is so full of that person that you can't go very long at all without thinking about them…in every way possible."

I blushed a deep crimson. "You know, you'd think growing up in a house with Alice, Edward, and Jasper reading my thoughts, emotions, and future, not to mention everyone hearing every word I utter that I'd be used to this, but I guess it's the idea of people I've never met knowing such intimate things about our relationship. Wow…I just want to turn into an ostrich right now!" I yelped leaning forward burying my head in his chest.

He laughed openly as he pulled me back and tipped my chin up to look into my eyes. "I love you so much!" he said as he leaned forward and gently kissed my forehead, my nose, each of my cheeks, and then softly kissed my lips, his sweet smile never leaving his face. "The nice thing about the connection is that I can hear their reactions to my thoughts and I know for a fact that they're all already impressed with you. You don't have anything to be nervous about."

"All?" I asked with my eyebrows arched questioningly.

He gave me a crooked smile knowing exactly to whom I was referring. "Give her some time. She is my big sister after all, she has to be a little more selective right?"

"Is she here?" I asked trying to hear if we were still alone in the house, I couldn't hear her, but I also knew that his hearing was far more sensitive than my own.

He looked toward the doorway and focused and then frowned. "No, I don't think she is. She probably decided to go somewhere else when she heard that there were two of us in here not wanting to hear anything she wasn't ready for."

"Or she already hates me and wants to avoid me at all cost!" He rolled his eyes and scoffed at me shaking his head from side to side. He grabbed me and pulled me back down to lay on the bed as he leaned over me and kissed me again, this time showering my cheeks with kisses before getting up and making his way to the bedroom door.

"I'll let you get cleaned up and dressed while I make some breakfast." He said with a smile as he walked out the door closing it behind him.

I sat back up in bed and arched my back as I stretched. I rolled my neck letting it pop a few times before standing up and walking over to where my suitcase was laid out on the floor. I picked up my little toiletry bag and a change of clothes to go take my shower. As I stood up I looked around his room, really taking it in for the first time. It was a very simple room full of varying shades of brown. He had a full size bed that would barely be big enough to support two normal adults, but didn't provide nearly enough space for the height of a wolf boy, much less the both of us at the same time. Above the bed was a corkboard filled with pictures of the pack and me. I outnumbered the pack pics three to one. Some of the shots that hung there I never even knew he had. They had obviously been amongst the ones that Alice and Nessie had sent him before he came to see me. There were a few posters on the walls from different movies and a set of shelves on the far wall with dusty trophies and knickknacks. He had a single dresser, the top of which was covered with a few framed pictures of his friends, his family, and me. I picked up one of his family when they were all younger and I looked at the face of his father, Harry, who had the same tender eyes as Seth. Seth was only about ten in the picture and already had the sweetest, warmest smile I had ever seen. I ran my fingers over his sweet face before replacing the picture in its spot. I smiled wider as I picked up the frame in center that appeared to be made of a pearly shale material in the shape of a heart and contained the picture that I took of myself with my cell phone right before the play so that he could see my blonde hair. It was still my favorite picture of myself to date…even though I was completely exhausted when the picture was taken, there was still a glow on my face, the glow of a girl who was in love for the first time. I smiled as I placed it back on the dresser and turned to make my way out of the room and down the hallway to the bathroom.

I stepped into the small bathroom, relieved to see that Seth had laid out a towel and washcloth for me, and I turned on the shower to let the water heat up. I stepped in and let the steaming water hit my body relaxing the muscles in my back and neck. I stayed in the water a long time washing my hair with care and taking extra time to let the water work it's full magic on my muscles until the water began to run cool. I stepped out and dried off towel drying my hair and combing it quickly before getting dressed and stepping back out into the hallway. I was suddenly face to face with a panicked looking Seth.

"Oh My God! Are you okay? You need to go sit down!" He said sweeping me toward the living room and sitting me on the couch as he kneeled in front of me fanning me with a magazine.

I looked up at him laughing. "What's wrong honey? I'm fine!"

"You look like you've been boiled like a lobster! Your face and arms are so red!"

I laughed again reaching my hand up to his cheek. "Calm down sweetheart. I take really hot showers. I always look like this when I step out you just haven't stuck around long enough to see before or I'm already cooled down by the time I come downstairs for you to see me!"

He shook his head at me, his eyes still looking panicked. "That can't be healthy!"

I shrugged. "Hasn't killed me yet. I don't feel clean unless I've had the hottest shower I can stand. Bella says she was the same way and we inherited it from Renee."

He took both of my cheeks in his hands again still looking concerned, but no longer panicked. "Are you absolutely sure you're okay?"

I smiled at him and pulled him forward for a soft kiss as I whispered against his lips, "Yes dear, I'm fine." And then I turned my head to kiss him a little more passionately moving my hands into his hair as his reached around me roaming my back and combing through my damp hair.

We kissed for a few more minutes before he remembered that my breakfast was getting cold. He took my dirty clothes and toiletry bag from my hands and led me to the table to sit in the seat he had waiting for me. He had made me my favorite French toast again with bacon and orange juice. I took a bite thanking him profusely as he made his way out of the room and down to take a shower of his own.

After I finished my breakfast I walked over to the sink to quickly wash my plate and made my way back down the hallway to Seth's room to grab my blow dryer and make up to finish getting ready. I was almost to the door when I came face to face with a wet Seth wearing nothing but a towel around his waist with another towel draped over his head as he attempted to dry his hair. I froze unable to take my hungry eyes away from the most appealing sight I had ever seen standing in front of me as my eyes repeatedly scanned the nicely defined muscles of his chest and abdomen, glittered with tiny droplets of water, that rippled under his russet skin with the motion of arms and body. He froze too and our eyes locked for a second, both of us flushing in the mixture of embarrassment and excitement of the moment.

It couldn't have been more than a few seconds, but it felt like an eternity that we stood there looking at each other knowing we should keep moving apart, but unable to will our bodies to comply. I had a nearly irresistible urge to run up to him and throw my arms around his neck and start something that I knew we wouldn't ever be able to stop, but somehow I resisted. He stepped toward me like he was resisting a similar impulse and then we both mumbled a soft 'sorry' to one another as I turned to make my way back to the living room and he rushed to the door of his room closing it swiftly behind him.

I sat on the couch as my heart pounded in my chest and my breath accelerated in and out of my chest cavity. Even though he wasn't in front of me anymore, I still had the urge to go back to him to touch his chest, to run my fingers through the wet locks of hair hanging over his forehead. Finally I couldn't take it anymore, I stood back up and walked to Seth's door and raised my hand to knock just as the door swung open and Seth was standing there wearing a pair of jeans, but still shirtless and with wet hair. I stood there with my mouth open hand poised in the air to knock, still unsure of what I was doing when he reached down and pulled me up lifting me off the floor so we were face to face. He placed a deep passionate kiss on my lips as my hand poised in the hair weaved through his hair and the other found its way to cup his cheek. He pulled me into the room and slammed the door behind him with his foot.

We were suddenly lost in our own little whirlwind of passionate kisses as we twirled to his bed. Our common sense totally abandoned us as my legs wrapped around his waist and we clutched each other close, our mouths hungrily kissing, tasting, and exploring each other's necks and collarbones as my hands moved down to caress his shoulders and chest. To both of our pleasure my neck did not seem to be ticklish today, and instead of laughter, the touch of his lips was met with a small moan. The intensity of our movements increased as we suddenly found our bodies pressing closer together trying to eliminate all space separating them. Our breathing was shallow and gasping as the passion overtook all other senses. Our mouths found each other again and we kissed long and deep, moaning in unison as my hands returned back to the dark curls of Seth's wet hair as his hands slid under the hem of my shirt and I could feel his warm hands on my bare back his left hand clamped over my shoulder and his right hand rubbing up and down with delicious friction. If it hadn't been for the sound of a car door closing outside, I'm not sure if we would have had the will power to stop. We froze at the sound of the metal on metal out front looking each other in the face. The shock had not been enough to completely eliminate the hunger still evident in both of our eyes, but thankfully it was enough to pull us apart.

I unwrapped myself quickly from his body and rushed over to my suitcase to grab my blow dryer and make up bag and run to the restroom. Seth rushed to the dresser and grabbed out a shirt and made his way to the living room to see who had arrived. I splashed cold water on my face before I began working on drying my hair with the handheld dryer. My expressions kept flipping back and forth between embarrassment and longing for more as the memory of what had just transpired between Seth and I repeated over and over in my mind. I couldn't stop it no matter how hard I tried and I was suddenly able to see how difficult it would be for the pack to keep such thoughts from each other when just this one was so hard to suppress. I also realized that they all knew such things about each other and it was just a part of loving Seth that I would just have to deal with and get used to. It was really a small sacrifice in comparison to all he had to endure to be with me. By the time I was done drying my hair and applying my make up I had found a new peace about the whole thing, and I was finally feeling that I was not only ready, but excited to meet the pack. I had also made up my mind it was probably best that we, or if he wasn't willing then I, should sleep at Sue and Charlie's the rest of the trip.

I walked into the living room to find that Charlie, Sue, Jake, and Nessie were all there and had brought along boxes to help Seth start packing things into. They said that we were going to take care of the business first and then the rest of our trip could be devoted to fun. Thanks to my family's generous gifts, there wasn't too terribly much that Seth was going to have to take with him, which was nice because then he could leave everything else for Leah. We all worked the rest of the morning taking a break for lunch and then finished in the early afternoon packing all of Seth's belongings that were coming back home with us and piling them in his bedroom. The bed was already covered in boxes by the time I had joined in the effort, so I assumed that Seth had already reached the same decision that I had that we should spend the rest of the trip sleeping at Sue and Charlie's just to be safe.

By the time we were finished packing all of Seth's belongings, Leah still hadn't made an appearance. We loaded our suitcases in the car and I walked back up to the door with Seth as he went to take one more look around the house that he grew up in before locking the door. I reached up and placed my hands on his shoulders and laid my cheek against his back as a show of support. I couldn't help but feel bad that he was letting so much of his life go in order to be with me. He was sacrificing so much and I hadn't given anything up at all yet. I placed a loving kiss on his shoulder blade as he sighed and pulled the door to the house closed turning the key in the deadbolt and then spinning around pulling me into a hug and resting his cheek on the top of my head as we slowly walked to the car. We reached the car and as he opened the car door for me I looked up at him one last time.

"Are you absolutely sure you want to do this sweetheart? I just feel bad that you're giving up so much."

He smiled down at me and rubbed my cheekbone with the back of his index finger. "Yes Angel, I'm sure. It would be much harder to leave you."

I rocked up on my toes and gently placed my hands on each side of his face as I placed a gentle kiss on his lips. "I love you. Someday I'll make sure you know it was all worth it."

He smiled down at me. "I already do, every minute I'm with you I know that you are worth it all. Am I going to be spending the rest of my life trying to convince you of that?"

I attempted to smile back as I slid into my seat and then shrugged as tears filled my eyes. Even with all I had seen, even with Nessie and Jake helping him show me what he felt when he fell in love with me and how that had increased when he imprinted on me, I still had a hard time understanding how I could be worth all that he was giving up. I guess it came from years and years of practice at not believing more of myself than this, but I still just didn't see how I could be such a great prize.

He kneeled down by my side of the car and wiped the tears away with his finger, "Oh my Angel, why are you crying?"

"I don't know. I…I just feel so bad taking you away from everyone here…your Mom, your sister, the pack. They all love you too. I just don't feel like I'm worth all of the pain I'm causing everyone around you."

"Trust me, sweetheart, they all understand…more than you will ever know. Please don't cry." He pulled me into a hug.

I felt ridiculous sitting here crying when he was the one saying goodbye to his childhood home. I started laughing as I wiped away the tears and he pulled back looking confused again. "Look at me, you're the one saying goodbye and I'm the one blubbering like a baby! I'm sorry. I'm such a dork. Just ignore me okay?"

He kissed me on the forehead. "I love you my little dork. Now please stop crying so I can take you and show you off around my res."

I smiled lightly and let him close the door for me as I pulled down the make up mirror and examined the damage. I pulled a little compact out of my purse and reapplied some powder under my eyes and tried to smooth things out as he climbed in the driver's side. A few minutes later we were pulling in front of Charlie and Sue's house to see that the street out front was crowded with parked cars and the sights and sounds of a party were emanating from the back yard. I looked over at Seth surprised.

"The pack decided to surprise us with a barbeque." He smiled at me as he reached over and kissed my hand. Before I could respond my car door was open and I was being assisted out of the car by a large set of hands.

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters.**


	52. Chapter 52

**52. Whirlwind of Introductions**

The large hands that assisted me out of the car I soon found were attached to Sam Uley. Once I was balanced on my feet he took my hands in his own and shook them excitedly. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you in person Lina."

"It's a pleasure to meet you too Sam." Sam appeared to be in his thirties now. According to Seth, he and the other older married members of the pack had begun to share leadership responsibilities in an attempt to stretch out times between phasing to allow them to age to a degree in order to keep up with their wives ages.

Sam's wife Emily stood next to him, smiling at me so warmly that it gave me instant comfort. I had seen pictures of Sam and Emily with their family, but pictures did no justice to the sweetness and sincerity that were tucked behind Emily's warm dark eyes. Emily reached over and gave me a long inviting hug. She kept her arm around my shoulder as she led me toward the yard. "It's so nice to meet you Lina. We've all heard so much about you. Did you have a nice trip?"

It was hard not to feel comfortable with Emily. "Yes, the trip was amazing. You guys live in a beautiful part of the country. It's practically intoxicating!"

She laughed, "Good, maybe then some day you and Seth might end up back here when you've seen enough of the rest of the world."

"Maybe." I whispered with a blush. I looked around to find Seth and was relieved to see that he was just a couple of steps behind me talking to Sam and Jake; Nessie, Charlie, and Sue were following behind them. He saw me look back and smiled at me when I caught his eye. Just then we rounded the side of the house and the full force of the festivities in the back yard crashed into my senses. The party in front of me could easily rival an Alice event. I hadn't realized quite how large Charlie and Sue's property was, as the field behind the house stretched for nearly a quarter of a mile back to the tree line. There were lanterns strung back and forth above the lawn up near the house with a couple dozen tables set up underneath and three humongous grills spitting smoke and leaving the mouthwatering scent of roasting pork, beef, and chicken hanging in the air. Beyond the tables was a quasi dance floor with a large stereo blasting dance music so loud you could practically feel the bass beat in your feet. Then further back on the property a large bonfire was burning in a fire circle that was surrounded by a group of children appearing to be stair steps in age from toddler to teenage all roasting hot dogs in the red and gold flames as a few of their parents hovered protectively nearby.

We took a few more steps into the open back yard and were suddenly the center of everyone's attention. A crowd began to form around us as everyone came forward to introduce themselves. Their faces and names were a blur as I was quickly introduced to Jared, his wife Kim and their three kids; Paul, Rachel, who was Jake's sister, and their three kids; Embry, his wife Andrea, and their three kids; I started to get a bit nervous when I noticed that every single one of the older pack members each seemed to have three kids. Not only that but as the kids lined up again in front of the fire it seemed that each year one of the couples would have one kid so that between the four oldest married pack members there were sixteen kids ranging in age from fourteen to four in a nearly perfect set of stair steps from youngest to oldest.

I was especially taken aback when Sam and Emily introduced their children, Levi, Sadie, and Evan. Levi I had been told had just turned fourteen and seemed to have grown and aged quite a bit in the five months since the pictures that Jake had taken from his and Nessie's visit in the summer. Levi looked me in the eye for a long time and then sort of blushed as he reached out to shake my hand and said in little more than a whisper, "You must be Seth's Angel. It's very nice to meet you."

My eyes widened when he called me 'Seth's Angel' knowing that Seth was the only one to ever refer to me as Angel and I glanced quickly toward Seth who nodded and then I returned my gaze to Levi and smiled as warmly as I could manage at him. "It's very nice to meet you Levi. You've grown a lot since the last time I saw pictures of you from this summer."

He smiled and nodded and moved on to go back to the fire, but every once in a while throughout the rest of the night I would notice his gaze on me. Seth later explained that Levi started phasing soon after Jake and Nessie had left and that sometimes the younger pack members who were newer to the whole pack mind thing sometimes developed crushes on some of the other member's imprints. It was kind of hard not to when your mind was constantly inundated with how wonderful and amazing and beautiful the imprint was all day every day.

We slowly made our way through the crowd and ended up out by the bonfire so I could warm myself by the fire. Most of the wives and kids I later found spent most of the night near the bonfire. The temperature was never a problem for the wolves though.

Out by the fire I met Chloe, Brady's wife who was struggling to wrangle their three-year-old twins Brandon and Brooklyn while trying to keep from waking one-year-old Bailey sleeping in her arms. After a few minutes she asked if I would be willing to hold the baby while she chased down the screaming duo, which I was more than happy to oblige. I held the precious baby girl in my arms wrapped in sweet smelling soft blankets. She slept so soundly, not seeming to even notice the chaos and noise around her. After a few minutes she shifted and I was worried she would wake up, but instead she cuddled closer to my chest and moved her thumb up to her mouth and began to suck contentedly. I stared in awe down at the little russet miracle in my arms with her sweet round cheeks and curly black hair and sighed. I had a few fuzzy dreams about having kids some day with Seth, but holding this precious little angel baby in my arms, it seemed like it really could be a reality some day. I reached my free hand up and gently grazed her cheek with my finger and then jumped as I suddenly heard a voice boom from behind me.

"Oh…better be careful Seth. Looks like she's already getting the baby bug!"

I spun quickly to see a face I instantly recognized as Quil Ateara from the Jake's photos standing a few feet away next to his wife Claire, who appeared to be expecting soon herself. Seth, Ness, and Jake were all standing nearby and Seth was looking at me with a tear in his eye, his smile so wide and warm that it made my heart melt. I had a feeling that seeing me holding the baby had the same effects on him as it had me. Just then Chloe came back over and thanked me for holding the baby and took her gracefully back in her arms and headed back up toward the house with both toddlers in tow. I watched them walk away and then got up and walked over to Seth and pulled myself into his chest as he hugged his warm arms around my shoulders and kissed me on the top of my head.

"So, we finally get to meet the long obsessed over Angelina…and the obsession started long before you actually imprinted on her too!" He added elbowing Seth waggling his eyebrows at him suggestively. Seth elbowed him back.

Quil leaned forward then acting as though he were sniffing the air around me. "I don't know how you can ever get used to the vampire stench coming off of her though. She reeks of the whole clan almost as strongly as she would if she were one herself!"

Seth opened his mouth to respond, but I cut him off. "Well Quil, after twelve years of living with them at least_ I_ have some excuse, but I think the bigger question here would be why is it that_ you_ smell like a sixty year old man who bathes in Old Spice?"

Everyone around us broke into roaring laugher and Quil flushed a little in reaction. It was a well-known and long time joke that Quil indulged far too much in his various bottles of aftershave and cologne that it had led to ongoing teasing that his sense of smell was even less acute than human. He finally recovered after a while when he realized that even Claire was laughing so hard that tears were rolling down her face. He turned to me and smiled nodding slightly, "Okay Lina, you got me. A dig for a dig…Not bad kid, not bad."

The boys returned to their conversations as Claire and I found ourselves being drawn closer to the fire again by the chill of the wind. We sat on a bench and talked a while. I really liked Claire. She was very sweet and down to earth. Quil and Claire's relationship had been one of legend in the pack when Quil had imprinted on her when she was only two years old. He took care of her, being the best older brother type figure for years, the ultimate protector, guardian, and friend. It wasn't until she turned sixteen and they were suddenly the same age physically that they began to have more romantic feelings for one another. They were married last year after she had turned eighteen.

"So, how long before the baby comes?" I asked her excitedly.

"I have three more months left. I can't wait." She said cradling her stomach protectively with a warm glow on her face.

"Do you know what you're having?"

"It's a boy. The first borns of the pack usually are you know…actually Collin was the only one who had a girl first."

"Oh, no, I didn't know that. Um, so do you guys have a name picked out yet?"

"We're still debating. He wants to name him Quil the third and call him Trey. I'm not sure just yet. I would sort of like to name him Nathaniel after my father."

"I like both of those. I'm sure you guys will decide in time." I smiled at her suddenly excited for the future. "I'm so excited for you guys."

She smiled at me warmly, "I'm excited for you too. Seth is such a good guy. You really are lucky and it's just such an amazing thing to be the object of imprinting. You're in for an exceptionally happy future with him."

"I know…I am so lucky." I said staring across the fire at my beautiful Seth. He looked up as if he heard me and smiled then he said something to the rest of the guys he was talking with and walked around the fire to me offering me his hand and pulling me up into his arms as he threw Claire a warm hello. He pulled me a few steps back from the fire, reached down tucking my hair behind my ears and over my shoulders, and then tenderly rubbed my cheeks with his thumbs before reaching down and gently caressing my lips with his own. He reached his arms down around my waist and hugged me close as he whispered, "I love you." into my ear. I whispered, "I love you too." And we held each other swaying gently back and forth in the glow of the firelight for a few minutes.

Our moment was abruptly interrupted by a yell from the house. "Grub's on!" Suddenly there was a stampede of bodies amassing near the tables that held the food up by the house.

Seth grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the house. "We better hurry or there won't be any left for either one of us!" he said with a laugh and I followed willingly joining him in line. We were in line in front of Collin and his wife Lily. They had two beautiful daughters. Daisy was two and Violet was only six months old. We stood and talked in line as we waited. I commented how much I loved the girls being named after flowers and just then little Violet reached for me. Her parents looked surprised and then let her move into my arms.

"She never goes to anybody! I can't believe that she just reached for you like that!" Lily said still in shock as Violet looked up at me and smiled. She reached her chubby little hand up and grabbed my nose and giggled. She started cooing at me and laughing as she grabbed my hair and my chin as we played our way through the line. Her parents just kept watching in amazement as we carried on our own little private conversation. Seth just watched with a warm smile as I thoroughly enjoyed my interaction with the precious little one. I had never gotten any opportunities to interact with babies, so this was all so new and fun for me. I soaked up every moment eagerly.

When we finally reached the front of the line I gave her back to her mother and instantly Violet began to cry reaching for me again. Her mother tried to calm her, but she was inconsolable. Finally I took her back and she was happy again. I shrugged and so did Lily. We adjusted and Seth filled a plate for me as we went through the line and I ate with the sweet baby girl still happily attached to my hip. After I finished eating she got hungry and her mother let me feed her the bottle that she had ready for the hungry baby. After she finished I propped her up on my shoulder as her mother instructed and burped her before she drifted off to sleep cuddled up to my chest. After her mother was adequately convinced that she was fully asleep she took her back from me apologizing for the inconvenience. I told her that it was no inconvenience at all and I actually really enjoyed it. We sat and talked a little bit longer before they decided it was getting late and they needed to get the little ones home. They both told me that they were glad to meet me and hugged me before they loaded up their gear to leave.

Seth put his arm around me and hugged me close, rubbing my arms with his hands to help warm me up. "It was so amazing watching you with those kids tonight. You're such a natural mom…you know that?" he said turning me to face him.

"I'm amazed at how easily it all came to me. I never got to be around babies."

He hugged me close again and kissed my forehead. "You're going to make an absolutely amazing mother some day."

"I hope so." I whispered.

"You will." He whispered back in my ear as he gently kissed my earlobe before nibbling it slightly. He drew his lips back up across my jaw line, pausing to place gentle kisses every few centimeters until reaching my lips. He lingered there gently caressing my lips with his then he pulled back and took my hands pulling me up to stand and leading me out onto the empty dance floor. He pulled my arms around his neck and then slid his hands back down my arms and ribs to my waist and reached behind my back to pull me closer as he leaned down and laid his cheek against mine and swayed gently back and forth to the slow song on the stereo. I closed my eyes and relaxed in his arms. I was vaguely aware that other couples had joined us on the dance floor, but I really didn't pay attention…all I could feel was my Seth's warm strong arms around me.

After a long while he slid back slightly so we were nose to nose looking into each other's eyes. "So what do you think of my world?" he whispered.

"I like it. I feel comfortable here." I whispered back.

"I told you that they would all like you."

I frowned for a second. "Still no Leah though…"

"She's coming, don't worry. She's not a big fan of these things."

"Too hard to be around all of the happy families?"

He looked me in the eye with a sadness there that I hadn't seen before as he nodded solemnly. He hurt for his sister and that made me hurt even more for her too.

"So wait…this isn't the bonfires that Nessie told me about is it? I thought they took place out on the beach."

"Oh no, this is just a barbeque. Don't worry, you'll see the real thing before we leave. They're doing a special bonfire for us on New Year's Eve this year." He said smiling at my attention to detail.

"Cool, I'm excited to hear some of these tribe legends in person!"

He reached down and kissed my lips in appreciation and then pulled me back to dance cheek to cheek again. After a few minutes I pulled back again with more questions.

"Hey Seth…I'm confused." He raised his eyebrows at me waiting for me to continue. "How does the whole pack thing work these days. Nessie and Jake have told me stories in the past about when she was born and you guys split and you and Leah stayed with Jake and then you could only hear your own immediate pack's thoughts and only the leaders could communicate, but now everyone hears your thoughts again, but so can Jake. How does that all work?"

He nodded understanding my confusion. "Well, it's kind of funny, over time we've learned how to work the system and actually I'm still officially part of Jake's pack, so I can still hear Jake and Leah, but I'm sort of a loaner to Sam's pack, so we can all hear each other too. It was a strained compromise that we all made when Jake moved away so that those of us in his pack could still help protect the tribe. Leah was the only one who wasn't part of the loan situation due to her unique situation with Sam."

"So that makes poor Leah even more of an outcast…the only girl, in an impossible situation, not able to be a part of the rest of the pack like everyone else, hasn't imprinted, and can't seem to let her temper go enough to move on with her life." Tears began to well in my eyes and run silently down my cheeks. Seth looked down at me tenderly and kissed them away.

He pulled me so tight against him I could barely breathe and kissed me again and again on the head. "My God, how did I get so lucky? I love you so much. Thank you for caring so much about my sister even though you've never even met her." He placed another kiss on my forehead before touching it to his own. His voice broke a little as he mumbled, "I thank God every day for you." smothering more kisses on my wet cheeks and forehead.

I leaned my head back and moved my hand through the hair at the nape of his neck and leaned on my tip toes to kiss his lips. His lips moved with mine as he pulled me tighter in his arms lifting me off my feet and swaying with me to the music. After a few seconds he put me back down and pulled away with a smile on his face then he looked up toward the bonfire and then back down to me.

"Well, are you ready? Here's your chance to finally meet my big sis. She's here and she's waiting by the bonfire for us."

I hugged him a little tighter around the neck for a second to gather courage and then reached for his hand as he led me toward a bench by the bonfire where his sister sat waiting for us. I was praying in the back of my mind that she would like me. _Please let her like me._

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **


	53. Chapter 53

**53. Well, That Could Have Gone Better…**

My heart sped a little faster with ever foot closer to Leah that we crossed. She sat focusing her gaze on the fire trying not to look at the rest of the festivities around her. I was instantly struck by how incredibly beautiful she was. Her pictures never came close to doing her justice. Her long black hair hung straight and soft like silk down past her bottom. My mouth dropped open as we got close enough to really see the full detail of her beauty. She totally could have been a model for suntan lotion with the dark complexion of her face accentuated by high cheekbones and a small perfectly straight nose that was proportioned perfectly with her large almond shaped eyes. Her beauty was only slightly marred by the cynicism that lurked behind her beautiful eyes and caused her full perfect lips to turn down in the corners in what I suspected was a nearly perpetual glower. As we approached she looked up and her gaze focused on our hands for a second before turning to my face. I recognized the emotions burning behind her eyes, I had felt them myself many times when inundated with the sight of my overly affectionate family members, it was unmistakably a mixture of envy and frustration and a touch of something I wasn't sure of too…perhaps mistrust.

"I take it you're Lina." She sneered curtly.

"Yes, it's nice to meet you Leah." I saw Jake and Nessie appear behind her in the shadows and I relaxed a little with the additional moral support as I reached out my hand to greet her. My relaxation was short lived however when my gesture was rebuffed as she turned back to the fire. I slowly pulled my hand back to my side as I felt Seth's grip stiffen on my hand defensively. I squeezed back and sent him a look telling him it was okay and then I let go and went to sit on the far end of the bench that she was inhabiting and stared into the fire with her. Seth stood behind me a moment until I motioned for him to go stand next to Jake and Nessie. He hesitated and then made his way over to them and sat next to them on a downed tree trunk.

We sat there in the quiet for a long time. I wasn't sure what to say. I just stared at the fire and prayed I would find the right words that wouldn't tick her off. Finally I sighed and just started saying what was on my heart.

"Okay Leah, I really don't know what to say here. I'd like to get to know you better, but if you don't want that then that's okay. I just want you to know that I love your brother, with all of my heart. He is the single greatest thing that has ever happened to me and I want to make him happy. He loves you so much and you are so important to him and that makes you important to me. It doesn't have to be today or tomorrow or anytime soon, but I hope that someday we can learn to be friends. He's told me a little bit about what all you have been through," when I said this her head snapped at me and fire much hotter than the bonfire burned in her eyes, I stammered a second and continued. "I can't imagine how hard it has all been for you and it breaks my heart." Tears began to flow from my eyes as I once again imagined what life must be like for her, "I hope that someday you can find the answers you are looking for, but until then I hope you can learn to put aside your frustrations with the universe in order to allow me to be a part of your life through your brother."

Her eyes squinted at me a few times as the anger inside her burned under the surface of her face. I could almost see the venom filling the words inside her head as she formulated her response. She finally opened her mouth and spit out at me the response she was building, "You don't know anything about me Suzie Sunshine. You think everything's all happiness and hormones in your perfect little existence with your lousy bloodsucker family. My brother might be able to look past the way you were raised, but don't make the mistake to think that I ever will." She stopped for a second and glanced over my shoulder to look at Seth and her expression softened ever so slightly as she narrowed her eyes looking back at me, "Okay, I'll admit that you make my brother happy, happier than I've ever seen him in fact, but you're both living in some little fantasy world. You love your family and he loves his and when it all comes down to it, our families just don't mix well. You're going to choose to live your happy little life with your bloodsuckers and he's going to happily follow you wherever you want to go because you're his imprint and just like Jake he'll forsake us all for you."

I sat with my mouth hanging open and tears stinging my eyes. Everything I had feared that he was giving up and choosing, Leah was confirming in one short speech. "I…I don't." I sputtered trying to deny her accusations.

"Oh don't even try to act all innocent and deny it cupcake. You're already doing it. You're sitting here all high and mighty telling me that you're part of my brother's life basically whether I like it or not and you hope that we can be friends." She said raising her voice mockingly. "Well, I'll tell you right now, you and me…we will never be friends so just forget about it. I hate you! I hate all of you, but I hate you the most for taking away the last thing that I have in this life!"

I was sobbing trying to think of something to say, something to soothe the hate she had for me for stealing her brother from her, something to anesthetize the pain of so many years of rejection that she felt that she was now directing all on me. Suddenly I felt Seth's arms around me shielding me from her as he protectively growled at his sister.

"Was that really necessary!" He barked defensively.

The fire burned brighter in Leah's eyes as I looked up at her helplessly. "Seth, stop…It's okay. She has a right to her feelings. She has good reason to hate me." I whispered to him with my eyes locked on hers. This only infuriated her more.

"Fine choose this weak pathetic vampire wannabe over your family Seth! She'll only leave you sad and alone!" She yelled as she stormed off into the forest bursting into a mass of fur just before she was completely behind the tree line. Jake took off right behind her.

I turned my face into Seth's chest sobbing as he stroked my hair apologizing over and over for what his sister had said. I tried to hear him, but her words kept repeating in my head over and over, "_you're both living in some little fantasy world…just like Jake he'll forsake us all for you….I hate you the most for taking away the last thing that I have in this life!"_ Finally I sniffed and looked up at him in a panic. "What are you still doing here? You need to go after her? Talk to her! She needs you Seth!"

"But you need me more. Leah's going to be Leah, talking to her won't change 17 years of anger. What she said hurt you, I want to be here for you."

This time the fire burned in my eyes as I realized that there really was truth in what she was saying. "No Seth. I NEED you to go take care of your sister. I'm a big girl. Sticks and stones and all that, but being rebuffed by your brother is the worst pain of all." I reached up and touched his cheek the fire fading and quickly replaced with love, "Please, baby. Go talk to Leah. I'll be fine…and don't let Jake yell at her either."

"Are you sure?" He asked running his fingers down my cheek before glancing back toward the forest.

I leaned up and kissed his lips, "Absolutely." He kissed me one last time and then turned to run for the forest beginning to strip his outer layers of clothing just as he hit the tree line.

I turned to look into the fire as I felt a gentle arm wrap around me. I recognized instantly from the scent that it was Nessie. She pulled my head to her shoulder and stroked my cheek as she showed me images of the past. Her own encounters with Leah, the reasons that Leah felt the way she did.

"I don't hate her Ness. I really don't need to see more reasons to feel sorry for her. I actually do understand. The thing that hurts most is that I know she's right."

"No, she's not." Ness showed me more images, images of Leah's mother, of her friendships with girls at work, of her going into the city for nights out with her friends.

"That may be Ness, but Charlie is there in her relationship with her Mom changing things and work friends will never be able to replace the life she had with her family…her family before vampires walked in and shuffled the cards of her fate into an unrecognizable jumble of loss. Of all the people who ever had a reason to hate vampires and anyone involved with them, it would be Leah."

A little while later Sue came over and put her arm around my shoulder apologizing for Leah as she led me toward the house to warm up inside and wash my face. I told her that I understood why Leah was upset and she wasn't entirely wrong. "Nonsense Lina. You know Seth has been through just as much as Leah has. He's been alone all this time just like she has. Granted he didn't have the whole Sam aspect of the situation, but besides that he's suffered just as much as she has and he deserves to finally be happy. I am so glad that he found his mate in such a sweet girl as you. I will be proud to someday call you my daughter." She said kissing my hair as we walked in the back door of the house and through the living room.

Nessie followed us in silence as Sue led me upstairs to the bathroom and showed me which room Seth and I would be staying in tonight. My eyebrows shot up reflexively when she said 'the room you and Seth will be sleeping in' and she smiled, "Dear, you're his imprint, like I could bear to torture him by making him sleep on the couch. I know you'll both be respectful of our home." I nodded and she left Ness and I alone in the room that would be mine to share with Seth for the rest of the trip.

Nessie sat with me for a while brushing my hair and helping me put away my clothes so that the wrinkles would fall out. Occasionally one of the pack boys or their wives would wander upstairs to check on me assuring me that Leah was wrong and that she'd come around eventually. Each one of them was full of such genuine concern and compassion that I found it hard not to believe them at least a little. After a while I finally told Nessie that I was tired and ready for bed. I got ready in peace as the last of the party noises died down outside and quietly crawled into the bed. In the quiet of the night the memory of the things Leah said came back with a vengeance and my silent tears returned to my eyes and drenched my pillow as I cried myself to sleep.

I wasn't sure what time it was when I felt Seth crawl into bed behind me and cuddle up to my back wrapping his arm around my waist and placing gentle kisses on my shoulder. The queen size guest bed was far more comfortable than his tiny full size one had been and we were both able to stretch out comfortably next to one another. I let him place a few more kisses on my shoulder before I rolled over to face him wrapping my arm around his rib cage and burying my face in his neck as the tears involuntarily began to pool at the corners of my eyes. I took a deep stabilizing breath, but my trembling arms and gave me away. Seth pulled my face back and kissed my tears humming a tune and stroking my hair with his free hand.

After a few minutes I regained my composure and pulled back to look him in the face. Even in the dim moonlight I could still see the exhaustion on his face and that his face was also damp. Suddenly no longer worried about my own feelings I reached up and wiped the tears away with my fingers and caressed his face with my palm. "What happened sweetheart?" I asked as I sat up leaning against the headboard.

He shrugged pulling himself up next to me and hugging me to his chest, "We finally caught up to her. It was hard because she's a lot faster than all the rest of us. She had run until she just couldn't anymore and collapsed. I think we were all the way into Canada when she finally stopped. She's really hurting, but it really doesn't have anything to do with you personally, just more what you represent. If it's any consolation you gained some major respect points with her for sending me to find her. But in a way it also made it worse…that you had to practically order me to follow her. I don't think there will be any easy answers with all of this. I do think she's sorry for being quite so mean to you, she actually had managed to avoid phasing the past few months and she really hadn't caught much more beyond the infatuation phase with us. She really didn't know all the much about you yet besides the few things that had filtered though via Jake over the years. Anyway, if you happen to bump into her again before we leave you might end up getting an apology, but I don't think she's planning on seeing you again if she can help it."

"That's okay. Like I told her, we have time and hopefully someday things will change, but it needs to happen at a pace that she can handle."

I heard him let out a sigh as he squeezed me tighter and stroked my hair with his large warm hand. He kissed the top of my head as he whispered again how amazing I was and then he reached down and turned my face up toward his as he reached down and placed a long soft kiss on my lips. We teased back and forth for a little bit with our tongues before exhaustion took over and we slid back down under the covers with my head still snuggled to his chest and drifted off into silent slumber.

That night I dreamed of children, lots of children, running and playing in a playground. All of them with the unique skin tones of the kids I had seen today. I recognized a few faces amongst the crowd playing around me. In the small sandbox the five youngest pack babies played happily with sand toys, as Brady's twins took turns dumping buckets over one another's heads. On the swings Sadie Uley pushed her little brother Evan happily as he yelled for her to push higher. In the next swing Jacob's niece Becky was trying to get her little brother Jack to stop crying and let her see his skinned knee. Isaiah, Olivia, and Uriah Call were playing chase nearby with Jared's middle and youngest kids Katie, and Kevin. Behind them standing against the fence Levi Uley, Jared's oldest son Kyle, and Jacob's oldest nephew Will all stared behind me with angry looks as they shook uncontrollably, fighting the urge to phase. I turned quickly to see a sea of black cresting the hill on the horizon heading for the playground where the pack children played. I turned to yell for them to run, to go find a place to hide, but they couldn't hear me. I could see their parents standing behind them looking on in horror at what was heading for their children, but the black mass was coming too quickly, there was no way to get them away in time. I ran to grab little Violet and run, but just before I could reach her a cold hand grabbed me from behind yanking me off my feet and sending me sailing into the sea of dark cloaks.

I woke up screaming thrashing in the bed as Seth sat next to me trying desperately to calm me down. Suddenly the door flew open and Jake and Nessie were standing next to the bed behind Seth, Charlie and Sue followed shortly. Suddenly I snapped out of it realizing I was in the safety of Sue and Charlie's spare bedroom. I burst into tears and collapsed into Seth's chest sobbing so hard I was on the verge of hyperventilating. Seth rubbed my back and hair trying desperately to calm me so I could tell him what was wrong. Finally Nessie sat next to me and placed her hand on my arm showing me scenes of safety and calm and I was finally able to stop crying and calm down. They all sat on the bed and listened as I retold my nightmare. Jake, Nessie, and Seth all stared at me wide eyed, as their understanding of what I was describing was far more a reality to them than for Sue and Charlie. When I was done Sue and Charlie nodded and patted me on the shoulder before leaving the room satisfied it was just a nightmare. The other three sat with me in silence knowing that this was not the first dream of this type I had ever experienced and that there was always the possibility that it was more than simply a dream. Jake and Ness finally left us to get ready and I slowly turned to Seth.

"Are Kyle and Will phasing now too?"

Seth looked at me and nodded silently as he reached out and pulled me to his chest with a sigh. "Whatever happens, whenever it happens, we'll face it together."

I hugged him tighter and leaned up to kiss his mouth before finally forcing myself to get up and go get cleaned up for the day.

* * *

**Disclaimer: The Twilight Series and all original characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer.**

I decided it might help you guys out to have an index of the families to help when you read chapters 52 and 53. I also posted it on my profile.

_Wolf Pack Family Index:_

Pack Member…..Spouse/Imprint……Children and ages

**Sam…………….Emily………………Levi 14, Sadie 10, Evan 7**

**Jared……………Kim……………….Kyle 13, Katie 11, Kevin 8**

**Paul…………….Rachel (Jake's sis)…Will 12, Becky 9, Jack 5 (Named after Rachels dad, sis, and bro)**

**Embry………….Andrea……………..Isaiah 10, Olivia 6, Uriah 4 (My stupid little joke...it's all the vowels A,E,I,O,and U)**

**Jacob …………..Nessie**

**Quil…………….Claire………………(Expecting due in 3 months)**

**Leah**

**Seth……………..Lina**

**Brady…………...Chloe………………Brandon, Brooklyn (3 y/o twins), Bailey1**

**Collin……………Lily………………...Daisy 2, Violet 6 months **


	54. Chapter 54

**54. Sight Seeing and Sliding Up to Second**

After I finished with my shower I picked up my cell phone and dialed the number for home. My father answered the phone. It was so good to hear his voice; just the sound gave me a sense of peace. We talked about my trip so far and we talked about my nightmare. Thankfully Nessie and Jake had called right away to tell them about it and check to see if Alice saw anything fishy with the Volturi's future disappearing, and thankfully they had a full docket for the next year that she could see quite clearly. I took a deep breath, relaxation finally reaching the depth of my muscles throughout my body. After that I was passed about between my family members all asking how things were going and what I thought of Forks. Rosalie was particularly defensive when she heard about how Leah had treated me.

"That dog always had a problem with us and she's never gotten over it!" She hissed.

"Well, calling her a _dog_ doesn't exactly help ease the tension I'm sure." I replied sarcastically and I could hear the laugh of my entire family in the background as I joined it. It felt good to really laugh for a change. I'm not sure I've really had a good hardy laugh since I left home.

Leah was right about one thing, I did love my family and I do feel most comfortable with them. I would miss them terribly if my life leads me away from them, but at the same time, all babies have the leave the nest sometime and make their own way out in the big bad world. It was always the ultimate goal that I would someday grow up and lead a normal life for as long as humanly possible…and at sixteen it was already starting to happen. Granted I never expected at sixteen to know I had already met the love of my life who I would someday marry, but I wasn't upset over that by any means.

"Okay, well guys, I need to get going. They're waiting on me downstairs for breakfast and then I'm not sure what Seth has planned for us today, but he says it's a surprise, so I better get going."

"Okay, love you dear!" my mother yelled over the other goodbyes I heard from the other end of the line. I smiled as I pushed end on my phone and made my way downstairs to join the rest of the crew at the breakfast table.

Sue happily plopped another stack of pancakes on Seth and Jake's plates and I walked through the door. She had really pulled out all the stops with a full breakfast buffet. "Good morning dear!" she said with a huge smile as I walked in and took my seat next to Seth. She set a plate in front of me loaded up to pack standards and shuffled back to the kitchen to get me a cold glass of juice.

We all sat and ate and really enjoyed the company around the breakfast table. Charlie was hilarious. Bella had never mentioned what a ham he was…then again maybe being with Sue and the pack had brought it out in him over the years. I didn't really have any comparison to know.

After breakfast Seth told me to go run and get my new super warm fur lined leather aviator jacket, gloves, and a spare change of clothes just in case of emergency. The jacket had been one of the more thoughtful gifts that Seth had given me, but having now seen exactly how cold it gets here in the winter, I was far more appreciative. I came back down to find he was carrying a big basket of food. "What are we doing today?"

"Big surprise, big surprise. Grab anything you'll need for the day though, we won't be back until really late."

I ran and grabbed my cell phone charger, an umbrella, a bag to throw my spare clothes and other items in, and a few other random things that might come in handy and met Seth out at his car. We left the van with Jake and Nessie and took Seth's blue metallic Camry.

"I love the color of this car!" I said as I slid into the passenger seat. He smiled over at me. "Me too."

He said reaching over giving me a kiss and then reached over to grab my seatbelt and click it into place. I frowned. "Hey, I could have done that you know!"

"I know, I just liked having the excuse to reach across you." He said with a wink and then he put the car in reverse and headed out of town.

We drove down the road and turned on a lane that appeared to be abandoned and grown over. We twisted and wound our way to a clearing where a large white house sat in the middle of a horribly overgrown field surrounded by four large trees. It took a second and then the memory clicked and I gasped. This was the house where Nessie was born and that my family had lived in. We got out and walked around and he took out a key and opened the front door. I knew they still came back and stayed here when they happened to be in town for a day or two. It had been several years since the last time they had stayed here though, but as soon as we opened the door the smell of my family hit me in the face as though they had just been there that day. The familiar scent reminded me how much I was missing my family already. I walked around in awe at the house that almost appeared to be frozen in time. White sheets covered the furniture that was so very much my family's taste. Everywhere we ever lived we always had this very same type of furniture in varying shades of whites, creams, and tans. We wandered the house and property for a good hour before moving on.

Next he took me to a large open field and told me all about the two major conflicts that had taken place on this soil, first with the army of newborns and the later with the Volturi. I gave an involuntary shiver as I thought of the ghostly army of vampires actually standing in the place where we stood now. I wasn't in any mood to stay there any longer than completely necessary.

We made our way along US 101 stopping at various points of interest along the way looping back round the Olympic mountains and suddenly we were parked at a boarding station for a ferry. I was ecstatic to get to go on a ferry. He timed it so we would be crossing just at lunchtime and we ate our picnic lunch on the top deck looking out on the view in the distance. We had the good fortune to be crossing on a very clear day and could see the mountains in the distance so high that their snow caps looked more like floating clouds than mountain pinnacles and I could see the Space Needle on the approaching shore.

Once across the sound he took me all around Seattle. We went to the aquarium and walked along the streets stopping in at a coffee shop and indulging in real Seattle coffee as we listened to a musician croon a lamenting tune from his stool on the stage.

Just as it was starting to get dark he walked with me hand in hand to the Space Needle and went to the counter where he came back with a wide smile on his face.

"After you," he said as he directed me to get on the elevator to the top. When we got there we were met at the top with a lady directing people to go one way to the observation deck and another to the restaurant. I started to go toward the deck when Seth grabbed my waist and led me toward the restaurant section. The hostess led us to a small table next to the window of the revolving restaurant overlooking the bay. The restaurant's decor looked like something snatched right out of a rat pack movie. The brown leather booths and geometric design of the carpets screamed 1950's chic. I halfway expected Marilyn Monroe to come sashaying in to sit at the next table. I looked around in awe and then turned to look at Seth who was sitting across from me watching me with a wide smile and a devious twinkle in his eyes.

"Wow Seth, this is so amazing!" I said taking his hand. He brought it up to his lips and kissed it.

We sat and talked as we watched the scenery slowly change outside the window as the restaurant slowly revolved over the next hour. By the time the meal was over we had made the full 360-degree rotation. We paid for the meal and slowly made our way up the stairs to the observation deck.

The lights of Seattle danced in the distance as I looked out over the expanse in front of me while Seth held me around my shoulders from behind as he reached around and gently kissed my cheek and whispered in my ear. "So my Angel, did you have a good day?"

I turned around in his arms and wrapped my arms around him tipping my head back to look straight up into his face with a wide smile, "Absolutely!"

He stretched down and kissed me sending a chill down my body that had nothing to do with the biting wind that was whistling past us. I reached my hands up running them through his hair as his arms moved down to rest on my back pulling me closer as we kissed passionately in the dim glow of the city lights. The cold started creep up my legs and make me shiver so he turned me around so that my back was against the wall and he was blocking the cold and replacing it with his radiant heat as he leaned closer moving his kisses to my cheek and jaw and ending at my ears where he gently sucked my earlobe between his lips before whispering "We should probably be heading back to Forks."

I moaned lightly to which he looked up at me smiling deviously and then I tried to cover by whining, "If we have to," as I pushed my lower lip into a little pout. His eyes flipped instantly from amusement to hunger as he suddenly reached over and sucking my lower lip between his own for a second before leaning in with a passionate and seductive kiss that left me gasping as he pulled away.

He smiled again with the hint of smug deviousness; "Nobody can say I ever let my sweetheart stay unhappy for long!" and I leaned my head back and laughed. He reached forward and kissed my neck sending me in to hysterical giggles and then he stepped back and took my hand leading me back toward the elevators that would take us back to the ground floor and ultimately lead us back to his mother's house in Forks.

We went back to our car and boarded the ferry to cross back over to the other side of the sound. Seth went to open the door to get out of the car after we parked on the automobile deck, but I reached over and hit the automatic lock button when he went to open the door and reached over turning his head back toward me pulling him into a completely unexpected kiss. I was caught off guard by how much intensity I threw behind the kiss and was exceptionally pleased when it was met with a deep moan from Seth's throat, which in turn encouraged me even more.

We were suddenly a blur of moving hands as we kissed and caressed with urgency sliding through the space separating the two front seats, never breaking our kiss to find ourselves embraced in the back seat. By the time we reached the far side of the sound the windows of the car were completely fogged up and we were both a wrinkled disheveled mess. We laughed as we searched the car trying to find Seth's missing shirt that had somehow disappeared at some point during the 60-minute crossing. I looked over and gasped shocked to see that I had left a number of little red and purple love bites across his chest and shoulders. He looked down and blushed.

"Well, I definitely won't be able to go shirtless again for a little while!" I laughed and then my eyes bugged as I found myself wondering about the condition of my own neck and shoulders.

"How's my neck? Any visible evidence?" I asked stretching up to give him a better view of my neck area before buttoning my shirt back up the rest of the way. We had discovered once again that the ticklish nature of my neck appeared to disappear when I was sufficiently turned on.

He ran his hand down my neck as he leaned in close to inspect the damage, giving me a bit of a reflexive twinge in my core. "Whew…thankfully I don't see anything! Do you know how bad Jake would beat me if I brought you back covered in hickeys…not to mention if you still had them when I took you home?" He sighed as he gave my exposed neck a gentle kiss resulting in a giggle. We locked eyes and laughed.

"Oh, Jake wouldn't say anything." I finally continued. "He and Nessie understand how it is. You're right about getting home though. I bet Edward would chase you to the next county!"

We laughed together and made our way back into the front seats. We rolled down the windows and blasted the car vents on defog mode hoping to clear the glass in time to drive off the ramp and make our way back to Forks on the highway. Every once in a while we'd look over at each other and start laughing again.

We had crossed yet another barrier in our physical relationship, but it was a natural progression and it seemed like the next logical step. After all, we couldn't stay at square one for a year and a half and then jump straight to a home run, it was better to ease our way into the game, slowly getting used to the different aspects of the game as we slowly made our way into more and more of the actual goals. Technically we were still in the vicinity of second base…not quite there yet, but sliding right up next to it, which I didn't feel bad about. I knew half the girls in my school would have played a few full games by now without even being in love with their team mate. I was in love with Seth and knew that someday he was going to be my husband, but I still wanted to be good and to make not only my family, but also myself proud as well. I have to admit, it's hard to remember that in the back seat of a Camry. If we were going to stay good we were definitely going to have to limit the amount of time spent in the back seat of cars, but on this one night I didn't feel bad about the things I had done.

We drove the rest of the way home holding hands and listening to the radio. After a while my exhaustion got the better of me and I felt my eyelids flutter closed, but there was still a small smile on my face. I felt Seth look over at me and then I felt his warm fingers brush along my jaw line before I fell off into unconsciousness, happy in the knowledge that I was safe with my soul mate.

When we pulled in front of the house I felt Seth get out and walk to my door and pull me out of my seat. I woke up and tried to protest, but he shushed me and asked me to let him do this. I wrapped my arms around his neck and curled my face into his neck and let him carry me through the front door and up to our bedroom in his mother's house where he laid me gently on the bed and leaned over me to give me a long sweet kiss. When he pulled away he took off my shoes and whispered, "That was good practice for the future. Go to sleep my Angel. I'll be back in a few." Before he disappeared out into the dark hallway. I rolled over not even bothering changing into pajamas and drifted back into delicious sleep.

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Series or it's original characters.**


	55. Chapter 55

**55. Serenity Chases the Nightmares Away**

I woke up the next morning to find that I was still fully clothed laying on top of the covers of the bed. Seth lay fully clothed next to me sleeping peacefully with his face just inches from my own. A small smile flitted around the corners of his mouth indicating he was having pleasant dreams.

I gently reached over and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt to pull the material aside and assess the damage left from our back seat interlude. I was ever so slightly disappointed to see that thanks to his healing abilities only extremely light lavender shadows were left in the places where the dark purple love bites had been just a few hours before.

For a second I felt slight relief that he might avoid too much teasing, until I remembered that the next time he phased it was a possibility that he would inadvertently share the memory with the pack and they would all find out anyway. I blushed at the thought and buried my face in my pillow in my embarrassment. Then I heard a soft chuckle and lifted my eyes again to Seth's face. His eyes were twinkling at me.

"Good morning," he whispered.

"Good morning."

"Might I ask what has you blushing so early in the morning?"

"Just checked your chest to see the damage and then realized that even though the evidence is nearly gone, the guys will probably end up getting an unintentional instant replay the next time you phase anyway."

He reached over and kissed my lips tenderly. "Considering that I couldn't think of much else the rest of the night, it's highly likely."

He both laughed and he rolled onto his back pulling my head and shoulders onto his chest. I nuzzled my nose into his chest and sighed as I laid my cheek above his heart. We lay there in the soft light of dawn as I listened to the gentle cadence of his heart as his inhaling and exhaling of breath lifted and lowered my head rhythmically. After a few minutes I reached up and unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way so that I my cheek was laying against the warm flesh of his chest. I ran my hand back and forth across his torso a few times and then gently leaned up to place a gentle kiss on his chest and then another and another before finally laying my face once more against his chest. He sighed in contentment as he rubbed his warm hands along my arms and back. We stayed there until we began to hear the sounds of others waking in the house and got up ourselves taking our time getting cleaned up and dressed for the day.

After breakfast Seth decided to take me bumming around the reservation. We really hadn't spent that much time around LaPush yet and he wanted me to see more of it. We drove through as he took me to the beach showing me the cliff where they always had their bonfires and the high cliffs from which the local kids indulged in cliff diving. We walked along the path and I clutched his hand tighter and tighter the closer we got to the edge of the cliff. I never was that great with heights.

We went further down the path and through a stretch of woods and came out on a little stretch of beach dotted with tidal pools. I was completely enamored with the mini oceans teeming with life as anemones flowed back and forth lazily in the slow current of the waters. Starfish and urchins clung to the sides of the pools as tiny crabs scurried round them on their little crab errands. I could have stayed there for hours watching the little aquatic soap opera.

Finally once I had a decent fill of the amazing dioramas of the ocean, Seth took my arm again leading me back to the beach. We walked up to the store to get a drink and slowly walked down the main stretch of road waving at the friendly townspeople who would smile and wave our way as they passed.

He led us into a part of town that I hadn't been to before walking me past the buildings where he had attended high school and grade school. Just as we passed the grade school he turned to walk beside the building and begun explaining the countless summer days he had played football and baseball with the other kids on the field behind the school when I froze in my tracks, the blood draining from my face as I began to feel dizzy.

Seth turned and looked at me with concern flooding his face as he took my face between his hands, "Lina, Angel, are you okay? What's wrong?"

I pointed a shaky hand behind him at the fenced in play ground with the long field stretching behind it that crested over the top of the far hill. "My dream." I whispered.

"What? What do you mean sweetheart?"

"I've never seen this place before, but this….this was where the kids were playing in my dream. H..H..How?" My breath began to hitch in my chest and I couldn't seem to pull a full deep breath. Seth looked back to the playground and back to my face as understanding filled his eyes.

"Come on," he said turning me to walk in the other direction, carrying the majority of my weight against his side as he helped me walk. "My house isn't too far from here, we'll walk there and get you a drink and you can calm down. It's a lot closer than the car anyway."

We walked together in silence as my dream kept replaying in my mind. There was no mistaking that the playground was the one from my dream. Every piece of equipment was there just as I had seen in my dream, all the way down to the little sand pit that the babies had been playing in. I shuddered slightly in Seth's arms as he hummed a little tune to soothe me as we turned the corner and neared the house that he lived in with his sister.

As we walked up to the front door I barely noticed that Leah's car was in the driveway. Seth walked up to the front door and knocked in a familiar way that I had heard him use before at the door to my bedroom. Leah pulled open the door looking annoyed and then her gaze shifted to me and the glare faded.

"What the hell is wrong with her?"

"Long story, can we come in?"

She moved aside and watched with a frown as Seth led me to the sofa and sat me down running his hands soothingly over my hair and face before getting up and going to the kitchen. I wasn't quite as panicked as I was before, but I could still feel that my face was white, my eyes were still frantic, and my hands were still vibrating on my lap. Leah stared at me for a minute and then followed her brother in the kitchen.

"Seth, what happened to her? She looks like she's in shock."

I heard a cabinet open and a sink turn on as Seth filled a glass with water. "Night before last she had a nightmare that the Volturi were coming to attack the kids from the pack. She tried to tell them to run, but they couldn't hear her, and she reached out to pick up baby Violet and they grabbed her before she could reach her. We went for a walk today and I took her past the old school and when I took her to the back to show her the field we used to play ball in she went all pale and started freaking out. She says that in her dream they were at the old grade school playground."

He walked back to me and sat next to me putting the glass in my hand and helping me take a drink.

"So what? She saw the school and incorporated it into her dreams. No big deal."

"No Leah, she's never been to that part of the res before I took her today."

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Well, even then, maybe there were pictures from when Jake visited this summer that she saw or something." I looked up at her hopefully. Maybe that was it. Maybe that would explain it and it could all just be some big coincidence.

"I don't think so Leah," Seth whispered, "maybe, but I don't think so."

"Well, still one dream doesn't mean anything. Everyone has scary dreams from time to time."

"It wasn't her first dream like this. She had a dream right about the time that she and I started talking that involved her family too. It was different, but the only thing that was consistent was the Volturi had come for the pack. She's terrified that some day she's going to end up hurting everyone just by existing…that they will use her as an excuse to come and wipe out her family and the pack while they're at it. It may all just be a manifestation of her fears, or it might be more. Either way, she doesn't exactly handle them very well."

He stopped talking and began running his hands through my hair again and then reached to pull me back into his arms as he leaned back against the back of the couch and he hummed into my hair. I closed my eyes and finally began to let the tension go in my arms and chest. My neck finally began to relax and I turned myself so that I was hugging up to his chest with my face buried in his neck. I heard Leah leave and go into her bedroom before I finally drifted off for a short nap in the safety of Seth's arms.

My nap was extremely short as I awoke when I heard Leah walk back into the room and toss something in my lap.

"Here, put this on. You look cold." On my lap I found a black hooded sweatshirt.

"Thank you." I whispered as I pulled my arms though the sleeves and wrapped the material around me leaning back into Seth's waiting arms. I looked up to see that Seth was smiling at her in appreciation.

"Sure." She snorted as she went into the kitchen where I heard pots and pans banging. My eyelids fluttered closed again in the comfort of Seth's embrace.

I woke up a couple of hours later curled up on the couch in Leah's living room. I wiped my eyes and looked around to see the room was empty. I sat up and stretched rolling my neck a little letting it pop. I looked at the coffee table to see a sandwich, chips, and a glass of soda. Next to it was a note.

_Seth went to get the car, he'll be back any minute. I had to go to work, but I left this sandwich for you in case you woke up before he got back and were hungry. You can borrow the sweatshirt for a couple of days…I'll get it from Mom's after you leave. –Leah_

I read her note a few times grateful for her kindness, especially considering how much she resented me. I took a tentative bite of the sandwich. It was very good. I sat eating the sandwich and chips looking around the cozy living room. I was only alone a few minutes before I heard Seth's car pull up front and he rushed up through the door. He looked at me with surprise and I smiled at him handing him the note. He read it and smiled as he sat down next to me stealing a chip from my plate.

"I was hoping she'd come around some."

"Yeah, I just wish I could have talked to her more. I felt silly passing out like that."

"Hey, you needed to rest. It was a shock."

"Yeah, that's an understatement. So did you call my family and tell them about the latest drama?"

"Yes, Edward wasn't pleased. I think he thinks you may have a touch of precognition or something, but it's obviously not as accurate as Alice."

"Well of course not, I'm not a vampire and it seems like my dreams are colored by the current events in my life. The first dream revolved around the play and then yesterday was about the kids since I had just met them. If it had been last night it probably would have taken place on the space needle." I said chuckling darkly.

"Well I'm glad to see you can find some humor in it all I guess." He said looking at me a little confused.

"You know if I didn't learn to find the humor in everything I'd probably be bonkers with all the oddities in my life. Granted I'm not the most graceful at rolling with the punches, but I have to do my best and move on."

He smiled and reached over to kiss me on the cheek. He took the empty plate from in front of me and took it to the sink before coming over and pulling me to stand in front of him. "Ready to get back to Mom's?"

"Yeah, I think I could use a nice long hot bath."

He raised his eyebrows and smiled and then shook his head shamefully. "Man, I am so bad! The images that just popped into my head! Bad Seth!" He said playfully smacking himself on the side of the head. I laughed and reached up around his neck giving him a sweet playful peck and wink before walking out the front door to his car. I waited as he hit the key fob to let me in before turning to lock the deadbolt on Leah's door.

We drove back to Sue and Charlie's house in silence as we held hands. I watched out the window as the houses and faces of the peaceful people of La Push passed by. I sighed in the hope that my horrible nightmares never did actually haunt the people of the beautiful peaceful place. We parked out front and Seth held my hand as we made our way to the front door. Sue was there waiting for us and she reached out to hug me as soon as I was in the door.

"Leah called. She said that she thought you could use a little 'Momma Sue' treatment tonight. How do you feel about bubble baths?" I glanced at Seth who smiled and covered his eyes.

"Sounds like heaven!" I said turning back to Sue. "I was just telling Seth that a nice long hot bath sounded really good."

"Good, I'll go start one in our bathroom for you. The tub is much larger and more comfy. I'll light a few of my aromatherapy candles for you too." Seth looked up at the ceiling like he was being tortured and I suppressed a slight giggle. Sue continued on. "That always helps me to relax at least. And then when you're all done, if you're up for it maybe we could bake some cookies and relax with a nice movie or something."

"That all sounds wonderful Sue. Thank you!"

"No problem dear. Now you go up to your room and grab some comfy clothes to put on when you're done and I'll go start the water."

I walked up the stairs and went into our room to grab some flannel jammies out of my suitcase and I turned to see Seth standing behind me smiling with a pile of towels in his hands. I laughed and shook my head at him taking the towels from his hands and stretching up to kiss his cheek. He stepped aside and let me pass but not before whispering that he'll be waiting impatiently for me right here.

I laughed again and walked into Sue's room to see the candlelight flickering from the doorway across the room. I walked over and knocked softly just to be sure she and Charlie hadn't gotten their signals crossed. She called for me to come right in and I walked in taking a large sighing breath. The room smelled of the vanilla jasmine candles she was burning on the far counter top. She took my towels laying them on the toilet lid and turned on a CD of relaxing classical music as she left the room telling me to enjoy. I undressed and settled into the warm calming water. My muscles quickly began to relax in the soothing heat as I leaned back against the tub pillow and let my stresses and worries float away. There weren't that many occasions where I fully embraced feminine indulgences, but this was definitely one that I loved.

I stayed in the tub until the water began to feel chilly and then I grudgingly pulled myself out and dried off slipping into my warm red plaid flannel pajama bottoms and long sleeve button up top. I quickly towel dried my hair and ran a comb through it as I walked out to take my dirty clothes to our room before going downstairs to join the rest of the family. I opened the door to find Seth still lying on the bed where I had left him, appearing to be napping. I tip toed over seeing a smile playing around the corners of his mouth leading me to believe that he was faking. I leaned over him and gently placed a kiss on his lips. Suddenly his eyes popped open as he grabbed me pulling over his body to lay on the bed next to him. He deepened his kiss slightly before pulling away and burying his face in my hair.

"MMMM…you smell yummy."

"You eat a lot of vanilla and jasmine do you?"

"Okay so not so much, but yummy nonetheless."

I laughed and kissed him once more before pulling myself off the bed and turning to offer him my hands so I could pull him up too. Then I pulled him with me walking down the stairs to the kitchen while holding onto his hand to make sure he came with me. His mom was already set and ready to go with all of the ingredients out. Ness came in to join us and Seth stayed with us as we girls worked together to make several batches of different varieties of cookies while Jake and Charlie yelled mercilessly at the big screen TV in the next room.

When we were almost done Sue gave them a five minute warning that we would be taking over the TV and they would either have to find somewhere else to commiserate or they could join us. She gave me the remote and told me that we could watch anything I wanted on pay-per-view or we could watch something from their video collection.

I went over and looked at the rows of movies and spotted a movie that I thought would make most everyone happy. I thought about picking a sappy romance to fit the girls night in, but anytime I had a bad dream like the one that had been haunting me I took much more solace watching a movie where the heroine kicks ass and I knew that Jake and Charlie would be more likely to stay with such a movie with us, so I reached over and pulled out _Serenity _handing it to Seth to put in the player. He raised his eyebrows at me and laughed, showing Jake and Charlie the cover as he walked over to the player. They both cast me appreciative nods and smiled.

When Sue saw the movie on the screen she started to chastise the boys for influencing me, but when I explained to her why I had chosen it she shrugged and settled down next to Charlie. Seth came back over to the sofa and laid back against the arm of the couch with one leg up on the couch and one over the front and pulled me back to lay on the couch and snuggle back against his chest. We sat and watched the movie and Seth laughed at me as I cheered as always at the end when River single handedly wipes out all of the Reevers. I loved the fluid motion of her attacks and how she practically danced as she swung the large axes in circles around her body. It always reminded me of my family with their gracefulness and strength and I often daydreamed that I would someday have those same abilities.

I looked over a couple of times to see Sue cringing into Charlie's chest. He seemed pleased to be the strong man protecting his wife and I smiled. Jake and Nessie are just as big fans of the movie as me and they were cuddled up watching intently, Jake didn't even take his gaze away from the screen as he reached for more cookies. I reached and pulled Seth's arms a little tighter around my shoulders and nestled a little closer into his chest and sighed. It was nice to just relax together with family and to be able to be so close to him all of the time. The freedom from scrutiny of our thoughts and actions was so nice that while I missed my family, I really dreaded having to go home in a couple more days at the same time. I took Seth's hand from my arm and kissed it gently before returning it to my arm.

Soon the movie was over and we all bid one another good night before making our way up to our respective bedrooms. I slipped out to the bathroom to wash up and change into a pair of shorts and a tank top for the night, knowing that my flannel jammies would be way too hot for sleeping all night next to Seth. When I came back in Seth was laying in bed under the covers staring up at the ceiling with his hands tucked behind his head. He leaned up and looked over at me as I walked in and smiled and I couldn't help but notice that he chose to not wear a shirt to bed tonight.

I turned off the light and crossed to the bed climbing in next to him under the covers as he turned to me and pulled me into his warm embrace immediately finding my mouth with his own in the dark. Chills ran up and down my spine as he tenderly explored my mouth with his tongue. This was the downside of crossing boundaries in our physical relationship, it was too easy to skip straight to where we had just left off instead of being satisfied with some of the less intense things that we had before. I could feel the intensity building in his body as he resisted the urge to pull me closer funneling the energy instead into deepening the kiss. I pulled my hands from their place on his back and placed them on his face and running them through his hair letting my tongue dance with his gently before pulling myself closer and taking the lead. He moaned as I took control rolling him a little more on his back pulling my torso over him and his hands began to skim under the edge of the hem of my shirt.

I pulled back and looked him in the eyes. His eyes were hungry, but I knew we needed to stop ourselves. His mom trusted us to be respectful in her house and we were on the verge of crossing the threshold of what was appropriate. I put my hands on his face as I reached forward and kissed his forehead, and his nose, and his chin and then whispered to him in the dark, "I promised your mom that we would be respectful in her house." before I reached back down and kissed his lips gently once more. He nodded his head with a sigh and reached back up to kiss my lips again bringing his hands up to run through my hair.

"I can't believe we only have two more days here. I don't want to take you back there. You don't hold back as much here as you do around your family."

"I know, it's so nice to be able to really let myself think and feel whatever I want without worrying what my family would think or how it might make them feel. I love being here with you like this." I whispered leaning back down to kiss him again with the slightest bit more intensity, but being careful not to reignite the lust fire we had just fought to squelch.

I leaned up on my elbow next to him and gently ran my fingers back and forth across his chest as we sat and talked. "So tomorrow night you get to experience your first bonfire. You excited?"

I smiled widely "Yeah. I can't wait! Do they usually bring their kids or do they get sitters?"

"Some get sitters, why?"

"Just wondering?"

"Hoping to get to hold the babies again?" He said with a knowing smile.

I shrugged shyly, "mayyyybe."

He laughed and leaned forward to kiss me on the forehead. "I love you Angelina Cecelia Cullen."

"I love you too Seth Harrison Clearwater." I said leaning forward and kissing slightly more passionately again before snuggling down onto his chest with a sigh. We lay there whispering a little while longer, neither of us really wanting another day to be over, until finally my eyes fluttered closed in defeat.

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **


	56. Chapter 56

**56. Spellbinding Stories and Unexpected Bliss**

I woke up to find Seth and I were definitely becoming more and more comfortable sleeping with one another. The covers were completely gone off the bed and lost to the floor. We were still in the general spooning position, his warm arms enveloping me as he cuddled to my back, but our legs were entangled and wrapped around each other so that my feet were tucked safely under his legs to keep them warm. I laughed thinking how it was very much the instinctual positioning of a long time married couple rather than a new couple still traversing the boundaries of shirt hems. Seth was still breathing deeply behind me, the warm air of his powerful exhales blowing my hair as it pushed past my shoulder.

I wrapped my arms over his pulling them tighter in a vain attempt to hold us in this precious moment for as long as possible. I missed my family terribly, but Seth was right, I was ever so slightly freer with my thoughts and emotions here. My kisses and embraces were less tentative without the always constant knowledge that my every intention and action were being unwittingly monitored by my loved ones. Of course having to be more mindful of our actions would make keeping ourselves on track with our promise easier, but it stole a bit of the romance out of the daily aspects of a relationship at the same time.

I was so lost in my thoughts that it took a second to realize that the warm breeze blowing the hair on my shoulder had stopped. "Oh, I'm sorry I woke you honey."

"Hmmm, it's okay. Waking up next to you is better than the actual sleeping anyway." Seth replied dreamily behind me tightening his grip on my shoulders ever so slightly and turning his nose into my hair inhaling deeply.

I struggled slightly to untangle my legs and he released his grip on my shoulders ever so slightly to allow me to turn over in his arms to face him. Once I was facing him he tightened his grip again as he gently kissed my lips and I tangled our legs again finding spaces to wedge my feet in between his again to keep them warm. It was rather cool in our room this morning without the covers keeping the heat down on us, but the only part of me that seemed to notice were my feet which were now toasty warm again. We shared a few more gentle kisses before I tucked my nose into his neck and nuzzled in the warmth of his scent. I sighed and closed my eyes daydreaming about the day when we would be married and I could wake up like this with Seth every morning.

We lay this way for half an hour before a knock at the door from Jake pulled us back to reality. We told him to come in, but didn't bother to unravel ourselves from our comfy cuddle. He walked in and chuckled lightly at our lack of formality and then told us that he and Ness wanted to take me for a drive this morning while Seth spent some quality time with his Mom and sister since we would be gone all evening and then leave the next afternoon. Originally we had planned to fly back home and have Seth's things shipped, but then when things didn't work out with the movers as far as the shipment of Seth's car, we adjusted our plans and decided to cash in the tickets and use the money to rent a small Uhaul and drive it and Seth's car back home. This meant we had to leave a day early and would get home a day or two later than originally planned, but it also meant that we could do a little sight seeing as we drove back across the country from the west coast to the east. My parents agreed, to my surprise, to the change in plans, so that meant that Seth only really had today and tomorrow morning to spend with his Mom and sister.

I begrudgingly pulled myself out of Seth's warm arms to be hit by the arctic chill of the bedroom. I shivered and shuffled my way across the room to my suitcase and grabbed the supplies I needed to take a quick shower and get dressed and turned to take one last look at Seth before leaving the room. A different kind of shiver took over my body when I turned to see the look in the eyes of my literally tall, dark, and handsome boyfriend which was full of hunger and appreciation. I blushed realizing that my body was altered slightly due to the cold creating a "sunshine moment" for my handsome mate and rushed out of the room to avoid any further temptations to cross any more intimacy barriers this morning. I could hear him laughing as I slammed the door behind me.

Not too long after I entered the bathroom he knocked on the bathroom door informing me that he was going to go for a run and he'd see me later on in the day. I looked up at the mirror to see that my face was bright red as I hoped against hope that none of the pack members would be phased this morning and he would be able to run out his impulses in peace and privacy. I knew that the chances of that were pretty slim, but a girl could still hope right?

Twenty minutes later I was clean, dry, dressed and ready to meet the day with my siblings. We got in the car and drove as they began to weave their own tales of Forks and the family. They had quite a few juicier stories about the family to share as we once again returned to the overgrown homestead and toured the grounds. Feeling nostalgic, Nessie even requested that we hike out to the cottage that she and her parents had lived in during her childhood until they moved away when she was five after her aging had slowed a great deal more and she would be able to attend new schools without the scrutiny of the locals. I had heard many stories of the cottage, but seeing it for myself, I could see why Bella loved it so much. It was almost as though someone had plucked it directly out of a fairytale. Even with the many years of disuse it still looked so pretty and perfect nestled in the woods. Jake freed the key from its hiding place in the eaves of the doorway and we went in to explore. Nessie was so excited as she kept running from room to room and grabbing Jake and I to show us both her memories simultaneously. It definitely had the feel of a Cullen gift house…the biggest giveaway being the massive walk in closet that was always commissioned by Alice any time they undertook a new project. I was so fascinated with the small glimpses of the past through the gifts of my sister. It was really so much better than just hearing a story and a lot of times ever so much sweeter when tempered by the sweet impressions of a small child.

We spent most of the morning at the old homestead before moving on. Next they took me to First Beach and grabbed lunch from the store and ate as we walked along the beach as Jacob told me about how he had unwittingly voided the treaty the first time he met Bella as they walked and talked along this very beach and about the time they spent together in Edward's absence as she desperately tried to heal the hole in her heart. I was actually amazed that how easily Jake and Nessie were able to discuss the past in which Jake had been in love with Bella and had tried to win her heart. It astounded me that there really seemed to be no jealousy or awkwardness in regard to this strange twist in their relationship. I guess it must be the confidence of an imprinting relationship that allowed them to discuss it so freely without ill feelings. I couldn't help but think about the fact that I was grateful to not have a great love of Seth's past to have to compete with. Other than a few dates and a few kisses, Seth had nearly as vacant a romantic history as me.

I had heard a few of these stories growing up, but it was so much more vivid standing in the places where the events took place. My favorite and yet most disturbing story was how Bella had attempted cliff jumping only to nearly drown which ultimately resulted in the miscommunication that led Edward to Volterra in order to attempt to coerce the Volturi to take his life. Even though I knew the outcome I was still on the edge of my seat listening to the harrowing tale of how Bella barely reached him in time to keep him from revealing himself in order to force the guard to kill him and her first encounter with the guard. Of course, Jake hadn't been there to experience the Volterra story personally, but I guess the many years of listening to his father weave the tales of the tribal legends taught him how to tell a killer story. It was still so hard for me to imagine the Volturi as a good entity since my entire life my family had been mentally preparing and bracing for the day when the guard would return to seek vengeance on our family and wipe out their perceived threat.

It was approaching late afternoon when we finally decided that it was probably time to be heading back to Charlie and Sue's to clean up and get ready for the night's festivities. We had just turned to walk back toward the car when I heard a whistle from behind me and turned to see Seth's tall form step out of the tree line and head toward us. I smiled with glee having missed him all day to spite the highly intriguing storytelling and with a little squeal ran to meet him halfway jumping into his arms and wrapping my legs around his waist. He laughed, the smile on his face and eyes matching my own, and he kissed me.

"How was your day my Angel?"

"Awesome! I heard the most amazing stories about my family that I had never heard before! But I missed you!" I added pouting my lip slightly at the end. He leaned forward and just like at the space needle she pulled my protruding lip between his own and sucked it ever so slightly before giving me a long sweet kiss that resulted in a new smile.

"Ha! Chased that pouty lip away again! I'm so good!" he said finally setting me back down on my feet again with a triumphant smile as I laughed. I turned around to look for Jake and Nessie to see that the car was gone. I guessed either they were coming back later or I was taking a wolf ride back to Sue and Charlie's.

"So, how was your day?" I asked curious to how things had gone with Leah more than anything. He knew exactly what I was getting at and got straight to the point.

"Pretty good. Actually it started off a little bit awkward." He said leading me to a twisted tree stranded on the rocky beach where we sat straddling it facing each other. "She just so happened to be the only one who was phased when I took off on my run this morning."

I blushed a deep crimson, "Oh you're kidding me!"

"I wish!" he said as his face began to match my own.

"Anyway, she let me run for a while on my own and then phased back and we ran together for a while and well we really communicated a lot. She got to see exactly how I feel about you and how amazing you really are and I got to see all the feelings that she's been struggling with. I think the hardest part was watching me imprint before her and then that leading to me moving away really made her develop an irrational hate for you just to give her something to focus her pain on. By the time we were done this morning she was feeling really bad for the way she treated you."

"Well, she shouldn't. I really do understand and she wasn't all wrong. I had been seeing some of the things she had been saying all day that day. I had even been voicing those very same fears to you just before we left your house and went to the barbeque. Besides, she tried to make it up to me in her own way later. It was so sweet of her to loan me her shirt, and make me that sandwich, and call and ask her Mom to do the whole bubble bath cookie night thing for me. That was all really nice."

He leaned forward and pushed my hair way from my face and kissed my forehead as he smiled at me. "Well, I think she's changed her mind about the bonfire tonight, so I'm hoping that she really does come and maybe you guys can get to know each other a little better before we leave. In the meantime, we should probably get you back to Mom's and get you warmed up. You look like a little popsicle over there!"

He was right, it had been a long day wandering around the forest in the cold of a Washington December. I had barely noticed in my excitement to hear more stories of my families past, but now, sitting on the beach with the sea breeze blasting me without any barriers, I was beginning to get really cold again. He pulled me into his arms, and I buried my ice-cold nose against his neck. He laughed as he reached back and rubbed it under his hand lightly before taking my hand and leading me toward the tree line.

I stood jumping up and down and rubbing my hands together for friction while I waited for him to undress and phase and then when I heard his soft whine I tripped my way through the underbrush to find him in a small clearing a few dozen feet in and climbed on top laying down so that his warm fur could help insulate me and held tight to his neck as he slowly stood up and began to make his way to his mother's house. The cold wind was especially fierce against my face so I tucked my face straight into the fur of his neck and buried my nose all the way down to the skin beneath. I was suddenly so warm and cozy, my face completely enveloped in his warm comforting scent that I relaxed completely and nearly fell asleep. He finally slowed and gently lowered to the ground turning his head and nudging my body with his nose with a soft whine.

"Noooo, I don't want to get off!" I whined. "You're too warm and cozy!"

He let out a soft chuckle and then nudged me again and I reluctantly pulled myself free of his warm coat and stood facing away from him so that he could phase in privacy without me getting lost trying to find my way to the house.

Suddenly I could hear his human voice chuckling behind me before I heard the rustle of his clothes being pulled back over his body. Then I felt his warm arms around my shoulders and I turned to bury my nose in his chest.

"I was afraid you were going to fall off there a couple of times." He chuckled into my hair as he led me toward his mother's house.

Thankfully I had waited for him because the direction my instincts told me to go was the totally wrong direction. A few feet later we were standing behind the fire circle facing the back of Sue and Charlie's house. We made our way up to the house and entered the back door. Seth led me straight to the den where a fire was burning in the fireplace and he sat in the loveseat closest to the fire and pulled me into his arms, so his embrace warmed most of me and the fire warmed the rest. I cuddled up in his chest and closed my eyes, happy in the warmth of his embrace. Through my closed eyelids I saw a bright flash and my eyes flew open to find Sue standing there smiling with a digital camera in her hands pointed at us.

"Awe, now that's one for the mantle!" She exclaimed. "You two are so adorable together. Come on, sit up so I can take a proper portrait of the two of you!"

We sat up and posed for a picture, then she made us take one looking at each other, then she made us move to pose in front of the fireplace, then she made us change positions. Ten minutes later she had taken several dozen pictures of us in various poses around the house.

"Hey Mom, please send copies of those to my email and Esme. I'm sure she'd love to have them too." Seth said with a smile as he pulled me over to the wrap around couch to lay curled up next to him. We stayed there a long time staring at each other as he gently ran his fingers through my hair and across my cheek. I sighed wishing I could take this moment, another in a series we had shared this week, and freeze it in time and just stay here as long as we wanted, but I knew the time was approaching when I would need to pull myself upstairs and get cleaned up and changed for the bonfire.

A few minutes later Nessie and Jake walked in and Nessie pulled me up dragging me upstairs to help me find a good collection of clothes to layer in order to keep myself warm and yet be able to peel and reduce if necessary. She was well acquainted with the varying clothing needs at a winter night bonfire such as this. Finally done layering me from head to toe in gradually thickening clothing, she turned to me and smiled handing me Leah's sweatshirt.

"You can give this back to her tonight."

"Thanks for your help Ness."

"No Problem." She smiled as she turned to leave, but I had one more question.

"Uh Ness?"

"Yeah?" She asked spinning around to re-enter the room.

"Can I ask you a personal question? About you and Jake?"

"Suuure." She responded a little hesitantly.

"Was it really difficult to keep things moving slowly? I mean with the whole imprint thing, Seth and I already feel so…connected…in every way, and well it makes it hard to keep things from progressing more quickly than maybe it should. I know you guys had quite a few years that you had a different relationship first so maybe it was different, but was it really hard? And how did you deal with it?"

"Ah, I was waiting for this conversation." She said smiling warmly and pulling me over to the bed. For a second I was afraid she was going to 'show' me, which I really wasn't sure I was ready for, but instead she sat down next to me and faced me on the bed.

"Yeah, it was really hard, and to be honest, there are many things that happened between us that nobody knows about besides Jake and myself."

I looked at her shocked not understanding how that was even possible with her Dad. She laughed at me.

"Oh Lina, you know that there are ways to keep Dad from knowing things. You've been doing it for over a decade, just maybe not realizing you were doing it. Just like how you kept the whole wallowing days from him when he and Jasper would hunt. It's possible. You just have to be really careful to learn not to think of things except for certain times and how to bury or mask your thoughts behind other things he would find more interesting to distract him. It's not easy, but possible if you're desperate enough."

"Anyway, you two will just have to feel your way on your own. From what I hear from Jake you guys have been doing an amazingly good job of reigning yourselves in so far. Better than we did actually, although maybe it helps that you guys set your own rules and promised on your own instead of to someone else…like we had done with my parents. But the further you guys go the more and more difficult it's going to get to hold off…especially for Seth. Once you cross a line, it's really pretty much impossible for you to go back. Just try to remember that when you're tempted because you'll never regain that innocence you once had. It's already getting harder and harder for Seth though. You're just too dang sexy for your own good." She joked poking me in the side playfully and raising her eyebrows suggestively.

"Just don't be too hard on yourselves when you do find it yourself crossing lines as you get closer and closer emotionally. After all, you're in love and I'm guessing that if it weren't for the age thing you'd probably already be married. Actually, if you were to define marriage not as a legally binding contract or a ceremony you perform in front of a group of friends and family, but rather an absolute commitment between two people to keep themselves only for each other for the rest of eternity, then you've already been married for quite some time…not that your parents or mine would ever see it that way…but that's how I saw it with Jake. That's one of the other benefits of imprinting. A lot of girls go around making the choice to push the physical barriers of their relationship believing whole heartedly that they're with the person that they will spend the rest of their lives with only to find out they were wrong and be left broken. As imprints, it sort of takes away that mystery. Anyway, that was a really, really long way of saying, that in the end it's up to you and Seth to decide what happens when because at the end of the day it's the progress of the most important relationship in your life and the only limits you guys will really keep are the ones that you set yourselves. My suggestion is to savor it all, every step, and don't rush past anything, but it really is easier said than done. Trust me…I know."

"Thank you Nessie. You may not believe it, but that really does help!" I said giving her a big hug. "I love you."

"I love you too." She said with a big smile stroking my hair a few times like she used to do when I was little. "Enjoy your night tonight."

"I will," I said stripping several of the heavy layers back off and tossing them in my backpack as I headed back downstairs to find Seth and she went back into her room to change.

I went downstairs to meet a smiling Seth at the bottom of the stairs. "I assume you heard all of that?"

"Sorry…wolf hearing…kind of hard not to."

"It's okay. It saves me from having to repeat it to you later. What do you think about what she had to say?"

"She's absolutely right. It's our promise to keep and in the end the only promises we would be able to keep would be the ones to each other." He pulled me in a tight hug and pulled me back to sit in front of the fire. "I did like what she had to say about the marriage thing. I have found myself thinking the same thing before."

"Yeah, Me too."

"Well, it got me to thinking about something else. At Christmas I had to fight the urge to propose to you right then thinking that it wasn't proper somehow…but it didn't stop me from thinking ahead. And after what Nessie said just now it made me realize that I want to do something." My eyes widened as he got down in the floor in front of me and got into the traditional kneeling position…you know the one…the one that you dream of the man you love getting into someday. He reached into his pocket and he pulled out a little black velvet box that had the same store name on the outside that my promise ring had been in. He slowly cracked the box open and I gasped.

"Angelina Cecelia Cullen, even before I saw your face in person and suddenly you were the most important person to ever walk the planet in my eyes, you were already the woman that I knew I would love until the day I die. Will you please do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

I couldn't even see his face for the blurry tears that had filled my eyes, but I could feel the smile so wide that it completely filled my face. I couldn't even find my voice to answer, instead I reached up and grabbed his face between my hands and pulled him to me placing the strongest, most passionate kiss I had ever managed to imagine on his lips.

When I finally pulled back just far enough to look into his beautiful brown eyes I whispered "Yes, a thousand times yes!" The biggest warmest smile I had ever seen grace his beautiful face spread across his lips as tears began to form in the corners of his eyes. He leaned forward bridging the slight gap between us and kissed me again as I ran my hands behind his head and grasped his hair with my right hand as my left reached under his arm and around his back and pulled him as close as possible. We kissed for the longest time, as it seemed the whole world stood still for us.

He finally pulled away excited to get the ring on my finger. He gently slid my promise ring off first and moved it from my left hand to my right and then pulled the large heart shaped solitaire out of it's box and angled it to read the inscription.

"I got these rings on the same day. Actually I got the engagement ring first and then convinced myself it was too soon and got the promise ring."

I read the engraving that sparkled inside the band. _To the future Mrs. Clearwater: My Present, My Future, My Always and Forever._

There were no words to describe how I felt in that moment. The love, the devotion, the desire to show him how much I loved him, to care for and appreciate him, to give him every happiness this life had to offer, to give over every piece of me in every way…It was all so overwhelming.

He slipped the sparkling diamond on the ring finger of my left hand with such reverence it made my heart want to explode in my chest from pure elation. He looked up to my face once it reached its destination and slowly pulled the ring up to his lips never taking his eyes away from my own and kissed it, and then again just above it, and higher and higher, never breaking his gaze from my own until he reached my shoulder. Electricity crackled through my body with every kiss and when his lips touched my neck his touch was only met with a sigh and a gasp. I could feel him smile against my skin as he made his way up past my ear, nibbling it slightly as he passed to incite a slight moan and then to my mouth at which point I grabbed him and pulled him with me as I laid back on the couch, pulling him on top of me, my kiss deep and full of longing. He moaned and met the intensity of my kiss with equal passion, our mouths moving together, tongues teasing and tasting, neither of us pulling apart to breathe, we couldn't bear too. Finally when our lungs were burning we finally pulled away, panting loudly as he laid his head on my chest, nuzzling his nose into the crook of my neck.

We probably would have stayed there like that all night if the sound of someone clearing their throats behind us hadn't made us jump up to look. Charlie, Sue, Jake and Nessie were all standing in the kitchen smiling at us. I had no idea how long they had been watching, but at least they had been compassionate enough to let us have our moment. We stood up and Sue ran across the room to hug us both at once with tears running down her face.

"You two are the sweetest things I've ever seen in my life! I'm so happy! I know you have to wait until she turns eighteen at the very least, but I don't care! I'm so happy! I'm going to have a new daughter!!!"

Charlie was next to hug us and congratulate us, followed by Nessie and Jake. Nessie smiled at me knowingly…almost like she knew this was going to happen. Diabolical sisters are everywhere, but God bless this one…I owed her big time!

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **


	57. Chapter 57

**57. Paleface Angel**

I walked hand in hand with Seth as we made our way from the parking lot at the beach to the rocky overlook with the raging bonfire at its center. I could feel the band of my engagement ring on my finger as Seth grasped my hand gently in his own. I couldn't help but look down occasionally and steal a glance at the glistening stone in the bright moonlight. We walked up to the edge of the grouping of people and as soon as the first person saw us we were bombarded with a crowd of people offering their congratulations and wanting to see the ring. News traveled faster in this group than a knitting club. We had been engaged for less than an hour and the whole reservation knew!

Earlier that night, after we were through showing off the ring to the four observers of the proposal, we made a phone call home to let my family know. They were just as ecstatic as Sue and were excited to see us when we got home. Sue promised to email the pictures she had taken today as well as the pictures of the ring as soon as she was done on the phone. She, my mother, and Alice were already getting way ahead of themselves discussing wedding plans that would not come to fruition for at least a year and a half, if not more. We smiled and rolled our eyes slightly as we slipped out to go enjoy our night on the beach leaving them to their discussions of seasons and flowers and dresses.

Seth's second call that evening was to Leah. He wanted to make sure she was the first in La Push to know, and since we hadn't actually told anyone else in the area yet, I found myself wondering if she wasn't our leak. It made me smile to think that she might be…it would sort of be like a symbolic form of giving her blessing.

We finally managed to free ourselves from the crowd of well wishers and move a little closer to the fire since the cold was already starting to get to me and when we got to the edge of the fire I saw a lone silhouette against the backdrop of the full moon rising on the horizon. The silhouette was seated on the far side of the fire on the bench located closest to the cliff and looked out onto the moonlit waves in the distance. Seth saw the same time I did and smiled, guiding me closer. Once we got around the side of the fire and got a few steps closer, the silhouette became more defined and I recognized her long flowing silky raven hair just as she turned to look at us. She smiled at Seth and stood up walking over to him and giving him a big hug and then she looked at me, her face soft and kind every bit of the fire behind her eyes during our first meeting was completely gone.

"Congratulations Lina." She said as she gave me a tentative hug. "You just made him the happiest wolf man to walk the Earth, and trust me, I got to experience when every one of these yahoos got engaged." She joked jabbing Seth in the side with her elbow. He smiled down at her with the sweetest look. I could tell that for the first time since I met him he was truly and completely happy.

"I think that has a little to do with you two working out your stuff today too." I said with a smile. "Thank you for that by the way…thank you for forgiving him. I'm sorry I'm taking him away. I feel so bad about that, but at the same time, I'm still officially a teenager and so I can't really move here…well not without dragging along five vampire couples who have already spent enough time around here to bring on suspicion to the fact that they never seem to age."

"It's okay. I understand…besides we can't all stay around here forever. What I need to do is stop talking about it and actually get out of here for a while and see some more of the world."

"Yeah, you totally should. Matter of fact, you should come visit us…maybe this summer or something. Yeah, you'd have to deal with being around my family, but Seth's got his own house now that's 500 feet away from the nearest vampires and we even have a room in the basement that we could easily convert into a guest room."

Seth smiled down at me as I talked, his eyes twinkling in the firelight. He pulled me closer to his side and placed a kiss on my hair before turning to Leah. "See, I told you she was the sweetest person you'll ever meet."

She smiled up at him obviously thinking sarcastic thoughts about how tragically sappy we were, but she kept them to herself. She sat thinking for a few minutes before she actually formulated an answer that she felt she could share. "Um, Thank you Lina. That's really sweet. We'll see. Maybe for a week or two at the very least."

I smiled widely, happy to be possibly getting a chance to get to know her better. "Great! I'll try to have Seth and I do as much of the renovations ourselves so that maybe the smell won't bother you too badly…although according to Quil I carry all of their scents so strongly I could be one myself." I said shrugging.

Seth laughed out loud. "He was only messing with you baby. It isn't that bad. I thought the way you came back at him you knew he was just ribbing you."

"I did, but I still figure it's probably got a ring of truth to it…and _you_ probably wouldn't notice if I literally bathed in their scents considering I'm your imprint and all!"

All three of us laughed now. It was nice that we were able to sit easily together.

"Oh I almost forgot." I pulled Leah's sweatshirt out of my backpack. "I wanted to give this back to you personally if I saw you and tell you thank you. It was really sweet of you to let me borrow this and leave the sandwich for me and to call your Mom like that. I really appreciated it."

"Ha,ha…yeah, I heard you picked out _Serenity_ for the movie night movie. You totally baffled her with that one! She just couldn't understand it at all." She said laughing as she took the shirt from my hands.

"Can I help if I prefer to watch a tough girl kick ass after having a nightmare that I'm about to be killed than to watch a love story that doesn't even hold a candle to my real life right now?"

She smiled as she cast a sideways glance at her brother, "You're right, I am going to like her."

"I told you that you two were a lot more alike than you realized." He said putting his arm around her shoulder too. We sat there in silence a while, enjoying the sounds of the ocean crashing onto the cliffs behind us as we watched the bonfire of driftwood crackle with a rainbow of colors.

The night went on with more food than I had ever seen served at a single event. Not too long after we arrived Collin and Lily arrived with Daisy and Violet in tow. As soon as Violet saw me she squealed and reached for me opening and closing her hands. I smiled and walked over to her asking Lily if she minded. She handed the beautiful baby girl over to me willingly. Violet cooed at me and grabbed my hair pulling it in front of her face and peeking out from behind it occasionally to which I'd say 'peek a boo' and she'd squeal again. I looked up to see Seth staring at me in fascination as I interacted with the sweet baby girl, a goofy smile spread wide across his face. I took Violet's hand and had her wave at him from our place by her mother and then I asked if she minded if I took her with me to sit next to Seth. She basically implied Vi was mine for the night if I wanted her and I chuckled and made my way over to sit with her between Seth and Leah.

Leah looked at the baby and me curiously as I interacted with her and then Violet looked over and smiled at Leah with the same bright look as she had given me the first time I met her in line at the barbeque. Leah smiled back and then the baby reached for her and Leah tentatively took her in her arms. She looked nervously at me at first as I smiled at her encouragingly and talked to Violet in her lap. After a few minutes she relaxed a bit and even started to play with the baby wrapping her in her sweatshirt to make sure she stayed extra warm. Violet sat contentedly in Leah's lap the rest of the night finally curling up to her chest and falling asleep.

Leah looked down at the sleeping angel and a tear formed in the corner of her eye. I tentatively put a gentle arm around her shoulders and whispered in her ear. "Someday Leah…don't give up hope. God wouldn't give you that gift you just displayed with her without having a use for it in your future. Somehow, someway, when the time is right it will all happen. I truly believe that."

She looked up at me as the single tear ran down her face and smiled at me timidly. I could tell she wasn't sure she believed that even though she wanted to. I smiled back confidently and nodded at her. She returned her gaze to baby Violet and didn't look back up the rest of the night until the stories began.

Seth reached over having heard every word I said and pulled me into a tight hug again and kissed my head as he leaned down into my ear and whispered. "I'm the luckiest man in the world…you know that right?"

"I'm not sure about that, but I know I'm the luckiest woman." He leaned down and kissed me before pulling me back to his chest.

The moon was high in the sky when Billy and a couple of the other Elders called everyone around to share the legends of the tribe. I sat spellbound on the bench in front of Seth and leaned back against his warm chest with his warm arms enveloping me as Billy's voice filled the night.

"Tonight we honor the imprints of our tribe." Almost on cue every pack member around the fire wrapped their arms around their mates affectionately. "Everyone speaks of the strength of the protectors, or their vigilance and importance for our people, but rarely are mentioned their true strength which comes from their most precious imprints. The magic held in the pack is obvious, it's physical, you can see it in it's majesty as they run through our forests, but that is not the only magic in this tribe. The greater magic is in the object of their imprinting. They are our greatest protectors, they protect our homes, our lives, our hearts, our future in their wombs, and they complete us where we fall short. The most famous of all the imprints is of course the third wife, who sacrificed her life to distract the red eye and allow Taha Aki and his young newly transformed sons to finish off the cold woman."

"There is another story of another imprint that is not so well known and rarely spoken of. It is not an ancient tale as that of the third wife, but only goes back a few generations in this tribe. Many of you have noticed that most of our imprints are of Quileute or Makah blood but occasionally we find our imprints outside of the tribes. The first of these imprints went by the name of Mary Luna. She was not considered the most beautiful of the pale faces, but yet she was not plain. She had come across on a wagon train from the east as the young bride of a holy man. Her husband was not of a strong enough constitution to survive the brutal winters of the west and died the first winter on the train before reaching these shores, but Mary Luna, not having anyone to return to back east, continued onward finally reaching our shores with a few families who settled in Portland."

"Mary Luna, guided by her dreams, traveled North along the coast on her own and in her travels met a member of our tribe, the last of his pack to be left without an imprint, he left the pack in his sadness to wonder alone." Suddenly I felt myself sit closer listening as intently as possible. Some of this story was starting to sound startlingly familiar. I looked and noticed that my fiancée and my siblings were also showing the same interest.

"He first saw her while in his wolf form and instantly knew that his life was bound to hers. He followed the angel for days following his instinct to protect her from harm, but unable to introduce himself in human form lacking in proper clothing and unable to speak her foreign language."

"As her journey brought her closer to Quileute land, he feared for her safety if discovered by patrol and kept even closer watch than before. One day she happened across a hungry bear starving in the forest. Just as the bear was about to deliver a deadly blow the young spirit wolf jumped in between them saving Mary Luna by taking the blow upon himself breaking many bones and tearing deep gashes in his skin. With the little strength left in his injured body he killed the bear and collapsed on the ground returning to his human body before her eyes."

"Mary Luna was scared, but also grateful for this unknown wolf man who rescued her from harm. She carefully covered his modesty and began to care of his injuries, only realizing that he was what had inspired her journey up the coast when she turned him to treat the injuries on his face. For it was he that she had dreamed of night after night that led her to wander the coast in search for answers."

"She spent two days treating his many wounds, amazed by how quickly his body mended itself. On the third day the warrior awoke in his man form amazed to find that his angel was caring for him and speaking to him. He suddenly remembered the attack and realized that she had seen him change and had cared for him and did not seem frightened. The difference in language was frustrating, but with time and work they learned to understand one another slowly learning each other's language. As they began to communicate more and more the warrior was finally able to understand the full reason his angel had traveled so far and put herself in danger to find him. Not only did she dream of him but of his people and a danger that was coming to find them, and danger that would seek to destroy their future, their wives and their children. A great plague was to touch the tribe and without warning they would not survive."

I felt Seth's arms tighten around my shoulders and his breath catch in his chest as it did mine. It all sounded far too familiar…eerily so.

"They reached the tribe to warn them and were greeted warmly by the people of the tribe. They had missed the warrior and were happy to see he imprinted even if it was with a paleface. They heeded the warnings of the warrior and his imprint and prepared for the coming danger."

"The children of the village loved the paleface angel. They flocked to her and adored her, listening to her stories as she told them in a broken form of our language with the little knowledge she had gained from the warrior. They followed her every instruction and listened to her instructions and warnings more intently than their own parents. She began to teach the children of the village her language so the next time they encountered palefaces they would be able to communicate with them and bargain with them and protect themselves from those who wished the tribe ill will. She was soon married to the warrior and lived happily with the Quileute."

"One day the danger of the angel's dreams came in the form of soliders," I reached up and grabbed Seth's hand. He held on to me tightly as we continued to listen. "an army of the paleface government marched onto our lands demanding to speak to the chief. Having learned the language from the paleface angel, he was able to speak with the leader of the soldiers and hold off a deadly battle. But a month later in the dark of the night the army came and a fight started. The paleface angel gathered the children and led them to a cave in the forest and there they listened to her instruction and hid for five days. On the fifth day the angel's warrior came to them in spirit wolf form and led them back to the village. Many were dead. Women, men, young, old, warrior, and caretaker alike all slaughtered with only a half of the remaining population surviving. The paleface angel helped all to heal and she and the warrior cared for all the children who were left without caretakers after the massacre."

"The Quileute would have died that day if the paleface angel, Mary Luna, had not come west and listened to her dreams and become the imprint of the warrior. If the Quileute had not been open of heart and listened to the warnings of the paleface angel and learned her ways they would have never survived the first meeting of the paleface army. If the children of the Quileute had not listened to the paleface angel and her instructions, our future would have died that night and the Quileutes would not exist today. Mary Luna, the paleface angel, may be one of the most important legends in our history. We feel on this day when we welcome the first wholly paleface imprint in two generations to our tribe, that this is a good day to share and rejoice in the legend of the paleface angel, Mary Luna, a true story of the magic of the imprint and proof that we should cherish each angel to grace the lives of each lucky warrior."

The story finished to a resounding cheer from the pack, each member turning to their wives with doting looks of love and long cherished kisses. I slowly turned to look at Seth and he looked down at me with a gaze of such amazement and love. He leaned forward and kissed my lips and pulled me into his arms as he covered the top of my head with a sea of kisses.

The revelers slowly slipped away into the night, even Jake and Nessie finally left. Eventually we sat alone on the cliff top the embers of the bonfire dimming into bright red coals as we sat together wrapped in one another's arms looking out at ocean waves in the moonlight from our bench, listening to it's rhythmic crashing on the cliffs below.

Finally Seth broke the silence. "My Present, My Future, My Always and Forever…no matter what happens, when it happens, how it happens…we are going to face it together." He whispered as he looked at me in the bright light of the full moon. "I promise you that."

I reached up and placed my hand on his face as I looked back into his soulful eyes. "Always and Forever," I whispered and I placed a gentle kiss on his lips before laying my head back on his chest to listen to the steady cadence of his calm and faithful heartbeat.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Twilight Series or any of Stephenie Meyer's original characters or storylines. **

_**Author's Note: Okay guys, that's it for In the Shadow of the Day. Tell me what you thought. Yes, I am working on a sequel that will keep going with the story of Seth and Lina, first chapter already has two paragraphs written, so I'll probably add one more chapter on here when I get it posted to direct any of you who haven't added me to your author alert when I get it up and going. It shouldn't be too terribly long…maybe a week? Maybe…**_

_**Anyway, thank you all so much to those of you who faithfully read and reviewed the story and kept encouraging me to keep going. And also thank you to those of you who read faithfully but didn't review. I have a feeling since there are over 50 alerts, and yet nowhere near that many reviewers, that some of you are either shy or just don't know what to say. Either way I'm just grateful that you liked it enough to add it to your lists!**_

_**Please give me your feedback. Even if you don't like it I don't mind hearing constructive criticism, just please don't flame it. And if you really, really, really liked it and think its twilight award worthy then please follow the link from my profile page and nominate it! **_

_**Thank you all so much for your patience and love for Seth and Lina. I'm so excited to have actually completed a story and am now psyched to get going on volume two!**_

_**Thanks Again!**_

_**A Cullen Wannabe**_


	58. Chapter 58

Author's Note: Okay Guys…chapter one of the sequel is up. I named the new story **Chasing Away The Shadows**. Hope you like it. I'm already overflowing with ideas, faster than I can get them out in fact. Thanks for your Interest!!!!


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